Walking On Sunshine
by betterleftblank
Summary: Sequel to "Today I Met The Girl I'm Going To Marry". It takes places two years later.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N So, a few things to say before I get this show on the road. Just a fair warning, this sequel is in progress. Updates will be happening daily until we catch up. I have some other stories to post but they are being re-edited right now so I thought I would get this going. I hope you enjoy and even though this isn't done yet, I am 100% committed to finishing it. **

**While you don't have to read the short fic I posted after Today I Met...titled "Meet the Carlins" (the story was in Jessie's POV and added in at the end) I do suggest taking a look at it otherwise you might be a little confused over the next couple of chapters.**

**This takes place about two years after the original story.  
**

**The song used in this update will be posted at the end of it.  
**

Chapter1

I yell upstairs to see if Ashley is ready and I get a request back from her for five more minutes.

That girl can take forever to get dressed!

We do have time to spare however, so I'm not going to bother Ashley about her diva like ways.

Ok, ok, she is the farthest thing from a diva, and believe me I've represented many of those over the years. But I enjoy teasing her because it's fun and I love the adorable pout she sports when I do.

I'm actually grateful for this extra time because it gives me an opportunity to get some dancing in.

It's been a hectic couple of weeks and dancing always puts me in a good mood. Plus, tonight is a big night for us and I'm already getting nervous.

I shouldn't be nervous, but I am.

Good thing I picked out my dress a few months ago or I'd be freaking out right about now.

Not that I freak out about a lot of things though.

I had a smart remark all ready to go but the laughter in my head about what I just thought distracted me.

You'd think it would be me running around trying to look my best because I got a new dress for the occasion while Ashley will be wearing something from her closet.

I know the change in me is shocking!

I've grown.

I've matured.

I am a new woman.

I still roar don't get me wrong, but I'm a lot more composed and level headed than I used to be.

Or, you know, I had professionals come over a few hours ago to get me all gussied up for tonight.

Hey at least I had the foresight to plan ahead unlike a certain someone who has the hottest body on earth and can make me swoon like no other.

No, I'm not referring to Lena Headey; I was referring to one Ashley Davies.

Geez!

I would have thought that was obvious.

Right, where was I?

Oh yeah, she's upstairs trying on what I assume are a million different outfits but I know better than to try and hurry her up.

She gets a little bit ornery when I put the pressure on her.

Not the good kind of pressure.

Ashley loves that kind of pressure!

And so do I!

I'm referring to the hurry-up-we're-going-to-be-late-and-cause-a-scene kind of pressure.

And tonight is definitely an occasion I don't want to be late for.

I walk into the living room.

The living room of our house!

You heard correctly.

Our house!

After Ashley's first tour wrapped up we went house shopping and I fell in love with this one instantly.

What can I say, I fall in love at first sight when it counts.

It's not a huge mansion or anything but it does have a recording studio in the basement for Ashley to work at home when she wants to, and more importantly, a pool.

We all know what having a pool around means!

I don't have to spell it out for you.

Right?

Life has been fairly good to Ashley and me over the past two years.

I really have no complaints.

Well, there might be one complaint I have but soon enough it's going to be taken care of.

Until then, I have important matters that need to be addressed.

For example, what song am I going to dance to?

Decisions.

Decisions.

I scan the CDs already in the stereo but they're all Ashley's and frankly I can't dance to her taste in music.

It's all "rock this" and "rock that" and I'm in the mood to let my hair down and boogie oogie ooogie.

I realize my hair is actually down; for once, I wasn't being literal.

I squeal in delight when my eyes fall on one of my CDs.

I really do have the best ideas.

No, seriously, I do!

I do!

Oh those are two great words.

Moving on.

I crank the volume up, but not too loud, and then I hit play.

This is going to be so much fun!

I swivel my hips and feet across the floor as I let myself get lost in the moment.

I can't get too into this number or I'll ruin my hair and makeup, but I still plan on moving and grooving like only I can.

Wee!

I'm already having a blast!

This song is such a classic!

_Been working so hard  
I'm punching my card_

I really have been working hard on Ashley's career.

But let me tell you it doesn't seem like work.

I love her.

I love what I do.

And I've never been happier.

_Eight hours, for what  
Oh, tell me what I got _

I have the best girl in the world.

That's what I've got.

Woo!

And how could I forget, hoo!

_I've got this feeling  
That time's just holding me down_

I air guitar like nobody's business as I shake my perfectly coiffed hair.

So what if it gets messed up?

I'll just tell everyone that Ashley and I got frisky in the limo.

Kidding!

But I bet you that's what they'll think anyway.

_I'll hit the ceiling  
Or else I'll tear up this town_

You know what I like to tear?

Ashley's clothes off!

Do I ever!

_Now I gotta cut  
Loose, footloose  
Kick off your Sunday shoes _

Ashley likes tearing my clothes off too.

Ha!

I'm one lucky girl!

_Please, Louise  
Pull me offa my knees  
Jack, get back  
C'mon before we crack _

The solid foundation that Ashley and I have built over the last three years can't be cracked.

Aw!

I know!

We're going strong.

We're getting along.

And I love this song!

Oh my.

I'm a poet!

I could totally help Ashley with her songwriting.

Not that she needs it or anything.

_Lose your blues  
Everybody cut footloose _

I bop my head and swing my arms around as I marvel at my good fortune.

Ashley and I might have had an auspicious start to our relationship but since we've been together, things have been relatively drama free for us.

We fight of course.

And we have moments where we are completely fed up with each other.

Everyday isn't just laughing and having lots of sex.

Mind blowing, out of this world, stay in bed for hours sex.

We have plenty of those days.

On those other days though we both know that no matter what, we'll find a way to work out whatever problem we're facing.

It's hasn't been a perfect three years but perfection is so overrated.

My head shoots up when I hear Ashley clearing her throat.

She's standing in the doorway looking sexy as hell and the amused smile on her face makes me blush.

And then, I notice what she's got on.

Oh god!

I can't believe she's wearing those black leather pants of hers.

She knows what they to do me.

They make me do naughty things.

Naughty, naughty things!

Suddenly I'm feeling very warm.

That's what my girl does to me.

She does other things too but I can't think of them or we won't be heading out for the evening.

That's for sure!

Besides, I'm not done dancing and I do believe it's time to let Ashley in on the fun.

There are those two words again.

I do.

Hmmm.

Coincidence?

I think not!

I beckon her over to me with one finger and the girl has the nerve to shake her head.

How rude!

_You're playing so cool  
Obeying every rule_

She should know better than to try and resist Sexy Spencer.

It's just not possible!

I shuffle my feet over to Ashley in order to drag her to the center of the room.

She protests at first.

And it's more me dancing around her than us dancing together.

But one thing I've learned about Ashley, she can't say no to me.

Just like I predicted, soon enough she gives up the fight and lets loose.

Footloose that is.

You see what I did there?

_Dig way down in your heart  
You're burning, yearning for some_

Hell yeah I burning!

And of course I'm yearning for something else besides dancing right now.

Who am I kidding?

I yearn for her all the time.

I can't let my lust for Ashley win though.

We have places to go and things to do.

Besides each other.

We're dancing.

We're laughing.

And having a gay old time!

_Somebody to tell you  
That life ain't passing you by_

We're definitely not letting life pass us by.

Nope, not us.

I'd like to think we're a couple that seizes the moment and each other, a lot.

Yeah we are!

Ashley turns me around and when she pulls me back towards her, I stumble a bit.

I quickly regain my footing, thanks to her strong arms that never let me fall.

At one point Ashley sticks her ass out and I do the only thing that makes any sense.

I grab it!

See, I told you my ideas rock!

I can hardly breathe by the time the song finishes because I'm laughing so much.

Ashley is too.

I love moments like this one.

They're for nobody else but us.

And the fact that I can share them with Ashley now without getting horribly embarrassed makes them even sweeter.

Ashley turns the music off before coming back to take my hand.

"Are you ready to go now?" She asks like she wasn't the person holding us up.

I don't banter back.

I do something else instead.

I give her a soft kiss that she happily accepts. "You look beautiful." I tell her and it's absolutely true.

Sometimes I have to pinch myself to make sure that I'm actually living my life with Ashley.

Thankfully I never wake up when I do that.

Because I'm not living a dream…or a fairytale.

Instead, I'm able to spend my life with the most amazing person ever put on this earth.

I could be overstating just a tad but to me there's nobody better than Ashley.

Nobody.

"I don't look nearly as beautiful as you do." Ashley replies before she kisses me with so much passion and so much love that she leaves me breathless.

I love that woman!

I really, really, do!

We head out the house and into the limousine that's parked in our driveway before we get too carried away.

Ashley looks calm on the outside but I know that she's just as nervous as I am.

We cuddle in the backseat to make us both feel better and by the time we arrive at our destination, we're a lot more relaxed and a little bit more in love.

* * *

_And the nominees for Album of the Year are…_

Yay!

This is a category that I'm actually going to pay attention to.

Why you ask?

Because a certain someone that might be sitting beside me is nominated.

Yeah baby!

This isn't the first time that Ashley and I have attended the Grammy's together and she's already won a few awards but I still get excited when I hear her name called.

Or when I hear her song on the radio.

The first time I heard her song from her real debut album I nearly crashed my car because I was so blown away. My brunette beauty is one talented girl!

And her voice is to die for.

It's sexy.

It's raspy.

It's sultry.

And I better stop or I'll drag Ashley into the bathroom to relieve some of the tension I'm feeling, you know where.

We're nervous for two different reasons.

Ashley is nervous because if she wins, which she normally does, she has to get up in front of millions of people and speak.

Totally understandable.

I'm nervous because I really want her to win.

She doesn't care that much. I'm telling you that girl has not let success get to her head at all.

But for me, seeing her win is vindication.

Vindication for all those doubters who told Ashley early in her career that she wouldn't make it.

Vindication so her former record label feels like the idiots that they are for dumping Ashley when it was obvious she was going to be a huge star.

It was obvious to me.

And anyone else with a half a brain.

And finally it's vindication in the face of all those morons who write stories about Ashley and me in hopes of causing problems between us.

What people won't do to sell papers or tabloid magazines.

It's a good thing we've built a strong level of trust or those stories could really have an affect on our relationship.

But we have, so no need to fret.

I'm more confident in us than I've ever been.

And I don't in anyway think I'm jinxing things because like I've said before, we do not rely on luck to keep us together.

Love.

Love will keep us together.

And the many hours we spend on forging a strong bond that no man or woman will put asunder will keep us together as well.

I know you're probably thinking I'm talking about sex.

This time though, I'm not.

Even if I'm still a huge fan of our sex life.

Yeah, I'm getting distracted.

Bottom line, we're made for each other and nothing that's happened since Ashley showed up at my apartment on that fateful day has even come close to making me doubt her feelings for me.

Oh yeah, and seeing her win is totally hot and sexy.

Just thought I'd add that part in there because it's absolutely true.

I look over at Ashley and she's trying so hard not to look like she's going to throw up. I squeeze her hand and that makes her turn her head. "You're going to win you know and then I can collect on my bet."

Nothing beats distracting Ashley like sexual innuendo and my ability to always win.

Ha ha!

Ashley rolls her eyes, "Whatever Spence, you're going down."

Damn!

She makes my one liners so easy for me.

"But promise me, if I lose, you won't repeat what happened last year." Ashley whispers and I can tell she's not joking around.

Ok, ok, maybe she is a little because she wasn't that mad at me after what I did.

Rumor has it that I booed the person who actually won.

But you really can't believe rumors anyway.

Yeah.

Right.

"And," she continues with that same semi-serious expression on her face. "Promise me you won't repeat what you did that year when I won my first award."

Hmph!

She's taking away all my fun.

Perhaps, that year, I might have, and again this is only hear say, gotten up and screamed my head off before breaking out into a very excited cheer like Julia Roberts did in _Pretty Woman_.

Doesn't matter what I did or didn't do, Ashley loves me.

And even though I'm pouting right now she's not fazed in the slightest.

In fact, I even get a kiss for putting on such an adorable pout.

Tee hee, she can't resist my feminine wiles.

Who can blame her?

We're so busy kissing that neither one of us hears Ashley's name getting called.

That is until we're tapped on the shoulder by the person on the other side of Ashley.

We jump to our feet and then I hug Ashley because I'm so happy!

Yay!

She won!

Go Ashley go!

You da woman!

My woman!

Awesome!

Ashley lets out a few nervous giggles before she begins the requisite thanking of everyone that made her win possible.

Hey!

How come I haven't been mentioned yet?

Boo!

Hiss!

She owes me now!

And I have the best idea on how she can make things right with me.

Right when I think Ashley's done, she focuses her eyes directly on me and then I don't hear anything but her voice. "But nobody deserves more thanks than you do, Spence."

Aw!

It's swooning time.

I can just feel it!

"I've told you this so many times but I will say it again because you deserve to hear it." She continues as I reach in my purse for some tissues. I'm so going to cry! "None of this would have been possible without you coming into my life. Every morning when I wake up, regardless of where I am, I give thanks for you and all the amazing things meeting you has given me."

I was right.

Here come the tears.

Happy, joyful, I'm madly in love, tears.

"Nobody gets me like you do, nobody loves me like you do and nobody makes me happier than you do." I do believe Ms. Davies might also be tearing up. "I love you so much, Spence, and I always will."

Squeeeeeee!

I'm on such a high!

And I'm clapping and screaming because I'm all giddy inside.

Even though Ashley's words were so sweet, that doesn't mean I've forgotten about our bet.

Hell no!

She's not getting out of it again.

This bet has been two years in the making and I'm finally going to have what I've wanted for so damn long.

Right on!

* * *

I'm in the bathroom putting the finishing touches on my outfit.

God, I'm so ready to get this show on the road.

What am I wearing you ask?

Black leather pants.

That's right, my own pair, a black, tight and I do mean tight, t-shirt and black leather jacket.

I know!

Ashley's going to love it when she sees it.

Holy shit, this is going to rule the school.

When Ashley announces that she's ready, I saunter into our bedroom.

Slowly.

Sensually.

And the bugged out reaction from Ashley makes me even happier that she won.

I know her reaction is part of the act but I get the feeling it's not all pretend with her.

Ashley is also wearing those black leather pants of hers, a black t-shirt and the white letterman sweater I found at a thrift shop the other day.

I knew it was going to come in handy!

You know what else is going to come?

Me!

Very, very soon!

"Sandy!" Ashley exclaims as she stares at my chest.

This is even better than I imagined!

I take a pretend drag of the pretend cigarette that's in my hand as I smirk. "Tell me about it, stud."

Ashley starts to take the letterman sweater off right as she begins to sing. "I got chills, they're multiplying, and I'm losing control…"

I'm all for losing control.

Just like we'll be doing as soon as we perform this duet together.

I love my life!

* * *

**Footloose - Kenny Loggins (from the movie of the same name)**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N Thanks everyone for showing interest in the sequel. I'll be back tomorrow :)**

Chapter 2

"Spence, wake up."

I hear that voice, that voice I love, but I ignore it.

"Spence, I know you're not sleeping."

I screw my eyes shut even tighter than they were a second ago. I'm way too comfortable and so completely worn out by last night that I don't want to get up.

Singing and dancing can really take a lot out of a person.

Oh and sex.

I can't forget about the totally orgasmic, post-Grammy, celebrate-our-love sex that Ashley and I had.

I'd go on about how awesome it was but I'm too sleepy. You'll have to use your imagination.

Sorry.

Maybe next time.

Then my wonderful girl decides to use another tactic to get me to open my eyes.

She kisses the side of my face.

Repeatedly.

Soft, gentle kisses that make me melt inside.

As much as I want to boast that Ashley can't resist me, the truth is, I can't resist her.

Ever.

I'm so hopelessly under her spell but I can't think of any place else I'd rather be.

I allow my need for sleep to be forgotten so I can get my need for Ashley satisfied. I know, I know, it's such a sacrifice.

"Hey there, sleepy head," Ashley says when I give in and look up at her.

And that earns me a kiss on the lips.

She gives me the best rewards!

"Why are you waking me up so early?" I whine pathetically. Then I notice that she's not under the covers and she's dressed. "And why the hell are you wearing clothes?"

Talk about rude!

Ashley chuckles as she sits up, "Because it's nearly noon and we need to buy groceries for tonight."

Damn!

I forgot about tonight.

Ashley and I are hosting a barbeque for the gang.

It's sort of a welcome home/congratulations barbeque.

Not for me and Ashley but I'll get to that later.

I stick out my bottom lip and try to look as cute as possible. "But I don't want to go grocery shopping."

Ashley shakes her head but she's smiling at my adorableness. "I figured as much so I'm going to go without you."

Aw!

She's awesome!

And now I'm confused.

"So, why did you wake me up?" I ask.

"Because you can't stay in bed all day," she meanly explains. "At least not when I'm not there to enjoy you naked."

How can I fault her for logic like that?

"And I thought you could get started on making a few of the appetizers while I'm gone." Ashley suggests and I guess I have to be a good hostess. "I'll make it up to you later."

I know that tone.

I love that tone.

I can't say no to that tone.

"Fine," I fake huff. "But I'm going to hold you to that promise."

Ashley leans in and kisses me again.

Sigh.

She really knows how to shut me up.

"I love you," she says before getting off the bed.

I'll give her a free pass this time by not jeering her departure.

"I love you more," I call out as she walks away. "Drive safe."

Ashley turns around to grace me with one of her lovely nose crinkle smiles. "Always do."

She's not lying.

Well, that's mostly accurate.

Miracle of miracles, Ashley did actually learn to drive.

Aiden taught her.

I'm sorry, there's only so much damage to the Spencermobile that I can handle. Besides, I think if I continued to be the one who was responsible for giving Ashley driving lessons our relationship would have had some serious issues.

The girl doesn't know how to take orders from me.

At least she's not like that in the bedroom.

Oh.

Yeah.

I happily turned the job over to Aiden and he was, from what I heard, a very good teacher.

I'm not even offended by that statement.

Then Ashley went out and bought a sweet ass Porsche in an attempt to make me jealous.

Please!

Nothing beats my ride!

Nothing.

I do actually contemplate falling back asleep once Ashley's out the door but I decide to get some breakfast instead.

Or lunch as it may be.

After I take a nice, hot, long shower to wake myself up properly.

No, I didn't take my time for _that _reason.

I broke up with Mr. Showerhead when I got together with Ashley.

He was devastated.

I'm sitting on the couch, eating cereal, in my pajamas, when the phone rings.

What?

I could have gotten dressed properly after my shower but my PJs were a much better choice. And a lot more comfortable than anything else in my wardrobe.

I think about ignoring it because I'm really into this episode of Maury Povich I'm watching.

Hey, don't judge.

It's uhm, educational.

I mute the TV and answer the phone with a mouth full of Lucky Charms. "Hello." I hope the person on the other end of the line could make that out.

"Didn't your mom ever teach you not to talk with your mouth full?" Is the response I get.

Jessie!

Oh how I've missed her!

I'm so excited to hear her voice that I nearly drop the bowl in my lap on the ground but I manage to catch it just in time. "Hey! Welcome home!"

"Thanks," she replies through a yawn. "I'd like to say it's good to be back, but that would be a gigantic lie."

"Whatever," I stretch out on the couch and get even comfortable than I already am. "You've been away for two weeks, having fun and what not, so you'll get no sympathy from me."

"Oh Spence, it's good to see you haven't changed. Once a bitch, always a bitch." Jessie teases. "I heard about Ashley's win last night. Is she around for me to say congrats?"

"Nope, she's out grocery shopping," I tell her. "But don't try and change the subject on me young lady. How was the honeymoon?"

It's official.

My best friend is a married woman.

Too bad I can't say the same thing about myself.

I know!

I can't believe it either.

Especially when I was the first one to get engaged.

Again, I'll defer that subject until such a time that I feel able to discuss it without breaking down and crying.

Ok, ok, that's not even close to the truth but it sounded good.

Right?

Jessie lets out a very naughty laugh. "Please, like I'm going to give you any details."

Ew!

Gross!

I don't want those kinds of details!

"You're an ass," I think our bantering is what I've missed most. "I meant an overall assessment of how the honeymoon was."

I can't wait to go on my honeymoon.

I've waited so long already!

Only a few more months Spence, only a few more months.

"It was fanfuckingtastic!" Jessie gloats. "And that pun was totally intended."

"I bet it was," I say while trying not to roll my eyes. "Did you even leave your hotel room?"

"Barely," Jessie sighs, but something tells me that's a happy sigh. "I think I might need a vacation from my honeymoon."

I hope Ashley gets back soon.

She seems to be taking a long time at the grocery store.

Maybe she was mobbed by fans or something because that does happen from time to time.

Mostly though, people are very friendly and they just want an autograph.

There have been a few occasions when some overaggressive fans are looking for a more of Ashley than she's ever going to give them.

Yes lady-who-tried-to-tear-Ashley's-shirt-off, I'm talking to you!

I'll call her when I'm done talking to Jessie.

"Yeah right, like my dad will let you get away with any more time off," I inform my friend. "You know what he's like about his staff having a strong work ethic."

Jessie laughs at my comment and it takes her a few minutes to calm herself down. "He kept you around for years, didn't he?"

Whoa.

That was a low blow.

And maybe a little true.

But still!

"And you call me a bitch," I snort. "I don't think it's wise for you to tease me when I'm hosting everyone for your welcome back party."

Ha!

Nothing like a little guilt to get back at Jessie.

"Many apologies, Spencer. You are so amazing for generously hosting a bash in me and my wife's honor. How can I ever repay you?"

"Ok, cranky pants, you made your point," I reply while I walk back to the kitchen to dump my bowl in the sink. "I don't know if you've spoken to Glen yet, but he couldn't make it tonight."

Thank god!

I love him, but lately he's really been getting on my nerves. I'm trying to be a supportive sister, I really am; it's not easy though when he can be such an ass.

"What are you talking about?" Jessie asks, cutting into my thoughts. "He just sent me a message saying he'll see me later at your house."

Uh oh.

She better be kidding.

Seriously.

"Tell me you're joking," I plead.

I'm really not in the mood for what might happen if she's being truthful.

Shit!

"I'm not," Jessie says and she sounds confused.

"Fuck!" I exclaim and for once I'm not being over dramatic. "He called me two days ago and said he had other plans. And of course you know what that means."

I hear my friend sigh.

I think I do too.

And this time it's not a happy one by either one of us.

"That you invited Aiden," Jessie replies.

"Bingo."

I bet you Glen did this on purpose. Ever since he broke up with Aiden, and in turn broke his heart, he's been so unlike himself. I've tried talking to him about it but he won't open up to me.

Or Jessie.

I'll never forget the night Aiden showed up on Ashley's and my doorstep.

He was crying and looked so sad.

I still have trouble believing that they're not together anymore.

I really thought they were meant to be. Actually, I still think that but my brother has inherited the stubborn Carlin gene and he's got a bad case of pride going on.

The first time they started having major issues was when Aiden proposed to Glen. You'd think my brother would have been happy. He wasn't. Apparently Glen doesn't like the idea of marriage, which seems odd for him. His reasoning is that you shouldn't need a piece of paper to prove you're committed to someone.

I see his point to an extent.

But breaking up with a guy you're madly in love with seems extreme.

Right?

Well, they didn't break up right away, I should be clear about that. It just caused a rift between them that got bigger with time.

Personally, I think Glen has some commitment issues he's not facing. I can't say that though because he didn't ask for my opinion.

Ok, ok, I told him off when I saw him after what he had done because he's an idiot.

I got a door slammed in my face for being a good sister.

It's a shame how nobody practices good manners these days.

Needless to say their break up wasn't pretty and while my brother is family, I can't help but feel really bad for Aiden.

Ashley had some choice words about Glen's behavior. I honestly thought she was going to beat him up at one point.

Not that I blame her but Glen's my brother and I still feel the need to stick up for him. Even when he's a world class jerk.

We argued about what happened for awhile until we both came to our senses. There was no way we were going to let their issues become ours.

The problem is, Glen and Aiden aren't even close or ready to being able to be in the same room with each other. Aiden's heart is still broken and Glen is acting like he doesn't care.

Men!

He so cares and I've even spoken to Aiden about not giving up. But he won't listen to my wise words of advice and he won't bend on his stance that he wants to marry Glen. Apparently he does need that piece of paper.

My parents tried reasoning with my brother but they had just about as much luck as I did.

Back to the present though, we have a gigantic fire to put out.

I can't call Glen and tell him not to come.

I can't call Aiden and uninvited him either.

What the hell am I supposed to do?

And where the hell is Ashley?

She's been gone almost two hours.

How fucking long does it take to buy a few groceries?

It's not my fault if I sound bitchy. Blame my brother for changing his mind at the last minute. And he hasn't even called me to tell me he's coming.

I do believe I'm growling right now.

Oops!

I just realized I didn't make any appetizers while Ashley has been busy shopping.

I'm going to be in such trouble!

But that's ok, trouble is my middle name.

It's not actually my middle name, that was a joke.

I never said it was a good one.

What am I even going on about?

I hang up with Jessie after she promises to come over early to help set up for tonight.

What?

Just because she'll be a guest of honor doesn't mean she can't help.

Not to mention Melissa is off running some errands so she's bored.

So I have the appetizer issue solved but I'm no closer to figuring out what to do about the Glen/Aiden fiasco.

"Lucy, I'm home!" Ashley yells as she walks through the front door.

Now is not the time for any kind of weird role playing.

Who is Lucy anyway?

I run over to Ashley and I'm fairly certain I look panicked.

"What's wrong?" she asks when she sees how frantic I am.

"Houston, we have a problem," I reply somberly.

A big one.

And I'm not really sure what we're going to do about it.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

I got yelled at.

By Ashley.

Oh the humanity!

She said I scared the hell out of her when I accosted her at the door. Something about thinking someone was dead or hurt.

And they call me dramatic!

I explained the whole Glen coming/Aiden is also coming situation to her.

And right now, I'm waiting for her reaction.

"I'm not calling Aiden and telling him he's not invited anymore," Ashley announces, and she looks like she thinks I'm going to snap at her.

I nod my head to show her I'm not about to do anything remotely like that. "I'm not saying you should, but I don't know what to do. If the two of them are here-together-it could get ugly."

Not to mention I'm pretty sure the whole group of us will get roped into taking sides.

All I want is a fun, relaxing night with my friends and family.

Is that too much to ask for?

"Then call Glen," Ashley says like it's that simple.

It so isn't!

"Ash, I can't," I reply and it almost comes out as a whine. "He's my brother, and he's going to throw a hissy fit if I make that call."

That hissy fit will be so loud Sarah Palin will be able to hear it from her house!

"Well it's not fair to Aiden if we take back our invitation," Ashley counters. You know, even when we're disagreeing, I notice how beautiful she is. "He already feels like crap because of the break up, and he misses hanging out with everybody."

I'm going to smack Glen upside the head when I see him.

Hard!

"Besides, Glen's the one who told us he had plans. It's not fair for him to change his mind at the last minute," Ashley finishes, and I can't say I see any fault in her logic.

"You're right," I admit, but Ashley doesn't appear particularly happy because it's not the kind of right that makes a person feel good. I know she's really worried about Aiden. "I'll let Glen know he can come over another time."

Pray for me.

My eardrum might not survive the shrill response I will get from my brother.

"Thank you," Ashley pecks my lips before she pushes herself off the wall. "I know this isn't the greatest situation for you to be in either."

"Yeah, this basically sucks for both us," I attempt to get another kiss from Ashley but I'm denied.

What's up with that?

"Help me with the groceries, and then you can go change out of your pajamas and actually do some work this afternoon." Ashley is grinning widely, and I'm happy she's not letting my news bring her mood down.

"Bossy, bossy," I smirk in hopes of pushing her buttons.

You know which buttons I mean!

Then Ashley does the unthinkable.

She smacks my ass.

My ass!

Ok, ok, it's not really the unthinkable, but it's probably not appropriate to do with our front door open.

We do have neighbors.

And the paparazzi come by from time to time.

That picture is not something I want splashed across every tabloid in the country.

I'd rather save those for my private collection.

"Get moving, woman!" Ashley orders, and I must confess it turns me on a little bit.

Or a lot.

Yeah it does!

I jump out of the way of my next attack just in time to smack my head against the wall I didn't see coming.

Ow!

I hope that doesn't leave a mark.

Ashley apologies profusely and my minor injury is enough for her to offer to get all the groceries out of the car on her own.

Yay!

I knew my clumsiness would come in handy one day.

I feel my forehead to make sure no bump is forthcoming, and thankfully, I don't think there will be one.

Yay again!

Now if only I could convince Ashley to be the one who phones Glen then my lucky streak would be complete.

Speaking of a lucky streak, it seems Ashley is done bringing in the groceries.

Maybe she can come upstairs and "help" me pick out an outfit to wear today.

I'm just about to share my amazing suggestion with her when my mom calls to congratulate Ashley for her Grammy win.

Oh well.

I guess I'll have to go upstairs alone.

Hmmmm.

If we finish all the prep work early I'm sure I can convince Ashley to have a pre-party celebration with just me.

It's really hard being this brilliant sometimes.

Really hard!

* * *

Apparently I'm not as brilliant as I thought.

Shocking!

I forgot about Jessie arriving early and that threw a giant wrench into my seduce-Ashley-into-having-a-private-party-before-the-acutal-party plan.

Wow, that was a mouthful.

After the requisite squealing and hugging that accompanied Jessie's arrival, it was time for us to get down to some serious work.

No, really.

I'm not kidding.

Jessie's chopping up some salad, Ashley is getting the food prepped for barbequing and I'm sitting at the kitchen table trying to figure out the seating arrangements for tonight.

What?

That is hard work.

Whatever.

Glen hasn't answered one of my texts or messages and I'm thinking he's avoiding my calls.

Aiden is nowhere to be found either.

It would seem that a meeting between the two is inevitable

"Oh my god!" I exclaim when I'm hit with another moment of brilliance. Jessie and Ashley stop what they're doing to find out why I'm so excitable. "What if Aiden and Glen are together and that's why we can't reach them?"

I can't believe I didn't think of that before.

"They probably want to surprise us with the good news," I'm smiling, but Ashley and Jessie aren't.

I wonder why.

"I really don't think that's the case, Spence," Ashley says as she joins me at the table. "Aiden told me that Glen came by the other day when he wasn't home and took the rest of his stuff."

Oh.

There goes that theory.

Jessie takes a seat as well and she looks less than pleased. "Glen had a date the other night."

What?

A date?

And he didn't tell me?

"He says it went really well and he's seeing the guy again," Jessie finishes with no enthusiasm in her voice whatsoever.

"Glen is full of shit." Honestly! Who the hell is he kidding? He's in so much denial he's drowning in it.

Did that even make sense?

I don't know if that was the correct analogy.

Damn!

The stress of everything is making me go in all different directions.

Ashley smiles half heartedly. "He is but there's nothing we can do if he won't even talk to Aiden."

I nod in agreement, but I'm not that sure I actually agree with her.

Hold up.

My brain might have come up with its best idea to date!

I'm practically beaming when I'm ready to share said idea with Ashley and Jessie. "Hey guys, you know what we should do…"

"No!" They both say before I even finish my sentence.

That's not going to stop me though.

I ignore the looks I'm getting from my co-conspirators and continue. "We should figure out a way to get Aiden and Glen…"

"No!" They cut in again.

"You won't even listen to my idea," I pout.

Ashley lifts my hand up to give it a soft kiss. "I know you think we should interfere on this one, but it's not our place."

That's funny coming from her.

Who knows where we'd be without the launch of Operation Spashley?

It worked for us.

It only makes sense that it would work for Glen and Aiden.

Right?

Who's with me?

_Viva La Resistance!_

I even have the perfect name for our mission.

I know you're on the edge of your seat waiting to hear what it is.

Wait no more!

Operation True Love!

Aw!

It's doesn't have the same ring to it as Operation Spashley. But then again, what would?

Jessie is not buying into my campaign to save Glen and Aiden either. "If we try this, Spence, it won't work. You only run the risk of pushing Glen even farther away from where he needs to be than he already is." Damn her and her logical arguments. "I'm the first one to interfere if I think it will do any good." True that. "But I honestly believe it's best to stay out of it this time."

Ugh.

She's right.

Ashley's right.

I get that.

The thing is, I want everyone around me to be happy. When two people are meant to be together like my brother and Aiden, and they aren't, it makes me sad.

Is it possible that I'm turning into a softy as I get older?

Inconceivable!

Ok, ok, we all know I'm a hopeless romantic, but that doesn't mean I'm giving up hope here.

I'll just have to think of a way to get those two back together without anybody knowing what I'm doing.

I won't be intervening as much as influencing.

That sounds good.

Right?

At least that's the excuse I'll use if I get caught.

"Fine." I give in. "No more talk of Operation True Love."

My plan probably wouldn't have worked anyway. Not with a stupid name like that. I have no idea what I was thinking!

I should have called it Operation Fairy Dust.

No offense to my gay brothers-in-arms or anything.

But I'm sure if I pitched that name, Ashley and Jessie would have agreed with me.

I'm so busy with my thoughts that I don't notice Ashley get up from her chair. She walks over, places her hands on my shoulders and then she kisses the top of my head. "You guys finish getting all caught up. I'll handle everything on my own."

Aw!

You'd think I'd have gotten used to how sweet Ashley is.

I haven't.

Not even close.

The right thing for me to do here is not let Ashley do all the work.

But you know what she does?

She silences my protest with yet another kiss and then leaves Jessie and me on our own.

I watch her walk away, and I'm fairly certain I look like some love sick puppy.

The reason being Jessie is making gagging noises as I continue to gawk at Ashley.

I throw a dishtowel at her, and I'm happy to report it hits her right in the face.

Suck on that, Jessie!

"What time's Melissa getting here?" I ask in order to find out how long Jessie and I have to spend on our own.

I don't want that to come across the wrong way.

I adore Melissa.

She's a sweetheart, and it's very amusing to see my friend all mushy around her.

It's an interesting side to Jessie that I didn't know existed.

But we haven't had a lot of alone time recently, especially with her honeymoon and wedding, so I'd like to enjoy whatever time we have now.

Jessie checks her watch, and it doesn't escape my watchful eye that now she's the one looking love sick, not me. "A couple of hours."

"Excellent!" I exclaim, as I drag her with me into the living room. "Can I ask you a question?"

Jessie nods before plopping down on the couch beside me. "Go right ahead."

I tuck my feet under my legs as we both settle in for a long gab session. "Does it feel different being married?"

I can only imagine what you're thinking.

You've been engaged to the hot-as-hot-can-be Ashley Davies for two years without getting married.

Are you insane?

I ask myself that same question almost daily.

More like weekly.

Ok, ok, it pops into my head every once in awhile.

Before anyone has some crazy notion that Ashley is having commitment issues, I assure you, she's not.

Nor am I.

If Ashley had her way actually, we'd have been married a long time ago.

I'm the one that's held us up.

I know! I know! It sounds like I've lost my mind. I haven't, though; the reason I've delayed our wedding plans is because of the absolute whirlwind our life has been the last two years.

As soon as Ashley would finish one project, another one would crop up, or there'd be new tour she wanted to go out on. I supported her decisions, all of them, and when I didn't, I let her know that whatever the idea was, it wouldn't be good for her career.

When we did come home or have a break, we'd be so tired that there was no time to plan a wedding.

I'm not going to lie; I've fantasized about my wedding to Ashley a lot. And in all those fantasies the day is perfect, the décor out of this world and I'm wearing a beautiful wedding gown as I walk down the aisle.

I haven't figured out what Ashley's going to wear yet, but those are just details.

I don't want to rush it.

I don't want to look back on that day and regret not doing something.

And now with the huge break Ashley and I are just beginning, I can get the dream wedding that I've always wanted.

Minor commitments aside, Ashley is officially work free for the next six months.

Six months!

And that means I am too.

So with all that time on our hands we can both plan our wedding without worrying about anything else but making the day truly special.

I already have the most amazing person to marry.

The rest is just icing on the cake.

That's not to say I don't want to be married to Ashley already.

I do.

Oh wow, that was totally unintentional.

I'm witty without even trying.

But I'm willing to wait a few more months because marrying Ashley is worth waiting for.

And while I might pretend to be upset that we're not hitched yet, I'm grateful that I'm with someone who doesn't mind waiting either.

So there you have it; wedding mystery solved.

The only downside of our decision to have a longer engagement is the articles people write about there being trouble in paradise.

Please!

Not to sound full of myself, but I've been told that all you have to do look at Ashley and me together to see how in love we are.

We've been hounded quite a bit as of late, but, as always, we've shrugged those questions off. It doesn't matter to me or Ashley if the world thinks something is up with us.

It only matters what we think.

I've already explained where I stand on the whole issue.

And there you have it.

While I've been silently presenting arguments to make my case, Jessie has been pondering the question I asked of her. "Well, it's not really that different." She glances down at the ring on her left finger and smiles. "But there is a greater sense of security, at least for me, knowing that we've taken those vows."

That does make sense.

I can't wait to be married.

Now that I have my best friend back, and she's not distracted by her own nuptials, she can get busy helping me with mine.

"You're gonna love it, Spence," Jessie remarks with a soft smile that leaves me in no doubt that I will.

My day is coming soon.

And don't even get me started on the honeymoon I'm planning to surprise Ashley with.

Oh!

Yeah!

* * *

Melissa and Jessie are not so discretely making out in our back yard. She got here about fifteen minutes ago, and Jessie made a beeline for her.

Obvious much?

I'm only teasing.

It gave Ashley and me a great opportunity to get our own canoodling time in while we wait for our guests to arrive.

Neither one of us has been able to reach Glen or Aiden.

But Ashley's lips on my neck are making me forget all about the impending drama.

"Let's cancel the barbeque," Ashley murmurs in between kisses. "No one will get mad."

Oh god!

Her hand just went under my shirt.

I'm about two seconds away from agreeing with her when the doorbell rings.

Dagnabit!

Ashley looks about as pleased as I am for getting interrupted.

I'd console her by saying we'll pick up where we started later, but there's no need.

She knows.

Trust me, she knows.

I straighten out my clothes and fix my hair before heading for the door to find out who was inconsiderate enough to pick that exact moment to arrive at our house. "Hey, mom," I say when I answer it.

I'll let her intrusion slide considering she gave me life.

I know!

I'm a saint!

My mom hugs me and then kisses me on the cheek. "Am I the first one to get here?"

I shake my head as I close the door. "No, Jessie and Melissa are in the backyard."

Oh no!

I have to figure out how to signal them so they aren't caught with their tongues down each others throats by my mom.

She's accepting and all, but I doubt she'd appreciate the free show.

I see Ashley jog over to the sliding door in our kitchen, and I'm able to breathe easier.

Our ESP connection has only gotten stronger the more time we've spent together.

I take the bowl of fruit salad that my mom brought over. "Where's dad?"

That's odd.

I assumed they'd come at the same time.

"He's working," My mom replies, and let me tell you that I wouldn't want to be my dad right now.

Her jaw is set.

Her eyes are narrowed.

And her body language is screaming that she's pissed off.

"On a Saturday?" escapes from my mouth, and I mentally kick myself because I don't think that was the smartest thing to say.

"I'm going to get a drink," My mom says while avoiding my eyes.

Uhm.

Ok.

That was weird.

I don't have time to inquire further about why she's acting so off because the doorbell rings again.

It's Aiden.

He seems nervous.

Oh crap!

I look behind Aiden and guess just pulled into our driveway?

If you guessed Glen, you're right.

I think about yanking Aiden inside, but it's too late.

His head turns when he hears a noise behind him.

Glen gets out of the car and his eyes immediately lock with Aiden's.

Uh oh.

He's fuming.

Aiden has this expression on his face that lets me know he'd rather be anywhere but here.

And I'm standing with my mom's fruit salad in my hand with nowhere to go.

Glen marches up towards the door like a bat out of hell.

Why do I have the feeling that I'm about to see the start of World War III?


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N Thanks everyone, I'm glad you're enjoying the start to the sequel. I'll be back tomorrow! **

Chapter 4

Have you ever had a moment when you wished the ground would open up and swallow you whole?

That's how I feel right about now as Glen approaches Aiden and me.

It's like he's moving in super slow motion, except he's barreling towards us at an incredibly fast pace.

Yeah, I don't get it either.

Suddenly I'm not wishing for the ground to open up on me anymore. It's Glen that deserves to fall into a giant crater. I just know he's going to ruin tonight by creating a scene. I can only imagine the choice words he's going to have for me, and then for Aiden.

Speaking of Aiden, he has this expression on his face that makes me want to smack Glen even harder for what he did.

Look, I know that there is more to this situation than meets the eye.

I realize that the only people who really know why Aiden and Glen broke up are…Aiden and Glen.

I admit that I can be hard on my brother.

But that doesn't change how different he's been acting lately.

It also doesn't change my suspicions that he's using this new attitude of his to hide from what he's really scared of. Even though I'd love for him to open up to me, I'll take him talking to someone, anyone, so he can figure out what he really wants.

The closer Glen gets to the front door, the more on edge I feel.

I know he's going to…

Well, ok then, I was wrong.

It doesn't happen that often but I can't be right all the time.

Glen didn't yell at me.

Or Aiden.

Or throw a fit.

What he did was he blow past both of us and into the house without even acknowledging our existence.

That boy is skating on very thin ice.

Very thin ice!

"I think I should go," Aiden says, and I can hear the sadness in his voice.

I place my hand on his arm, "You don't have to go. Stay, please, you're more than welcome to."

Aiden shakes his head, "I don't think I can. Besides, all your family will be here and I'm not part of that anymore."

Stupid Glen!

Stupid heartbreaker Glen!

I hate seeing Aiden like this.

Or anyone for that matter.

"Don't be ridiculous," I assure him. "You have just as much right to be here as Glen. And I know Ashley really wants you here." I notice Aiden's resolve weakening. "We both want you here."

"Ok," He replies with a shrug.

I flash Aiden a comforting smile before leading him inside. Now all I have to do is warn my dear brother that he better be on his best behavior.

As good timing would have it, Ashley makes an appearance from the backyard.

I look over at her and let her know with my eyes that she should keep Aiden occupied so I can get to Glen first.

She nods back at me and then she leads Aiden to the basement under the guise of showing him some of the songs she's been working on.

I love that Ashley understood exactly what I was trying say to her.

We're so in sync we don't even need words to have a conversation.

No, not the band.

Never mind.

When I get outside I find my mom sitting by herself still looking angry.

I would normally ask her what's wrong but I can only deal with one crisis at a time.

Glen is with Jessie and Melissa, talking their ears off.

Speaking of ears, I grab a firm hold of my brother's and yank him to his feet.

He is not too happy with what I just did. "What the hell is your problem, Spencer? Don't you dare do that to me again!"

Oh, he's sadly mistaken if he thinks for one gosh darn second that I'm going to put up with his shit today.

Sadly mistaken!

"You listen to me, and you listen good," I begin with a few pokes to his chest. "If you even think of doing anything to make Aiden uncomfortable, I will personally kick your ass."

Glen rolls his eyes, "Whatever. I don't understand why…"

"Did I say you could talk?" I ask as I poke him a few more times. "This is my house and you will obey my rules."

Whoa.

I sounded just like my mother when I said that.

Weird!

"You are so freaking dramatic," Glen replies.

He takes a few steps backwards but I follow him. "Am I making myself clear?"

I can tell Glen wants to make a comment and possibly swear at me. Too bad for him my mother is two feet away from us. Not that it matters really…because I'd beat him down if he did.

I really am a peaceful person though.

I even attended a rally in college to promote love and tolerance.

Ok, ok, I went to impress a girl I was trying to hook up with.

And it worked!

Where was I again?

Oh yeah, threatening Glen's life.

"Yes," he huffs before taking his seat again.

"Good," I snarl and then, with one more dirty look in his direction, I head back inside.

I'm so agitated!

But at least he agreed to act normal.

Well, normal for Glen anyway.

My blood is boiling, and it's not because I see Ashley walking towards me.

"Are you ok?" she asks when she notices, I assume, my hands clenched and my body all tensed up.

I slowly exhale to release all the bad thoughts from my head.

It's time to fill them with good thoughts.

Ashley thoughts.

Ashley naked thoughts.

Ah!

Much better!

I nod my head before pecking her lips. "Yeah, I'm just fine." Now that I've dealt with my brother, my mind starts to venture towards what is up with my mom. "Where's Aiden?"

Ashley takes my hand in hers as we head back outside. "He's just in the washroom." She looks at me sideways and I can tell she's studying my face. Too bad it's not for a good reason. "Are you sure you're ok?"

"I'm good," I reply because I'm positive I'm just overreacting. "I forgot to bring out drinks for everyone. I'll meet you outside in a couple of minutes."

I think Ashley wants to question me more, but she must have decided to let it go.

Aiden emerges from the washroom and the two of them walk to our backyard together.

That's probably a good thing in case Glen decides to defy my strict and very clear instructions.

I have a problem though.

I have six drink orders to fill and only two hands.

I didn't excel at Math like Clay did, but even I know that doesn't add up right.

Oh Clay!

How I miss you!

Relax, relax, he's not dead or anything.

Touch wood!

Ew!

That's not what I meant!

It's an expression!

I'm about to enter some weird territory so I'll just go back to my original point.

Last year Clay decided to join 'Doctors without Borders'.

He's such a do-gooder!

And Chelsea went with him. It's been sort of strange not having him around.

I miss his…

He's always been there to…

He has a really good sense…

He's my brother and I love him!

But he's doing something he believes in, with the girl he loves, so I'm happy that he's happy.

I'm concentrating on getting all the drinks in order, so I don't hear anyone come up behind me.

"Hey Spencer, can I talk to you for a second?"

I'm so startled I nearly knock everything over.

Luckily I recover in time and I don't think Melissa noticed that she scared me.

"Sorry for scaring you," Melissa says as I turn around.

"Not a problem," I assure her as I put a hand over my chest. "What can I do for you?"

She looks around and then moves closer to me. "I need your help with something."

Now, the old Spencer would have panicked that she's trying to proposition me and in turn break Jessie's heart.

The new and improved Spencer is only mildly concerned that she's got sinister motives.

Hey!

I am trying!

Instead of letting my overactive mouth say something I'll be embarrassed about later, I nod my head as a signal for Melissa to go on.

"You know Jessie's birthday is in a couple of months," Melissa whispers as I begin to relax. "I was thinking of throwing her a surprise party, and I wanted to know if you would help me out."

Aw!

Melissa's such a sweetie!

Not as sweet as my Ashley though.

I mean, it's not even close!

I smile widely to let Melissa know I'm on board. "Count me in."

We all know I'm the master at pulling off surprises.

I'm also a master debater!

And I'm done.

"Awesome! Thanks!" Melissa gives me a big hug before heading back to the party.

Damn!

I forgot to ask her to take some drinks to help me out.

I know!

I'll grab a tray and carry them all at once.

What could possibly go wrong?

That reminds me of the job I had once as a waitress. I only lasted a day because…

The doorbell rings before I can finish my thought.

"Hey dad," I say when I see who it is.

"Hi sweetheart," my dad replies and he looks very tired. "It's good to see you."

"You too," We hug briefly and then I lead him towards the kitchen.

"I'm sorry I'm late. I had so much paperwork to catch up on." At least he didn't show up in a suit because then I'm sure he'd be in even more trouble than he already is. "How are things with you?"

"Mom is pissed," I tell him instead of answering the question. "And you look like you haven't slept in days."

My dad chuckles as I hand him a drink. "You always were subtle." He eyes me picking up the tray of drinks and takes it from me without me asking him to.

Aw!

How nice of him.

"And you are not telling me something," I reply as I give him my best tough guy face. "What's going on with you and mom?"

"Nothing at all," he lies.

He's definitely lying.

I have a sixth sense about these things.

When we arrive outside I see my mom, Ashley and Aiden huddled together. While Glen, Jessie and Melissa are huddled together on the other side of the table.

Great!

I hand everyone their drinks after my dad puts the tray down. As I do, I watch him try and kiss my mom hello.

She ignores him.

Sigh.

I never imagined that I'd be the one who'd be responsible for keeping the peace in this family.

He attempts another go at greeting my mom, but that doesn't go well either.

She storms inside the house, leaving us kids confused, and my dad upset.

Sigh again.

What is this world coming to?

Sheesh!

My dad follows her as I head over to Ashley.

I take a seat next to my beloved, while appearing as unconcerned as possible.

No need to alert the masses yet.

I'm sure this is just one teeny misunderstanding that will be cleared up soon enough.

Right?

Ashley smiles at me as I place my hand in hers. She somehow understands that the best thing for her to do right now is not to ask me a bunch of questions that I don't know the answer to.

And I'm grateful that she gets what I need from her.

Aiden laughs at one of Ashley's Grammy stories and that earns him a fierce look from my brother.

Oh yeah, he's completely over Aiden.

Not!

I must give the guy credit. He's doing a mighty fine job of pretending my brother isn't even here.

Something Glen wasn't counting on.

Every few seconds he breaks from his conversation with Jessie and Melissa to look over our way.

Does it make me a bad sister because I'm secretly glad he's the one that's being bothered?

I hope not.

Ashley decides that now is a good time to fire up the barbeque and Aiden offers to help her out. Personally, I think he doesn't want to risk having to speak with Glen.

But as long as he's willing to help, that's fine by me.

I think I should check to make sure we have enough hamburger buns.

What?

I am not going to find out why my parents are fighting.

I'm not!

Whatever.

I slowly slide the glass door open to avoid being detected. It's not easy being a covert operative.

I take two steps into the kitchen and then I hear them.

"I said I was sorry." My dad sounds exasperated. "What more do you want from me?"

I can't see them but I think they're down the hall near our game room.

Oh my god!

It's such a cool room.

We even have DDR!

Can you believe it!

I so kick ass at that!

"I don't want you to apologize anymore, Arthur," my mom replies, her voice raised.

Uh oh.

"I want my husband to start spending time with me," she finishes

That sounds reasonable.

Apparently my dad doesn't think so.

"That's not fair. I want to spend time with you but…"

"I'm sick of fighting with you about this," my mom cuts in. "I'm sick of having meals by myself, I'm sick of canceling plans because you can't make it and I'm so damn sick of hearing excuse after excuse from you."

Wowzers.

I rarely hear my mom swear.

To her 'damn' is a swear word.

Not good.

This is so not good.

"We're here to have a good time," my dad calmly says. "Can we discuss this later?"

I hightail it back outside because I don't want them to know I was listening to their fight.

Shit!

I don't like it when my parents argue.

I get that I'm an adult and I have my own life, but I get worried when they do.

I think it's because I hardly saw them arguing when I was a kid.

Either because they didn't or because they did it when we weren't around.

My parents reappear a minute later and even though they're smiling, I can tell things are still very tense between them.

My dad goes over to Ashley and Aiden, while my mom offers to help me set the table.

At least they're trying to act normal.

When the food is ready, all of us gather around to dig in.

I'm sitting beside Ashley.

Of course.

Aiden is on the other side of her, next to my parents. Jessie and Melissa are on the other side of me, leaving Glen next to them.

My dad says grace like he always does and right before I'm about to start eating, he stands up.

"I would like to propose a toast," he announces.

Glen is pretending to look at my dad, but he's not doing a very good job. From where I'm sitting, it seems like he's trying to get Aiden's attention.

My dad holds up his glass and then he turns towards Jessie and Melissa. "I just wanted to wish both of you a very hearty congratulations. May you have a long, happy marriage filled with love and nothing but good times."

I'll drink to that.

And I do.

I down my glass of wine in one shot and then pour myself another.

What?

I'm not driving.

I've had a stressful day and wine relaxes me.

What?

"Thank you, Arthur," Jessie replies as she glances over at her wife. "Melissa and I…"

My mom shoots out of her chair. "I'd like to propose a toast too."

Oh boy!

I have a feeling this is not going to be something I want to watch.

But I do.

"Jessie, Melissa, you know how happy I am that the two of you found each other." So far, so good. "And I just want to say that while wishing you success is nice, giving you some words of advice is even better."

I want to cover my eyes and block my ears to avoid hearing what my mom is going to say.

"I've learned that the key to a successful marriage is actually spending time with the person that you're married to." My mom gives my father a poignant look before focusing back on the couple of the hour. "I know that sounds crazy but let me tell you that if you don't, you run the risk of not having a marriage anymore."

My mom flashes Jessie and Melissa a fake smile before sitting down.

Wow.

That just made things even more awkward than they already were.

My dad is trying, unsuccessfully, to shrug the incident off.

Jessie and Melissa have no idea how they're supposed to respond to that.

Glen is glaring at Aiden now.

Ashley can't figure out what is going on.

And I just took another big sip of my wine.

I have to do something to get the day back on track.

Think, Spencer, think!

It has to be good.

It has to be a tension breaker.

It has to fix a mess I didn't create.

Gah!

This is hard!

I take yet another sip of wine for inspiration.

I know it's only four o'clock, but I'm desperate.

And starting to feel the effects of that wine.

I'll just say the first thing that comes to my mind.

That sounds like a good idea.

Right?

"Ashley had a sex dream the other night about Florence Henderson." I blurt out without even thinking.

Oh my god!

What did I just say?

Oh my god!

I hear Ashley gasp beside me. "Spencer!"

Oh my god!

That was supposed to stay in my vault!

Oh my god!

Ashley is going to kill me!

I cover my mouth with both my hands to prevent anything else that's supposed to be a secret from becoming public knowledge.

Oh my god!

"Ew!" Glens shrieks at the top of his lungs.

Thanks for your help, dumbass!

Oh my god!

My mom clears her throat and the only thing I can do is look down.

Oh my god!

"Please excuse us," Ashley grabs my hand and I'm still in shock. "Spencer and I have to go check on something."

Oh my god!

I'm about to die!

In no time, I'm inside with Ashley and scared out of my mind. "What the hell is wrong with you?" Ashley yells once the door is closed. "Seriously, tell me, Spencer. What possessed you to say that in front of everybody?"

I'm not sure if I'm supposed to answer or let her rant and rave at me some more.

Ashley is furious.

Furious!

And probably embarrassed as well.

I can't blame her.

When she told me about her dream it took every part of me not to burst out laughing.

Ok, ok, I totally did.

Can you blame me?

That's what I thought.

"How the fuck am I supposed to go out there now?" Ashley paces back and forth as she continues her justifiable tirade. "Fuck!"

"I'm really sorry," I say as sincerely as I can. "I never meant…"

Ashley will have none of that. "Would you like me to tell everyone about the time you were going down on me and sneezed?" Oh my god! "Would you?"

That is not even close to being comparable to what I did.

Not even close!

I made an honest mistake.

That would be cruel and unusual punishment.

Plus my parents are outside.

And my brother.

And I might die for real if she tells them that story.

I almost keeled over when I sneezed because I was so mortified.

It totally killed the mood by the way.

It was gross and she promised that she'd keep it a secret.

She promised!

What?

I fall to my knees because I have some serious begging to do. "I am so sorry." I tilt my head to one side. "I never meant to…"

"Stop tilting your head!" Ashley demands when I go to do it again. "That's not fair and you know you deserve to be yelled at."

Shoot!

I thought for sure it would work.

"I know I was an idiot," I keep my head perfectly straight as I plead for mercy. "A fool, a moron, a…" why isn't she stopping me? "It was a total accident. With Aiden and Glen showing up, and then my parents fighting, I got so stressed out. Please forgive me, Ash. Please!"

Ashley considers her options and then she pulls me to my feet. "You know this isn't over?" I nod my head in agreement. "And you know I don't really forgive you?" I nod again. "But I know you didn't do that on purpose."

Whew!

I'm glad she realizes that.

I move in for a kiss to test the waters, and I'm happy to report I got one.

Yay!

At least she's not taking away kisses.

I'll take that to mean she's already getting over the whole incident.

Denial can be a good thing sometimes.

I give her a few more "forgive me" kisses before we rejoin everyone.

I'm sure they've already forgotten about what I told them.

When we retake our seats nobody says a word.

Thankfully Ashley isn't blushing anymore, but she's not exactly making eye contact with anyone either.

Actually, nobody is making eye contact with anybody.

That's odd.

I went and spilled a really big secret and it didn't even lighten the mood at all.

I failed.

Big time!

The best course of action for me is to lay low. I keep my head down as I take a bite of my food.

I chance a look over at Ashley to see what she's thinking, but her face is unreadable.

It's then that my wonderful family and friends decide to make matters even worse.

"Here's the story, of a lovely lady," they sing as group. "Who was bringing up three very lovely girls…"

Oh my god!

That was funny when I did it, but now, not so much.

Oh my god!

They can't even finish because they're laughing so hard.

And Ashley's face is as bright as a tomato.

Glen starts moaning, "Oh, Mrs. Brady," much to his own amusement.

My mom tells him to stop but she's hard to understand because she's laughing hysterically.

I see my dad catch her eye and then he places his hand over hers.

She doesn't pull away.

Aiden and Glen even manage to exchange a smile.

I'm about to bask in my glory when Ashley leans over so only I can hear her. "Later, when everybody is gone, I will get my revenge."

Oh no!

I turn my head to see what she's thinking and I nearly choke on my food.

Oh yes!

I've been a very bad girl!

Very bad!

I can't wait for Ashley to exact some revenge on me.

All night long!

There's only one problem.

We have a house full of guests and hours to go before they're going to leave.

Damn it!

Why oh why do I have such bad luck?


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N I might not have a chance to update tomorrow and if I don't, I'll double update on Sunday. Hopefully that won't happen. Enjoy and have a happy Friday :)**

Chapter 5

"How much trouble are you in?" Jessie asks as she watches me clean dishes without even offering to help.

That's very inconsiderate of her.

Just kidding.

Mostly.

"I have no idea what you are referring to," I lie.

I know exactly what she's referring to.

Exactly!

It would seem my posse…I said posse, minds out of the gutter please. As I was saying, my posse decided they were hysterically funny by bringing up Brady Bunch references throughout our meal.

I know!

They really need a good talking to.

Because as much as Ashley hinted at her own special variety of "revenge," I'm worried that she'll change her mind the more embarrassed she gets.

She keeps looking my way and shaking her head at me every time they do something.

I guess when the gang clears out I'll have to get on my knees.

To beg!

Wow!

And people think I have a dirty mind.

Ok, ok, I totally do but that's not my point.

My point is…I can't remember my stupid point.

I'm too nervous to remember.

I shoot Jessie a dirty look, "Well that depends on how many times you idiots are going to sing that damn song."

Jessie slaps me on the back a couple of times, "No need to thanks us; you're most welcome."

Oh, she thinks she's so damn funny.

I could blame myself for that slip of the tongue.

I could, but I choose not to.

"This is the last time I throw any kind of shindig in your honor," I grumble loud enough for my so-called friend to hear.

"Aw, Spencey, don't be like that," Jessie smirks. "You know I love you to bits."

Whatever.

She's in my bad books now.

As is everybody else in attendance.

On the plus side, my parents seem to be over their fight.

But Glen and Aiden aren't talking at all.

I suppose its progress that Glen isn't being a complete ass anymore.

You can't stop progress!

I'll have to be satisfied with baby steps.

With all the drama surrounding my vault opening, I haven't even begun to think of a plan to get those two boys back together.

I must act soon or there won't be anything left to save.

It's too bad I'm going to be working this mission solo. It would be a lot easier to succeed if I had some back up.

Maybe I can recruit Ashley to my side once I'm done making things up to her.

I can't wait for next year!

That's how long it's going to take Ashley to forgive me.

Maybe longer.

"There's a chance I might love you as well," I reply with a patented "Spencer Carlin Pout".

Jessie rolls her eyes," You know that pout doesn't work on me anymore." I pout even more to prove that it does. "Damn, woman, that's not fair."

I grin in triumph. "Who said anything about me playing fair?" I finish the last of the dishes, and I'm happy because my fingers were getting pruny. "Are you and Melissa still coming over tomorrow?"

"We certainly are," Jessie assures me. "I'm not one to pass up another free meal."

I go to smack Jessie with the dishtowel in my hand, but I miss. Today is just not my day.

Normally, if Glen wasn't such a fucking moron, he'd be invited over with Aiden as well. The six of us used to alternate abodes every Sunday night to watch movies, play board games or just hang out.

Then my brother ruined everything.

Typical.

The four of us really don't want to take sides by inviting Glen over Aiden, or vice versa.

If you ask me, Aiden shouldn't be punished for Glen breaking up with him. It doesn't really matter if we decided to take his side though. He confessed to Ashley that he'd feel like a fifth wheel if he tagged along.

I understand where he's coming from, but I miss the fun times all of used to have when we got together.

Not to mention that Ashley and I were so kick ass at all the different games we used to play.

I think a lot of people would be surprised to learn that Ms. Rock Star is a fierce Boggle champion. I'm good too, but not as good as her.

I'll never admit that to her.

Never!

Good thing we play as a team because I would hate to have our competitive nature be something we fight over.

While my mind is trying to think of a witty comeback to sass my friend with, Melissa walks by. She doesn't say anything to Jessie, but that doesn't stop Ms. James from forgetting all about me. Her eyes zoom in on her wife, and she gets the sweetest expression on her face that makes me smile.

"You are such a goner," I remark when Jessie decides I'm worthy of looking at again.

She doesn't deny the truth of what I just said.

"Yeah I am," she freely admits. "And you're partly responsible for that."

What?

Moi?

What did I do?

I'm someone who doesn't hesitate to take credit for anything, but I'm not sure what Jessie means exactly.

Jessie doesn't wait for me to question her to explain what's on her mind. "I used to watch you and Ashley interact, and it made me want to have that with someone one day."

Aw!

She's sweetness personified.

"And now I do," She finishes with a big smile.

Jessie is distracted by her love for Melissa, so I'm able to snap the dishtowel at her with ease.

Ha!

I win!

"I can't believe what a mush ball you've turned into," I tease.

I don't think anyone is as big a mush ball about their partner as I am.

That's not my competitive side coming out.

Honest.

I'm merely stating the facts as I see them.

"Whatever, Carlin," Jessie replies like she's offended, but I can tell she isn't. "This coming from the Queen of mushiness."

I respond the only way that seems appropriate.

I stick my tongue out and pull a face.

I'm a class act.

Jessie chuckles, "Real mature, Spence, real mature." She steals a grape from the fruit salad that I'm getting ready to serve, and let me tell you she's lucky my mom didn't see that. "Enough about me, when are we going to start planning your wedding?"

I need to pause for a second.

My wedding.

My wedding to Ashley.

My wedding to the love of my life.

Aw!

I'm starting to get excited and we haven't even done anything yet.

We don't have a ton of time to plan, but I'm confident with Jessie's help, our wedding will come together quite nicely.

"Monday night, at eighteen hundred hours, report to my house, and I'll assign some duties to you," I inform Jessie.

She shakes her head, "You really are a strange one, Spence."

I'm too over the moon about my upcoming nuptials to be offended by that insult.

I'll pour salt in Jessie's drink later to exact my revenge.

I hand Jessie the fruit salad. "Do something useful with yourself and take that outside. I'll be there in a minute."

I'm almost positive I hear Jessie call me bossy under her breath.

At least she followed my orders.

I grab a stack of paper plates before I make a move to get back to the barbeque too.

What?

They might not be classy, but they're a breeze to clean up.

I don't get a chance to take one step because Ashley keeps me in place by wrapping her arms around my stomach.

"You've been very naughty," Ashley whispers in my ear.

Hell yeah I have!

I'm frozen.

Literally.

As my whole body reacts to the hotness that is my fiancé.

My whole body!

Every inch of me is on fire.

Every.

Inch.

Ashley pushes one of her hands under my shirt, and I'm too aroused to care that somebody might walk in on us.

I'm going to trust she's already made sure that the coast is clear.

Her fingers stroke my stomach as her lips kiss any exposed skin she can find on my neck.

Good lord!

I want to be taken.

Right here.

Right now.

Guests be damned!

"Is this turning you on?" Ashley asks before she starts nibbling on my ear.

Oh god!

Do I even need to answer that question?

Ashley's fingers press into my skin harder than they were a second ago. "Is it?"

I guess I do.

"Uh…uh…" That's all I manage to get out because the answer is yes.

Oh yes!

Hell yes!

Fuck yes!

Yes!

Yes!

Yes!

I moan louder than I want to when Ashley's other hand goes to the inside of my thigh.

Fuck me!

Please!

Why am I not saying this to her?

"Don't forget to bring napkins when you come back outside," Ashley whispers in that sexy, husky way like only she can.

And then she leaves.

Me.

Just like that!

Without finishing what she started!

Alone!

I hear her laughing on the way to the backyard.

Fuck!

I can't believe she did that!

How in the world am I supposed to face my family and friends in my current state?

How in the world am I supposed to show enough self restraint to control my urge to yank Ashley upstairs and have her fuck me senseless?

How in the world am I supposed to even walk right now?

Fuck!

I take it back.

Ashley's idea of revenge sucks!

So bad!

And it doesn't even involve the right kind of sucking!

Damn you, Ashley Davies!

Damn you!

What she did is torturous.

Boo!

Hiss!

I'm horny, and I can't do anything about it.

My hands are shaking.

My insides quivering.

And I'm no closer to figuring out a way to calm myself down.

I shut my eyes to see if that helps.

It doesn't.

All I see are x-rated images that make me even more flustered.

Oh god!

She's such a tease!

I end up doing math in my head to solve my very hot problem.

At first it didn't work because every answer I came up with was sixty-nine.

But then the infinitely small part of my brain that isn't obsessed with Ashley took over, and I was able to get all dirty thoughts out of my head.

Ok, ok, not all of them, but enough that I'm heading outside as I speak.

"What took you so long?" Ashley inquires when I sit back down.

Then she winks.

Winks!

And that's followed by more laughter.

Just you wait, Ashley.

Just you wait!

I had no idea she could be so cruel.

Perhaps I should reconsider getting married to her.

Kidding!

Totally kidding!

One hundred percent kidding!

Even if she's the meanest person on the planet, I still love her with all my heart.

She's lucky I do, or I'd throw her in the pool to get her back.

Whoa.

That's a brilliant idea!

I get sidetracked from my brilliance when I spy my mom and dad giving each other a quick peck on the lips.

Aw!

I'm not even grossed out because I'm happy they're acting like themselves again.

That makes me feel such a sense of relief I'm going to give Ashley a reprieve from my pushing-her-in-the-pool plan.

I don't want to be misunderstood.

I will make her wet later.

Yeah I will!

And now I'm all ready to start serving dessert.

"Why should I be quiet?" Glen asks in a voice that is a lot louder than necessary.

Uh oh.

What is he up to?

I see Jessie frantically gesturing with her hands, but my brother is choosing to ignore her.

"It's not my fault that I had the most amazing date the other night," he continues, much to my horror and everybody else's.

I can't react quick enough to stop him from opening his big fat fucking mouth again.

Glen gets this really smug look on his face that I want to smack away. "He was so hot and I can't wait to see him again tonight."

A deafening silence falls over the table.

I'm pretty sure my mouth is hanging open.

He's not even trying to hurt me, but I feel a deep pang in my chest for Aiden.

It feels like the air has been sucked out of my lungs.

I don't know if I should kill Glen first or check on Aiden to see if he's ok.

Aiden makes my decision for me.

He pushes his chair back so fast it makes a very loud noise.

My head turns in his direction, and when I see the expression on his face I almost cry.

He looks like someone just punched him in the stomach and then ripped his insides out.

And that someone is Glen.

Aiden doesn't say a word.

He walks back inside and out the door, I assume, without acknowledging anyone.

Not that I blame him whatsoever.

Ashley jumps to her feet, drawing my attention to her, and I think she's also facing the dilemma of physically hurting Glen or checking on Aiden.

She does the latter, but not before giving Glen a look that leaves nobody doubting how much she wants to kill him.

Get in line, Ashley.

Get in line!

"Was it something I said?" Glen snickers.

It's so hard for me to even breathe right now.

I can't remember the last time I've felt this mad.

Or upset.

"Who the hell are you?" I bark out at Glen before any sort of rational thoughts take over. He tries to talk but I'm not about to let him. "Seriously, Glen, who the hell are you?"

"Stay out of this," Glen orders getting defensive.

Fuck that!

I shake my head to let him know he's not about to get a free pass from me. "I won't. Not until you explain why you've turned into a gigantic asshole."

I don't care one single bit that my parents are here.

I'm not censoring myself.

And if they know what's good for them, they won't even think of telling me to watch my language.

"You know, if Aiden was the one to break up with you, then maybe I'd understand you acting like a complete jerk." I continue without letting Glen get a word. "But he didn't. You're the one who ended things and yet you're the one behaving like you've been wronged."

Glen stands up and we're glaring at each other. "None of this is your business."

"It is," I insist, and I'm so mad I don't hear Ashley come up behind me. I do feel her hand on my shoulder, but I don't turn around. "When you do that kind of thing in my house."

I hate fighting with anyone.

Especially when I'm fighting with someone I love.

Even Glen.

I don't like him very much at this moment, but I still love him.

And I can't even fathom why he's changed into this person I hardly recognize.

"Shut up," Glen hisses.

"I'll do no such thing," I reply. "You know, I was stupid enough to think that you deserved another chance with Aiden. I was even planning different ways to make that happen, but I've changed my mind." Have I ever! "You don't deserve Aiden; he could do so much better than you."

"Got to hell!" Glen yells in response.

My throat closes up as I make a decision. "Get out."

Glen is a bigger idiot than I thought because he doesn't seem to understand English. "What?"

"Get out of my house, and don't let the door hit your ass on the way out," I shout, my emotions getting the best of me.

For a second it seems like Glen is going to stay and fight with me some more.

Nobody else is saying anything while we wait for my brother to react.

Thankfully I don't need to tell him again that he's not welcome in my home right now.

He stomps his way out the house, and I'm not even happy to see him go.

I'm not happy about anything this second.

Maybe I overreacted.

Maybe I shouldn't have kicked him out.

Maybe I'm getting upset over something that isn't about me.

But I am upset, and there's nothing I can do to change that.

Seeing Glen behaving this way when he used to be so sweet to Aiden strikes a nerve within me.

Deep down.

And it brings out a fear of mine that most days I ignore.

I can't ignore that fear right now.

Ashley moves in front of me and when I see the look of concern and love in her eyes, I can't hold it together any longer.

Her arms are around me in no time at all, and I breakdown in them.

I get from Ashley exactly what I need.

Support and comfort.

Like only she can give.


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N I guess I am able to update today seeing as I'm up too early on a Saturday! Thanks as always to those of you who leave feedback, I do appreciate it. **

Chapter 6

"I'm sorry," I say to my parents and Melissa and Jessie when I stop crying.

I feel bad for my outburst.

Not for what I said.

Hell no!

But I created a scene, and I probably made them uncomfortable.

Ashley's holding me close, and I love her so much for that.

I love her so much it can be overwhelming at times.

Now though, now, I need for her to take my bad feelings away.

I know it's not fair to put that on her, but it's what I need.

She kisses my temple and runs her hand up and down my arm.

She's so good to me.

She's so loving.

She's so caring.

She's so damn wonderful.

I often wonder what I did right in my life to deserve her.

To deserve this amazing woman that loves me like she does.

To have someone that makes me feel all the time that I'm the most important person in her life.

That makes me feel safe and secure.

That makes me feel special.

That makes me feel cared for.

That makes me feel that no matter what bad things might come our way, we'll weather that storm; because we'll face it together.

That makes me feel so unbelievably grateful she's in my life.

I might act unreasonable when I'm in a cranky mood.

I might make mistakes.

I might have days where I yell at Ashley or we get in a fight over nothing.

I might hurt her unintentionally when my mouth gets away from me.

I might do a lot of things, but there's one thing I don't do.

And that's take her for granted.

I made a promise to myself not to do that, and so far, I've been able to keep it.

How could I ever take someone like Ashley for granted anyway?

I can act like an idiot on the rarest of occasions, but I'm no dummy.

I waited a long time for Ashley to come into my life, and now that I have her, I'll do whatever it takes to make sure she never goes away.

I realize there are some circumstances that I cannot control.

I realize I have no way of knowing what's around the corner.

I realize that life throws curveballs at you when you least expect it.

I realize all those things, but I also recognize that worrying about all of that will do me not good.

That's not to say I'm able to do push those thoughts out of my overactive mind.

Most days I can.

But not today.

And not right now.

I look into Ashley's eyes, and I can tell she's worried about me.

I can tell she's thinking of some way to cheer me up.

I can tell that she's hurting because I am.

Ashley understands me like so few people do.

I'd like to think I understand what makes her tick as well.

And that's why we make a great team.

"You don't have to apologize, Spence," my mom replies, the concern in her voice evident. "You didn't do anything wrong."

That's a relief.

A small part of me was worried that she'd be mad at me for tearing Glen a new one.

She turns to my dad and says, "I think it's time we had a little chat with our son."

"I think you're right," he concurs.

As much as I really can't stand Glen right now, I am concerned about him.

A lot actually.

He's clearly not dealing with something, and clearly, I'm not the person he wants to open up to about whatever that something is.

I really hope my parents can talk or kick some sense into that thick skull of his.

They hug me before they leave, and then I'm right back beside Ashley.

She's holding me like she never wants to let go.

And that's completely fine with me

Because I don't want her to.

Ever.

"Sorry guys," I say to Jessie and Melissa. This was supposed to be a day for them, not a day to have a blowout with my brother.

"Stop apologizing," Jessie replies as Melissa nods. "Glen is the one who acted like a complete jerk. I can't believe him."

Me either!

"How's Aiden?" I ask Ashley.

She gets an angry look on her face. "How do you think he is?" There's a biting tone to her response that I didn't expect. "Sorry, none of this is your fault," she apologizes quickly and I'm not mad. I'd be pissed too if Glen was the one being hurt instead of the other way around. "I just…"

"I know," I say before I give her a kiss.

Melissa looks over at Jessie. "Maybe we should be going as well." Then her eyes come back over to me. "We'll help you clean up first."

"That's ok," I assure her. "You guys don't have to leave. I mean, we have all this fruit salad, and it is your party."

I want to be alone with Ashley, but I'm not about to kick my friends out.

I think one rude Carlin is enough for today.

They deserve an attempt to salvage the barbeque.

"We'll eat it tomorrow night." Jessie takes Melissa's hand as they both stand up. "Besides we're still a bit jet lagged from our trip, so an early night won't be such a bad thing."

Melissa smiles at me. "Thanks for everything; you guys really didn't have to fuss over us."

"And don't expect that we're going to return the favor after you get married," Jessie jokes. Unfortunately for my friend, that comment earns here a slap on the shoulder from her wife. "Hey!" she exclaims as she rubs her "wound".

"That'll teach you a lesson the next time you want to be a smartass," Melissa replies with a look that says, "I dare you to challenge me."

Jessie doesn't.

Because she knows what's good for her.

Whipped!

"Yes dear," Jessie replies, confirming once and for all that she's completely at Melissa's mercy.

But you know, I don't think she minds one bit.

When we're on our way inside, Jessie tells Melissa and Ashley that she has a work related question for me.

I'm pretty sure they don't believe her either, but they go ahead without questioning her motives.

"Are you ok?" Jessie asks once we're alone.

"Yeah," I reply even though we both know that answer isn't true. There's really only one person who I want to talk to about what's bugging me. I appreciate Jessie's offer, but Ashley is who need to open up to. She's the only one who will be able to alleviate my anxiety. I hope. "I overreacted, that's all."

Jessie knows me better than that, "You don't have to tell me what's wrong, but I'm always around if you want to unload on someone."

How lucky am I to have to Jessie?

So damn lucky.

I wasn't sure if our friendship would remain strong after I met Ashley and she met Melissa. I'm on the road so much and she's taken on more responsibilities at my dad's company. Just like my relationship with Ashley, my friendship with Jessie is not something I take for granted.

And we always make sure we make time for each other.

Watching her marry the love of her life meant a lot to me.

Seeing her happy and cared for gives me such a sense of satisfaction.

"Thanks," I say as we embrace.

Jessie takes my hand one we pull apart. "You know I'm going to kick Glen's ass when I see him on Monday."

"I know," I laugh, and it's genuine. "Give him an extra punch for me."

"Now that is not going to be a problem," Jessie replies before we head back to our women.

If Glen wasn't such a jerk I'd feel sorry for him.

He's incurred the wrath of Jessie James.

She's one tough _hombre _and I think he's about to regret the day he was born.

As he should!

Ass!

* * *

I'm waiting for Ashley to get out the shower.

I know!

I should be in there with her, but I'm not.

After Jessie and Melissa left we decided to watch a movie.

Actually, Ashley decided.

I think she could sense that I wanted to talk to her, but I wasn't quite up to it yet.

She even let me pick the movie.

That says a lot about her considering I chose _The Sound of Music_.

She didn't complain once.

Or make fun of me like she sometimes does when I sing along.

What she did instead was let me rest my head on her lap so I could snuggle up to her.

That's love!

That's how much I must mean to her.

I heard her say to Aiden once when she thought I wasn't around that it ranks as one of her worst movies ever.

See!

She's so good to me!

God!

I can't believe her sometimes.

And I mean that in the best way possible.

She tried to clean up after the barbeque on her own, but I wouldn't let her. I might be upset, but that doesn't mean I'm going to take advantage of her.

I do like to do that.

And she likes when I do that.

That's not what I mean though.

"Wow, it must be bad if you're wearing those," Ashley remarks as she comes out of the bathroom wearing a tank top and boy shorts.

There was no real need to reveal that information, but I felt compelled to.

You're welcome!

She's referring to my pajamas by the way.

On most days the only thing I wear to bed is a smile, but when I'm not feeling well or in a sucky mood, I put on clothes.

I've got on my Eyeore pajamas.

Just like him, I need a hug.

I shrug my shoulders, sort of pathetically, in response.

I'm sitting on the edge of our bed while she puts her clothes away.

When she's done, she's kneels in front of me and then kisses my forehead. "Are you up for talking time now?"

I nod my head and give her a small smile because she's too cute for words.

"Hold that thought," she says before disappearing.

I wonder where she went.

When Ashley returns I get my answer.

She's holding two bowls in her hand, and I don't need to see inside to know what she brought me.

Ice cream.

My ultimate comfort food.

She even put chocolate syrup and sprinkles on, just like I like it.

It may not sound like much, but it means a lot to me.

I almost cry after she hands me my bowl.

"I love you, Ash," I tell her once we move so we're sitting cross legged across from each other.

Ashley smiles sweetly. "I love you too."

I mush my ice cream around to ensure I get a taste of chocolate syrup with every bite I take.

I'm not exactly sure how to tell Ashley why I cried.

It's not that I don't know what's bothering me; I'm not sure how to frame what's on my mind without upsetting her.

I love Ashley more than anything.

And I trust her completely.

I really do.

She's exceeded every expectation I've had of her these past three years.

And then some.

But that doesn't stop the doubt I feel sometimes.

I don't doubt Ashley.

I don't doubt our relationship.

The doubts I have are different.

I look at Glen and Aiden.

A couple meant for each other.

A couple very much in love.

A couple that I thought would last forever.

And they didn't.

Look at them know.

Look at how Glen has changed.

Couples split all the time.

All the time.

What if Ashley changes?

What if I do?

What if…

I don't even want to say.

Because it's not fair to Ashley; it really isn't.

This is my fear and has very little to do with her.

I thought I knew someone once, and I was wrong.

Dead wrong.

For all my boasting about how things are with Ashley, there are days where I get scared that it will all be taken away from me.

That she will turn into a person I don't recognize.

And then what would I do?

I like to think I've changed, in a good way, and I have, but in some ways I'm exactly the same.

I project this over confidence in regards to my relationship, masking the fear that lies underneath.

At least I can recognize that, I suppose.

Does that even matter?

It's a two-way street.

I wasn't exactly the best at relationships before.

What if I run when things get tough?

What if I bail on her?

The thing is we've never really been tested.

Sure, we've had moments and incidents we've gone through.

But like I said earlier, our life together has been relatively drama free since the turbulence that plagued us at the beginning.

Neither one of us handled that particularly well.

I know I shouldn't run my life based on the unknown.

I try really hard not to.

But I have my days.

And my moments.

Like right now.

Tomorrow, while only a day away, can also be a scary thing.

I don't even know if I'm making sense.

I must be to Ashley because she nods as I let out my worries.

By the time I'm done rambling, and eating my ice cream, I do feel better.

A little unsure of her reaction mind you but relieved to get it off my chest.

Ashley takes my bowl from me and then takes both my hands in hers. "I'm glad I'm not the only one feeling like that."

I'm sure she can see the surprise register on my face. "You're scared too?"

"Absolutely," Ashley confirms as she draws me into her. "I worry that something can happen to us, or to you." She wraps me up in her arms. "I don't know what I would do if that happened."

Me either.

I thought I was crazy for having those thoughts.

"I get scared that one day you'll believe all those stories about me cheating on you," Ashley whispers as her voice shakes a little.

"I know they're not true," I assure her.

I do.

I'd kill her if they were.

Even with my past of getting cheated on that doesn't concern me.

"But still," Ashley sighs. "How many times do they have to make stuff up for you to doubt that?" I have no clue if that was rhetorical. "For you to doubt me."

"Ash," I stare right into her eyes to make sure she believes what I'm going to say. "Don't think that way; because I don't." I wait a few seconds before continuing. "At all."

Old habits really are hard to break.

Something Ashley and I both have to work on.

"You're the most amazing person I know," I say with as much sincerity and conviction as I can possibly muster.

Ashley smiles as she runs her fingers through my hair. "I don't even come a close second to you."

And just like that the mood shifts.

Gone is the anxiety.

For the most part

All I feel is loved.

That's a great feeling!

It doesn't bother me that Ashley has her own set of doubts.

If anything it makes me feel better about mine.

It makes me believe that those same doubts will be the very thing that prevents Ashley, or me, from repeating our past mistakes.

"You're never getting rid of me," I inform my future wife. "Even if you wanted to go, I wouldn't let you…or I'd insist I come with."

"I guess that means I'm stuck with you?" Ashley asks as she rubs my nose with hers.

I smile. "For the rest of your life."

Ashley flashes me that nose crinkle smile of hers before kissing me softly. "I'm glad you told me what's on your mind."

"I am too," I reply and then I kiss her again. "I'm glad that you told me what's going on in that gorgeous head of yours as well."

"I am hot," Ashley agrees, making me laugh. "There's nothing you can't say to me," she promises.

And I really feel like there isn't.

Which is why I allow myself to feel secure about our future, even with my insecurities.

"What if I didn't like one of your songs?" I inquire as I take advantage of the lighter atmosphere surrounding us.

Ashley doesn't seem impressed with my joke. "How dare you suggest something so horrible!" I'm about to respond when she cuts me off. "Especially after what you did."

Uh oh.

I was counting on her forgetting about that minor indiscretion of mine.

"I said I was sorry," I try.

"And I told you I'd get you back," Ashley replies with a glare. "But I've made a decision."

I know!

She's going to let it go because she's awesome.

"I'm not going to get you back right away," she continues.

Say what?

I was wrong?

That's impossible.

"I figure what's the fun in that?" Ashley smirks. "Better to wait for when you least expect it."

Hey!

That's mean!

And brilliant on her part.

Damn it!

"It could happen tomorrow," Ashley warns slyly. "Or it could be thirty years from now. Whenever it happens doesn't matter; just know that it will."

"You're terrible, Ashley," I lie.

She's the exact opposite of terrible.

She's the best thing that's ever happened to me.

And I won't let anything or anyone come between us.

"I never said I wasn't," Ashley jokes, but I know she's not putting herself down. "Let's go to sleep."

Normally I'd demand she exact her revenge on me immediately, but I really do feel like having a night of cuddles instead.

Ashley cuddles are the best!

She gets rid of our bowls, comes back to bed and we say I love you one more time before snuggling up with each other.

There's always tomorrow for me to start making demands.

Tomorrow.

Something I'm not scared to face anymore.

Even though I have no clue what it will bring.


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N Rating is higher for this chapter, probably Rish. If you're not into that kind of thing, I suggest you skip this update :) I hope you enjoy...**

Chapter 7

I look at Ashley and smile.

She's just adorable in her sleep.

To be fair, she's adorable pretty much all day, every day.

But for some reason, right now, she seems even cuter than normal.

I woke up this morning feeling a lot better about everything that happened yesterday.

Many hours of sleep, cuddled next to Ashley will do that to a person.

I'm sure telling her what was bothering me helped as well.

I'm even awake before her.

That says something.

I'm a big fan of sleep.

And of Ashley's wake up calls.

But that's not what I'm about to give her.

I have other plans for us.

That sounds dirty.

It's not.

Sorry to disappoint.

Ashley's tank top has risen up her stomach while she's been in la-la land.

My current view is threatening to derail my well laid out plans.

Ok, ok, not really but her abs make it hard for me to remember why I'm trying to get her up in the first place.

Very hard!

But once I have my mind set on something, I don't let anything stand in the way of me and my goal.

Take Ms. Davies as an example.

I wanted her, and I got her.

It was easy as pie!

What?

I have an amazing selective memory!

I'm tired of being the only one awake.

I tickle Ashley's arm.

She stirs, but her eyes remain shut.

So I choose another course of action.

I bend down and place a very soft kiss on her very kissable lips.

On her face!

Geez!

I think my reputation precedes me.

I have no idea why it would.

What?

Whatever.

I have more important things to focus on at the moment.

Like a certain brown-eyed girl whose eyes are fluttering open.

Yay!

She's awake!

I smile at Ashley as I wait for her eyes to get more focused. "Good morning."

"Mmmm," she replies as she sits up. She yawns, and it's such a cute sight I can barely contain myself. "You seem to be in a good mood."

"Of course I am," I reply with a toothy grin. "I'm in love with the most incredible girl. That's bound to put me in a good mood."

Not to toot my own horn, but I think I just made Ashley swoon.

She gives me a sleepy, yet adorable smile. "If you think for one second that kind of sweet talk is going to work on me, you're sadly mistaken."

How dare she!

I wasn't trying to anything like that!

Honest!

I roll my eyes despite not having any right to. "I went ahead and made you breakfast in bed and you're going to doubt my motives?" I flash Ashley my best puppy dogs eyes to make her feel as bad as possible. "Nice one, Ash."

She eyes me suspiciously, "I don't see any breakfast."

That's because it's hidden on the floor on my side of the bed.

I'm a sneaky one!

"And now you're calling me a liar?" I cry out like she's wounded me. "You better watch yourself; Ash_ley_ or you'll make my list too."

I have no basis whatsoever to issue such a warning.

That doesn't stop me though.

My fiancé does not appear at all phased by my threats. "I'll be right back, don't eat without me."

Why does she have to say things that make it damn near impossible for my thoughts to stay pure and innocent like I am?

What?

Ashley has nothing to worry about.

I won't eat her when she's not here.

Gah!

I mean, I won't eat when she's not here.

No!

No!

No!

I won't eat food without her here.

Finally!

I thought something right.

Ashley chooses just the right moment to come back to bed.

Her presence will vanquish all my less than pure thoughts away.

Yeah.

Right.

Ashley gets back under the covers but she doesn't lie down.

Boo!

Hiss!

Just kidding.

"Where's my breakfast?" She asks with a cheeky smile.

Is there any time of day that she doesn't look good?

Let me think about that.

What is no…Alex.

I just won my own final jeopardy question.

And my prize is sitting a few feet away from me.

Score!

"Our breakfast," I clarify as I bend down to get the tray off the floor. "Unless you're going to deny me some nourishment."

"I would never do anything like that," Ashley replies. Just as I'm about to marvel at how good she is to me, Ashley keeps talking. "Not when you're going to need your strength for later."

Uhm.

Ok!

I glance over at Ashley and when I see the look in her eyes, I know exactly what is going on.

She's sending me a signal.

A signal I can't ignore.

A signal I don't want to ignore.

While last night might have been about honesty, love and cuddles…today is going to be about something else.

Lust.

Want.

Desire.

Need.

Four of my favorite words in the dictionary.

Besides love of course.

Ashley is letting me know that our foreplay has started.

Not with kisses or touching.

No.

Our foreplay is going to be words, looks and teasing.

Woo!

Hoo!

I smirk at Ashley as I place the tray over her lap.

That's a signal too.

It lets her know that I've accepted her challenge and I'm game.

Am I ever!

Ashley's eyes light up when she sees the gourmet breakfast I made for her. I have skills outside the bedroom that I like to use on occasion.

Bam!

"You like?" I ask as I get comfortable next to her.

Ashley nods enthusiastically, "I'm starved."

She tries to dig in but I don't allow her to touch one bite of food. "Let me, please." She pouts but then she remembers that's cute, not sexy. So, in the spirit of things, Ashley licks her lips seductively while she waits for me to cut her breakfast.

Fuck!

That's hot!

I'm momentarily distracted by the show and I almost jump her. Then I remember that wouldn't be nearly as fun, so I lick my lips as well.

Ha!

Ashley can't keep her eyes of me.

I think we both scored a point this round.

When I have her first bite ready, I hold my fork up so she'll open up.

Her mouth!

And maybe some other parts later.

I lean in slowly to enhance the effect I'm having on Ashley.

It's working by the way.

I bring the fork just to the edge of her mouth, and right as she's about to consume what's on it, I eat it instead.

Oh my god!

That was hilarious.

The expression of shock and disbelief on Ashley's stunning face almost causes me to choke.

She looks like I just gave away her favorite childhood toy or something.

I'm laughing so hard.

God, I love her.

"I can't believe did that!" Ashley exclaims as she folds her arms across her lovely chest. "Leggo my Eggo!"

I told you I was a world class chef.

What?

"I'm sorry," I say, even though I'm so not. I pinch Ashley's cheek and her response is to growl. Sexy! "You can have the next bite."

Ashley shuts her mouth and shakes her head.

I try, unsuccessfully, to get her to take the next piece of waffle I'm offering her.

Damn, she's stubborn.

That's ok, I am too.

I can tell this might take some convincing on my part.

Time to pull out the big guns.

I lift my fork in the air and Ashley is still refusing to give an inch.

"Open up for the choo-choo train," I command.

No response.

I move the fork even closer to Ashley as I chant, "Chugga, chugga, chugga, chugga."

That does the trick.

Ashley bursts out laughing and I manage to shove a forkful of waffle in her sensual mouth.

I win!

Yay again!

Once Ashley has swallowed her food, she tugs me over to her and I receive a kiss for being utterly adorable.

It's a curse really.

Her lips taste sweet from the syrup.

Yummy!

She pulls back before we get too carried away, and that's ok with me.

We have the whole morning and most of the afternoon to mess around.

Literally.

* * *

Where is Ashley?

I don't get what is taking her so long!

I'm normally such a patient person.

Ok, ok, I'm not at all but this is getting ridiculous.

Our breakfast together was awesome!

We shared food, laughs, sweet kisses and had a lot of eye sex.

That was fun.

But I'm kind of ready for the real thing.

Really ready.

Super ready.

So fucking ready!

Unfortunately for my libido, someone wants to go swimming first.

The nerve!

And that's why I want to get this show on the road.

Once the swimming is done, we can move on to other things.

I have to say, I'm shocked.

Oh man, not now voice!

"Ashley, hurry up," I whine from the bottom of the stairs.

She doesn't respond.

Gah!

I don't have time for this!

Please!

You always have time for what's about to happen.

I thought I told you to leave me alone.

I hate that damn voice in my head!

No you don't, you love me.

Plus, what you're about to see; will turn that frown upside down.

I'm not listening!

That's not the Spencer I know.

The Spencer I know, would be chanting something right about now.

Nope.

Not going to happen.

That was so three years ago.

I don't want to repeat myself to the point that it's not funny anymore.

I'm not leaving you alone until you say it.

I'd block my ears if I thought it would make that stupid voice go away.

Say it!

No!

You know you want to.

No!

Is it normal to have a fight with yourself?

Don't answer that.

My inner struggle is cut short when Ashley appears at the top of the stairs.

Oh!

My!

God!

Ashley poses because she knows how much I love it when she does that.

My eyes rake their way up and down her smoking hot body.

Her smoking hot body that is wearing a…

Must…fight…urge.

Must…resist.

Must…not...give…in…to…my…

Ashley in a bikini!

Ashley in a bikini!

Ashley in a bikini!

Damn it!

I thought I had some control.

Who the hell cares when you're about to have sex with Ashley?

Oh voice, I knew there was a reason why I kept you around.

I don't blink the entire time Ashley walks down the stairs.

Can you blame me?

"You're drooling," Ashley whispers in my ear on her way to the backyard.

Fuck yeah I am!

Hey, she left without me!

I turn around just in time to see Ashley's sexy hips sway out the sliding door.

I don't think I'm going to win our bet.

Sorry, I should explain myself.

We made a friendly wager during breakfast regarding who could hold out longer today.

Spencer Carlin never loses!

But if I'm going to lose to anyone, and sex with Ashley is my punishment, I'm surprisingly ok with that.

I'm not conceding just yet though.

When I meet Ashley outside, I nearly orgasm on the spot.

She didn't wait for me to put her sunblock on her…she's doing it herself.

Dayum!

Her hands are rubbing one of her legs.

And all I can do is stare.

Then she moves to her stomach.

Oh god!

I feel like I'm in a trance.

A trance I don't want to break out of.

Ashley starts eye-fucking me as she continues to slather sunblock all over her front.

Oh god!

She's playing so dirty.

So fucking dirty!

Go Ashley!

"Can you do my back for me?" Ashley asks and I happily agree to assist.

I'm getting such flashbacks right now.

It doesn't matter if I've seen Ashley in a bikini! a lot, I react the same way every time.

Every time!

There is a difference though from that glorious, stupendous day that I saw her nearly nude, so many moons ago.

A big difference.

I can be a tad more obvious about my feelings today.

And I can also play dirty!

I press my front against Ashley's back. "Is this where you want me?" I husk into her ear.

Ashley flinches, "There is good." Her voice gets a party started in my bikini bottoms

"Do you like what I'm doing?" I inquire as I spread sunblock across her hot flesh. "Do you like it when I touch you?"

"Oh god, yeah," Ashley replies enthusiastically. "I really do."

"I love touching you," I say even though she knows that already. "I think you missed a spot," I lie as I move my hands across her abs. "I don't want you to get burned."

Ashley moans in response to my teasing.

Then I bite her ear.

She moans louder.

"All done." I announce with a lot of glee.

I am a tease!

A damn good one!

I expect to get some flak for leaving hot and wet, but my girl chooses another route.

She spins me around and suddenly I remember that Ashley is a damn good tease also.

Oh god!

Once again I'm paralyzed while Ashley has her way with me.

But she doesn't stop at my back.

She uses my inability to move to put sunblock all over my body.

All over!

I might be moaning as she works.

Ashley drops to the ground and when she looks up at me, I moan again.

Ashley in a bikini on her knees!

I think my head just exploded.

Her fingers move up and down both of my legs, turning them into jelly.

The fact that I remain standing is a miracle.

Glory glory hallelujah!

I'm about to go to the promised land!

Oh!

Yeah!

Screw winning.

I want to screw Ashley.

I'm sorry.

Was that crass?

Who cares!

I certainly don't.

Ashley dives into the pool and I'm only seconds behind her.

When we emerge from the water, neither one of us is smiling.

There's something else going on instead.

Something good.

Something great.

Something sexy.

Something fucking incredible.

I know what's coming.

Ashley knows what's coming.

Oh god!

I lunge at my swimming partner and she doesn't move.

My lips are on Ashley's in an instant.

Then my tongue finds hers.

Oh god!

I don't mind the slight taste of chlorine that I get from kissing Ashley.

I don't mind at all!

I half swim, half push Ashley until her back hits the edge of the pool.

Oh god!

It's a good thing we're in water or the heat we're generating, combined with the hot California sun, would make me combust.

I want to make Ashley combust first.

She has other plans however.

My back is pressed against the edge of the pool and Ashley's lips are on my neck.

Oh god!

I want to protest but I can't.

I'm enjoying what Ashley's doing too much to protest.

She attacks my neck like she hasn't had me in days.

Oh god!

"Fuck, Ashley!" I moan just before she's back to kissing me.

She unties my bikini top and it floats away as we continue to kiss like it's going out of style.

One of her hands cups my right breast and it's not long before she's playing with my nipple between her fingers.

Oh god!

I can't…

She's so…

Oh god!

Our mouths crash together as our bodies do as well.

Oh god!

I manage to get my mind focused on something beside how good Ashley is making me feel.

She's holding us up with her body and I use this to my advantage.

I slide my hand down her stomach and into her, without warning.

Oh god!

Ashley cries out from the intrusion.

But it's a cry of absolute pleasure.

I thrust two fingers inside of her as we maintain eye contact.

Oh god!

I love feeling her like this.

I love connecting with her so intimately.

I love feeling like I'm a part of her.

Ashley's hips move in time with my thrusts.

I don't have the best angle but I'm able to do a pretty good job of making her moan.

I'd pat myself on my back if my hands weren't occupied at this moment.

One of them is tangled in Ashley's wet hair as our faces hover inches away from each other.

My other hand is moving in and out of Ashley at an incredible speed.

"So close," Ashley groans when I graze her clit with my thumb.

Oh god!

I am too but this isn't about me.

I pull Ashley into my lips just as I curl my fingers so I hit just the right spot.

Oh god!

She comes while I'm smothering her mouth with mine.

I keep my fingers going until she collapses against me.

Oh god!

That got me so hot!

I'll give her a few minutes to catch her breath though.

I'm so thoughtful!

After I withdraw from Ashley, I hold her close to me and I love that I can feel her rapid heartbeat when I do.

I made it go that fast.

I made her mine all over again.

When her energy returns, Ashley presses her forehead against mine and smiles. "You lost."

"You're right, I did," I pout as I wrap my arms around her. "Cheer me up."

I shiver when Ashley smirks.

Oh god!

I am two seconds away…

"Honestly Ashley, must you do that in public. You're not a teenager anymore."

Uh oh.

We've been busted.

By Ashley's mom!

Whoa.

Wait.

What?

Why is that bitch in our house?

And for her information, we aren't in public; we're in our private backyard.

Which brings me to my next question.

How did she get in our house?

She definitely doesn't have a key.

"Mother, what an unpleasant surprise," Ashley says after she turns around.

She's covering my body with hers, and that's when I realize I'm still topless.

Holy shit!

I'd be more worried about the confrontation that's about to take place if I wasn't so embarrassed about being half nude.

"What are you doing here?" Ashley's voice is ice cold.

I haven't heard that voice in such a long time.

I can't stand when she sounds like that.

I don't blame Ashley for the tone she's using.

Not at all.

Her mother deserves to be spoken to in that manner because she's so awful.

But she doesn't sound like the Ashley I fell in love with.

That's what makes me concerned.

I'm not sure if I should speak up or not.

I have no idea what the right thing to do in this situation is.

I feel Ashley go rigid in front of me.

My desire to tell Ashley's mother off is stopped when I notice she's not alone.

Standing behind her is a girl looking just as shocked as I feel.

She can't be more than eighteen or nineteen years old and there's something oddly familiar about her.

She's got a duffle bag on her shoulder and a guitar case by her side.

I have a bad feeling that whoever she is, her presence is not going to sit well with Ashley.

A very bad feeling!


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N I hope everyone had a nice weekend. Thanks for your feedback, it's always nice to hear :) I'll be back tomorrow! **

Chapter 8

Let's recap shall we.

I just had great sex with Ashley.

Or I should say Ashley had a fantastic orgasm, while I have yet to get any kind of release.

Not that I didn't enjoy making Ashley come, but a girl has needs.

Then we were rudely interrupted by her horrible mother who I'd rather not know. Also, there's some mystery girl by her side that looks like she'd rather be anywhere but here.

That makes two of us honey!

Oh, and how could I forget, I'm topless.

Topless!

Sans top.

Bare breasted.

Half naked even!

And for some reason I don't think I'll be getting the upper part of my bikini back anytime in the near future.

What an afternoon!

"I asked you a question," Ashley hisses at her mother because that damn woman hasn't given her a reason why she's intruded on our playtime.

Mystery girl is blushing, and I'm about two seconds away from freaking out.

One…

Two…

"You are such a drama queen," Bitch Mom says as she rolls her eyes.

I think a bitch slap for Bitch Mom would be quite an appropriate reaction to her bitchy like ways.

Bitch please!

She needs to back the hell up or I'm going to do something I probably won't regret.

Of course having my breasts covered would certainly aide my desire to go ape-shit crazy on a certain someone's ass.

Ashley is showing remarkable restraint right now. I'm hoping she doesn't lose it completely because I don't like seeing her upset. "And you haven't changed one bit."

Bitch Mom rolls her eyes again, and I'm shooting her daggers with my eyes.

Not that she cares.

I have had the distinct displeasure of meeting Bitch Mom or B.M,. as I secretly call her, twice in my life.

The first time was after Ashley and I flew to New York to do some publicity for her record. It was actually a nice trip where I got to meet some of the friends she had left behind.

She was nervous because she didn't want to introduce me to B.M., but I assured her that she had nothing to be nervous about.

I was wrong.

Shocking!

That woman looked at me like I was a piece of gum she had stuck to the bottom of her over-priced pumps. She disregarded Ashley in a manner that made me want to throttle her. And it left my girl reeling.

A few months later she told me that she had accepted that B.M. would no longer be a part of her life and that's the last we ever thought we'd hear from her. While I believe that Ashley truly meant those words at the time, I don't believe anyone can have that horrible a person for a mother and not have it sting.

My mom helped though.

She treats Ashley like a mother should treat a child, but it's not the same.

I know below the surface Ashley wishes that her own mother wasn't such a horrible excuse for a human being. She doesn't show it in any way, and I think a big part of her accepts that she doesn't have the power to change what's happened.

But I'm sure it hurts.

It has to.

Time number two occurred about six months ago when Ashley and I were shopping in Beverly Hills. I had spotted this fabulous Prada purse I just had to have and we were having a pleasant day just enjoying each other's company.

That all changed when we bumped into B.M.

It would seem she married some rich guy and moved to Los Angeles a few months before.

That's right, she moved to L.A. and didn't tell her daughter that they were living in the same city again.

B.M. brings new meaning to the word dysfunction.

Ashley played it off as nothing at the time, but later, when it was just us, she vented to me about what she felt. While I don't like knowing that anyone has hurt her, I do like that she was able to talk to me about the incident.

We've managed to avoid her since that unpleasant surprise.

Until today that is.

Until she showed up unannounced.

Until she brought some girl with her that we still don't know the identity of.

B.M. looks over at the aforementioned girl before looking back at her daughter. "I don't see the need for your attitude, Ashley, when I'm the one that was put in this unpleasant situation."

Ashley is so tense right now she could probably bench press a linebacker.

I think my semi-nudeness is the only reason she hasn't gotten out of the pool yet.

"You're not the one that had _this one_," she points to mystery girl, "show up on their doorstep without warning."

"Kind of like you showing up where you aren't welcome," Ashley fires back.

Nice zinger, Ash!

I'd hi-five you, but I'm presently trying not to flash my future mother-in-law and someone who's a stranger.

B.M. seems bored so she decides to cut right to the chase. "You should really learn to lock your front door if you don't want people barging into your house when you're doing _that_."

Oh god!

Did she hear?

Oh god!

I'm in my not so happy place and I can't find a way out.

Wait.

What?

The front door was unlocked?

Oops.

I think that's my fault.

I was so impatient to see Ashley in a bikini! I must have forgotten to lock the door when I got the morning paper.

I'll apologize to my fiancé later.

When we're not with B.M. and She-Who-Does-Not-Seem-To-Have-A-Name.

"Besides, this isn't my problem," B.M. continues in that snarky tone I hate. "I'm not the one who couldn't keep it their pants; that would be your father. Like I'm even surprised…that man was trouble from the first day I met him."

Whoa.

Whoa.

Whoa!

Did I mention whoa?

Tell me B.M. did not just say that about Ashley's dad!

No, seriously, tell me she didn't say that because I'm scared about Ashley's reaction if she actually did.

Oh my god!

There's too much information in that statement for me to fully comprehend what she means.

In the back of my mind I already know.

Ashley goes to lunge at B.M., but I hold her in place.

"You're such a liar!" Ashley yells as she struggles against the very firm grip I have around her hot body.

Mystery girl appears horrified.

I don't blame her.

At all.

Whoever she is, her introduction into our lives is not going well.

"Your father was always running around, afraid to grow up and marrying him was a big mistake," B.M. announces like it's no big deal.

She's a real piece of work.

A piece of work I'd like to take a two-by-four to.

What?

I wouldn't really do that. I'm a lover not a fighter.

And what a lover I am!

Ok, ok, even I know that this isn't the right time to comment on my bedroom skills.

"I guess he made a mistake or two of his own." B.M. eye's shift over to mystery girl, "And he didn't take care of them like he should have."

Oh my god!

That woman is evil incarnate.

How could she produce someone as amazing as Ashley?

Seriously!

I'm starting to think Ashley might have been adopted or something.

B.M. looks at her watch. "As much fun as this family reunion has been, I do have places to go."

Thank you!

I don't think I can keep Ashley at bay much longer.

She's feisty!

She looks mystery girl up and down and then she gets this really awful expression on her hideous face. "There, I brought you to Ashley, now I expect that you won't contact me again."

I'm so confused.

I'd really like to know what is going on.

And I think Ashley does as well.

After she calms down, that is.

Mystery girl just stands there like she can't believe how horrid B.M. is.

If she only knew.

B.M. throws one more look of disdain in Ashley's direction, and then she's gone.

Wow.

Really…wow.

Could this be any more of an awkward situation?

I actually have no desire to find out the answer to that question.

No desire!

With 'Psycho Sally' gone, it's just me, Ashley and someone I'm almost certain is about to have a big impact on our lives.

I can't see Ashley's face because I'm hiding behind her. If I had to guess though, I'd say she is not a happy camper.

Mystery girls shuffles around on her feet before deciding to speak. "Uhm, hi, I'm, uhm, I'm Kyla."

She does have a name!

Good because mystery girl was getting old fast.

Kyla…

Kyla…

That's not a bad name.

I wonder if she was really meant to be called Kayla but someone forgot to put in the first 'a' so she became Kyla.

Nah, that's silly.

Who in their right mind would let their child's name become something different because of typo?

Moving on…

I'd like to ask Kyla who exactly she is but I'm still trying to figure out a way to get my bikini top back.

I should probably see if I can locate it.

I scan the pool and then I notice it floating near the shallow end.

That is so far away.

So, so far away!

I'd give just about anything to have rubber arms right about now.

Actually, they would be pretty awesome to have at any time.

Imagine the possibilities!

Ashley could be sitting in another room and when she least suspected it, I could stretch my arm in order to fu..

"Who are you exactly?" Ashley barks out, bringing me back to the present where drama is unfolding and I don't have super powers.

Kyla seems so nervous and I can understand why. Ashley sounded remarkably like B.M. just a second ago, and that's not something I'm really happy about.

But this isn't about me so I'm going to go back to worrying about Ashley's well being.

"I, uhm, I guess I'm your sister," Kyla says in a squeaky voice.

I'm sorry.

What?

What the fuck did she just say?

Ashley's sister?

Ashley has a sister?

And she just appeared out of thin air without anybody knowing about her?

This is madness!

I can understand this happening on a show like _Buffy, _but not in real life.

Things like that don't happen in real life.

They really don't.

Right?

Then why do I feel like I'm about to discover that long-lost siblings can exist no matter how illogical or ludicrous their presence might seem.

Yeah…

I'm in shock.

I'm sure Ashley is too.

And I'd bet my bottom dollar that Kyla never imagined her first meeting with her sister would be playing out this way.

"How much do you want?" Ashley asks, surprising her sister and me.

Her sister.

That's going to take some getting used to.

Kyla doesn't know exactly what Ashley is implying, but I do. "Excuse me?"

"This is obviously some ploy to extort money from me." Ashley's voice is ice cold. "If I really had a sister, my dad would have told me. So how much is going to cost for you to leave and not come back?"

I attempt to put my hand on Ashley's shoulder as a show of support but she brushes the gesture off.

Uhm.

Ok.

I'll give her some leeway here and not take that personally.

Kyla appears wounded by Ashley's accusation, and it's also hard for me not to feel some sympathy for her. I'm going to go out on a limb and surmise this whole thing is weird and off-setting for in a way that differs from Ashley, but is still bothersome.

To be fair to Ashley, I'm not sure what Kyla expected by showing up in such a dramatic fashion. Who wouldn't freak out if they find out that their father had produced another offspring and they had kept it a secret?

My gut tells me that Kyla is not lying.

Whether she really is Raife Davies' daughter remains to be seen, but I'm almost positive she believes she is.

"I'm not trying to pull a fast one or anything like that," Kyla responds, sounding upset.

"Either tell me how much you're looking for, or get the fuck out of my house," Ashley fires back, and I'm not able to prevent her from getting out the pool.

She's beside Kyla in no time and all I can do is watch.

I'm too busy covering my breasts with my arms to join Ashley.

Hopefully she realizes that I'm supporting her from in the water.

I'm contemplating making a move to get my bikini top but I'm stopped by Kyla's voice.

"I have a letter," she says as she produces a piece of paper from her jean pocket. "It arrived at my house about a week ago."

A week ago!

Why did she wait a whole week before coming forward with this information?

Why?

Maybe I'll ask that if I ever get fully clothed again.

Ashley snatches the piece of paper out of Kyla's hand so fast I'm worried she gave the poor girl a paper cut.

When Ashley is done reading, she glares at Kyla and then she rips that document in half.

"I don't care what that piece of paper says; I don't have a sister," she replies as she clenches her teeth. "And no matter how many forged records you produce, I won't believe you."

Uhm.

Ok.

This is starting to get serious.

I have no clue how I'm supposed to handle this crisis.

Maybe I should call Dr. Phil.

He's a wise man.

Kidding!

I can't stand that blowhard.

I'm still at a loss though.

If I thought the other night was World War III, I'm thinking today might be the start of Armageddon.

Figuratively, of course.

My quest to put clothing over my breasts is once again put on hold.

Ashley whips her head in my direction. "I'm sorry, Spence, I can't be here right now. I'll call you later."

Huh?

What was that?

I don't have a chance to question Ashley about where she's going or what she's about to do because she's gone before I can react.

That leaves me in the pool, with her illegitimate sister for company, and I'm still topless.

Great!

Just great!


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N Double update today, so look for Chapter 10 to be posted right after this one. This will probably be the last time I post two chapters at once considering I'm going to run out of new stuff in about a week. Don't worry though, I have every intention of finishing this story. Enjoy! **

Chapter 9

Pattycake, pattycake, baker's man.

Bake me a cake as fast as you can.

I'm stuck in a pool, with barely any clothes on.

And my dear Ashley is gone, gone, gone.

Ok, ok, I know that's probably not the right thing to be thinking at the moment. But in my defense, a lot has transpired over the last little bit and I'm still trying to processing everything.

What I should probably be focusing on is the surprise half-sister of Ashley's that is currently looking at me like she has no idea how to act or what to do.

That would be Kyla of course.

Kyla being Ashley's half-sister.

Ashley has a

Yeah, that's going to sound weird for a while.

I'm not sure I've ever been in more of an awkward situation like the one I'm in currently.

Let me think back.

Thinking…

And the survey says…I haven't!

I suppose it could be worse. Ashley and I could have been caught having sex.

Oh wait.

We were!

By her mom!

And her sister!

Gah!

My cheeks are burning and it's not because of the sun that's shining down on me.

You know who never had a chance to go down on me?

Ashley!

Damn you B.M.!

Damn you all to hell!

She should have called and warned us she was coming over with Ashley's sister!

The decline in manners these days is unacceptable.

I think I should probably say something to Kyla before things get any weirder.

Ha!

Like that's even possible!

Kyla isn't what's really occupying my thoughts right now anyway.

It's Ashley's reaction to her sister's existence, and her taking off that has me concerned.

I don't blame her.

I'm not even mad.

I'm just worried.

So why am I still in the pool, semi-nude, gawking at stranger?

I should be inside, trying to get to Ashley before she leaves.

I am so blonde sometimes!

It's time for Take-Charge Spencer to spring to action!

Literally!

Before I can do that though, I need to make myself presentable.

"Do you mind turning around?" I ask Kyla as I start moving towards my bikini top with my arms covering my breasts.

She gets even redder in the face than I am, and I almost feel sorry for her. She'll have to wait for my sympathy until I get things with Ashley sorted out however, because that's all that matters to me at the moment.

"Sure, sure, no problem, I'll uh, I'll turn around." Kyla stammers nervously. She's not making eye contact but I think that has to do with how close my face is to my breasts.

Lord knows I don't want to give her a free show.

I've already flashed enough people to last a lifetime.

Don't judge!

It was spring break and I had consumed one too many margaritas.

I couldn't find my shirt then either.

Or my lost shaker of salt.

Where was I?

Oh yeah, I'm about to end the worlds longest topless streak.

I should call those Guinness people when I have some free time.

I'm sure my mom would be so proud to learn I made the record books.

Success!

My nipples are covered once more!

It's a miracle!

Thank you bikini Gods, thank you!

Alright, I've put out fire number one, but now is not the time to bask in my victory.

Now is the time to head on inside and deal with fire number two.

I hear trumpet music in my head and I'm very close to yelling, "Charge!"

I leap out of the pool in a single bound, and then I wrap a towel around my body to show Kyla that I do have a modest side to me.

What?

"Can you stay right there?" I make my request while trying to appear as dignified as possible. Not an easy task I'll have you know. "I'll be right back."

Kyla nods but she seems hesitant. "Sure, not a problem."

"I'm not going to get a gun or anything," I joke and then I realize it wasn't a very good one.

Kyla's eyes widen in fear.

Score!

I just came across like some sort of crazy person.

Idiot!

My future as a fire-putter-outer is in serious jeopardy.

Mmmm, I bet Ashley would make one sexy fire fighter.

She could climb up my ladder any day!

Argh!

My lack of getting some, is making my thoughts go all over the place.

What?

It's not like that every day!

It's not!

"I promise, you're safe," I assure Kyla as I dry myself off. I don't want to be dripping all over the place when I chase after Ashley.

Go away dirty thoughts.

Go away!

I'm going to lock them in my vault for the time being so all my energy can be spent on making this odd situation better.

It's awful quiet in here.

Shut up voice!

Now is not the time!

I flash Kyla a reassuring smile and then I dash into the house to see if I can stop Ashley before she runs to wherever it is she's planning to go.

As I step into the kitchen I spot her brown hair by the front door.

"Ash! Wait!" I call out before I sprint over to where she is. I'm relieved she doesn't move, otherwise I might have actually begun to freak out.

Right now my panic mode is not on high-alert.

If it ever reaches that point, god forbid, who knows what I'm capable of!

Actually, I'm acutely aware of what I'm capable of and that's a very scary thing for me to know.

Very scary!

When Ashley turns around, my heart jumps because of the pained look she's sporting.

Oh my god!

She's so sad!

There are no tears, but I can see the hurt and confusion in her eyes.

I don't say another word.

I don't spew any kind of platitude that won't make a difference.

I don't scold her for taking off.

The only thing I do, is put my arms around her.

Then I hold her close.

And tight.

Very tight.

Whatever she is going through, or will go through, I need her to know that I love her and support her.

That's all that's important and all she needs from me.

I'm not sure if Ashley's lack of tears is a good thing or a bad thing yet. On the one hand I don't like seeing her cry, on the other hand, I don't like it when she bottles up her emotions.

I don't quite know what to say or what I should be doing to console her.

Asking her if she's ok is stupid, because obviously she's not.

Asking her what's on her mind isn't the right thing either. I know what's on her mind; what I don't know is what her initial thoughts about Kyla are.

Asking her what I can do to make her feel better is another pointless question. Nothing can make her feel better immediately. She has to deal with her sudden sibling and the implication of her dad's decision to keep her existence a big secret first.

Asking her…

Perhaps I'm analyzing this situation too much.

I've been known to do that.

Just a little bit.

Instead of trying to figure out what she's going through or how she's feeling, I should come right out and make that inquiry so I don't have to keep guessing or making assumptions.

The last thing I want is to make an ass out of you and me.

Don't look at me like that! I didn't come up with that expression on my own.

Somebody else did!

Whatever.

Let's get back to the issue at hand.

Confronting Ashley about why she's leaving.

It's such a novel concept.

And it might work, so I'm going to give it a try.

"Ash…" I begin when I'm far away enough from her to see those brown eyes I adore.

"I know what you're going to say," dhe responds before I have the chance to finish speaking. "I'm sorry Spence, I have to get out of here."

"I understand," I say as I keep her firmly in place. "You're upset and this is such a big shock. But…"

Ashley shakes her head slowly. "This isn't about you or anything like that." She assures me softly.

Only five percent of me was concerned that might have been true.

Which is a very low number even taking into the account the three percent sampling error.

Pardon me; I've seen a lot of polls lately.

Oh my god!

Ew!

I have no interest in that kind of poll!

Or any kind of pole actually!

Thank you very much!

Where was I?

"I have to clear my head," Ashley continues as I force my brain to stop working. Not completely, but enough so I'm not interrupting her silently with my thoughts. "I need to figure this out."

I'm not going to lie, it hurts a little that she feels she has to get space in order to deal with what's bothering her. I know it's selfish but I can't help that it stings.

"I can be there to figure this out with you," I remind her as I place the palm of hand on her cheek. I keep my voice low and free of anything else besides love.

I have no desire to put Ashley on the defensive.

That is never a good thing.

"I know," Ashley whispers before placing a chaste kiss on my lips. "I'm so grateful that I have you by my side, but I have to calm myself down or I might say something to you that I'll regret."

Oh.

That's makes sense.

I suppose.

I certainly appreciate the fact that Ashley is taking my feelings into account. I shouldn't be what she's worried about though; she should be figuring out where she stands on the appearance of Kyla.

I've reached a conclusion.

If Ashley is truly convinced that she's making the best decision by taking a step away from everything, I'll let her be.

No questioning.

No second guessing.

No guilt.

Just my support, like I've promised to give her.

I've shown her that in the past, and there's no good reason for me not to give it to her now.

"I understand," I tell Ashley and then I make sure to get in another kiss before she leaves. "Don't forget to come back." I joke with a little smile on face.

Ashley frowns and then she pulls me in for one heart-stopping lip lock that makes my heart go berserk.

Uhm.

Wow.

I do believe Ms. Davies delivered a big message with that kiss.

Did she ever!

"I'll call you in a couple of hours," Ashley informs me in between a series of light pecks that I enjoy thoroughly. "I promise."

And with that, she leaves.

My lips are tingling and my concerns have been laid to rest.

I'm sure when all this drama has passed, the only thing that will be getting laid, is me.

Amen!

I think I'll spend my time away from Ashley catching up on some shows. I've missed a lot…

Oh my god!

Kyla!

I forgot about her for a second!

I'm not sure how I could, considering who she is.

Ashley's sister.

That really is going to take some time to fully sink in .

Talking with Kyla in a bikini is probably not the best idea. Who knows what way she swings? I haven't had the time to asses that about her yet, and I don't want her to be lusting after me in case she plays for our side.

What?

I was only joking around.

No, really, I was!

I have got to stop fighting with myself. It's tiring and seeing as I always win, I don't take losing to myself very well.

Enough!

It's time to get serious Spencer!

I think an interrogation of Kyla is in order.

She's earned it.

She showed up out of nowhere.

She interfered with me getting sex.

She upset my Ashley.

And she brought B.M. with her.

That's four strikes against Kyla already.

One more and she's out!

I throw on some clothes once my decision to get tough with Ashley's sister is sealed.

No, not that kind of tough.

Minds out of the gutter people.

Minds out of the gutter!

I'm all fired up now and I almost pity the poor girl because she's about to meet Angry Spencer.

Angry Spencer takes no prisoners.

She shows no mercy.

And she won't hesitate to introduce anyone who hurts Ashley to a world of pain!

Wait.

What if she's some kind of raving lunatic?

What if she's trained in marshal arts?

What if she's stronger than me?

I don't care!

Nobody messes with my woman and gets away with it.

Nobody!

I'm pumped up on adrenalin and I also have a canister pepper spray in my pocket just in case things get out of control.

A woman can never be too careful.

I'm scowling as I step outside.

Kyla's in the same spot I left her and her back is to me.

She has no idea that Hurricane Spencer is on her way to open up a can of whoop ass if necessary.

Yeah I am!

My eyes and heart are ice cold.

I will not let this stranger ruin the peacefulness of my life for any reason.

I notice that Kyla has picked the letter off the ground that Ashley tore and she's holding it in her hands.

That doesn't pierce my tough exterior.

Hell no!

Something else does.

Kyla turns around and her eyes are watery.

She looks on the verge of tears.

Aw!

She probably needs a hug.

No!

No!

No!

I can't comfort her!

I must get all the information I can from Kyla and then I can kick her out.

That's what I have to do.

But, she seems so lost.

And vulnerable.

Damn it!

She's not playing fair.

Kyla wipes her eyes quickly and then she pretends that she's fine. "I'm sorry about all of this," she says to me as she gathers up her things. "I never imagined my presence would cause such a ruckus. I'll see myself out."

Aw!

She's acting almost sweet.

Gah!

I have a feeling that this might be another Davies woman I have a soft spot for.

"Don't go," I reply, shocking Kyla and me as well.

Where did that come from?

I should send her back to wherever it is she lives and tell her to never return.

I can't though.

She is my future sister-in-law.

I think.

If she is Raife's daughter that makes her family.

I might not be married to Ashley yet, but that's just a technicality.

There are a lot of questions I want answered.

I will check her story out.

I will make sure that she's who she says she is.

And I'm also going to do one more thing.

Until she proves otherwise, I will give Kyla the benefit of the doubt.

I take her duffle bag off her shoulder and then I lead Kyla to the table where the group of us ate dinner last night.

Something tells me this girl has a story to tell.

And I'm going to listen to it.

I hope my resolution to keep an open mind is one Ashley understands.

Because like it or not, I have a feeling Kyla's presence in our life isn't temporary.

Which means Ashley will have to find a way to accept her new sibling.

Lucky for her she has me to help her with that.

And that's what I plan on doing regardless of the consequences.

I'm confident Ashley will thank me for what I'm about to do.

Eventually.

Right?


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10

"Here you go," I say to Kyla as I hand her a box of Kleenex.

She hasn't fully cried yet but it's always good to be prepared.

That's what I learned when I was a Girl Scout.

I was the best Girl Scout ever!

They even named an award after me.

Ok, ok, they totally didn't, but I was pretty awesome.

Fine!

Here's the what really happened…

I was kicked out of Girl Scouts when I accidentally lit a few tents on fire during a camping trip of ours. They completely overreacted in my opinion.

I really wanted to get my fire making badge but I was struggling with it big time. So I might have snuck in some lighter fluid to assist me in my quest to beat Sally "Know-It-All" Jenkins for the most badges in our troop.

I guess I used too much of the stuff because the next thing I know there were flames everywhere and all the girls were screaming their heads off.

I was kicked out of our troop and the organization as a whole the next day.

And that's the conclusion of my tragic foray in the world of Scouts.

It still hurts to talk about.

I did look pretty smoking in the uniform though.

Yeah I did!

"Thanks," Kyla replies and I must say she looks quite apprehensive.

I would be too in her shoes.

Speaking of shoes, I got a chance to check them out a few minutes ago and I'm happy to report they are not at all sensible enough to classify her as a lesbian.

Don't get me wrong, I love gay people, obviously, but now I don't have to be concerned that she'll make a play for me.

What?

I was only kidding.

Mostly.

I'm fairly sure though that Kyla is not a fellow sister, if you catch my drift.

She is Ashley's sister though.

Still weird!

I almost offered her a glass of water because that's what people tend to do when someone is upset or they've just suffered through a tragedy.

I don't really know why that's the case.

I mean its water!

Now, if I was being offered a big stiff drink that would be another story.

That's the only stiff thing I like being offered by the way.

And I'm done.

Back to Kyla, and back to the serious situation I find myself in.

I wonder where Ashley went.

Kyla takes a few Kleenex to wipe her eyes.

Aw!

She's making to so hard for me to stay neutral.

I really want to give her a big hug but I'm not sure that's the best thing to do.

I don't really know what the best thing to do in this situation is actually.

I'll let my wise mind guide my decisions.

I'm so screwed!

Not literally because we all know what happened there.

"I guess I should introduce myself," I say to Kyla when she appears ready to begin.

That's right; I'm going to be Serious Spencer.

She hardly ever comes out to play.

"I know who you are," Kyla replies and that gives me the coldest shiver.

Oh my god!

She's some crazy stalker of Ashley and she's going to kill me so she can have Ashley all to herself!

Oh my god!

Where's my pepper spray?

Where is it?

Oh my god!

Kyla chuckles and I swear it's the evilest chuckle I've ever heard.

She's going to chop me up in a million different pieces and they'll never find my hot body!

Oh my god!

"It's funny, I was a really big fan of Ashley's before I found out she was my sister," Kyla announces while I continue to search for my pepper spray. "Don't worry; I didn't have a crush on her or anything."

Oh my…

Wait.

What?

Ew!

That's such an odd and disturbing thing for Kyla to say.

She thinks so too, because her mouth is immediately covered by her hands and her face turns the same color as the Spencermobile.

"Oh my god!" Kyla exclaims in horror. "I can't believe that just came out of my mouth!"

Me either you crazy, psycho, weirdo who's about to murder me.

Me either!

"I'm really nervous," Kyla admits and I'm almost back to liking her again. "What I meant was, I am a big fan of Ashley's and because of that I saw you guys pictured together all the time."

Oh!

That makes sense!

I think.

I'm still not a hundred percent convinced she's firing on all cylinders.

I finally remembered that my pepper spray was in my other pocket, so I have my hand wrapped firmly around it, in case I need to fend off Kooky Kyla.

That makes me feel better.

For the most part.

"You guys make a really cute couple," Kyla tells me with a sweet smile.

Aw!

She's totally right.

Ashley and I were voted cutest couple in a magazine.

I can't recall the name but I when I heard the news, I squealed like I was in high school.

That was an awesome day!

"Thanks," I reply in a cool, detached sort of way. "What are you doing here?"

Whoa.

I sounded a lot harsher than I meant to.

Kyla seems wounded by my tone but she doesn't say anything to that affect. "That's a fair question." She inhales sharply before continuing. "I grew up not knowing who my father was. My mom told me he took off on us as a kid and that's all she'd say about him."

Stay strong, Spencer.

Stay strong!

Unfortunately my heart doesn't want to listen because it's already hurting a little and Kyla hasn't really revealed that much yet.

"A week ago I turned eighteen and was already planning to move out to L.A. by myself." Kyla has an odd expression on her face that I can't read. "I always dreamed of being a rock star even though my mom was completely against the idea."

I nod my head as she speaks but I remain silent otherwise.

I have a ton of questions in my head that will have to wait.

"She couldn't stop me because I was eighteen and I already had some money saved up." Kyla's voice cracks, and that leads to me coming up with even more question in my pretty head. "And that's when this letter arrived."

She hands me the ripped pieces of paper in her hand.

I scan over its contents and when I'm done, my stomach clenches.

I've looked over enough legal documents in my career to know when something is legitimate or not.

This letter is very legitimate, no matter what Ashley believes.

_Ay Caramba!_

Sorry about that, I started Spanish lessons the other day.

What?

I did!

I know, I know you thought I already mastered the Spanish language, but surprisingly I was mistaken.

Kyla doesn't notice the discussion I'm having with myself. "I was completely shocked. I still am, too be honest." She has Ashley's eyes and some of her mannerisms. Which is odd considering they didn't grow up together. "My mom confirmed the content of the letter and I was so blown away it delayed my trip out here for a few days."

I notice something in the letter that isn't fully explained. I point to it and then look up at Kyla. "What does this mean?"

"I was uh, just getting to that part," Kyla anxiously replies. "It seems, uh, Raife, uh, had this clause in his will that didn't take effect until I turned eighteen."

Intriguing.

I wonder if this is going to be a good surprise or a bad one?

"One of his lawyers got in contact with me and explained everything," Kyla explains. And what would be the reason they didn't get in contact with Ashley? "I guess Ashley was set up with a trust fund when uh, Raife, passed away but that wasn't her full inheritance. Uh, now that I'm eighteen she does, and uh, that means, we both get half of his twenty-five million dollar estate."

Kyla sure does use the word "uh" a lot.

She should probably use her part of that twenty-five million dollars on speech…

Whoa.

Did she just say twenty-five million dollars?

And Ashley gets half?

That's…

Hold on…

Give me a minute…

Twelve and a half million dollars!

Holy shit!

That's a lot of money!

Which means a lot of designer purses for me!

Ok, ok, I'm not really that shallow.

I'm just stunned!

Absolutely stunned!

Plus, Ashley and I are already rich.

Her wonderful career plus my business savvy have lead to us never having to worry about money again.

But still, twelve and half million dollars is nothing to sneeze at!

I'll make sure we donate a large portion of it to charity.

And then I'll be able to hit the shops without feeling any guilt!

Wait.

If Kyla has that much money too, why is she dressed so normally?

I would have gone out and revamped my whole wardrobe if I was suddenly a millionaire.

Actually, I did do that.

Perhaps her first priority wasn't money when she found out who her dad was and that she suddenly had a sister.

Oh voice, I knew there was a reason I kept you around!

"The only address the lawyer gave me was Christine's." Kyla is back to talking again so I should pay attention. "I had no idea what she was like or I wouldn't have gone to her to find Ashley."

Hmm, poor girl.

Huh.

That's not a really accurate statement anymore.

Because Kyla is far from poor now.

"I always wanted a sister," Kyla says with a lot of sadness in her voice. "I should have thought things through more but I was so excited to find out that I had one."

Aw!

That's so cute.

I believe Ashley should be the one hearing this but I have a feeling she wouldn't be able to listen with an objective mind.

Not that I blame her.

I wonder how long before she calls me.

Why did she say she'd call me in a few hours?

Did she fly somewhere?

Is she killing B.M. and then hiding the body out of state?

My thoughts have been awful dark today.

I knew I shouldn't have watched that many episodes of _Dexter_ back-to-back

"Wow," I exclaim when I think Kyla is finished.

Kyla laughs softly, "I know, that was pretty much my reaction. My mom is the only one who knows about this, I didn't even tell my best friend."

"Wow," I exclaim again because that's all I can say apparently.

"I guess Ashley isn't as happy with the news about me that I was about her." Kyla hangs her head and my heart goes out to her even more.

"I'm sure she'll come around," I assure her.

I hope that's the case.

I can usually judge people very well and my gut is telling me that Kyla is good people.

But, she's brought with her a firestorm for Ashley to deal with.

I know my girl; she's not going to care one iota about the money.

She's not going to care that she's finally gotten the sibling she'd tell me she often wished she had when she was young.

She's not going to care that this girl is just as lost as she is feeling.

She's not going to care about any of those things.

All she's going to care about is how her presence has changed so many things she thought were true.

I can only imagine how she's probably questioning her dad as she tries to deal with Kyla's existence.

Ouch.

It has to hurt that he never told her about Kyla before.

Maybe he would have when she was a bit older, but he died when she was seventeen.

Maybe he wanted to wait until Kyla was older.

Maybe Kyla's mom wanted to keep his existence a secret and he was only going along with her wishes.

Because from what Ashley has told me, and from what I've heard about Raife Davies from other people, he wasn't an asshole.

A shitty parent perhaps, but not an asshole.

"I'd really like it if she does," Kyla replies with a shrug. I don't think she is holding her breath for that to happen. "Can I leave you my number? Tell Ashley if she ever wants to call me, I'd love to hear from her."

For an eighteen year old, Kyla seems pretty together.

She must be pretty brave if she was going to move here before she had money.

I think I like the cut of her jib!

Now the only thing I have to do is convince Ashley that she doesn't deserve her anger.

Yeah, that's going to be easy.

Not!

"Do you have a place to stay?" I ask without really thinking about the implications of that question.

Kyla hesitates for a few seconds. "Not really, I don't know anyone out here. I was going to stay at a hotel or something."

Rut roh.

I fear some words are about to come out of my mouth that I cannot stop.

"You can't stay alone," I am fighting for control but I don't think I'm going to win. "We have an extra room."

No!

Why did I say that?

Ashley's going to kill me!

Not literally of course!

She loves me too much to hurt me.

Unless I ask her to!

But that's a story for another day.

Kyla looks unconvinced. "I don't think Ashley would like that very much."

Ok, smarty pants, no need to show off.

I already figured that out.

But there's no way I'm letting this sweet girl go out into the concrete jungle that is L.A.

My mom would freak out if found out I did.

That's it!

I'm a genius!

A gorgeous genius!

She can stay with my mom and dad!

There's plenty of room in their house and my mom would love to have the company.

I sound convincing.

Right?

"Just give me a sec." I tell Kyla before I head back inside the house.

I wonder what the best way to bring this up to my mother is.

"Hey mom, Ashley's illegitimate half-sister showed up out of nowhere and has no place to go. Ashley's freaking out otherwise she'd stay here. So, what do you say? Can I bring her over right now?"

Or should I go with Plan B.

"Mom, you don't look a day over forty. I have a small favor to ask you. Remember when you told me how much you miss having us kids around? Well, I have a solution to that problem…"

Both those ideas are good ones.

And if neither of them works, I'll use my powers of negotiation to get her to say yes.

Whatever happens, as soon as I've taken Kyla to my mom's I need to find Ashley.

Because the longer I don't hear from her, the worse I think things are going to be.

And that makes me nervous.

_Ya lo creo!_

And that makes me nervous!


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N I'm back to drop off another update for all of you, thanks again to those who are leaving feedback. I also appreciate anyone who mentioned the Spanish that I've used. My girlfriend is actually part Mexican so if there's something wrong with it...blame her lol! **

**Anyway, I'll either update again tomorrow or double up on Saturday. Have a good one :)  
**

Chapter 11.

I'm a bit apprehensive as I dial my mom's number.

I know she's a very giving person, but asking if Kyla can stay at her place might be pushing the boundaries of what a good Christian would do.

Especially considering Kyla is a multi-millionaire.

There is also the possibility that she's not who she says she is.

I think I'm going to hire a private investigator to check up on Ms…uhm, right, I don't know her last name.

I should probably ask her what it is.

Do you think Kyla will be offended if I also ask for her Social Security number?

The phone rings a few times and then my mom's answering machine picks up.

Oh man!

I got myself all psyched up for nothing!

Boo!

Hiss!

This sucks!

I decide to leave a message even though I'd rather speak to her myself. "Hey mom, it's me, your favorite daughter." Good thing she doesn't have any other daughters to confuse me with. "I'm not really sure where you are, but I hope you can call me back soon. Don't worry, nothing's wrong." A little white lie never hurt anybody. Besides, I don't even know if I'm lying. Yet. "So, yeah, call me, thanks."

I hope that didn't sound as lame to her as it did coming out of my mouth.

You know what else I like coming out my…

My phone rings before I can finish what I was thinking.

Oh well.

I'm sure I'll have another dirty thought in about two seconds to make up for that one being interrupted.

Please be Ashley!

Please be Ashley!

Please be Ashley!

Unfortunately, when I check the call display, I see that my future wife is not the person on the phone.

Boo!

Hiss!

Where is she?

At least all is not lost because I do recognize the number that is calling. "Hey Mom, that was fast."

"Hi, Spencer," my mom replies, and there's something off in her voice.

Oh god!

I wonder what's wrong?

Something's wrong.

I can feel it in my bones!

Oh god!

"What's wrong?" I screech into the phone as I clutch it tightly.

There's only so much my poor heart can handle today.

Not to mention I'm still, uh, how should I put this…

My engines are still fired up, but I know there's no chance of lift off any time soon.

_Sacre bleu!_

"Nothing," she replies quickly. "You're the one that called me. Remember?"

Oh yeah!

Hey!

It's not my fault!

I've had the most unusual of mornings.

Most unusual indeed!

"Right, right," I say as I start chewing on my fingernails. Suddenly I'm having serious doubts about asking my mom over the phone to let Kyla stay with her.

Hmmmm.

I'm thinking a surprise attack is the best course of action.

Brilliant!

That's what I am!

"Are you busy right now?" I ask oh-so coolly, if I do say so myself. "I was thinking of stopping by and spending some time with you."

Ha!

She has no clue what I'm up to.

"What are you up to?" My mom inquires, shattering my fragile ego. "Spence…."

"Geez, mom, it's really nice to know that you think so little of me." Damn! I thought I had her convinced. Not to worry, I'm not about to wave the white flag just yet. "I think there's something wrong with our connection." I make fake crackling noises even though I know I'm not fooling her. "I'll be over in a few minutes."

"Spencer…" My mom tries to stop me from hanging up, but it's no use.

"Ok, love you, mom…see you soon….can't wait…love you!" I disconnect our call and then ignore the subsequent ringing of the phone seconds later.

It's ok, I know my mom will forgive me.

Hopefully.

I grab my license, keys and sunglasses before heading back to Kyla so we can be on our way. I was going to accidentally-on-purpose forget my Blackberry at home but then I remembered that Ashley is still missing in action.

Oh where, oh where, has my dear Ashley gone?

Oh where, oh were can she be?

She's nowhere to be found.

I often fall on the ground.

And boy do I like touching her mound.

What?

That's a legitimate rhyme!

It is!

Anyway…

It's time for me to start fixing this mess.

A mess I had no hand in creating for the record!

When I return to Kyla, I find her looking at the various pictures Ashley and I have up around our house.

There are quite a few of the two of us.

Obviously.

But there are also a number of pictures displayed from the many Carlin family dinners, barbeques and various other gatherings that have taken place over the last few years.

I feel another pang in my heart because I'm almost positive Kyla had nothing like that growing up.

To be fair though, neither did Ashley. That doesn't make it right by any means, it's just I sometimes forget that about my lover because her life is so full now.

"You ready?" I ask Kyla, making my presence known.

Kyla turns around and she has that same sad look in her eyes that I saw earlier. She quickly covers up in an attempt not to show how out of sorts she must be feeling. "I'm ready." I sense there is still some hesitation on her part about staying with my mom. I can't blame Kyla, but I'm sure she'll be happy with her accommodations when she sees how generous and warm my mom really is.

Oh no!

That sounded ominous!

Didn't it?

Curses!

If just jinxed myself I'm going to be so mad at myself!

Argh!

I send Ashley a quick text to let her know I'm leaving the house and sadly I get no response from her in return.

Maybe her phone is off.

I hope that's the reason and nothing more serious is at hand.

The mature and responsible side of me is going to wait a few more hours before I really start to panic.

The irrational side of me that loves Ashley to the very core has already begun that process. But there are too many things going on at this moment for me to let that dramatic side of take over.

"Nice car!" Kyla exclaims when she sees the Spencermobile.

Oh come on, Ash!

Kyla can't be that bad!

She has excellent taste in cars!

"Thanks," I reply with a cocky smile. I put on my sunglasses in preparation for our journey. Even though my mom is close by that doesn't mean I can't have a little fun with Kyla. I think a mini tour of L.A., in my convertible, with the sun shining and the smog at a bearable level is in order. "Prepare to be amazed!"

Kyla has an odd expression on her face, but I'm not worried.

She's about to get the ride of her life.

Ew!

Not like that!

Pervs!

I rev the engine of my Mustang before taking off down the street.

This is going to be so much fun!

I peel into my mother's driveway like I've done so many times before. I bet you Kyla will be telling her own mother how amazing her first car ride in L.A. was.

Hell yeah she will!

"So?" I unbuckle my seat belt and turn to my passenger. "How awesome was that?"

Kyla opens her eyes and that makes me wonder why they were closed in the first place.

That's odd.

She even looks a little nauseous.

I bet you she's hungry or something.

"Don't worry," I start before she has a chance to answer me, "My mom will make you something really good to eat."

Kyla shakes her head, "That's ok, I think, uhm, I should let my stomach get used to the, uhm, heat."

That girl is an interesting character.

Not as interesting as me though!

Not.

Even.

Close.

Instead of figuring out why Ashley's sister has gone weird, I grab her guitar case while she lifts her duffel bag out of the trunk.

I still haven't decided on how I'm going to approach my mom to get her to agree to a new house guest, but I'm not concerned.

That much.

I have a great ability to improvise and talk my way out of jams.

I flash Kyla a reassuring smile and then I unlock the front door to my parent's place. "Hi mom, it's me!" I yell to announce my arrival. I wait a few seconds but don't get any response. "Mom?"

She better not have disappeared because I told her I was coming over!

That would be so rude!

So rude!

It's not like I've ever done something similar.

Ok, ok, there was this one time after Ashley and I first got together that my parents decided to surprise us with a visit. Normally I would have found that sweet but they really should have called first.

Ashley was all tied up.

Literally.

And we were so not in the mood for any company so we pretended we weren't home.

I don't think my mother ever believed me when I said we had gone to church that Sunday morning.

I wonder why that is?

I know the two stories aren't really related but the vision of Ashley tied up at my mercy is too delicious for me not to brag about it.

My attention is drawn to the present when my mom comes in from the backyard.

"Spencer, sorry, I didn't…" She stops mid-sentence when she notices Kyla standing beside me.

Oh man!

This is going to be such a long story!

I'll have to explain everything and I'm not sure I have the energy to…

"You must be Kyla." My mom says like it's no big deal.

Kyla and I, on the other hand, both go slack jawed.

What the fuck?

When did my mother get psychic?

She could be the next Miss Cleo!

I'm still in shock when the backdoor opens again and Ashley walks into the kitchen.

Whoa!

Now I'm double shocked!

Double shocked?

Is that even an expression?

Shell shocked!

That's what I meant.

When did she get here?

And how come I didn't notice her car outside?

I don't ask her though because I can't speak at present as my mind tries to work out why Ashley is at my parents' house.

Wow!

Talk about an awkward situation!

Ashley seems even more upset than when she left earlier; Kyla looks like she wants to flee and I'm utterly confused.

"Thanks for listening," Ashley says to my mom and then she gives her a hug.

Huh?

Nothing is making sense.

"Anytime, Ashley, you know you're always welcome here," my mom replies sweetly. She gives Ashley another hug and I'd be marveling at the bonding going on if I wasn't so out of sorts.

Ashley walks over to me while ignoring Kyla completely. "I'll see you at home." She gives me a peck on the cheek and then she's gone.

Say what?

Can someone please explain to me what in the blue hell is happening?

"Would you like a something drink?" my mom asks Kyla before she motions for her to sit down.

"I'm ok, thanks," Kyla responds, but she does take a seat at the kitchen table. She seems to be on the verge of tears again and I don't know what to do anymore.

"It's not a problem," my mom says as she puts her arm around my shoulder.

I look at her like she's gone mad. "What's not a problem?"

My mom gives me a kiss on the forehead, "Kyla can stay here while you help Ashley deal with this new development in your lives."

There are many things I question in life.

Many deep philosophical quandaries that keep me up at night

Like why do we park on a driveway but drive on a parkway?

Things of that nature.

But one thing I don't question is the indisputable evidence that I have the world's best mother.

Seriously.

It's not even a close contest.

She rocks on so many levels!

So many levels!

One day I'll ask her how she's figured out everything without me explaining it to her. That will have to wait though for a day when my fiancé isn't near a breaking point.

"You're the best!" I exclaim before giving my mom a huge hug. She deserves it. "I'll call you later."

My mom gives my shoulder a reassuring squeeze. "Good luck, and if you need anything let me know."

I hug my mom again before turning to Kyla. "I'll call you later as well. Don't worry, we'll get this all sorted out soon enough."

"I hope you're right," Kyla replies sounding a tad dejected.

I can't blame her for feeling that way.

But now it's Super Spencer off to the rescue!

And Super Spencer always comes out victorious.

Always!

Just as I open the front door I hear my mom ask Kyla if she plays Scrabble and the enthusiastic yes she gets in response makes me feel better about leaving those two alone together.

Who knew they both had such nerdish tendencies!

What?

At least they won't be bored!

As I start the Spencermobile a pit forms in my stomach.

Now it's time to face the firing squad.

And by firing squad I mean Ashley.

Uh oh.

I have a feeling this isn't going to pretty.

Not pretty at all!


	12. Chapter 12

**A/N Double update as promised, look for Chapter 13 right after this one. I will be back tomorrow with another chapter. I hope you're all having a good weekend!**

Chapter 12

I've been sitting inside the Spencermobile for the past fifteen minutes. That's about the time I arrived home, and I've been too scared to go in ever since.

I'm worried about the kind of state Ashley is in. Sure, she spent some time with my mom, but I'm not sure if that means she's willing to calmly discuss the implications of Kyla's existence and how it's affecting her.

Wow!

That was a lucid and clear thought.

I knew nothing good could come out of being sex deprived!

What?

Ok, ok, I shouldn't be thinking of my libido when there are more important matters at hand.

Sheesh!

I was only joking anyways!

Sort of.

Back to my point...

I have a feeling that Ashley's mood will be rather dark and she'll need me to be a rock of support for her.

I'm totally the woman for that job!

Yeah I am!

Because nobody gets my girl like I do.

Nobody!

It's time for team Spashley to come together like we've never come together before!

And I don't even mean that in a dirty way!

Honest!

Go Team Spashley go!

Woo!

I think that little pep talk is exactly what I had to have to get ready to face the music. Now I'm confident that, even if Ashley is in the foulest of moods, or if she breaks down in tears, or if she yells, I'll be able to handle it.

I wonder which of those three reactions she'll have.

I guess there's only one way to find out.

Boo!

Hiss!

I'm still scared!

Ok, ok, I can't be a pussy about this.

Whoa!

I just said pussy!

You know you're just stalling.

Shut up, voice, I don't need you to point out the obvious!

No need to get pissy with me, young lady!

Fuck this!

Instead of arguing with myself, I'm going to check to make sure my fiancé is ok. She's probably distraught and I'm out here acting like a jackass when I should be comforting her.

Idiot!

Relax, I know I'm not really an idiot; I'm just having a moment.

Moment's over.

Yes, voice, I know. That's why I'm in the process of walking to the front door.

Yowzers!

I'm really worried!

Perhaps I should have gotten some tissues to deal with the tears that my dear girl must be shedding.

No more stalling woman!

Fine!

This is it!

Here we go!

Ah!

I slowly open the door and I'm greeted with silence.

That's a good sign.

Right?

Wait a minute!

It's a little too quiet for my liking!

Hmmmm, after a cursory look around the main floor it doesn't appear that anything is out of place. Nothing appears to be out of order, and I don't see or hear a crying Ashley.

Those are all good things.

I suppose.

But that doesn't explain where my girl is. I know for sure she's home because this time I did notice her car in the driveway.

I take a few steps inside, after closing and locking the door, and then I feel a pair of hands grab me by the shoulders.

Oh my god!

Who just grabbed me?

Oh my god!

I don't even get a chance to scream before I feel a pair of lips, a familiar pair that is, nibble on my ear.

"I thought you'd never get home," Ashley breathes directly into my ear which in turn makes my toes curl.

Whoa!

This is not the kind of reaction I was expecting.

My head is in a tizzy so I'm not quite sure what I'm supposed to do now. "Uh…"

"I haven't forgotten that I owe you one and I'm a woman who always repays her debts," Ashley whispers before she nips on my earlobe again.

Oh god!

She's so fucking sexy!

Oh god!

I certainly underestimated Ashley's reaction to Kyla existence. It would seem she's handling the news very well.

Fuck yeah she is!

Ashley flips me around before slamming me against the door that I just closed.

Don't worry, I don't feel any pain!

None!

Cause all I'm feeling right now is a party in my pants.

And Ashley is the only one who's invited!

Yay!

Ashley moves in close so there's not much space between us. "And there's no time like the present to start my repayment plan."

Oh god!

I'm pretty sure my eyes rolled back in my head.

I can't properly explain how utterly sexy Ashley is this second.

No words are available in my vocabulary for me to describe how her eyes convey to me what she's not saying out loud.

Oh god!

She wants me so bad!

Well you know what, Ash? The feeling is so fucking mutual!

Oh god!

Her hands are up my top and her mouth is sucking on my neck in an instant.

Oh god!

She makes me feel incredibly good!

I'm about to hit the jackpot!

Woo hoo!

Are you crazy?

Ashley's hand circles my breast and I let out a moan so she understands how much I'm enjoying what she's doing.

I said are you crazy?

Who the fuck is that?

You know who this is!

Damn it!

I'm not listening!

You're going to listen because you cannot, for any reason, have sex with Ashley right now.

What?

You heard me, young lady!

Ashley's hand leaves my breast and heads straight for my pants.

Oh god!

Your girlfriend has just had the shock of her life, she needs you…

Oh god!

I need her more!

Spencer Carlin!

Deep down you know that sex with Ashley is not the most responsible or the right thing to do. You have to get her to talk to you and explain why she left, why she went to see your mom and why she is trying to distract you instead of opening up.

Double damn it!

I can't believe my mind can have a coherent thought when Ashley's fingers are teasing my bare midriff.

Oh god!

I'm being tested in a way I've never been tested before!

Ok, ok, that might be a tad dramatic but you don't understand how hard this is going to be for me. I'm giving up sex with Ashley.

Holy fuck!

I didn't think this day would ever come!

And I certainly won't be!

However, my girl needs me more than I need the sweet, sweet release only she can give me.

Dang!

I'm such a saint for doing this!

Enough about me though, it's time for me to get serious.

"Ash," I say as I try to get out of her clutches. "Ash, we have…"

I don't get to finish what I had planned in my head because Ashley decided to silence me with her lips.

Oh god!

She's such a fantastic kisser!

What was I supposed to do again?

Her tongue enters my mouth and fireworks go off in my head.

No!

No!

No!

I can't get distracted here!

Even though I want to more than you can imagine.

I somehow find the willpower to stop kissing Ashley but that doesn't deter her at all. She decides to head back to my neck and right to the spot that makes me shudder every time.

Every time!

Oh god!

She's playing dirty and it's so not the right time for that.

"Ash, stop," I say as I manage to get her away from me.

When my eyes refocus I see an out of breath Ashley glaring in my direction. "What's wrong with you?"

"Nothing is wrong with me," I assure her as I readjust my clothes. "The better question is what is wrong with you?"

Oh, I so didn't mean for that to sound confrontational.

I'm not really off to the best start in regards to being there for Ashley.

Hopefully she didn't notice how…

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?" Ashley asks in a harsh tone.

Uh oh.

I guess I deserved that.

I take a deep breath to regroup. "Look, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to…"

"Just forget it," Ashley cuts me off and then she leaves me alone in our entrance way.

I understand that she's upset but I really don't like it when someone walks away from me like she just did.

Spencer don't play that!

I find Ashley in the kitchen and in the time it took me to find her I came to the realization that this isn't about me so I'm not going to lose my cool because of my own feelings. What Ashley needs is for me to listen, console and be there for her.

I take another couple of deep breaths and then I make my approach.

"Save it Spencer!" Ashley exclaims before I have a chance to announce my arrival on the scene.

Ok.

So… things seem to be going horribly wrong.

When Ashley has her defenses up like this it's really hard for me, or anyone for that matter, to break them down. It's been awhile since I've seen her this upset and I forget how closed off she can be.

But I also know that she has this amazing capacity to be open, honest and completely vulnerable with me. It took time, patience and work on both our parts for our relationship to reach that point so I'm not going to let anyone or anything undo the foundation we've built.

We built that foundation together and we're going to get through this bump in the road together.

Now all I need to do is help Ashley reach the same conclusion.

"I know you're upset," I say as I take a seat next at the kitchen table next to Ashley. I put my hand over hers but I can't get her to look at me. "And you have every right to be." I think I hear Ashley snort but I ignore the noise and continue. "I can only imagine how shocked you are, but…"

"That's right! You can only imagine what I'm feeling," Ashley snaps and I cringe at the bitterness in her voice. "You really have no clue what this is like for me and you can't possibly grasp how much I'm hurting."

I have to be honest here.

I really thought after seeing Ashley with my mom that she'd somehow calmed down. The two of them have a really special bond and, while I am a little bothered that Ashley fled to her instead of letting me in to what she's feeling, I don't begrudge her in the slightest.

Plus, Ashley even appeared calmer when I saw her there, so I'm not quite sure what happened between there and here to cause her to get riled up again.

It's my job to find out though.

And that's exactly what I plan on doing.

I touch her cheek with the palm of my hand. "I might not understand what you're feeling, Ash, but I love you a whole lot." Her eyes soften which makes me relieved because I hate seeing them so cold. My relief doesn't last long because soon enough they're tearing up.

"Don't," Ashley whispers and I'm not sure what she means.

"Don't what?" I whisper back as I try to bring her in for a hug.

I don't get the chance though because Ashley's on her feet before I can stop her. "Just leave me alone." Her eyes have gone cold again and that makes me quite anxious. "I need to deal with this myself."

She goes to walk away a second time but this time I grab her wrist. "No." I flinch a little when she snaps her head back but I refuse to let go. "I'm not letting you shut me out. Not now and not when that's the last thing you need."

Ashley may be stubborn, but nobody, and I do mean nobody, is as stubborn as I am.

So she better prepare herself because I'm not backing down.

And if it's going to take us fighting for Ashley to realize that she isn't dealing with this without me, then so be it.

Because that's exactly what she's going to get.


	13. Chapter 13

Chapter 13

I must say, I haven't been this worked up in a very long time.

Too bad it's not the kind of worked up that involves a naked Ashley.

That's my favorite kind of worked up!

Obviously.

I hope my sexual frustration doesn't make me overreact.

I kind of feel like I'm on the edge of getting really mad as I stare unblinkingly at a certain brunette hottie.

She's just as stubborn as me.

Ok, ok we all know I'm the most stubborn out of the two of us.

But that's neither here nor there.

What's important is I'm afraid I'm going to lose my temper in a way that won't be productive or useful. I get that Ashley needs me to be there for her. In order for that to happen though, she has to let me in and not shut me out.

It's imperative!

And because I've felt a little left out today, there's a chance I'm going to act irrationally. Which I know comes as a _big_ surprise to you people.

I'm ashamed to admit that I almost feel like 'The Hulk'-that's how out of sorts I am.

Spencer mad!

Spencer not happy with girlfriend!

Spencer destroy Los Angeles!

Grrrrrrrr!

Whoa!

Whoa!

Whoa!

I better get myself together!

If I blow, then I might severely dampen my chances of helping Ashley through this crisis. And at the end of the day she's the one I'm truly concerned about.

She's my number one priority, not my own feelings about how Kyla's appearance has affected me. That's not what I need to focus on, my girl is where my attention needs to be.

And that's exactly where it's going to stay no matter how fuckable she looks.

Oops.

Did I just think that out loud in my head?

Did that sentence even make any sense?

Is there a reason why I'm asking pointless and not at all important questions instead of fixing this situation?

Damn, I've distracted myself so much I can't remember where I was.

Stupid overactive brain!

Oh, yeah, right. My sexy as hell fiance is going through something big and it's my job to help her in any way that I can.

"Let go of me!" Ashley commands as she tries to get out of the vice like grip I have on her wrist. "Why the hell aren't you listening to me?" she bellows when I don't give in to her demand for space.

While I do like playing rough with Ashley when the time is appropriate, now isn't that time. I release her from my hand but I quickly move in front of her to block her from running away from this.

And from me.

She lets out a few choice words but when Ashley realizes I'm not giving into her she relents a little. The tips of her ears are bright red though and that only happens when she's really angry.

Oh well!

She can get angry with me all she wants, but that doesn't change the fact that she needs to stop shutting me out.

"I'm not moving," I tell her forcefully. "And you're not going anywhere until you open up to me."

I wonder if somewhere beneath all the pain Ashley is experiencing, she finds my in control side sexy?

So not the time!

Ashley's eyes soften a bit, but I can tell her defenses are still way up. "I can't, Spence," she says in a much calmer voice than a few seconds ago. "I know you want to help and be there for me and all of that."

"I do," I interject as I move closer to her. "Let me help."

"That's just it," Ashley snaps before I can get another word in. "You can't, not right now. I get that you don't want to hear that, but please, just let me have some time to process everything."

Her request sounds reasonable on some level. But after the disappearing act she pulled this morning I don't know if I can take a step back and let her go wherever it is she wants to go.

It pains me to admit this, but her taking off has created just the teeny tiniest little kernel of something in my mind. I'm not sure what that something is exactly, but I am sure it's not a good thing.

"Are you leaving again?" I ask, sounding a lot more vulnerable and anxious than I meant to sound.

Ashley closes the gap between us instantly, "Spence..." she says my name with a mixture of concern and anxiety in her voice. "This isn't about us, this is about me and I need time to process everything that's happened today."

I relish in Ashley's touch when she caresses my face. "I know." I sound unconvincing even to me but I can't help myself. I don't doubt Ashley's love or commitment to me one bit, I really don't. When things got intense this morning though the first thing she did was run and I can't help but worry about what that means in the long term. I don't want to have these concerns but I do.

"Spence," Ashley repeats my name and she also makes sure I'm looking her right in the eye. "I promise I will talk to you about everything, but I can't right now and I hope you'll understand where I'm coming from." I do understand but that doesn't make me feel less anxious. "I mean I woke up this morning thinking my day would be spent having sex with you and not letting you put clothes on and then my whole world got turned upside down."

I can't help but smile and Ashley's attempt at humor and she does too. "I guess you have a point there," I admit. I can't even imagine what she must be going through and thankfully that's not anything I have to worry about. "I just want to help, that's all."

"I know you do, baby," Ashley replies before pulling me in for a hug. "I don't think you can though, not right now." She pulls back so we're making eye contact again. "When I'm ready to talk you will be the first person I unload everything on."

"You better!" I order, and I can't help but give her a little bit of a head tilt. "Otherwise I'm going to start thinking you and my mother are more than friends."

Oh!

Ew!

I shouldn't have said that out loud!

That's disgusting!

Ashley chuckles as she places a soft kiss on my forehead. "It's good to know your sense of humor hasn't changed one bit."

I know Ashley needs her space but I can't help myself when I go in for another hug. She's too huggable to let go just yet! "I love you and whatever you need to do, you have my support."

Ashley squeezes extra tight, "You have no idea what that means to me." She holds on for a few minutes before continuing. "I love you too. I really do and knowing that you're in my corner means the world to me."

Aw!

Even in a crisis she can make me swoon!

After a few minutes she finally lets me go but not before I get a few kisses from the best kisser in the world.

It's true!

She totally is!

"I'm going to head downstairs," Ashley informs me and then she's gone.

I watch her hot ass walk away from me and I'm not quite sure how I'm feeling.

I'm happy she's not running out the house like before.

I'm not happy she's going through all of this.

I'm happy that she's eventually going to open up to me.

I'm not happy she's probably going to spend the next few hours wallowing in her troubles.

Conflicted feelings, thy name is Spencer!

There's really only one thing I can do to distract myself.

Only one thing that can relieve the tension that's creeped into my house.

Just one thing that will take my mind off what plagues me.

No!

Not that!

Geez how sex crazed do you think I am?

Never mind, don't answer that.

What I'm actually going to do is pop in a few episodes of one of the best TV shows ever created to distract me.

_Buffy_ here I come!

* * *

So, I'm two hours into my impromptu _Buffy _marathon and my stunning bride-to-be still hasn't made an appearance.

I've had to stop myself a few times from going to find out how she's doing.

It's so hard not to interfere!

I'm exhausted!

Perhaps I should take a nap to pass the time.

And perhaps I should ask a certain brunette to join me?

Ok, ok, even I know that's not a good idea.

My nap dilemma is put on hold though when the phone rings.

"Hello," I answer without looking at who's calling.

"Hey Spence," Jessie replies like she's in amazing mood. Lucky! "How's it going?"

Oh Ms. James, what a loaded question that is!

"It's going ok," I lie. I don't have the energy to give her an actual answer. "Nothing new and exciting to report."

I'm so going to hell.

That's ok, most of the people I know will be there with me.

Just kidding!

Sort of.

"That's cool," Jessie says as I try to figure out a way to get her off the phone as quickly as possible. I love my friend, but I'm not in the mood to chat. "I was just calling to find out what time you want Melissa and me over tonight?"

I don't have plans with Jessie and Melissa tonight.

Wait a tick.

I totally do!

Crap!

Double crap!

That completely slipped my mind.

Triple crap!

As if I didn't have enough to deal with!

I have no clue how to cancel my plans without pissing my friend off. "Uhm..."

"Spencer!" Jessie shouts into the phone. "I can't believe you're canceling on me!"

Wow, she sounds annoyed.

And I guess I would be to if I was in her shoes.

That doesn't change the fact that I am indeed about to kibosh our evening together.

Can anyone blame me?

These are special circumstances and Jessie will have to understand.

"I'm sorry," I say without trying to come across as defensive. "But Ashley just found out that her dad had another child...she showed up today out of the blue and she brought along Ashley's bitch of a mother to break the news." I take a deep breath before going on, "Then my girlfriend took off...I had no idea where she went... I had to figure out a place for Kyla to stay - - Kyla is Ashley's sister's name by the way - - and now that she's staying at my mom's, I'm waiting for Ashley to come to me and we can talk this through."

Whew!

Now that was a mouthful!

Jessie has gone quiet.

I wonder if we got disconnected?

"Hello?" It sounds like she's still on the line but I'm not sure.

"You know, Carlin, if you wanted to bail on our plans you didn't have to concoct some outlandish story, you could have just told me the truth." Jessie finally says.

"I"m not making anything up!" I exclaim.

I'm innocent!

Innocent I tell you!

Ok, ok, that's not at all true but in this case it is.

A few seconds before Jessie speak again. "Seriously? You're not pulling my chain?"

I sigh loud enough for her to hear, "No, I'm not. I've had a hell of a day and I don't think my night is going to get any better."

Jessie lets out a long whistle. "My god, Spence, how is Ashley doing?"

All of a sudden I realize I probably shouldn't have said anything to Jessie about Kyla and her sudden appearance in our lives.

I trust her completely but maybe Ashley wants to keep it on the down low until she's not as devastated by her existence.

There's nothing I can do now though except make Jessie swear she won't tell anyone the news I've shared with her.

I know she won't have a problem agreeing to that

"Not good," I admit freely. "Not good at all."

"No kidding, she must be reeling from shock," Jessie surmises correctly.

I suddenly feel the need to go check on Ashley, "Look, Jessie..."

"You don't have to worry, I won't say a thing to anyone." Jessie promises making me feel slightly better.

I thank her and then hang up the call.

Not knowing where Ashley's head is at is killing me.

I don't want to break a pledge I made to her but I don't think I have a choice.

I head downstairs to our recording studio and then I knock on the door a few times. Ashley doesn't tell me to come in and being the persistent person I am, I don't go away; instead I slowly open the door.

I see Ashley sitting at the piano and her back is to me.

I think about calling out her name but then I notice that her body is shaking a little.

Without a second thought I rush over to her.

She turns her head when she hears me approaching and that's when I see the reason why her body is shaking.

Tears are streaming down her face, and I can only imagine how long she's been crying.

I don't hesitate to wrap my arms around her because all I want to do is take her pain away. If I could actually do that I would but the best I can offer is comfort.

Ashley latches onto me and her tears start to flow more freely.

"It's going to be ok," I whisper in her ear.

But I don't think that's true at all.

In fact I'm almost sure that things won't be ok or back to normal for a long time.


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter 14

For the most part there is nothing I love more than having my girl in my arms.

There was a time when I thought I'd never get to experience such an amazing feeling. I used to lie awake at night and try and imagine how utterly wonderful it would feel to have my arms wrapped around Ashley.

I can honestly say that nothing my mind ever thought up comes even remotely close to how my body and my emotions react to having her so close to me.

It's such a powerful experience, and for once I'm not exaggerating.

Not at all.

But right now I'd love to be doing anything besides cuddling with Ashley on our couch.

That might sound out of character, so let me explain myself.

It took a while for Ashley's tears to subside. She wasn't sobbing, but they wouldn't stop coming. It was so heartbreaking for me to see her like that and I can't even begin to understand what she must be going through.

Eventually I was able to coax her into coming upstairs with me. I tried to convince her that she should eat something, but Ashley said she wasn't hungry. I didn't want to push the issue and that's how we ended up on the couch in our den.

She immediately curled up into my body, and she hasn't moved since.

Ashley isn't crying anymore but I can feel her anguish.

It's pouring out of her without her uttering one single word.

There's no possible way for me to fully comprehend what is going on in her head, but I can't lie and say that I wish she'd let me try.

Clearly Ashley isn't running away, but that doesn't mean she's letting me in either.

Maybe I'm being unfair having these expectations. There have been many moments in my life where I've been in pain and I know it's so tempting, and in some ways easier, to shut people out.

In the long run that's the completely wrong thing to do.

Nothing good can come from keeping one's feelings bottled up.

I know my girl well enough, and if I push her like I did earlier, she'll just shut down even more than she has already.

I wish more than anything that I could take this sadness that she's feeling away from her.

I really, really do.

I hate seeing Ashley in any kind of pain.

Except one kind of pain, but that's something I'm sure nobody is interested in hearing about. Plus, it's really not the right moment to be discussing such private matters.

"I love you," I whisper in Ashley's ear. I have a feeling that's exactly what she needs to hear. I definitely tell her enough, but right now I know she needs me to verbalize what's in my heart. "Always," I add for good measure.

My declaration of love doesn't result in Ashley actually responding with words. I do however get squeezed just that much tighter from my brown eyed beauty.

Unlike her, that's more than enough for me right now.

I can't help letting out a sigh though.

I don't mean to, but my brain is so full that I can't control myself.

There are so many thoughts I have about this situation that I could never say out loud.

Not only because that's not what's best for Ashley but also because it's not really my place to put my two cents in.

You have absolutely no idea how hard it is for me to keep my opinions inside my head.

But I have good reasons for shutting my mouth.

None of what's happening is about me. Except of course the fact that the woman I love is in crisis, but in the grand scheme of things this is about her.

It affects me sure, but I'm not the central figure in this story.

Ok, ok, I'm totally the central figure in _this_ story, but hopefully you get where I'm coming from.

I'm sure I'm probably boring you with my thoughts. That's all I've got at the present moment because Ashley has gone all _Marcel Marceau _on me and I have no other choice but to try and process the last few hours on my own.

I can only guess how many conflicting emotions my girl must have swarming through her mind as she lays in my arms.

And despite how badly she's reacted to the news of Kyla's existence, I know that she hasn't fully grasped how her presence is going to change things.

Whatever Ashley thought about her father and their relationship has to feel like a lie to her. He obviously knew he had another daughter but never shared that news with the one child he did acknowledge.

If I wasn't afraid of Ashley's reaction I might point out that in some ways she had it better than Kyla. At least she knew her father as more than just a rock icon. At least she has some memories of him in her childhood. At least she had a relationship with him, even if that relationship wasn't anything to write home about.

But I am in no position to point those things out as of yet.

Or ever.

There's also the issue of Ashley being mad at the wrong person.

She's taken all of her anger out on Kyla when she's for all intents and purposes an innocent bystander in this mess.

Just like Ashley.

Unfortunately I don't think my love sees it like I do.

That makes sense though because I can a bit more objective about what's going on than she can.

There are no real villains here-it's not a black and white situation.

I take that back.

Do I ever take that back!

There is a villain in this tale and that's a certain woman called Bitch Mom. If anyone is to be blamed for how things have played out today, it's her.

Any normal and caring mother would not have introduced long lost siblings like B.M. did.

There's just no way to justify how she sprung Kyla on Ashley. And that's one of my reasons why if I had the chance, I'd really teach that horrible woman a lesson she'd never forget.

Fuck yeah I would!

Oops, I'm getting worked up in the wrong kind of way.

I love everything about Ashley but there's no arguing that some, if not most, of her hang ups are because her mother is a vapid, unfeeling, shell of a woman.

I can't think about her anymore because then I'll start to get really mad again and that's not where I should be focusing my energy at present.

While I don't think Ashley's dad meant for things to turn out like this, he also bears some of the responsibility for how upset both his daughters are.

I'm sure Kyla must be reeling from finding out she's related to two famous celebrities and then to have her reveal turn out so badly.

But I'm almost positive that there's no way Ashley is feeling one ounce of sympathy for her younger sister.

Ok, that still sounds weird.

Moving on...

I'm sure Kyla is the one my girl is blaming when it's not her fault at all.

I'm sure she's finding a sympathetic ear with my mother, but that doesn't mean she's not suffering.

She's in a strange city, staying at stranger's house and her sister won't even acknowledge her existence.

All in all, Kyla's got it pretty shitty as well.

I wish I knew what to do here.

I wish I knew how to make everything better.

I wish I knew what's going to happen next.

No amount of wishing is going to make this go away though.

Too bad!

That would be awesome!

If I had a super power like that I'd totally use it for good not evil!

Doesn't Super Spencer sound like an awesome name for a superhero?

By day I would be a sexy nobody and by night I'd fight crime.

The bad guys wouldn't stand a chance!

They'd be quivering in their boots!

Why do bad guys wear boots anyway?

Who cares!

It would be even better if I had x-ray vision so no matter what Ashley was wearing she'd look naked to me.

Oh my god!

My brains come up with the best ideas!

Good lord!

How the hell did my brain get so off course?

I'll have to put that superhero idea on the back burner until a more appropriate time.

Because I'm almost certain Ashley will enjoy me dressing up in cool outfit with a cape.

In fact I know she would!

This one time at Halloween I dressed up as a vampire and one thing lead to another...

Curses!

There I go getting distracted again.

It's really hard being me sometimes!

Ok, ok, not really but I felt like being a bit dramatic.

Sue me!

"Are you ok if we just head to bed?" Ashley asks. It's the first thing she's said to me in a couple of hours.

I almost forgot how sultry her voice is!

That would have been tragic!

Not just found out you had a long lost sister tragic, but close enough.

I look into her eyes and all other thoughts I've been having immediately stop.

I think my heart just broke all over again.

She looks so sad!

And tired!

And completely worn out!

And not in a six-hour sex marathon kind of way!

"Whatever you want," I reply before I place the softest of kisses on her lips.

Despite my sometimes sex crazed brain there's no ulterior motive for my kiss.

I just want Ashley to know I'm going to be here for her no matter what.

Silence descends upon us once again as we make our way up the stairs.

Each of us goes through our night time rituals without speaking, but my eyes never really leave Ashley. She seems to be moving on auto pilot.

Minutes later we're under the covers and Ashley is back in my arms.

Normally I'm the one cuddled close to her but obviously now she needs me to be strong one.

And I have no plans to let her down.

We've both had one hell of day and that might be the understatement of the century.

Despite everything that's happened, I'm wide awake.

I think my concern for my girlfriend is keeping me from falling asleep.

Or it could be the four cups of coffee I had earlier.

Who knows?

I hope Ashley can get some rest because she's the one who's been through something traumatic today.

Maybe in her sleep she'll find the peace she can't really find right now while she's awake.

Her breathing sounds even and steady.

Just when I think she might actually be asleep she readjusts her body she's looking right at me.

I can't really see her in great detail, but my eyes have adjusted enough in the dark that I know she's focusing all her attention on me.

"You ok?" I ask as I cup her face in the palm of my hand.

"Not really," Ashley admits quietly. She turns her head and then she places a kiss on the palm of my hand. "Thank you for helping me through this."

I sit up more because it seems like we're about to have some sort of conversation.

Yay!

Progress!

I think!

And hope!

"You're not allowed to thank me," I tell her in no uncertain terms. "I'm here for you because I love you and you're the most important person in my life."

"I can't help it," Ashley replies before she places her hand in mine. "I feel like I should be apologizing because my fucked up life is taking over yours."

I thread Ashley's fingers in mine and give her hand a little squeeze. "I mean this in the nicest way possible...but have you lost your ever loving mind?"

I'm not trying to be harsh!

Honest!

It's just that has to be one of the stupidest things my very smart girlfriend has ever said to me!

"We're a 'we' now, so you're stuff is my stuff!" I exclaim louder than I intended. "And what's this 'fucked up life' crap?"

Uh oh.

I cannot let Angry Spencer some out to play.

"God, I suck," Ashley sighs, but she continues before I can react to her self imposed put down. "None of this is coming out right."

I so want to interject but I really want Ashley to express what she's feeling.

"All I meant is that I know this can't be fun for you and I'm really sorry my soap opera family drama is messing things up for you too," she explains.

That makes some sense I suppose.

It doesn't mean that I'm going to let her take the blame for something that isn't her fault.

"You're not allowed to apologize, Ash," I say gently so I don't put her on the defensive. "I don't think you woke up this morning and thought 'Wow, my life doesn't have nearly enough drama in it, so how about I add a half-sister I know nothing about to the mix to see how much fun that's going to be.'"

I hold my breath for a second because I think I might have made an in appropriate joke.

Damn me and my unbelievably good sense of humor!

But then I hear her let out a little bit of a chuckle and I breathe a huge sense of relief.

It's not the loudest laugh she's ever had, but it is a start.

"I guess you have a point there." Ashley's voice sounds the lightest I've heard it in hours.

"Whatever happens, we'll figure it out," I assure her. "We're in this together, and that's just the way it is."

Ashley pushes us back into our previous cuddling position and I feel her relax into me. "And that means the world to me."

It's the last things she says before we both pass out from the stress of the day.

I thought I wasn't tired but I guess I was wrong.

There's a first time for everything!

* * *

It's the next morning and I'm all alone again.

Don't get your knickers in a knot, Ashley hasn't fled for parts unknown.

No, I suggested she head to the studio so she could get out of the house and the memories of yesterday. Even though she's not looking to record a new album I know she likes working with new musicians and I'm almost sure it will help distract her.

Normally I'd use my hot body, but I don't that would work right now.

I know!

I'm sad too!

Boo!

Hiss!

I'm just about to sit down to eat breakfast when the doorbell rings.

I hope it's a girl scout!

I'm so in the mood for some Thin Mints!

Yum!

I open the door and it's safe to say I'm extremely disappointed.

"What the hell do you want?" I ask my disheveled looking brother.

Just because Ashley discovered she had a long lost sibling it doesn't mean I'm ready to forgive mine for that pathetic barbeque performance he put on.

Ass-eyes!

"I need to talk to you," Glen replies as he pushes his way inside.

Rude much!

I never invited him in!

"If you're here to apologize, come back another time," I tell him forcefully.

My forgiveness level is at an all time low.

He ignores me and then he bursts into tears. "I've fucked up so bad."

I feel a slight tugging at my heart strings.

Damn him!

I hate seeing my brother upset!

"I've lost Aiden and I don't think there's anyway for me to get him back," Glen continues and the tears he's shedding come out faster.

I've seen so much crying in the last day or so.

Not a good statistic.

At least Glen is admitting he's not over Aiden and wants him back.

"Then why did you break up with him?" I ask.

It's a very good question!

And it's one I've been wanting to know the answer to for months.

Glen lets out a few sniffles, "Because I didn't want him to know that I cheated on him." He bursts into tears again and his whole body is shaking.

Say what?

I was so not prepared for that answer.

He did what to Aiden?

My brother is so many things but I never would have thought he'd cheat on the man of his dreams?

My mouth is open but I can't get any words out.

"I've been such an asshole," Glen cries out.

That you have, Captain Obvious!

What a fucking jerk!

"I've pushed everyone away because I was so scared to admit the truth," Glen says to explain his weird behavior over the last little while. "When Aiden proposed I panicked and then one thing led to another..."

"Are you fucking kidding me?" I snap before he can go on.

I have a sneaking suspicion that my residual anger from yesterday is about to come out.

Big time!

Big, big time!

"One thing never leads to another!" I exclaim without caring that my brother is hurting.

I have no capacity to feel any kind of sympathy for him at this moment.

None.

Not one single smidgen of empathy.

"All this time I defended you to Ashley" I am clenching my fists so hard, "I told her that something must have happened between you two that we didn't know and it wasn't our place to judge either one of you."

Idiot!

Dummy!

What was I thinking?

I poke my brother in the chest, " And it turns out you're a douche bag who can't keep it in his pants!"

Wow, screaming at Glen is actually a bit therapeutic for me.

"You don't understand!" Glen wails. "I didn't want to cheat on him but I was terrified of getting married..."

"Oh boo fucking hoo," I cut in. "Then don't get married! But instead you chose to do something so incredibly selfish."

I don't think I even know the person standing in front of me.

He certainly doesn't act like the Glen I know.

"Then you broke up with Aiden and have acted like a jerk to him ever since." I am very close to slapping my brother across the face. Maybe it will knock some sense into him. "Explain to me why I'm supposed to help you out of this mess?"

Glen has the gall to look offended. "You don't have to be so judgmental!"

Oh hell no!

I don't care if I'm overreacting, he has no right to be anything but contrite.

"You have no clue what it's like to make such a big mistake," Glen continues his self pity rant. "Every day I regret what I did. You can't know what it's like to live your life like that!"

"You're right, I can't," I agree. "But that's because I would never, ever act like you did."

I can say that with confidence.

I know what it's like to be cheated on and I can't ever imagine a scenario where I would do anything remotely like that to Ashley.

I'm not perfect but I am sure of what I'm saying.

"Spencer!" My brother starts crying again.

I'm having none of it though.

"When you've grown up, maybe I'll listen to you," I tell him as I open the door. "Until then I think you need to leave."

Some people might think I'm being heartless and maybe I am.

I don't have the time for Glen when I have much bigger things to deal with.

He made this mess himself and it's going to be up to him to fix it.

If he can.

I don't have much confidence of that because of the way he stomps out of my house.

He's acting like a child and that's what got him into this mess.

Glen's confession has made my head spin.

Thanks a lot!

I only hope that by the time Ashley returns I'm calm again.

Because the way she's feeling I think her finding out that Glen cheated on Aiden might set her off in a way that would result in my brother having a big black eye.

Hmmmm...

Maybe that's not such a bad thing after all.


	15. Chapter 15

**A/N I'm quickly running out of updates but I am still writing for this. I'll be back tomorrow with another chapter. Happy Monday if that's at all possible :)**

Chapter 15

I'm bored.

And pissed off.

And worried.

And anxious.

And concerned

And horny.

Oops.

How did that last one get in there?

I have no idea!

Ashley's still at the recording studio, and I'm still reeling from my brother's visit.

I can't believe he cheated on Aiden!

Color me totally shocked!

I knew they were having issues, but I never thought it would reach the point it obviously did. While I think what Glen did was scummy he's still my brother. Once I've calmed down I guess I am sort of obligated to talk to him and find out what is going on in that dumb head of his.

On the other hand I am totally going to strangle his giant neck because of the predicament he's put me in.

To tell Ashley, or not to tell Ashley.

That is the question.

The big giant question that's given me a whole other reason to have the stomach rumblies.

Like I need another one!

Long lost, illegitimate sisters should be reason enough.

Who's with me?

I really don't think Ashley needs the stress of knowing about stupid Glen and his stupid unfaithful ways. I'm almost sure she'd feel compelled to tell Aiden or at the very least she'd struggle with the decision.

It's a tough call really and I know it's not a cut and dry issue.

Ugh!

Why is everything so hard all of a sudden?

Wasn't it just days ago that I was role playing my _Grease _fantasy?

It feels like forever since that glorious, multiple orgasm night.

Double ugh!

How unfair!

How utterly and completely unfair!

I suppose I can't really complain all that much. Life has been pretty good to me and I'm sure all this drama will pass soon enough.

Right?

Hello?

Anyone?

Damn it.

Oh well, there's nothing I can do right now but wait.

Wait for Ashley to come home.

Wait for my pizza that's in the oven to cook.

Wait for the drama to pass.

Wait until the appropriate moment to ravish my sexy girlfriend silly.

My word, I have a one track mind sometimes.

Or, you know, all the time.

A couple of hours pass and I'm still missing one hot brunette.

She's texted me a few times and that makes me feel better. We didn't have any kind of heart-to-heart chat via text message but at least she's not cutting herself off from me.

That's when she gets in trouble.

That's when we get in trouble.

And I'm happy to report that's not happening.

She did, however, mention that she's in the middle of a very intense recording session so it's likely that I'll be without her for a while longer.

Bummer!

Double bummer!

Did I mention I'm bored?

I try to think of something to do but I'm drawing a blank.

After a few more minutes of contemplation I decide to head to my parent's house. I haven't heard from my mom today and I want to make sure things are going ok with Kyla.

I mean she seemed nice enough but there is always a chance she's some deranged crazy person.

Oh my god!

What if that's the case?

No, no, no, I'm just letting my wild imagination get away from me.

But...

I said no!

Kyla is harmless...I hope...but I do think it's wise for me to head over there and get to know my future sister-in-law.

Not to mention getting to know Ashley's little sister might help me figure out a way to get her to do the same. I don't see that happening any time soon but a girl can hope.

Wow!

That's sounded so mature of me!

Go Spencer go!

Yo da bomb, girl!

Hell yeah I am!

I dance my way to my car in a pretty good mood. Even if matters in the Carlin-Davies household aren't perfect, it's nice to know I'm not letting it get me down.

Life can't always go the way we want it to and that's ok. It's how we respond to those challenges that speaks to our character.

Whoa!

I'm so profound!

Go me again!

If only I had someone with me to witness the positively amazing way I'm handling things.

I think I'm letting patting myself to much on the back, I should probably quit while I'm ahead. Because you know that it's only a matter of...

I am too busy trying to reign my mind in that I don't notice how close I am to our rose bushes.

Yeah we have rose bushes!

They're so pretty!

Speaking of bushes...

Oh man, my mind is so dirty!

As I was saying, I don't notice how close I am to our rose bushes and I end up falling right into them.

Oh my god!

Who knew rose bushes could be so thorny!

I didn't!

They've scratched me up!

Ow!

And nobody is here to kiss my wounds better!

Boo!

Hiss!

We're getting rid of those bushes as soon as possible!

I don't think that makes me a very good lesbian but whatever.

Instead of wallowing in self pity, I go back inside to clean myself up. Once I'm done, I hop into the Spencermobile and make my way over to my parents' house.

As I open the front door my earlier anxiety about Kyla being a homicidal maniac returns. I know I'm being illogical but I can't help myself.

It's awfully quiet inside and that makes my stomach clench.

Thankfully I hear my mom's voice coming from the kitchen moments later.

Whew!

That's a load off!

She's alive!

Yay!

I think about announcing my arrival formally but I decide instead to toss my keys in my purse and then place my purse carefully on the ground.

I'll surprise her!

And that sneaky Kyla just in case she's trying something funny.

What?

I quietly creep my way towards the kitchen.

I can be sneaky too!

I'm as quiet as a mou...

"Hello, Spencer," my mom says before she can see me.

How does she do that?

It was so annoying when I was in high school and I couldn't get away with anything!

I enter the kitchen with an innocent smile on my stunning face. "Hey, mom. How are you today?"

My mom gives me a look that makes me squirm a little.

Again I ask, how does she do that?

"Do you want to explain to me why you were sneaking in here?" she inquires without blinking.

"You're imagining things," I lie as I tilt my head a little.

I can't tell her what I was doing.

It would be embarrassing.

And we all know I've been embarrassed enough in my life. I don't need anymore.

Thank you very much!

You're welcome.

Who said that?

My mom purses her lips together but I can tell she's not going to push me further on the matter. "Do you want to tell me why you're here then?"

I hop up on a stool and shrug. "No reason, just wanted to say hi."

"Hi, Spencer."

Ok, that voice wasn't in my head.

I turn to my left and notice that Kyla is sitting right beside me.

Whoa.

Has she always been here?

Or was she creeping up on me?

You know what, I think I'm going to let my mind take a wee bit of a break. Instead of imagining things that aren't actually taking place, how about I just relax and stop the insanity.

"Hey, Kyla," I reply with a sincere smile.

She still looks a bit shell shocked and I can't say I'm surprised.

I don't know why but I think I'm developing quite the soft spot for this girl.

Maybe it's the fact that her eyes remind me a lot of Ashley's.

I wonder how else they're similar?

And I really don't mean that in any other way than how it came out.

I only have room in my heart for one Davies.

But I can show compassion to Kyla because she's just been thrown into an impossible situation.

My mom places a cup of chocolate milk on the counter right by me.

Aw!

She's so sweet!

Chocolate milk always makes me happy!

It's delicious!

"Thanks, Mrs. Carlin," Kyla says for some strange reason.

I don't have time to figure out why she's thanking my mom because I have some chocolate milk to drink.

Yummy!

"I've told you, Kyla, please call Paula," my mom replies so sweetly.

Aw!

I wish Ashley were here to witness this sweet moment.

"Ok, Paula," Kyla says with some reluctance.

Double aw!

I'm just about to grab the glass when someone else gets it first.

By someone, I'm referring to a certain brunette girl who clearly cannot be trusted.

What the heck?

I knew Kyla was trouble the second she walked into my house and interrupted sexy time with Ashley. I guess my beautiful fiance was right all along.

And the worst part of this tragedy? She doesn't even look sorry! Instead she's sipping away at my chocolate milk with a stupid smile on her face.

How fucking rude!

I'm just about to kick Kyla out of my mom's house when things get even more disturbing.

"And here are the chocolate chip cookies I made for you," my mom announces as she drops a plate filled with deliciousness in front of that diabolical genius.

Oh my god!

This is just unbelievable!

Somehow that vixen has brainwashed my mom into making her all of my favorite things.

What else has Kyla brainwashed my mom into doing?

I don't even want to know!

"You really didn't have to make a fuss," Kyla remarks like she's not evil.

But I know the truth!

It _is_ out there!

"Oh nonsense," my mom slaps Kyla's hand playfully and that makes me want to puke. "It's actually nice to have somebody to fuss over."

Hello!

I'm sitting right here!

Why can't you make a fuss over me!

Kyla looks grateful as she begins to munch on what should be my chocolate chip cookies.

She's the Cookie Monster!

That's who she is!

Actually, I just found out the other day that the Cookie Monster doesn't even eat cookies anymore. Isn't that just the stupidest thing you've ever heard?

Wait.

Where was I again?

Oh yeah, Kyla needs to leave and she needs to leave now.

"Did you want anything, Spence?" my mom asks once she's done fawning over her new house guest.

Finally!

Thanks for noticing I'm here mom!

"No, I'm fine," I pout.

I hope I'm making her feel bad for forgetting all about me.

I give Kyla and her the stink eye but I don't think anyone notices.

"I have to make a phone call," my mom announces and she doesn't seem the least bit fazed by my sulking. "I'll be back in a little while."

Whatever, Judas.

"Do you want a cookie?" Kyla asks after we're alone.

Et tu, Kyla?

Wait.

I think I'm getting my literary and biblical references mixed up.

Oh well.

I'm about to refuse but I'm sure that's what Kyla is hoping for. I decide to grab two cookies before she can change her mind.

Ha!

I could probably keep acting childish in my head all day but that wouldn't be very mature of me and I was on such a good streak today. Plus, I really do want Ashley and Kyla to start forging a relationship and that can't happen if I don't get involved somehow.

What?

It's true!

"How are you doing?" I inquire after I'm done chewing.

Kyla shrugs and that makes my heart clench. It's hard to stay mad at her for the cookie incident if she's going to look so sad. "I'm alright, I guess."

I put my hand on Kyla's shoulder to try and comfort her. "Look, I know I'm practically a stranger to you, but we're family now," whether Ashley likes it or not, "and I'm here if you need someone to talk to."

Kyla gives me a genuine smile and while she doesn't have a nose crinkle, I definitely see another thing her and Ashley have in common. "Your family is like something out of a '50s sitcom. You're all so nice."

That's true.

We Carlins are pretty damn awesome.

"How, uhm, how is Ashley handling everything?" Kyla asks hesitantly. "Is she still mad?"

I have no clue how to answer that question.

I would never want to betray my girl's confidence, but I want Kyla to realize that her reaction to everything wasn't really about Kyla per se. It was more about her dad and her mom and their dysfunctional relationship.

I'm not trying to disparage Ashley's dad but he did a pretty crappy job when it came to bringing his daughter up.

Or daughters as it may be.

And that fucked Ashley up a lot.

"I don't think mad is the right word," I eventually reply. "I think she's completely in shock about it, and it's probably going to take her some time to process everything."

Kyla reacts not like I expected her to. She lets out a chuckle. "No kidding. I went to bed one day a normal girl with aspirations to make it in the music business and I woke up the next day finding out that I'm part of rock royalty. It still hasn't sunk in completely that Raife Davies is my dad and Ashley Davies is my sister."

With all the tension that I've been feeling over the last 24 hours or so, I can't help but laugh a little too. "It could be worse, you could be related to Ashley's mom."

Oh snap!

And burn!

"Don't even get me started on that awful woman," Kyla says with a roll of her eyes. "If I would have known her intentions I never would have allowed her drag me into your place to like that. Especially considering we should have knocked."

I feel my face burning as I recall how Kyla first got introduced to me.

At least she looks equally embarrassed.

"If I ever see her again I'm going to give her a piece of my mind," I add, or you know, a punch to the face. "She's horrible."

"I can't imagine Ashley having to grow up with her as a mother," Kyla sighs sympathetically. "I might not have known my dad, but my mom was awesome."

Ouch.

I'm glad Ashley isn't here to hear that.

Not that I begrudge Kyla a decent mother. It's just I know how Ashley would react to that kind of statement and let's just say it wouldn't be pretty.

All of these old wounds she thought had healed have now been ripped open without any warning whatsoever. That has to hurt in a way I probably won't ever know.

Actually that did happen to me a couple of years ago and I can tell you from experience they don't just close back up because you want them to. Maybe in the long run Kyla's existence will be a good thing, but in the short term it's only going to bring Ashley heartache.

Sigh.

I wish I could make this all disappear for her.

I can't focus on that thought because it's not possible for me to snap my fingers and make everything better.

That would be so cool if I could do that though.

So cool!

"Have you had a chance to speak to her yet?" I ask Kyla as turn my attention back to our conversation.

She nods. "Yeah, she was worried about me, but your mom spoke to her and she feels much better."

Aw!

My mom really is the best, most...

"That's unacceptable!" I hear my mom scream from another room. "You promised me you'd be home for dinner, Arthur, and I'm sick and tired of never seeing you."

Whoa.

What the hell is that all about?

I haven't heard my mom yell like that in years.

And never at my father.

My stomach rumblies are back and I don't know what to do.

I glance over at Kyla and she looks as uncomfortable as I feel.

I can still hear her talking but now I can't make out what she's saying. I can however tell you that she's fuming.

I would not want to be my father right now.

"Do whatever you want, Arthur." My mom's voice gets loud again. "This discussion is over." The next thing I hear is a door being slammed and I'm still at a loss as to what is going on exactly.

My mom mentioned to me a couple of times that my dad is working too much but I had no clue it was such a big issue for them.

Thank god for Jessie and Melissa!

They seem to be the only ones around here that aren't experiencing any drama.

Oh no!

I hope I didn't jinx them too!

I take it back!

I try to resume my conversation with Kyla again but it's strained.

It's obvious we're both thinking of other things.

I do wait for my mom to make another appearance because I want to make sure she's ok. About half an hour later she comes down the stars and the look in her eyes tells me she's not in the mood to discuss what happened.

I definitely get my stubbornness from her.

If I didn't know any better I'd say she'd been crying.

Aw!

Poor her!

Maybe after she's had a chance to calm down I'll talk to her to see if I can be of help.

Perhaps a visit here tomorrow is order.

And that way Operation Get-to-know-my-future-sister-in-law will really get off the ground.

Once I'm convinced that things have settled back down as much as they're going to for the time being, I bid my mom and Kyla adieu.

My trip seems to have been a total bust.

Sigh again.

Can anything go right?

I start thinking of Ashley when my phone rings.

Guess who it is?

Yay!

I've missed her so much!

"Hey, Ash," I say enthusiastically. "Are you on your way home yet?"

"I"m home already," she replies in the sexiest voice ever. "But I seem to be missing a gorgeous girlfriend. Do you know where she might be?"

Double yay!

She sounds normal and not at all stressed out!

I bet going to the recording studio made her feel better.

"I'm actually in the car on my way to you," I tell her excitedly.

I haven't seen her in hours!

That's too long.

"And what kind of trouble have you been getting into?" she asks huskily.

Oh my!

Her tone sends good vibrations to my happy place.

I almost forget everything that's gone on over the last day and a bit.

Almost but not quite.

Ashley sounds carefree and not upset.

I really don't want to bring up the fact that I was visiting my mom and of course that I saw Kyla.

It's just going to make my girl angry or sad again.

I don't want to be the one that does that to her!

"I just want out for a drive," I lie.

I lie.

I lie.

I lie.

Oh my god!

Liar, liar my pants are one fire!

"No biggie," I finish and I'm finding it hard to swallow.

"Well stop talking to me so you can get your sexy self back home," Ashley coos before she hangs up.

What the hell have I just done?

I never lie to Ashley.

It's not like it's a big lie though.

And one little lie isn't anything to be concerned about.

Right?

Yeah, that's what I thought.

I'm in so much trouble.


	16. Chapter 16

Chapter 16

I am the worst person in the world.

The whole entire world.

Maybe in the whole entire galaxy!

Ok, ok, that's being a bit hysterical.

I need to calm down and assess the situation calmly.

Who am I kidding?

I'm the worst person in the whole freaking universe!

Ugh!

Ugh!

Ugh!

I cannot believe I lied to Ashley. And it wasn't just a little white lie I tell sometimes about checking another girl out.

What?

I'm only human after all!

It's not like any of them could compare to the hotness that is Ms. Ashley Davies.

But that's not the point.

The point is, I told a potentially damaging lie to the girl I've been the most honest with in my life. Sure in the beginning of our relationship both of us held back a few things from one other. Since then though, it's been nothing but complete and total honesty.

And I've ruined that streak because of my stupid mouth.

Why did I have to lie?

Because you didn't want to tell her the truth and risk setting Ashley off into anger or tears.

That's a good point, brain, but it doesn't excuse what I did.

Nothing excuses my behavior and no amount of rationalizing will change that.

It's just...

It's just…

Her voice sounded so carefree and I didn't want to make it get all tension filled again. I'd forgotten what it was like to be around moody, irrational and sulky Ashley. It's been so long since I've seen her.

And honestly, she's not someone I like all that much.

I've not had the best history with _that_ Ashley and I don't really want to be around her.

She's no fun at all.

I know, I know that sounds selfish of me, but I can't be perfect all the time.

Right?

Why has it gone so quiet all of a sudden?

Anyway...

Even though I feel like the world's biggest heel right now, I'm determined to tell Ashley everything as soon as I see her.

Well, I still haven't made a decision about the whole Glen cheating on Aiden situation, or my parents apparently having issues.

I didn't really lie about those two things though; I simply omitted telling her about them.

Ok, ok, that's a total cop out and I know it.

It seems like I can't get away with anything these days!

When I arrive home my resolve to be honest with my future wife starts to get shaky. I can't help that I'm nervous to tell Ashley I lied about where I was this afternoon.

Unlike her, it's not going to be pretty.

Maybe I'm just blowing this all out of proportion.

Maybe I'm letting my highly active mind psyche me out for nothing.

Maybe I'll say anything right now to calm myself down.

Ding.

Ding.

Ding.

We have a winner!

I slowly walk towards the house as a sense of foreboding overwhelms me.

No matter what happens all I need to do is remember to stay calm.

I'm so fucking nervous!

Oh well, the sooner I get this over with, the sooner I can make it up to Ashley for not telling her the truth.

With kisses.

Lots of kisses.

Sensual kisses.

Long kisses.

Wet kisses.

Wait.

What was I freaking out about again?

Who cares!

I'm too busy thinking about making out with Ashley that all my nerves have disappeared.

Go me!

I distracted myself in the best way possible!

I open the front door and Ashley is nowhere to be found.

Whew!

Things are going better than I ever could have imagined!

Now I have time to work on a strategy.

I need to figure out how I'm going to break my deception to a certain feisty brunette.

You would think that the straight approach would work best but I don't do straight well...

What?

I'm sorry, ok! I crack jokes when I'm feeling anxiety in case you hadn't noticed.

Instead of focusing on my shortcomings, I need to focus on how to best approach Ashley without causing a huge blowout.

I barely have time to form a coherent thought before I'm shoved quite forcefully against a nearby wall.

How rude!

And what the fuck?

I would normally be all freaked out but I know who my assailant is.

Again, I don't have a moment to react to what is happening because I feel lips pressed quite urgently against mine.

Holy moly!

I never excepted this kind of greeting when I returned home today.

What an awesome surprise!

"What took you so long?" Ashley husks right in my ear sending the best kind of shiver down my spine.

I love feeling her hot body against my own hot body.

The only way it could be better would be for her to be naked.

Oh god!

Naked Ashley!

I've missed you so, so, so, much!

"Uh...uh...uh..." I'm having a horrible time responding to Ashley's question because I feel my pants being tugged on and I think my girl is trying to get them off.

Oh god!

My head is spinning.

My heart is racing.

My happy place is tingling.

And my legs are on the brink of giving out on me.

Ashley's lips come crashing down on mine for a second time and any kind of coherent thought is flushed from my mind.

She's kissing me so passionately.

So urgently.

And yet I feel how much she loves me in her kisses. They're not desperate and they don't feel like the distracting kind of kisses.

They're so fucking hot!

I can barely keep up with the scorching pace Ashley is setting.

Not that I'm complaining!

At all!

I try pushing my body into hers but she has me pinned against the wall and it's so fucking sexy.

Oh god!

She's dominating me completely and I have no thought of challenging her authority.

Whatever she asks of me, I will do, willingly!

Ma'am, yes Ma'am!

Oh god!

I just pictured Ashley in military fatigues and I think I'm even more turned on than I was a few seconds ago.

Oh god!

Is that even possible?

Wait!

There's something I'm supposed to be doing right now.

Getting fucked senseless?

Ok!

No, no, no!

As awesome as that sounds, I think I'm supposed to be confessing something.

Are you serious?

How about you get some and then you can try that whole honesty angle?

What the hell, brain?

You're supposed to be my voice of reason. You're not supposed to encourage this kind of behavior.

Be ashamed, brain, very ashamed!

Whatever!

I'm about to have wild, aggressive and might I add awesome sex with Ashley and nothing else matters.

Feel free to join us if you like.

Wait.

What?

That doesn't even make any sense!

"Stop thinking so much," Ashley commands right before she tears my shirt open.

Hell yes!

And how inconsiderate!

This is a brand new shirt!

Brand new!

I don't have a chance to scold my beloved because her mouth latches on to my neck.

Oh god!

She's hitting my sweet spot and I'm fairly sure she's also giving me a hickey.

Oh god!

My loins are on fire!

Absolute and total fire!

And that's why what I'm about to do takes more will power than I ever thought I was possible of having. "Ash, wait," I whisper as I try to create some distance between us.

Oh god!

What am I thinking?

"No," she replies firmly. She's clearly not listening to me. Ashley seems damned determined to have me right here, right now.

Who am I to argue with that?

No!

I have to be strong!

Fuck!

She just undid the button of my jeans.

Oh god!

Now they've been unzipped.

Oh god!

And I feel her hand about to take me on a magic carpet ride.

Pun totally intended!

Oh god!

"Ashley!" I squeak out with the last shred of self control I have left. "Please stop."

Normally I beg in a whole different way when I'm with my beloved.

Instead of moving away from me, Ashley takes my hands and then pins them above my head.

Oh god!

She's so much sexier than I can possibly give her credit for.

"Now you listen to me," Ashley starts in a raspy as fuck voice. "I know what you're thinking and you're wrong."

Oh god!

I'm panting with anticipation to hear what she has to say.

I haven't seen Ashley this forceful in a while.

Me likey!

Me likey a lot!

"I'm not avoiding anything, Spence," she continues as the grip she has on my hands tightens. "I can't help it that all I've been thinking about since I've been gone is how much I want you."

Oh god!

"How much I always want you…"

Oh god!

"And how much I want to make you scream my name…"

Oh god!

How the hell am I supposed to remain firm when she talks to me like this?

It's not possible!

"Whatever is going on doesn't change how I feel about you," Ashley is still talking and I'm still listening with rapt attention. "It doesn't change the fact that I want to ravage your right now until you can't take it anymore."

Oh holy hell!

I think my eyes have fully bugged out of their sockets.

Ashley keeps my hands pinned over my head while one of her hands makes its way down my front. "Now, where was I?"

I know!

Pick me!

Pick me!

Any response I have to Ashley's rhetorical question is censored when her tongue finds its way back into my mouth.

Oh god!

My whole entire body is one fire with one particular place burning the most.

Any guesses as to what part that is?

Suddenly my jeans are down at my ankles.

Along with my underwear.

My underwear!

And a familiar set of fingers is dancing their way across stomach.

Oh god!

I have to put a stop to this before I can't.

Fuck!

This sucks!

"Ashley!" I say more forcefully as I push my girl away from me.

I'm a moron!

An idiot!

A dumbass!

"What is wrong with you?" Ashley asks looking mighty pissed off.

I have no idea!

It's really hard to have a mature conversation considering I'm standing here practically naked.

"Nothing, nothing is wrong," I reply while I try to catch my breath. I see Ashley advancing towards me again so I hold out my arm to let her know not to take another step in my direction. "Please, just listen and don't get mad."

Ashley folds her arms across her chest. "Fine, I'm listening."

Why does she have to look so sexy?

Why does she have to have the best eyes ever?

Why does she have to have the most kissable lips on this planet?

Why am I complaining about all these things?

I pull my pants up much to my chagrin and Ashley's too.

I know this because she lets out a little snort when I do them back up.

Don't worry, Ash, I'm mad at myself too!

I adjust my shirt a little and then I take a deep breath.

It's still ruined but I've made myself as presentable as possible in this situation.

Here goes nothing!

Eek!

"First of all, you know how much I want you too." I have to make this point clear because I don't want Ashley thinking I'm rejecting her. "But this isn't about that."

I see her relax a little and that gives me some confidence.

I start fidgeting with my hands because I'm getting nervous again. "I lied to you when you asked where I was this afternoon."

Oh god!

Her shoulders have tensed back up!

All because of me and my lying ways!

I can't let my own feelings get me sidetracked here.

I have a feeling that this conversation is going to be an important one for us in the long run.

"It's nothing like that," I say to alleviate what I think might be Ashley's first worry. I see her relax a second time so I go on. "I was actually at my mom's and I had a chance to spend some time with Kyla and got to know her a bit better."

I feel like squeezing my eyes shut as I brace from the tongue lashing Ashley's about to give me.

And it's not going to be the good kind!

That I'm sure of.

"Why did you lie?" Ashley asks calmly.

Hmmmm.

I wasn't expecting her to react so well.

I hope that's not a bad sign.

"Because I didn't want to make you upset," I tell her honestly. "And I didn't want you to be mad at me."

I hold my breath again because I'm sure I'm about to face the wrath of my girl.

And I totally deserve it!

"Spence," Ashley starts before she moves in close to me, "I'm not mad, a little surprised, but not mad."

Huh?

Have I entered the Twilight Zone?

"After the way I freaked out yesterday, it makes sense that you would be a little apprehensive to tell me about this afternoon." Ashley is almost whispering, "But I don't want you to be scared of me or of being honest with me. Ok?"

"Ok," I whisper back with a nod of my head. "So you're really not mad?"

I have to be sure.

"Well, I'm a little bit ticked off that you killed the mood," Ashley replies sweetly. She gives me a soft kiss that melts my heart a little. "But I love you too much to let that be something I'm mad at."

I can't help but smile even if that's not what I was really asking her about. "I meant about Kyla, about spending time with her."

Ashley sighs but she doesn't move away, "Look, I haven't changed my opinion about her or this whole fucked up mess."

Too bad!

That would save us all a lot of time and drama.

"But…"

Oh!

Yay!

There is a but in there!

"Maybe after some time has passed there is a chance I could change my mind," Ashley admits much to my surprise.

"Really?" I inquire because this all seems too good to be true.

She's not mad that I lied.

She's not mad that I was with Kyla.

And she's not ruling out a future relationship with her half-sister.

Alleged half sister.

Don't want to get sued, just in case.

Ashley gives me a sweet smile. "I know I was crazy yesterday but that was yesterday and I've had more time to think about everything."

Aw!

I totally underestimated her!

And I know exactly how I'm going to apologize!

Her face turns serious. "But don't push me, Spence. Ok?" I nod in agreement because how could I say no to her. "Let me deal with this at my own pace and we'll see."

"You have yourself a deal," I reply sincerely.

I guess I can be a tad pushy at times, but in my defense I just want what is best for the woman that I love.

Is that so wrong?

That's what I thought!

I guess I didn't give Ashley enough credit.

Clearly I had a right to be concerned, but in the end I should have had faith that she'd come through. She is after all the most wonderful person I've ever met.

What?

It's true!

"I love you so much," I tell her sweetly. "So much."

Ashley kisses me softly. "Not as much as I love you."

Before I even have a chance to protest she leaves me and heads to the kitchen.

Something about getting dinner ready.

Hey!

There's a meal right here waiting for her!

Come back!

Please!

How am I supposed to move when my lower regions are still buzzing with desire?

Now that everything has been sorted out why are we not having sex?

Hello!

Why am I talking to myself instead of getting screwed?

Literally!

Ugh!

Ugh!

Ugh!

Now I need an extremely cold shower and to change my underwear!

What?

Too much information?

Well, excuse fucking me!

I'm a bit frustrated in case you can't tell.

Whatever the female equivalent of having blue balls is, I have it.

And then some!

I can only hope that later tonight Ashley will take care of that, just like I have every intention of taking care of her.

Oh!

Yeah!

* * *

Unfortunately for me, all my plans for last night fell through.

Boo!

Hiss!

I'm super sad!

I can't blame Ashley, it wasn't her fault. It would seem that all the drama from the last 48 hours caught up to me and before I had a chance to make a move on my future wife, I fell asleep in her arms on our couch.

It could have been worse, but still!

I had to take another cold shower when I woke up this morning.

Ashley left early for the studio and while I could take matters into my own hands, I think having her relieve my sexual tension is a much better idea.

Unless of course nothing happens tonight, then me and my old friend Mr. Showerhead will need to get reacquainted.

What?

A woman has got to do what a woman has got to do.

To make sure that I stay faithful to Ashley I've been sending her highly suggestive text messages since I've woken up.

Tee hee!

I'm so bad!

But I know she loves it!

And I can say that with certainty because of the messages I've gotten back from her.

Thankfully I'm having lunch with Jessie today so I'll have something to do with my time instead of fantasizing about all the new sexual positions Ashley and I are going to try tonight.

Wait!

Maybe I should cancel on her.

Kidding!

Sort of.

For the first time since Kyla showed up I'm feeling confident that things will work themselves out. It might take longer than I would hope for that to happen, but eventually I'm sure we'll all be one happy family.

Aw!

That sounds sweet.

I walk into my former place of work feeling lighter than I've been in the last two days.

Plus, having lunch with Jessie will allow me a chance to talk to my dad about what is going on with him and my mother.

See, everything is coming up Spencer!

I think I'm going to say hello to Mrs. Nyland while I'm here as well. I know she must miss working for me so much.

"There you are," I hear Jessie say in what sounds like a panicked voice.

I'm sure I'm just imagining things, like I always do.

"Here I am," I confirm and then I laugh at how witty I am.

"Come with me," Jessie drags me into her office without asking me if I wanted to join her.

What's up with that?

"I've been trying to reach you for the last half hour," she says once the door is shut.

Oops!

I think I might have killed my phone battery with all sexy texts I've been sending Ashley.

"I just got sent an article that's going to be published in a couple of hours and I think you have a right to see it," Jessie finishes and the expression on her face is extremely somber.

Uh oh!

I glance over at Jessie's computer screen and once I get a chance to read the headline of the article she's referring to, my stomach plummets to the ground.

**Exclusive: Ashley Davies' Long Lost Sister and What She Has To Say About Her Rock Star Dad and Her Rock Star Sister.**

Fuck me!

This cannot be happening.

Fuck me!

After Ashley finds out about this I have a feeling that's the only way I'm going to get some.

Great, just great!


	17. Chapter 17

**A/N Thanks for you feedback, I do appreciate it :)**

Chapter 17

The shit is about to hit the fan!

I have this tendency to exaggerate and see drama where there really isn't any.

Now is not one of those times.

My head is still spinning after catching a glimpse at that exclusive headlines as well as the first few paragraphs of the actual article. Jessie was only sent a snippet of what was going to be released, not the whole thing.

If what I read is any indication, things are about to blow up big time.

And of course by things I'm referring to my sexy girlfriend because she is going to freak the fuck out. Not that I blame her or anything, but that doesn't make the impending disaster any less scary.

Ashley's been pretty lucky when it comes to her media coverage. Aside from the occasional story of her cheating on me, she hasn't really had to face any bad press.

I like to think that has a little to do with me and my ability to handle the mainstream media as well as the paparazzi. I give them what they are looking for and they leave Ashley and me alone for the most part.

But I don't think I can put a stop to the firestorm that's about to happen.

Jessie has put out calls to her sources and so have I to find out if that interview with Kyla is legit. If it is then I have severely misjudged the young woman who's staying with my parents. Needless to say she won't be staying there much longer if everything checks out.

What a bitch!

After we gave her a place to stay!

Hold up.

I promised myself that I wouldn't judge Kyla without knowing the truth but my fears and anxiety are preventing me from remaining calm.

It doesn't help matters that I can't locate Ashley and if she catches wind of this story before I can get to her then I can only imagine her reaction.

I shudder at that thought.

From what I read, the story paints an awful picture of Ashley, her father and what the article is implying a plot to keep Kyla from her family and her fortune. I can't stand the idea of anyone thinking horrible things about her.

I know I can't control what people think, but as the person in charge of the business side of Ashley's career I care about her image. Of course I care about it because I love her so much, but I have to try and remain professional now without letting my feelings getting in the way.

That's only my secondary concern though, my more important worry is what this kind of story is going to do Ashley's psyche. She's already taken giant steps backwards when it comes to her past. If she goes back any further, I'm really worried about what it would do to her.

Ashley really felt like she'd moved past her childhood, and now it's clear there are still lingering issues for her to come to terms with. It sucks sure, but she can't run from them, she has to deal with them head on.

And I'll do anything in my power to help her without pushing.

I hope.

"What are you doing here?" my dad asks when he walks into Jessie's office.

She's in with Madison right now as the two of them work on figuring out what's going on.

"Hey dad," I say as I continue to send out messages on my BlackBerry.

It hadn't died after all; I just turned my phone off by accident.

Oops.

I don't want to worry him about what's going on, so I think I'll keep him out of the loop on this one. Besides, the less people that know about this right now, the better. "I was just stopping by to say hi to Jessie."

"I take it you know about the unflattering story that's about to break regarding Ashley," he states calmly.

Damn it.

I'm not as good a liar as I thought.

"Yeah, I know," I reply right before I make eye contact with him.

Oh my!

My dad looks stressed beyond belief!

I wonder if that's because of Ashley, because he's fighting with my mom, a combination of the two or something else entirely.

He takes a seat across from me; I'm behind Jessie's desk. "Do you need any help dealing with this? You know just because you don't work here anymore, doesn't mean you can't come to us for help."

Aw!

He's such a sweet father!

"Madison and Jessie are already working the phones," I admit a bit sheepishly. Maybe I should have asked him if they could help before I took advantage of their generosity. "I'm sorry that..."

My dad waves his hand to cut me off. "Don't apologize, Spence. This place is always going to have both your backs."

"Thanks," I say sincerely. That means a lot to me and it means a lot to Ashley as well. "Are you doing ok?"

"I'm fine," my dad tells me but I'm not convinced. I want to ask him about what's going on with him and my mom but I don't know if that's any of my business. "Really I am, so please just focus on getting control of this situation."

"Are you sure?" I ask again because I'm pretty sure it's now him lying to me. "I can handle more than one crisis at a time."

"I know you can," my dad chuckles, but I can't help but notice it seems almost forced. "You take after me."

"That I do," I smile but I'm still anxious about everything. "Please let me know if there's anything I can help with."

He seems to hesitate but he doesn't press the issue any further. "I will, for sure." He stands up and I walk over to give him a hug. "Take care of Ashley and let her know she has all of my support."

"I will, dad," I assure him and then I watch him leave.

I don't really have time to think any more about the conversation because a minute later Jessie rushes into her office. The expression on her face lets me know that she's about to deliver really bad news.

I brace myself but that doesn't help when she reveals that the interview with Kyla is in fact real.

Bloody hell!

The worst really is happening.

It would appear I have a really short window to deal with this before everything goes public. I want to talk to Ashley but she's still nowhere to be found.

I've contacted everyone she was with today but nobody seems to know where she is and she's not answering her phone.

I swear one of these days I'm going to implant a homing device in that girl.

I guess the next best option is to head over to my parent's house so I can wring a certain girl's neck.

Not literally!

Maybe.

If Kyla has any brains in her tiny head she'll have already left town.

Because she's about to meet Angry, Protective Spencer.

I'd pity her but she doesn't deserve any.

Prepare for a world of pain, Kyla Woods!

Oh!

Yeah!

* * *

I spent the entire car ride over to my parent's house trying to figure out the best way to handle my confrontation with Ms. Woods.

Should I go in guns blazing and tear her a new one?

Should I give her a chance to explain why she would do such an awful thing?

Should my mom and I throw her out together?

There are so many options to choose from and I still haven't decided what I want to do.

All I know is that the artist formerly known as Ashley's long-lost sister pulled a fast one on all of us. I should have been more suspicious of her and that convoluted story she fed everyone but there was something about Kyla that struck me as trustworthy.

Man, I am so ticked off!

Hopefully the storm that comes from our interactions with that little con artist will pass quickly and then Ashley and I can return to our normal lives.

Are those wedding bells I hear?

I hope so!

Besides the upcoming wedding, I can work on solving all the other little issues in my life.

Uh oh.

Oh fuck!

No!

No!

No!

I just pulled into the driveway of my parent's house and what do I see?

Ashley's car.

This can't be good!

Maybe she decided to bond with Kyla and she knows nothing about the story?

That could be it.

Right?

No, she would have told me if she was planning to get to know her sister better.

That can only mean one thing!

What the hell?

I can't catch even one break these days!

Speaking of brakes, I almost forget to use mine, and I come close to smashing into Ashley's car because I'm so distracted and upset.

Thankfully I notice before it's too late.

Whew!

I really can't handle much more going wrong.

I jump out of the Spencermobile, after putting it park, and head inside to deal with whatever craziness is going on.

Please let it not be as bad as I think it's going to get!

Please!

Please!

Please!

I barely have the door open and I can already here Ashley's voice bellowing through the house.

"Get the hell out of here!" she yells in a voice so angry I barely recognize it. "Now!"

Yowzers.

This is going to be worse than I imagined.

"Ashley, I think you need to relax and tell us what's going on," my mom says in a calm tone, no doubt to try and diffuse the situation.

Good luck with that!

Ashley laughs, but it sounds incredibly fake. "Why don't you ask that bitch what's going on."

"Ashley!" my mom exclaims.

Why haven't I arrived on the scene yet?

And why is everything moving in slow motion?

"I'm sorry, Mrs. C, but I know something you don't," Ashley apologizes and I'm not surprised. She has a lot of respect for my parents.

I turn the corner before anyone else says anything. My mom is sort of standing in front of Kyla like she's protecting her and Ashley looks like she's about to fly off the handle.

Rightfully so.

She's had someone infiltrate her life that clearly wants to do nothing more than cause trouble and cash in on the Davies name.

I slide across the kitchen floor to step in between the fight that's about to take place.

I have no intention of letting Kyla off the hook, but I'd rather not see Ashley say something to my mom that she'll regret later. I know when I'm upset my mouth sometimes gets the best of me.

Actually that happens when I'm in a good mood too.

Anyway...

Apparently someone waxed the floor and didn't think it was important to tell me. I really wish they would have.

I wish that because I'm currently careening out of control across the hallway.

I really need to find a way to stop.

Oh, I just did!

Do you want to know how I managed that?

I'll tell you.

I went flying into the wall closest to Ashley head first.

Ow!

Luckily I am an expert at this kind of thing so I'm not hurt too badly.

And I was able to use my hands to avoid concussing myself.

Maybe my comedic timing will be enough to break the palpable tension I'm feeling from Ashley, my mom and Kyla.

"I'm ok," I declare so nobody worries too much about my noggin.

It's taken plenty of knocks before without any major damage.

What?

I figure it makes sense to use this momentary lull in the yelling to step in and take control.

Welcome back, Take Charge Spencer!

"I know you're upset," I say after I turn towards Ashley.

That's putting it mildly.

You should see how mad she looks!

Even though she's a tad on the crazed side right now, she's still sexy as fuck.

"And you have every right to be," I continue but I don't think I'm having any affect on her. "But I think it's best if we..."

"Save it, Spence," Ashley cuts in.

Sigh.

I knew this was going to get ugly.

"I told you she couldn't be trusted." She is clenching her hands into fists. I don't remember saying she could be exactly, but I don't think that matters much now. "I bet you she made up this whole thing just to try and get her fifteen minutes of fame and some money."

"Would someone please tell me what's going on?" my mom pleads.

I don't get a chance to explain anything because Ashley starts talking first. "It seems your house guest is a big fat liar. Isn't that right?"

I'm not quite sure who she's asking that question to.

I glance over at Kyla and the expression on her face is one of fear mixed with something else I can't read.

Probably guilt for taking advantage of the kindness that been shown to her.

Serves her right!

"Ashley, you're not making any sense," my mom says but she's not trying to be mean. She's just trying to get answers.

"Let me explain then," Ashley replies before pulling a few sheets of paper out of the pocket of her jeans.

I can only watch on in muted horror.

"I guess she forgot to mention a little interview she gave where she trashed my entire family." Ashley is on a roll now and I'm fairly certain that there's no way to stop her. "How about I quote a few of the best tidbits so you can understand what a conniving backstabber she is."

While I'm curious to know what Kyla said in her interview, I'm more curious to find out how Ashley caught wind of the story before I did.

Maybe she was contacted when I accidentally had my phone off.

This is all my fault!

"I'm looking for my big break, that's why I moved out here. And if I can use my family connections to make that happen, then that's what I'll do," Ashley spits out with a hell of a lot of venom.

Ok, that sounds bad but I was expecting something much worse.

Kyla tries to interrupt but Ashley won't let her.

"I'm sure my existence will come as a complete surprise to Ashley, but it shouldn't considering how much Raife Davies played around." Ashley's getting red in the face and her hand is shaking a bit. "If there's one thing he was famous for more than his music it's how much of a womanizer he was."

Ouch.

"That's not even the worst part," Ashley states coldly. "My mom told me he would complain to her about the family he left in California and how burdened he felt having to take care of everybody."

Double ouch.

Could this get any worse?

You know, I probably shouldn't have asked that question.

"He would go on and on about how much of a brat he felt Ashley was turning into while he was on the road." I get the feeling my girl is on the verge of a breakdown. "And how much he couldn't stand going back home because of how out of control she was getting."

I grab the papers out of Ashley's hand because I can't take anymore of this.

I can only imagine how much reading those horrible words have cut into her.

Regardless of anything she's heard about her dad or what he thought of her, she's not going to believe that anymore.

All she's going to hear are these words even if they're not true.

"I think you should leave," I say to Kyla before she can inflict anymore damage.

If I would have known what a disaster her existence would turn out to be I never would have stood up for her.

Ashley was right and if I thought it would make any difference, I'd tell her that.

I can feel the pain radiating from Ashley. She's standing behind me and as much as I want to comfort her, it's more important for Kyla to get as far away from us as possible.

My mom crosses her arms across her chest as she shoots Kyla the scariest of looks. "Did you really tell a reporter all of those horrible things?"

"Of course she did!" Ashley snaps and I can't blame her for freaking out.

I am too, but she needs me to be a rock for her and that's exactly what I'll be so she can get through this.

I don't even want to know what else was said about Ashley and her dad.

"I've never been interviewed by anybody," Kyla replies and her voice cracks. She seems to be close to tears.

Is it bad that I want to see her suffer?

Yeah, that's what I thought.

She sniffs a few times. "I have no idea what you're talking about."

"Do you really think anyone here is going to believe you?" Ashley asks rhetorically. "You're doe-eyed innocent act isn't going to work anymore."

Kyla starts crying and she wraps her arms around her body. "I'm not lying."

If this girl is lying, let me tell you she needs to give up her singing career and start auditioning for movies.

I know what Jessie's source said.

And I know what Ashley thinks.

But for some reason I'm starting to doubt that Kyla is in fact the evil mastermind I thought she was only minutes ago.

Looking at how distraught she appears to be and how authentic her tears seem, makes me question if she is in fact telling the truth.

I wish I knew how to express that to Ashley without getting my head chewed off.

"Who did you tell about Ashley being your sister?" my mom asks Kyla. "Maybe they said something to the press."

"I can't believe you're taking her side," Ashley snaps. "She's obviously been playing us all from the beginning."

"I'm not taking anyone's side," my mom clarifies. "But yelling and screaming isn't the most productive thing to do right now."

"The only person who knows is my mother and she wouldn't say anything." Kyla is still crying a little but at least she's able to explain herself. "She's never told anyone that Raife was my father."

"Are you sure?" my mom inquires before Ashley can interject with her thoughts on the matter. "Because clearly someone knew enough to tip the press off of your existence."

I inwardly gasp as a light bulb goes off in my head.

"I'm sure," Kyla replies with a lot of conviction and I believe her now.

I don't even know if I want to be right about this because either way Ashley is going to be hurt.

"Hold on a second," she says as her eyes go wide.

I'm pretty sure she just realized what I did when that light bulb went off.

"I knew it!" Ashley spits out, but she's wrong about who's to blame here.

"What happened?" I ask even though I think I already know.

Kyla seems hesitant to answer me but eventually she starts talking. "When I arrived at Christine's place looking for Ashley she didn't want to let me in at first but then when she heard why I was there she was eager to hear my story."

I knew it!

"I told her what I knew and then she disappeared for a while." Kyla takes a deep breath before going on. "When she returned she had someone with her that she said was her personal assistant. He started asking me a bunch of questions too but I never said anything that horrible. I swear!"

So either her words were taken out of context or the entire interview is fabricated.

I have a feeling it's a bit of both.

I'm guessing Kyla's conversation was taped and Jessie's source heard a snippet of the conversation but it was enough to validate the entire article.

"My mom is responsible for this?" Ashley asks and she's squeezing my hand so hard I'm afraid she might break a finger of mine.

Kyla stammers out a response but it's evident that she's trying not to hurt Ashley by confirming what I already suspected.

"I'm going to kill her," Ashley threatens before she takes off.

Oh god!

I think she's angry enough to mean that.

Even though B.M. deserves what's coming her way, Ashley will be the one that gets in trouble.

That's why I chase after her.

And that's why I will do anything to prevent my girl from making a huge mistake.

Good luck to me!


	18. Chapter 18

**A/N So, we've reached the end of what I've already written. I'm sad too! Thanks to anyone who has left me feedback, I say it a lot but I really do appreciate it. Hopefully my next update won't take too long to get written.**

Chapter 18

I'm barely out the door when I run smack into Ashley.

Ow!

I was expecting some big scene where I'd have to chase after her as she drove away, or at the very least jump in front of car and threaten not to move until she hears me out.

I wasn't expecting her to be waiting for me, like she appears to have been doing.

My poor body has been through a lot of knocks today.

I think a massage when all this annoying drama is over is in order!

What a great plan, if I do say so myself.

Luckily I didn't knock either of us over, but that still doesn't explain why Ashley was standing outside my parents' door.

It's all very odd.

After Ashley and I make sure we're both ok, she gets in the Spencermobile without saying anything.

Like I said, very odd.

I'm not really sure what she's doing, or what that pretty little head of hers is thinking. "Uhm, Ash..."

"You're coming with me, I assume," Ashley states without looking at me.

I would make a joke about making assumptions, but I really don't think this is the appropriate moment. Even though Ashley isn't making eye contact, I can tell by the tone in her voice that she's upset and in pain.

It's one thing if Kyla really was the person behind that nasty article. She's been in Ashley's life for about five seconds and they don't know each other at all. Not to mention she really doesn't owe Ashley anything when they have no relationship.

It's another thing all together to be betrayed by your own mother. By a person who's supposed to love you unconditionally and always be there for you.

Sure, Ashley has had virtually no contact with B.M. since I've known her, but that doesn't make the sting of having her be the one to say such awful things any less harsh. I am almost positive Christine made up all those things that Ashley's dad supposedly said. Why she would do that is beyond me, but its lasting affect will linger.

For how long, I'm not sure. I'll do my best to erase all of those awful words from Ashley's mind even if I have no idea how to do that.

"Of course I am," I reply before joining Ashley in my car. I glance over at her, but her eyes remain forward. "I'm so sorry about all of this." It sounds lame coming out of my mouth, I hope it doesn't sound lame to Ashley.

"I know you are." Ashley finally looks at me and despite how awful she must be feeling, she cracks a small smile. "And if you could do something to make everything go back to normal, I'd really appreciate it."

I smile back at her. "I'll see what I can do."

I'd actually do just about anything to take away the last few days, I really would. But I have a feeling if we can get through this turmoil, if I can be a support to Ashley and she can lean on me as much as she needs, that we'll come out stronger in the end.

What doesn't kill us, makes us stronger.

Right?

That's the way the saying goes, so it must be true.

I hope that's the case or else I'm going to be mad!

Our car ride starts and instead of conversation, Ashley quietly takes my hand. She holds on tight and that tells me everything I need to know.

She needs me right now.

Plain and simple

And she's probably never needed me more.

Nothing, and I mean nothing, is going to stop me from being the rock that my girl needs me to be.

* * *

We pull up to B.M.'s house and I'm extremely nervous.

Not for me.

I'm nervous for Ashley because I can only assume that this conversation, or screaming match as it may be, is not going to end well. I don't think it takes a genius to figure that out.

My only hope is that things are over before too much damage is inflicted on Ashley. She's already gone through a lot regarding her parents in general, not to mention what's happened the last few days, I don't think it's too much to ask that she get through this relatively unscathed.

Regardless of what happens, I'll give any kind of support Ashley asks of me.

Any kind.

Even if that support means punching B.M. a couple of times.

What?

I used to take _Tae-Bo_!

I can totally handle myself.

Whatever she needs from me, I'll give her.

"I know you want this to be your fight," Ashley starts as we get out of the Spencermobile. "But it isn't, so please let me handle whatever happens."

Boo!

Hiss!

That's going to be impossible to do!

I can't keep my mouth shut at the best of times and now my girl expects me not to rip her mother a new one!

Dang!

But I did say I'd give her whatever she needs and that's what I will do.

Regardless of how much it's going to suck.

"Whatever you want, Ash," I reply before I take her hand in mine. "Whatever you want."

I repeat the message so she understands exactly how much I'm going to respect her wishes.

As of this moment the only comments I will make about her confrontation with B.M. will be in my head.

Oh boy.

It's going to get awful loud in here.

I can tell that Ashley is extremely nervous for what's about to take place, but I can also tell that she's determined to give B.M. a piece of her sexy mind.

I'm not exactly clear how she knows where her mother lives.

It's not like B.M. ever invited us over for tea or anything.

But that's a question for another day.

Ashley looks over at me once we reach the front door of her mother's house. She smiles, but I know that it's only for show. "Here we go."

I squeeze my girl's hand as a sign of how much I'm here to support her.

And when I hear the door opening, my stomach clenches.

I suck in a breath in anticipation of seeing B.M. but some weird looking old dude is the one who opens the door.

Ew!

I think this is B.M.'s husband, her fourth husband might I add, and I can say that she definitely didn't marry him for his looks.

I'm sure we can all figure out why she did.

"Can I help you?" he asks us in a tone that sounds very dismissive.

I squeeze Ashley's hand again in hopes of keep her somewhat calm.

"I'm here to see my..." Ashley pauses a beat, "Christine."

Ouch.

And I'm not at all surprised that she's chosen to address her mother with her first name.

She lost the title of "mom" a long time ago.

"And who are you exactly?" he asks in an even ruder tone.

Wow, I can only imagine how cheery a household this must be to live in.

Do I really need to point out how much it sucks that he doesn't even know his own step daughter?

Yeah, I didn't think so.

It is taking all of Ashley's self control not to lose it completely.

She's doing such a good job!

"I'm her..." Once again Ashley stops herself from giving him an automatic answer. "You can tell her that Ashley is here to see her."

B.M.'s fugly husband doesn't say anything else. What he does instead is give us a very dirty look before disappearing inside the house.

At least he didn't slam the door in our face?

Right?

I think that would have sent my brunette hottie right over the edge.

Thank goodness for small miracles.

About thirty seconds pass and then I hear loudest heels come clicking into the entrance way.

Forget the self control Ashley is showing. Do you have any concept how difficult it is for _me_ not to to slap some sense into B.M.'s overly botoxed face?

But as I've mentioned a thousand times already over the last couple of days, this isn't about me so I'm not going to do anything rash.

No matter how much I want to.

"Ashley," B.M. says with about as much warmth in her voice as...I can't think of a good analogy here so I'm just going to leave it to your imagination. "To what do I owe the pleasure?"

"Why?" Ashley asks without really explaining herself.

"I don't have time for your games," B.M. replies like the ice queen that she is. "I have an important meeting to go to."

Yeah.

Right.

I'm sure her "meeting" is nothing more than a trip to the nearest plastic surgeon.

She's more plastic than a Barbie doll.

B.M. goes to close the door in our faces but Ashley's hand blocks her from shutting us out.

Literally.

"Why did you sell me out?" Ashley clarifies as her eyes turn to fire. "Why did you sell that story to the tabloids? And why the fuck did you tell those lies about dad?"

B.M. lets out a laugh so sinister it would make a movie villain proud. "Everything I said about your father is true. All this time you've blamed me for him leaving, but I was just protecting you from the truth. You're the reason he never came home and you're the real reason he left us."

What!

The!

Fuck!

Tell me that whore bag did not just say that?

Tell me, because if she did, I cannot be held responsible for my actions.

There is no way any word out of that lying skank's mouth is true.

There just isn't!

Regardless of the fact that B.M. is a disgusting shrew, Ashley has heard countless stories from people who knew her dad well about how much he loved her.

How much he regretted a lot of the choices he made.

And how much he wished he could have been a better dad.

I'm in too much shock to do anything and I'm not really sure it's my place to step in and beat B.M. down.

Oh, but I want to.

I want to so fucking much!

"You're lying," Ashley responds much to my surprise. I wasn't sure she had the wherewithal to realize the mind games B.M. is apparently playing. "We both know why he hated coming home so much."

Whether Ashley is the one lying now is not important.

Whether she believes what she is saying is not important.

Because I know what she's doing.

She's not going to let B.M. have the satisfaction of seeing her breakdown.

And I think I love her even more for the strength she's showing.

I can only assume her strong facade will go away when we're alone, but that doesn't matter.

What matters is she's showing B.M. that she won't be manipulated.

I have no clue why B.M. is acting this way and frankly I don't give a rat's ass.

Nothing can justify her behavior right now and nothing ever will.

"Did you ever love me?" Ashley inquiries much to my horror. "Was there ever a part of you that loved me?"

I can understand why she's asking this question.

Her mother has showed her nothing but the opposite of love for most of her life.

I get that.

But I have a sinking feeling my girl is not going too like what comes next.

"You always were a drama queen," B.M. says as her eyes narrow at the two of us. "You can't really love something that you never wanted to begin with, _Ashley_."

Oh!

My!

God!

I can practically hear Ashley's heart shatter into a million little pieces.

It's one thing to think that your mother doesn't love you.

It's another thing all together to have that worse nightmare confirmed.

I had a strong suspicion that Ashley coming over here today was a huge mistake.

If I thought for even a split second that B.M. would act this horribly I would have insisted that Ashley change her mind.

And now I cannot be stopped.

Because now I'm beyond upset.

I'm beyond mad.

I'm beyond self control.

I'm beyond all of those things.

I cannot allow this to go on for one single second.

Ashley has already suffered getting wounded in such a horrible way and she's not going to suffer any longer.

"What the fuck is your defect?" I shriek uncontrollably. I'm still holding Ashley's hand but I take a step in front of her, to shield my girl from any more attacks. "Seriously, what is wrong with you?"

"Don't you dare speak to me like that!" B.M. looks offended that I'm even addressing her. "This is none of our business."

I almost laugh at the gall B.M. has, but I'm too tempted to wipe that damn smirk of her face.

Violence rarely solves anything.

Even if the situation warrants it, like it does now.

"I will speak to you any god damn way I want!" I exclaim forcefully.

I can feel the adrenalin in my body start pumping.

I am so fired up!

"I used to get angry every time Ashley would tell me stories about what growing up with a mother like you was like," I continue as a calmness comes over me.

Losing control is tempting but there is something I've wanted to say to B.M. for some time now and this might be my last and only chance to do so.

I can tell that she wants to tell me where to go or slam the door in my face.

But if she knows what's good for her, she won't.

Because then I will get pissed and she doesn't want to meet Out-of-Control Spencer.

Trust me.

I hope Ashley understands why I can't keep quiet.

I hope she understands that I'm doing this to protect her from any more hurtful words.

I hope she understands that I'm stepping in not to go against her wishes, but because it's the right thing to do.

And obviously because I love her more than I love anybody else in the world.

"But I'm not angry anymore." A little white lie but one that won't hurt anybody. "Mostly, I feel sorry for you."

"Excuse me!" B.M. interrupts, confirming how stupid she is. "You have no right..."

"Did I say you could cut me off?" Ha! Suck on that, B.M.! "You're going to listen to me and then we'll go."

Hopefully forever.

If I never see B.M.'s face again it will be too soon.

"As I was saying, mostly I feel sorry for you." I keep going because I won't back down. "I feel sorry for you because you have the most loving, caring, wonderful, smart, beautiful, talented daughter and you don't even know it."

And believe me I'm understating here.

I could go on and on forever about how utterly wonderful Ashley is.

"I have no clue how someone as vapid as you could give birth to someone as amazing as Ashley." I can feel myself getting choked up. "You are missing out on knowing her because of your own issues and because you're clearly a woman so full of hate and a woman who is miserable."

I see B.M.'s eyes flicker just a little bit and that confirms that I'm getting to her.

Good!

She deserves it!

"Ashley has countless people who realize what a fantastic person she is," I tell B.M. with authority. "And they know how lucky they are to have her as a part of their lives."

That is so true!

And nobody knows that better than me.

"I wouldn't change one single thing about her because I'm proud to say I'm in love with the perfect person for me." I don't know how much longer I can keep talking without starting to cry. "And all you do is try to tear her down."

But I won't let her.

Not anymore.

And never again.

That's it for B.M.

"You're a sad excuse for a mother and for a human being," I spit out. I don't even care if I'm out of line because I really don't think I am. "If you ever talk to Ashley like that again, you'll be sorry."

Will she ever!

"We're out of here," I announce without checking with Ashley.

I really don't think I have to.

I go to leave, but Ashley doesn't move.

Uh oh.

Maybe I overstepped my bounds.

But when she speaks I realize she's just expanding on the threat I issued to B.M.

"If you ever come near Spencer or me, if you ever even think of contacting me, if you ever feel the need to make up for the shitty job you did raising me, don't bother." Ashley clenches my hand so incredibly hard and I let her. "Because as of right now, I no longer have a mother."

I'd say ouch if I thought Christine deserved it.

But she doesn't.

I think Ashley cutting her out of her life and our lives is exactly the right move.

It's still going to hurt.

For a while.

But clearly she's way better of without having to worry about what this woman is going to do or say.

No more words are spoken.

There are no more dramatic scenes to be had.

The two of us simply turn around and walk away from what is hopefully a chapter that's on the way to being closed for Ashley.

Maybe it will never be closed all the way.

But by kicking Christine out of her life completely, eventually it will be closed enough for her to be the non-factor that she should be.

I drive away feeling like a weight has been lifted from both our shoulders.

It isn't until we get home that Ashley breaks down in my arms.

And I let her.

For most of the night and into the next day.

She needs to get everything out in order to move on.

The article is released but I don't let her deal with any of the fall out from that.

That's my job

And so is finding some way to help her through the pain she is feeling.

I hope I can think of an idea soon!

* * *

Five days.

Five very long days.

That's how long it's been since our infamous visit to the woman formerly know as Ashley's mother.

I've been understanding.

I've listened to Ashley when she's opened up to me.

She went silent at first and I wasn't freaked out.

I should have remembered that's how she deals with things initially but eventually she lets me in.

I had forgotten simply because we hadn't really faced much adversity in the last couple of years.

We're certainly making up for that now!

I've done whatever I possibly can to help Ashley through this crisis.

Everyone has rallied around her like I knew they would.

She is certainly not lacking in a support system these days.

But that hasn't made her magically all better.

I do see some signs of progress but they're small.

And that's why I made a decision.

My girl needs a break.

She needs a chance to think about something other than her own demons.

She needs that more than anything so she doesn't get overwhelmed.

That's why she's in the Spencermobile with me right now.

Blindfolded.

I know what you're thinking.

And you couldn't be more wrong.

I know what you're thinking because that's exactly what Ashley thought when I first told her to put a blindfold on.

But I assured her my motives are not sexual in the least.

Honest!

I've truly missed seeing Ashley smile and I'm crossing my fingers that my surprise will bring her nose crinkle back.

Even if it's only for a short while.

My light bulb moment happened yesterday and I've spent a lot of time since then working all the details out.

The car ride to the mystery location that I'm taking her hasn't been filled with a lot of chatter.

I didn't expect it would be.

But I am glad that Ashley trusted me once she realized I wasn't thinking with the lower half of my body.

I'm only thinking right now with my heart.

My heart that wants nothing more than for hers to start healing.

When I finally stop the car, I help Ashley out and then I look up.

I see her surprise waiting for her just like I planned it.

I stand behind Ashley but I don't say a word.

Instead, I remove her blindfold and let her see for herself what I've done.

She barely has any time to adjust her eyes before a tiny body comes barreling towards her.

"Ashley!" Emily squeals like only a child can.

When Ashley scoops her off the ground to give her a big hug I finally see some joy return to those beautiful brown eyes of hers.

And that makes me happier than I've felt in days.


	19. Chapter 19

**A/N Sorry for the delay...as I mentioned elsewhere I've been distracted by Mario Galaxy...and the G20 riots taking place where I live. I should have another update done this week. Thanks for your feedback, you guys are awesome. Please excuse any errors on this chapter, I wasn't able to get it edited first.**

Chapter 19

I think I'm going to cry.

And they're not sad tears.

They're more like relieved, a tad bit happy, tears.

The reason for me being all choked up is Ashley.

The second Emily jumped into her arms it was like all the tension she'd been feeling since Kyla's arrival and her mother's betrayal, disappeared.

I know that's not actually the case.

I'm not naive enough believe that everything is now honkey dorey. Despite what I'd love to be true, there is no magic solution to make all of this be ok.

At least not in the short term.

But that doesn't mean my girl can't have a break from the suckage that's been her life lately.

That's why I arranged for this little trip to see Emily.

We keep in regular contact with Susan and Marty but it has been some time since we've been able to visit them and their cute as a button daughter.

It doesn't matter that we haven't seen them in months, Emily is still as in love with Ashley as that day she first met her.

Ah, that magical day at Disneyland.

Good times.

Good times.

The feeling is mutual.

Ashley is still absolutely crazy about her number one fan.

Well, her number one child fan.

I'm her number one adult.

Hell yeah!

Not that I'd ever be jealous of little child.

Nope.

Never happened.

Never.

Happened.

Look at me getting distracted again. I should get back on track before any story about me embarrassing myself with irrational jealousy accidentally pops in my head.

When I called Susan and Marty with my idea of temporarily putting a little sunshine into Ashley's life, they were more than happy to help out.

Plus, I made them an offer they couldn't refuse.

And I don't mean that in any kind of sinister way.

"Let's go play!" Emily squeals and it's not a request.

It's an order.

If you think Ashley can't say no to me, you should see her around Emily.

I swear if that kid stayed with us for a week, we'd be bankrupt.

Even with Ashley's twelve and a half million dollar inheritance.

Oh wow.

I nearly forgot about my girl's new found wealth.

But I guess now isn't the right moment to think of all the shiny things she might buy me.

What?

I already mentioned we'd give a lot of it to charity!

Sheesh!

Ashley flashes me a killer smile that makes my heart melt. "I guess I'm needed elsewhere." Then she turns her attention to the girl in her arms. "Ok Em, I'm all yours."

Aw!

She is so darn cute!

And so is Emily.

I'm not even going to mention that she failed to say hello to me.

Not going to mention it at all.

I watch Ashley disappear inside and I know already that tonight is going to be so much fun!

No, we're not back at the Magic Kingdom, we're at a place that's a lot more low key.

With all the tabloid attention that Ashley's been getting lately the last thing she needs is to be in a crowd full of people.

Don't get me wrong, most of her fans are awesome.

But right now it's best for her to lay low and let this blow over. Soon enough someone will do something scandalous and when that happens, Ashley's family drama will be quickly forgotten.

I hope.

Because I really can't take much more of this.

I want my happy, peaceful life back.

And I want it back fairly quickly.

I don't think that's too much to ask.

Do you?

"I thought you guys were never going to get here," Susan says, breaking my thought process. "I was very close to having to give Emily a tranquilizer to calm her down."

Marty slaps her wife before I can respond. "You're awful!"

"I was only teasing," Susan replies as she rolls her eyes. "After all this time, you should know when I'm only goofing around."

I walk towards my friends feeling lighter than I have in a long while. "If you don't stop bickering, Ashley and I will go home and not stay over and you'll have to cancel your plans."

I'm not being serious.

If we did leave, I'm not sure who'd be more upset: Ashley or Emily.

"Everyone is a comedienne," Marty remarks dryly. "Are we going to stand outside and exchange barbs all day, or do you want to come inside?"

"Inside," I mumble, in an effort to appear contrite. "Mom," I cough when I'm right by Susan and that makes her laugh.

Marty turns around to raise her eyebrow at me and Susan. She doesn't say anything but the look on her face says it all.

No more clowning around!

Instead of being a smart ass, I decide to go another route.

That's how stressed out I am!

Ugh.

"So where are you guys heading for your night away?" I ask to deflect attention from my earlier remark.

Being mature is such hard work!

"Susan won't tell me," Marty replies trying to sound annoyed but I can tell she's faking it.

"That's right, I won't," Susan says, sounding proud of herself. "No matter how much you beg me to."

As a thank you for letting us spend time with Emily, her parents have been given a night on the town, including a night at a very fancy hotel and they don't have to pay for anything.

It was the least I could do.

While some people might think they should be paying us for babysitting their daughter they really are doing me a huge favor.

And Ashley of course.

Not to mention I think they made Emily's year.

This what we call a win-win-win-win scenario.

Wait, was that one too many wins?

Oh well.

You get my point.

"Speaking of begging," Susan continues with a twinkle in her eye. "Later tonight..."

The poor woman doesn't get to finish her thought because of the elbow to her side she receives from her wife.

"Too much information," I say as I shake my head. "Too much information."

Marty walks inside the house but I can tell she's not that mad.

Susan and I stare at each other for a few seconds and then we burst out laughing.

We really are a lot a like.

The difference being that I usually just think inappropriate things in my head, while she blurts them out without caring about the reaction she might get.

There is a reason I love her.

Like a sister!

Hello!

I'm a thousand percent committed to Ashley!

Hell yeah I am!

Woo!

Susan, Marty and I spend a few minutes catching up.

It's really nice being with them.

They have no connection to the drama that's been ever present since Kyla's appearance.

And they really are an awesome couple.

"How are you holding up?" Marty asks, her voice laced with concern.

I shrug, "I'm fine, I'm more concerned about Ashley and helping her through all of this."

She is my number one priority.

Marty places her hand on top of mine. In the most platonic of ways! "Yeah, but this can't be easy on you either."

What I'm going through doesn't compare to what my fiance has experienced.

Even if still haven't had sex.

Oops.

How superficial of me!

But, it's so very, very true.

Not that I'm thinking of that right now.

Nope not me.

Because if I was, I'd be some kind of sex-obsessed freak.

Hey!

Why has it gone so quiet all of a sudden?

Hmm...

Back to my original point.

This is my time to shoulder Ashley's well being on my back.

And I have no problem letting that be the case until this is all passed us.

"I'm fine," I assure my friends with a smile.

My severe lack of sex notwithstanding.

"And Ashley, how's she doing?" Susan whispers to avoid a certain brunette overhearing us.

They've seen and heard the stories being told about Ashley.

I've given them an update as well.

Nothing too personal but enough for them to know what the tabloids aren't reporting.

"As good as can be expected," I reply quietly.

And I'm sure she'll be even better after her break from all the craziness.

That's the goal anyway.

"Soon this will all be a distant memory, you'll see." Marty declares with a lot of authority.

"Just because I can't hear what you're discussing exactly, doesn't mean I can't tell I'm the one being discussed." Ashley calls out from upstairs. "Didn't anyone ever tell you that's not a polite thing to do?"

Uh oh.

Busted!

How did she know what we were doing?

Dang.

At least she doesn't sound upset.

The amusement in her voice was evident.

After getting caught by Ashley, the three of us go to join her and Emily so her parent's can say good-bye.

I think they're anxious for their alone time.

I wonder why?

Emily gives them each a quick hug and then she's back by Ashley's side.

If they weren't looking forward to their alone timeI think Susan and Marty might have been a little offended.

But they're not and I can tell that because they leave soon afterwards.

With big smiles on their faces.

Aw!

And a little bit, ew!

I stand in the doorway of Emily's bedroom for a bit so I can watch her and Ashley play.

Well it's more like Emily commanding Ashley to do what she wants, but I don't think Ashley minds.

Even if she is wearing a plastic tiara and sporting an interesting hairdo courtesy of a certain little girl.

Oh, if only her fans could see her now!

* * *

I ended up joining Ashley and Emily for a little bit, but then I left them alone.

I'm not pouting or anything but I actually liked having some time to myself.

I've been so focused on Ashley and her family issues that I have been neglecting me.

And no, I don't mean it in the way you are thinking.

It's just nice to have some peace and quiet, instead of angst and tears.

Talk about an understatement.

The next thing I knew I had fallen asleep on the couch.

I know that because I got woken up by Emily tickling my nose.

And what does that mean?

Yeah, I jumped up screaming "spider, spider, spider," causing her and Ashley to crack up laughing.

They are so lucky I love them as much as I do!

But the sound of Ashley's laughter more than made up for the mini heart attack they gave me.

Barely.

To make up for scaring me half to death, Ashley and her shadow made me a delicious dinner.

My future wife really does know how to cook!

Susan and Marty called to check in on how things were going. After I assured them that their daughter was safe and we hadn't burned down the house, I told them not to call again and that we'd see them tomorrow morning.

They hung up really fast.

As we speak, Ashley is finishing brushing Emily's teeth with her.

And then it's bed time.

I thought at first that Emily would fight us on going to sleep.

But I think Ashley really tired her out.

Plus we promised her we'd buy her a big present if she went to bed without a fight.

Who says bribery can't work on little kids?

"All done," Emily announces as she runs into her room.

I'm sitting on her bed with my back against the wall and she's bouncing up and down beside me.

Where the hell does she get all her energy from?

I need to find out so I can bottle it and then sell it all over the world.

I'd make millions!

Ashley sits down next to Emily so that she's between the two of us.

She looks a little worn out.

That's what trying to keep with a four year old will do to you.

But she also looks content.

And at peace.

It's a great look for her.

"You ready for stories?" Ashley asks the little girl cuddled into her side.

She holds eye contact with me for a few seconds and the expression of love and gratitude I see from her makes me feel warm all over.

It still amazes me that I can love someone as much as I love Ashley.

"Yeah!" Emily replies enthusiastically.

I can only imagine how many books Ashley is going to have to read before she conks out.

I watch Ashley as she starts one of Emily's favorite stories.

I'm not sure why but seeing this side of Ashley tonight is different than the other times we've babysat.

All of a sudden it hits me that I'm hopefully getting a glimpse of my future.

Not my immediate one, but maybe five years from now.

The future that includes not only Ashley, but perhaps a child or two of our own.

Sure we've discussed that possibility.

We've actually discussed it quite a lot.

But there's something different about really visualizing it like I'm doing right now.

And it makes me feel so unbelievably good.

Ashley and I are actually going to have a family together.

How utterly amazing is that?

It makes me look forward to what's to come in a way that I hadn't before.

I catch Ashley's attention again and when our eyes connect this time I realize she's been having the same thoughts that I've been having.

Even with all the crap that we're going through, she's right were I am.

Having the same visions of our future family that I'm seeing.

Maybe that will help her get over her past family.

And help heal the scars on her heart.

She doesn't even get to finish the book she's been reading because Emily is already fast asleep.

I guess she was more tired than I thought she was.

Ashley and I sneak out of her room quietly and then we head to the den to watch a movie cuddled up on the couch together.

Could I come up with something else for us to do?

Yes.

But I don't need _that _to have a good night.

Besides, Ashley cuddles are more than enough for me.

Honest.

* * *

"She's fast asleep," Ashley whispers when she returns to the guest room.

She went to check on Emily before we hit the hay.

It's been a long night.

And an extremely long week.

So even though it's relatively early, we're both ready for some shut eye ourselves.

"I"m not surprised, the two of you didn't stop for a second today," I reply as my girl joins me in bed.

Yay!

More cuddles!

I expect Ashley to turn off the light but she doesn't.

"Thank you so much, Spence," Ashley says, her voice cracking just a bit. "You are amazing."

"Moi?" I ask coyly. "I have no idea what you're talking about."

Ashley flashes me that killer smile of hers. "Yes you do, you know exactly what I mean."

Of course I do.

But despite what you may think I do have a modest side of me.

Plus, I enjoy bantering with Ashley.

It's kind of our thing.

And I've missed doing it with her.

That came out sounding a lot dirtier than I intended.

I shake my head, "Nope, I haven't a clue what you are referring to."

Ashley pulls me close to her and then her eyes turns really intense. "I know this hasn't been easy for you, Spence and I know how worried you are about me."

That's true.

"With you by my side though," Ashley pauses, I think to keep her composure. "What I'm trying to say is thank you for arranging tonight for me."

"For you? I was only thinking of Emily." I smirk. "You really are self centred, Ashley."

My girl chuckles so I decide to push things a little further.

"It's always, me, me, me, when it comes to you." I am having a hard time keeping a straight face. Pun not intended! "I don't know if I can marry someone as selfish as you."

"Wise ass!" Ashley exclaims right before she pins my arms above my head.

Hey!

Who does she think she is?

Hold up.

Ashley has me pinned down at her complete mercy and I'm complaining?

What kind of moron am I?

That was rhetorical.

"I'm trying to have a deep and meaningful conversation with you and you're turning it into a joke?" Ashley moves so she's right on top of me. "How insensitive of you."

I want to make a witty comeback but I'm not able to.

Why you ask?

Well it seems Ashley really is feeling better.

I can tell that because she's now pressing her full body into mine and her mouth is dangerously close to

me.

That's not a bad thing though.

Not at all!

"Yeah, I've been bad," I gulp.

What a surprising turn of events.

There might be a small part of me that wonders if I shouldn't be doing anything with Ashley in someone else's home.

But Emily is asleep.

No one else is here.

And we're consenting adults.

Besides, I've gagged that small part of me so she won't be a problem going forward.

"So bad," Ashley husks out while keeping my hands above my head.

I expect her to give me a really passionate kiss.

I get soft, loving one instead.

"I love you," she whispers sweetly.

"I love you more," I reply just as sweetly.

And I think I'm about to get lucky!

Fuck yeah!

Ashley starts kissing my neck and then she moves to jawline before finishing up right by my ear.

I think a party might be starting in my pants.

And Ashley's invited!

"Don't think I've forgotten that I owe you," Ashley whispers seductively. "Not just for how amazing you've been but also for when we got interrupted."

I don't want her thinking of that day.

Too many bad memories.

Plus it's sexy time!

"And I think it's time to repay my debt to you," she finishes.

And then the party in my pants turns into a fucking rave.

Because that's when Ashley starts grinding into me.

Oh god!

I'm finally going to get a chance to release all the tension I've been feeling.

Oh!

Yeah!

I'm so fucking excited!

Oh god!

Ashley's grinding even harder into me and I'm trying not to moan too loud.

I wonder how quickly I can get both of our clothes off?

Who cares?

I don't even need to be fully naked for this!

All I need is Ashley to stick her hands in my happy place and then I'll see fireworks.

Maybe more than once!

Oh god!

That would be awesome!

I can't believe it's been so long since I've been ravished by Ashley!

But we're about to make up for lost...

And then something horrible happens.

There's a knock on our door.

No, I'm not kidding.

Oh, how I wish I was?

"Ashley?" Emily sounds sleepy but clearly she's awake.

No!

No!

No!

This cannot be happening!

Somebody tell me this cannot be happening!

Ashley jumps off of me and I have to use all my self control not to start swearing.

At least she shoots me an apologetic look before she composes herself.

Thankfully I still have my clothes on so I don't have to worry about getting them back on.

"Everything ok?" Ashley asks when she opens the door.

Emily is rubbing her eyes, "Yeah, but I wanted to sleep with you guys. Is that ok?"

I'm so close to crying right now and not because I'm happy.

"Of course it is," I reply even though I'm miffed.

Not at Emily.

But at her timing.

It sucks.

Still, how can I fault her when she's so cute?

"Yay, sleepover!" She squeals before jumps into bed beside me.

Emily starts giggling and I join her.

So does Ashley.

The only thing I can do right now is laugh.

There are worse problems I could be having and logically I know that.

Even if there seems to be no end to my unlucky streak.

Oh well, I guess there's always tomorrow for that to change.

Right?

But if this is what having kids is going to be like, I might have to reconsider if I want them.

Kidding!

Sort of.


	20. Chapter 20

**A/N Thanks for the feedback everyone, I do appreciate it. I am aiming to update again within the next week. Happy 4th to those of you who celebrate it :)**

Chapter 20

Shhhhhhh...

I have to be vewy, vewy, quiet.

I'm hunting rabbits!

Ok, ok, not really, I've just always wanted to say that.

I do have to be quiet though.

Like ninja-assassin quiet.

The reason for my stealth behavior is Ashley. I'm hoping to avoid her asking questions about where I've been the last few hours.

Don't worry, that sounds a lot worse than the truth.

The truth is I spent the afternoon with two women.

Hey!

Don't judge!

I have needs!

It's been forever since I've had a really good shopping outing, and I was starting to go through withdrawal.

Why?

What did you think I meant?

And they say I have a dirty mind!

Moving on...

Jessie was with me.

Obviously.

She would have killed me if I didn't invite her to come with.

And we were also joined by another person who shall remain nameless.

I've decided to conceal her identity to protect the innocent.

The innocent being me.

There is nothing anybody can do or say to get me to reveal who our mystery shopping partner was.

Nothing!

Do you hear me?

Nothing!

Ok, ok, Kyla was the other person who tagged along on my shopping excursion.

Dang.

That was supposed to be a secret!

And that's why I'm in the process of sneaking into my own home.

I really don't want to explain who I've hung out with all afternoon.

Ashley has been in a song writing session for the last number of hours with a few other people . Hopefully that means she didn't even realize I've been gone.

As I've mentioned before, and it's still true, I really hate lying to my future wife.

It makes me feel all icky inside.

And dirty.

Not the good kind of dirty!

That's why my avoid-Ashley-at-all-costs plan is genius.

If I do say so myself.

That way she can't ask me where I was, and I don't have to lie to her.

See!

I am one diabolical genius.

I know what you're thinking.

You're thinking that I'm getting off on a technicality.

And you're right.

But here's the thing.

That's the only way I have been getting off lately.

Oh, I'm sorry, was that a bit of an over share on my part?

Well you know what, that's just too bad.

I don't even want to tell you how long it's been, because if I do, I might start to cry.

Seriously.

Ok, ok, you want to know?

Well, it's been three weeks since our sleepover with Emily and at that point I'd already been practicing to be a nun.

I'll let you do the rest of the math.

Did you need a calculator to figure the answer out?

One month.

One fucking month.

One long fucking month.

One excruciatingly long fucking month.

One excruciatingly long fucking month without any fucking.

Where are my manners?

I mean one whole month without getting to make sweet, sweet love to the woman of my dreams.

Yeah.

That's right.

Can you believe it?

Well I can't either!

Gah!

There are no words that could possibly explain the level of frustration I'm currently experiencing.

I never thought I'd go this long without sex after I met Ashley.

I mean, yeah, there were those two weeks when she was touring and I wasn't with her, but that's not the same.

We weren't sharing the same house.

Or the same fucking bed!

My apologies.

I'm letting myself get all worked up, and goodness knows I won't get relief with that anytime soon.

After our stay with Emily I was sure my dry spell would end.

But Ashley was still a bit emotionally fragile because another tabloid story broke about her relationship with her stupid selfish whore of a former mother.

So I had to comfort her and such, all the while keeping my libido in check.

Then, when Ashley got over that she was called to New York by her fucking selfish record label.

Jackasses!

I nearly cried when I found out she'd be away.

Boo!

Hiss!

I was so sad.

Then Ashley returned, and well, there were certain feminine reasons on my end that my foray in celibacy had to remain in tact.

Gah!

What an amazingly horrible and maddening month.

I'm just glad it's over.

Now maybe things can get back on track.

And by things I mean my sex life.

And my back on track I mean I plan on ravishing Ashley for days and vice versa.

Hell fucking yeah I do!

You know what I just realized?

My original point of why I had to sneak into my own home got horribly sidetracked by my lack of satisfaction in the bedroom.

My mind is acting all screwy.

More than normal!

If I don't get some release soon I'm bound to burst.

And not the toe-curling orgasmic kind of bursting!

So, back to what I was telling you about me not wanting to lie to Ashley. I'm trying to be patient and understanding about her lack of desire to have a sisterly relationship with Kyla.

I really am.

Honest!

So I don't really advertise that I've been spending a lot of time with her.

Ashley's not stupid though.

She knows I've been going over to my mom's a lot.

She also knows that Kyla lives there.

Even though math isn't her strong suit, I'm sure she's put two and two together and figured out what's going on.

Speaking of math, maybe I can convince Ashley that tonight me plus her should equal sixty-nine.

What?

I can't help it!

A whole fucking month!

I shouldn't be held responsible for my thoughts right now.

That wouldn't be fair!

Ashley hasn't said one word about Kyla the last few weeks.

Instead of dealing with her presence, she's simply ignored the fact that she has a sister.

And that's a shame.

A really big shame.

Because I have to tell you, I really, really like Kyla.

Sure she's young, a little clueless and a bit of a nerd but she's also really sweet and we get a long quite well. Even though she didn't grow up with Ashley, I can see the resemblance in certain things they do or certain mannerisms they share.

I think Ashley would really like her too, if she gave her a chance.

But I can't say that.

Or anything else about this situation apparently.

Every time I do, I either get shot down or ignored.

Just like when I'm trying to have sex with her!

Kidding!

Not!

I have kept my mouth shut though for the most part, but it's getting harder and harder to keep my thoughts on what's going on to myself.

Le sigh.

Something needs to give or else.

Let's just hope that happens soon because the other day I detected a small wrinkle forming by my eye.

I was horrified!

Absolutely horrified!

Living in L.A. makes a person terrified of wrinkles.

Not to worry though, I'm not about to do anything drastic, like using too much botox that I can't even smile.

Those women look freaky!

"There you are!"

Holy shit!

I was so deep in thought that I didn't hear Ashley enter our bedroom!

She just startled me so much!

Oh no!

I was so busy talking to myself I didn't put my shopping bags away!

Crap!

"Hey, Ash," I reply as I try to slow my racing heart down.

Maybe I should just rip my clothes off, then rip Ashley's off too so we can have sex and I can avoid an awkward situation.

Wait.

What am even I thinking?

I don't need to have any kind of reason to fornicate with my fiance!

Yay!

I think sex is a marvelous idea!

Who's with me?

Hopefully Ashley is!

Woo!

Hoo!

I hear Ashley chuckling and once again she brings me out of my wacky brain.

"Oh, so that's where you were," she states when her eyes fall on my numerous shopping bags. "Tell me: is there any money at all left in our account after all the damage you did?"

"Ha! Good one, Ash," I nervously laugh while hoping she doesn't notice I'm acting weird. "You're so funny!"

"You ok?" she asks because I'm pretty sure she's noticing my shifty eyes. "Maybe all that shopping wore you out."

I need a way out of this mess and I need it now!

"I am one hundred percent a-ok," I reply with a cheesy grin.

Damn.

I so suck at lying.

I'm in big trouble!

Boo!

Hiss!

You know what that means?

No sex!

Woe is me!

Woe is me so much!

I think this situation calls for a head tilt.

I don't get a chance to do that though because Ashley walks over to me. She frowns and then she places her hand on my forehead. "Hmm, you don't feel like you're running a fever."

"I"m fine!" I shriek to indicate I'm clearly not. "Anyway, why don't you tell me how your song writing session went."

There we go.

Just turn this conversation away from my shopping venture and everything will be fine.

I am so smart!

"It was ok but nothing special," Ashley tells me as she flops down on our bed. I should so join her! "I'm sure you had more fun than me. Did you go with Jessie and Glen?"

Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck!

What's with the third degree?

I just need to bite the bullet on this one and then move on.

Ashley can have some weird freak out about me spending time with Kyla. We'll deal and then the make-up and no-sex-for-a-month sex can begin.

Fucking right it will!

I bury my head in my closet so I don't have to make eye contact with Ashley when I reveal the awful truth to her. "No, actually, I went with Jessie and Kyla."

Oh no!

Here it comes!

A big dramatic scene!

I hope there are no tears!

It's so hard for me to see Ashley cry!

I close my eyes as I brace myself for her reaction.

"Cool," she says without sounding mad. "What did you want to do for dinner?"

Huh?

What's up with that?

She's not mad?

Yay!

I didn't upset her!

That means there should be absolutely no reason for us not to be naked in about fifteen seconds.

Double yay!

You know that her non-reaction to Kyla is not a good thing.

No!

No!

No!

I can't believe my inner voice is returning at a time like this!

I am just going to block my ears and ignore it!

No, you aren't, because you are well aware of how right I am.

Damn it!

I hate my stupid mind!

It's always getting me into trouble!

The fact that it's been a month since Kyla first appeared without any real progress being made is troublesome to say the least.

Obviously at first Ashley was in too much shock to deal with anything. Then her "mom" decided to put herself in the running for the worst mother in the world award.

I do get how much that probably set Ashley back, but she has to move forward for this to start getting resolved.

And guess who gets the lovely job of telling her that?

It is so hard to be me sometimes.

So fucking hard!

I let out the biggest sigh before heading out to talk to my wife-to-be about a topic that I don't like.

Maybe Ashley will surprise me.

Maybe she'll tell me that I did the right thing confronting her and getting her to face what she's been running from.

Maybe we'll go back to normal immediately and I won't be able to walk for days because of all the sex we'll have.

A girl can dream can't she?

"How long is this going to go on?" I ask when I'm back in our bedroom.

Yikes.

That came out a lot harsher than I wanted it to.

Ashley looks rightfully confused. "Uhm, if you don't want to talk about dinner, we can order in."

I join my brunette hottie on our bed, but unfortunately I keep our clothes on.

Boo!

Hiss!

What's wrong with me?

"That's not what I meant," I say without sounding combative. I take Ashley's hands in mind after I've pulled her up so we're sitting close together. "I meant how long are you going to pretend that Kyla doesn't exist?"

There.

I think that sounded pretty good on my part.

I was direct without being judgmental.

Go me!

Maybe there's a chance for this to work out after all.

"We're not talking about this," Ashley responds strongly dashing all my hopes for a peaceful resolution to our conversation.

Perhaps I should drop this topic and move one.

Perhaps I should, but I won't.

I just don't have the energy anymore to ignore the elephant in the room.

Not that I'm calling Kyla an elephant or anything, that would be rude.

It's just an expression!

"Actually, I think we are," I reply without letting go of Ashley's hands. "It's been a month, Ashley. Don't you think it's time you got to know your sister?"

"She's not my sister!" Ashley roars and then she looks rightfully ashamed by her outburst. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to yell at you like that, but I am not in the mood to deal with all of this today/"

I am trying so hard to be understanding and non confrontational. "And when do you anticipate being in the mood? A week from now? Months? Years? You can't run from this, Ash, you really can't."

That's right, Spencer, stay calm.

Stay calm.

I hope Ashley is having the same thoughts in her head.

Sure my response was a tad on the sarcastic side but I'm not yelling or losing my cool.

That's something.

Right?

"How about never?" Ashley snaps. "That girl is not my sister, and I don't care what any piece of paper says."

"Yes, she is," I say even though I'm probably hurting her. In the long run, her method of avoidance and running away will hurt her a lot more. "And the sooner you accept that, the sooner you can start getting to know her."

Wow!

Even I'm surprised by how straightforward I'm being.

Maybe no sex makes Spencer a rational girl.

Nah.

I don't think that's ever possible.

"You promised that you wouldn't push me on this," Ashley points out and it almost sounds like she's whining.

I keep my voice soft to avoid escalating things further. "It's been a month, Ash." A month without sex! "And you're acting like everything is normal when it's not."

Did I mention in all that time we haven't had sex?

Ok, ok, I get it, you're sick of hearing me complain about my lack of a sex life.

I won't ever mention it again.

Yeah.

Right.

"Nothing has changed for me," Ashley obstinately states. "Can we drop this now?"

I try to hide my disappointment, but I'm almost certain I'm unsuccessful. "No, I really don't think we can. I would love to have everything go back to where we were four weeks ago, but that's not possible."

Oh how I wish it was.

Because four weeks ago I was getting that thing I'm not supposed to mention on a very regular basis.

This is too important for me to let go however.

Not only for Ashley, but for us as well.

And I'm really not talking about our dry spell.

A successful relationship can't happen when one person is always walking around on egg shells afraid to say the wrong thing. Or when one person is clearly going through a rough time, but instead of dealing with the problem, they act like nothing out of the ordinary is happening.

So many times over the last month Ashley has been off in her own little world.

I know that's how she deals with her emotions, but she's in real danger of hiding her feelings until it all gets too much for her.

That's not healthy.

At all.

Besides all of that though, when times get rough in the future, regardless of the circumstances, she has to learn to tackle them before they get out of control.

If she had attempted to try at least talk to Kyla a couple of weeks ago, she'd be on the road to normalcy, instead of being stuck in this limbo land.

It's not good for her.

And it's certainly no fun for me.

"I know it's not possible!" Ashley is clearly not happy with the way our heart-to-heart is heading. "But I'm not changing my mind. That girl has no place in my life and she never will."

I wish I knew how to reach Ashley.

How to get her to release a lot of that anger and resentment she's holding onto.

Her life is going to be so much better when she does.

And let's be honest, she has a pretty good life, up until recently.

I think I have to do now what I've been reluctant to do since Kyla's existence became known.

You might want to close your eyes.

This could get real ugly.

"None of this is Kyla's fault," I begin with a heavy heart. "She's not the one you're mad at."

Ashley's hands leave mine much like I thought they would. "Don't go there, Spencer. I mean it."

"I'm sorry, but I have to," I tell her because it's the truth. "She's an innocent bystander like you are in this situation, and deep down you know that."

I hate being the bad cop.

Especially when it doesn't involve handcuffs and getting punished in a sexy way.

"Why are you pushing me?" Ashley asks as her eyes tear up. "Just leave it alone."

I shake my head. "I would love to, but I can't..."

"Stop saying that!" Ashley stands up but she doesn't leave the room. "You have no clue what I've gone through and what it's been like for me..."

"You're right, I don't," I cut in. "But that doesn't mean I don't get a say here. At some point you need to admit that the person you're really mad at is your dad."

Oh my god!

I actually said it!

I didn't think I'd have the guts.

Ashley's eyes turn from tears to fire almost instantly.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" Ashley barks out at me. "You have no right to say anything about my dad. No right!"

My stomach is on fire.

Arguing with Ashley is bad for my health!

"I'm not trying to badmouth him," I explain as I do everything possible to remain level headed, but a lump is forming in my throat. "But he's the one that lied to you about Kyla, and he's the one that kept you from knowing your sister until now."

"I can't believe you," Ashley remarks bitterly. "This discussion is over."

She goes to leave but before she does, I step in front of her. "No, it's not. I really wish you'd stop running away from me."

"And I wish you'd stop sticking your nose in where it doesn't belong," Ashley fires back. "I asked you to give me space and let me deal with this at my own pace. But you couldn't even do that for me."

I'm doing my damnedest not get offended by Ashley's words because I know she's hurting.

It's hard though because she's acting like I'm not being considerate of her feelings.

Not to toot my own horn or anything but I think I've been pretty darn understanding of what she's been going through.

A lot of what I've done over the last month has been with her in mind.

So it irks me that she's implying that I'm being selfish by not respecting what she wants.

Like the song goes anyway, you can't always get what you want.

And that's why I'm making her face what she has to face in order to move on.

"I'm doing what needs to be done." If Ashley thinks I'm going to back down, especially now, she's sadly mistaken. "You can be mad at your dad, Ash, it doesn't mean you love him any less."

"Shut up!" Ashley orders.

"I know you think you're the one who's gotten the raw deal, but at least you knew your dad." Everything I've been holding in is about to come pouring out. "You have some memories of him, he spent time with you, he bragged about you to people, and while he missed big chunks of your childhood, he was there for some of your important events. Kyla had none of that, and now you won't even acknowledge her existence. I can't even imagine how much that must be hurting her."

Have I crossed a line?

I don't think so, but I might be biased.

"You're actually taking her side?" Ashley asks without addressing anything I've said.

"Stop making this about me," I reply.

See, I can avoid things too!

"I don't think I'm the one doing that," Ashley says sarcastically.

"I'm sorry you can't or won't see that all I'm doing is trying to help." I'm almost at the end of my rope. "I love you more than anything, Ash, and all I want is for you to be happy."

"Then leave me the fuck alone!" she yells even though I've kept my tone fairly neutral. "And keep your opinions about my dad to yourself."

You'd think I'd be angry right now.

But I'm not.

I'm just sad.

Sad and tired.

I've spent so much energy lately worrying about Ashley and trying to think of ways to help her that I'm exhausted.

I should probably continue arguing with her until she see's how wrong she's being, but I don't really want to.

Not when I'm going to get screamed at for something that isn't my fault.

I don't think I can do anything more for Ashley anyways.

She can keep living in the past instead of eyeing her future or she can finally do the right thing.

"I love you," I tell her before I turn around and walk away.

The next part of what happens is entirely up to her.

I hope she makes the right decision.

And I hope she understands why I left.

I get in the Spencermobile and when I start driving I can't keep the tears I'd been holding back earlier from falling.

What the hell just happened?

And how in the world is this going to get fixed?


	21. Chapter 21

**A/N Thanks all for your feedback, it is really appreciated. I'll try to have the next update done soon.**

**ETA: I meant to edit something in this chapter but I deleted it by accident...oops. Nothing has really changed from what was previously posted.**

**Happy Sunday :)  
**

Chapter 21

I am so sad.

I feel really bad.

Ashley's the best lover I've ever had.

When this is all over, I'll be glad.

And that's all I've got.

A poet I am not.

But you know what I am?

I am so sad!

I think it's safe to say that since Ashley and I have been an official couple that's the worst disagreement we've experienced.

It wasn't really a fight.

It was more Ashley ignoring her problems and me in turn, putting my foot down.

There's only so much I can take before I can't take it anymore.

I'm at the end of my rope.

I hope Ashley doesn't feel like I've abandoned her.

Because that's not my intention.

And I also hope she realizes that this isn't me breaking up with her.

That would be crazy!

Loony!

Screwy even!

I don't know how many different ways I can put this because I think I've been clear about my intentions.

I am one hundred percent committed Ashley.

While I believe that she could have handled herself better, and that she was unnecessarily harsh with me at times, it doesn't mean I'm going to end things between us.

Bite your tongue!

I would never, ever, ever, do something that stupid!

Ok, ok, I did technically leave Ashley, but you know what I mean.

This is just a temporary situation.

A minor glitch in Team Spashley's agenda.

I worry a little that Ashley is panicking because I've walked out.

But I'm fairly confident that the three years we've spent together, building a solid foundation, will make her realize I would never do that.

Yeah, I do know that never is a strong word.

And I stand by that statement.

I cannot fathom a possible scenario where I wouldn't be with Ashley.

I really and truly can't.

Anyway, I'll check on her in a little bit if I don't hear from her, but right now I have to clear my head.

It's been overloaded lately and tonight it might have short-circuited.

I deserve a break.

So I'm about to see someone who I know will give me exactly what I need.

"Spencer, what are you doing here?"

Madison's voice makes me jump because I was so deep in thought. "I came to see my dad," I tell her as I shift around in the chair outside his office. I called my dad after I left Ashley, and even though he's swamped with meetings, he insisted I come right over. "You're here late, are you still working?"

"Unfortunately, yes," Madison replies with a big sigh. "We are absolutely swamped these days."

Don't I know it, my mom won't stop complaining about the long hours my dad is working.

After my crisis with Ashley is solved, I think an intervention is in order.

,

My dad is a bit of a work-o-holic, if you haven't noticed, and I fear that his behavior might cost him one marriage.

I can't think of that right now because my stomach can only handle so much stress.

I don't want to get an ulcer!

"My sympathies," I say as I slump in my chair. I think I'm on the verge of a major outbreak of pouting.

I contemplated going to Jessie after I left home, but she's heading out of town tomorrow, and I think she wants to spend the night with the wife before she has to go.

I understand completely.

Goodbye sex can be awesome!

Not that I even remember what sex is anymore.

How depressing!

And Glen is still out of the question in terms of going to him for advice.

We're not exactly on speaking terms right now.

Is it me, or do a lot of crappy things seem to happening all at once to me and the people I love?

"I know we're not friends or anything," Madison begins and then she takes a seat beside me. "But if you need someone to talk to you, I can be a good listener."

I give Madison a sad smile. "Is it that obvious?"

She returns my smile. "Pretty much, yeah. You look like someone who just went through the ringer."

Ouch.

And thanks for that honesty.

Boo!

Hiss!

Madison is back to being evil!

At least she's not hitting on me.

Thank goodness for small miracles.

I don't really know if I can confide in Madison.

Like she said, we're not friends.

We're not best buds.

We're not even acquaintances really.

And I don't want to betray any confidence when it comes to Ashley. It's not that I think Madison is untrustworthy, but I'm very protective of my stubborn, yet sexy, brunette.

"Whatever it is, I'm sure it will blow over soon." Please let that be true! "And if I am to assume that this has something to do with Ashley, don't worry, you guys will be fine."

I take it back, Madison is freaking genius!

"What makes you so sure?" I ask curiously. I mean she doesn't really have a clue what is actually going on.

Madison rolls her eyes, but I can tell she's only teasing. "Because, Carlin, all anyone has to do is spend five seconds with the two of you to know how in love with each other you are."

But love isn't everything.

I think Aiden and Glen are a good example of that.

And so are my parents.

Not that I'm freaking out about me and Ashley, I'm just making a point.

"Thanks," I reply sincerely. "I really appreciate you saying that."

Madison gives me one of her patented smirks. "Now don't go thinking I'm a softy or anything, I just wanted you to stop looking sad."

Whatever.

I know enough about her from her friendship with Jessie to know that Madison is more bark than bite.

"Of course, I wouldn't have thought anything else," I tease.

Madison and I don't get a chance to banter anymore because my dad emerges from his office. He tells her to head home and then he ushers me inside.

It takes about two seconds for me to spill my heart out.

I need a second opinion about my actions tonight. Because the longer I don't hear from Ashley, the more I think I might have pushed her too far.

Sure, it's only been a few hours since I left but still.

Silence, when it comes to my love, isn't a good thing.

At all.

"So?" I ask when I finish speaking. "What's the verdict?"

My dad comes over to the couch and then he puts his arm on my shoulder. "I think you did exactly what had to be done, Spence."

"You really think that?" I still have my doubts. "I was worried I should have been more understanding."

"You can only do so much, the rest is up to Ashley," my dad replies. "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make them drink."

Oh my god!

Did my dad just call Ashley a horse!

How rude!

I know she's going though an ordeal but there's no need insult her!

He just made my list!

Wait a second.

I think that actually just made sense to me.

Oops.

I guess that must be some kind of famous expression I've never heard of before.

Don't I feel blonde!

"Thanks," I tell him and that's when I notice how tired he looks. I bet Madison has never insulted him like she did me! So what if he's her boss! "When's the last time you had a good night's sleep?"

My dad chuckles. "Hey, I thought you were here to get advice from me?"

"Don't change the subject on me, buster." I poke him a few times in the chest to let him know I'm serious. Knowing he supports the way I acted with Ashley has made me feel a lot better and the time for dealing with his working problem is now. "When's the last time you left here before dark?."

I watch my dad get up and then he pours himself a drink.

That's new.

Yikes.

My tummy is starting to hurt.

I should have waited to handle this.

Damn!

I can't imagine my parents not together.

I really and truly can't.

They're just one of those couples that's meant to be.

Just like another couple whose names rhyme with Fencer and Bashley.

"We're swamped, I can't leave," my dad explains with a shrug of his shoulders. "Unless you want to come back to work here."

Huh.

Say what?

I didn't quite make that out?

I already have a job.

One that pays me with Ashley kisses.

Like a MasterCard commercial would say: that's priceless!

"Are you serious?" I inquire and I hope he says no.

I hope that a ton!

My dad hesitates for a few seconds.

Oh no!

How am I going to turn him down!

I have too much on my plate!

Not just with Ashley's career.

Or her drama.

But soon it's going to be wedding planning time!

That's going to take all my time and effort!

"I was only joking," my dad eventually replies, but I'm not convinced he's telling me the truth.

On the plus side, I don't have to come back to a place that worked me too hard.

It was like a sweatshop here at times!

What?

"That's what I thought," I say while sighing in relief. "But you really should go home and spend time with your wife."

I hope he takes my advice,

"Hey! Who's the parent here and who's the child?" my dad laughs before he gives me a hug. "Don't worry about me, I'll worry about you, that's my job."

"This isn't over, I'm coming back in fifteen minutes to make sure you leave," I warn.

I'm bluffing.

But he doesn't have to know that!

Maybe Team Parthur needs to be formed so I'm not the child of a divorce.

I guess that means I'll have to make contact with Glen.

Ass!

But it's for a good cause so, we'll see.

"Goodbye, Spencer," my dad deadpans, but I can tell he's not mad.

I'm not really sure where to go now.

Maybe I should contact Ashley.

What?

I'm not giving in!

I'm not!

My phone vibrating cuts into my inner argument.

Saved by the bell!

I loved that show by the way.

How random of me to mention, I know.

But I never understood the last season when that weird Tori girl was on by then Kelly and Jessie disappeared for a number of episodes. But they came back for the prom and the last episode.

So weird!

What?

It just popped in my head!

Sorry.

Not!

I should probably check my text message before things get out of hand.

I look down at my phone and see the following message:

_Can you please meet me at your parent's house?_

_I love you._

_Ash _

_xx_

Aw.

She's so sweet!

My parents house?

I wonder why she wants to meet me there?

Oh no!

What if she's going over there to kill Kyla?

What if I pushed her into dealing with her problems so she's decided to murder her sister?

No!

No!

No!

That would be horrible!

Ashley cannot go to prison!

I'd miss her too much!

I really need a vacation.

This stress is getting to me.

I send Ashley a quick message back letting her know I'll be there shortly.

I guess this can go one of two ways.

Really, really well.

Or really, really ugly.

I'm hoping for option number one!

Please let that be the case!

Please!

* * *

I pull into my parent's driveway after a calm peaceful drive.

Or, you know, a drive where people kept cutting me off and doing stupid things.

L.A. traffic is murder!

Absolute murder.

Speaking of murder, Ashley's waiting for me in the driveway.

No, I don't _actually _think her intentions are homicidal.

It's just my way of dealing with the now present anxiety that's residing on my chest.

Ashley's sitting on the back of her car and the expression on her stunning face is decidedly neutral.

I take a deep breath before I get out to talk to her.

I'm not sure what she's going to say.

I'm not sure what I'm going to say.

So much uncertainty.

Boo!

Hiss!

Ashley's eyes have been on me the whole time I've slowly made my way over to her. I still can't figure out where her head is at, and that's increasing the anxiety I'm feeling.

I don't have a chance to ask Ashley why she wanted me to meet me here because as soon as I'm in striking distance, she pulls me towards her and then she kisses me.

Yay!

Ashley kisses!

But...

I know, stupid voice, but we can't resolve this with kisses.

Ashley pulls back, but she keeps me close to her. "I love you too," she whispers, her eyes moist. "I didn't get a chance to say that to you before you left."

"That's ok, I know you do," I reply.

How true!

Ashley shakes her head, "It doesn't matter, I had to tell you." She's acting off, but I'm not going to make her go at a pace faster than she's comfortable with. "You're the most important person in my life, Spence, and I'd be lost without you."

Aw!

My anxiety is easing and my heart a flutter.

Only Ashley can get me to react like this.

I have to make sure though that we actually discuss what happened. Because as nice as swooning is, it's not the solution to resolve what's been going on.

"I owe you on apology," Ashley continues before I can get a word in. "I'm sorry for how I've been acting and how short I've been with you lately."

There's such a joke to be made because of that comment.

But I won't make it.

This is too important!

"It's ok." I try to brush off Ashley's behavior even though I'm glad she recognizes how strained things have been over the last few weeks. I don't want to make her feel worse than she probably does already. "I know you didn't mean it."

"But that doesn't make it right," Ashley counters and I can't really fault her logic. "You've been my rock, Spence, more than you will ever know and the last thing I wanted to, or should have done, is push you away."

Aw!

She's being adorable!

Her words are sweet and sincere!

But there's still so much more that needs to be hashed out.

"Why did you?" I ask. I think it's important to know the answer. "Push me away," I clarify when I see the confusion on Ashley's face.

She lets out an exasperated sigh, but I can tell that the lines of communication are still open. "I've thought about that a lot since this afternoon and I think it's because I know how much you love me."

Huh?

That doesn't make sense.

"You love me a lot and that's why you took things out on me?" I inquire because I'm terribly confused.

I blame stress!

It's turned my brain to mush!

"So much of my life I've been sure that people would leave me." Ashley's voice is barely audible. "But with you, I don't have to worry about that happening. I was feeling so much anger and so out of control that I knew in the back of my mind I could unload on you and you'd still be there for me. You'd always be there for me."

Oh.

That makes more sense.

And aw!

How right she is!

"Except for today," I joke and much to my relief, I get a smile from the girl of my dreams. "Sorry about that."

I still feel a tiny bit bad for walking away.

"You did what you had to do," Ashley replies and the expression she's sporting tells me I probably shouldn't fight her on this point. "You made me face what I'd been too scared to face since Kyla showed up."

Oh my god!

She said her name!

Ashley's hardly ever said Kyla's name.

Progress people.

We might actually be witnessing some progress!

Yay!

"You were so right about my reactions and my reluctance to lay any of this on my father," Ashley says and her voice starts to crack a little. "He's the one I've been mad at the whole time."

"I know," I respond. "But like I told you before, it doesn't mean you don't still love him..."

"It's not just that," Ashley cuts in before I can get anything else out. "Yeah, I've been angry with what he did but that's not the only reason I refused to have anything to do with Kyla."

She said her name again!

It may seem like such a small point, but to me it's huge.

Enough about my thoughts, let's hear what the sexiest woman in the world has to say.

"I got so little from my dad. So little of his time, so little of his attention and so little of his love. At least that's what it felt like when I was a kid." Ashley is sliding her fingers in and out of my hand while she speaks. "So when this other person showed up that also claimed to be his kid I felt like I had to grab onto anything that reminded me of him, without letting them get close."

"So you felt threatened?" I want to make sure I'm not misunderstanding her.

Ashley nods. "Yeah, I felt like if I had to share what I remember about him and our memories, it would somehow weaken our relationship. That I would lose him all over again because he wouldn't be just mine. Does that make sense?"

"It does," I assure her. "But you could have told me that."

I'm not trying to be confrontational.

I need Ashley to know she can come to me with her feelings.

Even when she's upset.

Or sad.

Or angry.

Or anything that's difficult.

I need her to know that my job is to support her, not judge her.

It's my turn now to get out what's on my mind.

"I can't even begin to understand what you've been going through, Ash." I hope this doesn't turn into a fight, but I have to be honest with her when she's been honest with me. "It scares me though when you shut down or lash out at me. I worry sometimes that if something bad happens down the road and it gets too much that you won't know how to deal with it."

That scares me so much.

Maybe it's not a legitimate concern, but I think with the way the last month has played out, it's a valid point.

I need to know that when the chips are down, even if Ashley is completely overwhelmed, running from her problem or our problem won't be something I'll have to worry about.

Don't get me wrong, she's been practically perfect since we started our relationship.

As soon as things got rough however, she reverted back to closed off, angry Ashley.

And I can't help but wondering if it's always going to be a pattern with her.

That's why I'm bringing this up today.

Right now.

Because it's too critical not to address.

"I guess I deserve that," Ashley replies and I'm glad she's not mad at me for what I said. "I don't want that either, Spence. I really don't."

I press my lips against Ashley's for the briefest of moments. "Promise me you'll work on it?"

That's all I can ask from her.

I trust Ashley.

And I have faith in her.

She's already proven that she can come through when it counts.

"I promise," she pledges and I'm confident she means it. "You're too important and what we have is too important for me not to try."

Aw!

My girl!

She's so cute.

"Is there anything else?" I get the feeling that there is so I might as well be direct about it.

Ashley looks sheepish and that makes me curious. "I guess I was also a little bit jealous." Her voice is so quiet I barely understood her.

"Of Kyla?" Ashley nods her head, perplexing me so. "You think that there's something going on with your sister? That's disgusting, I would never..."

"No!" Ashley exclaims forcefully. "Not that kind of jealousy."

Good.

Because that's gross.

No offense to Kyla or anything.

Plus I'm with the best girl in the world. Why would I need or want anyone else?

I wouldn't!

Ashley's cheeks are reddening and I have to remind myself not to get distracted by her cuteness. "You started spending so much time with her, she's staying with your parent's, and I know she's hung out with Jessie a few times. I uh...I guess I felt like Kyla was coming here and taking the people I love from me."

Aw!

Aw!

Aw!

I wish you could see how adorable Ashley looks right now.

I could just eat her up.

And I will.

Later!

Good one!

"Ash!' I say with a lot of affection in my voice. "That's never going to happen. Nobody wants to replace you, and nobody is going to love you any less."

It's unpossible.

Yeah, I know that's not a real word.

But I'm fond of it, so leave me alone, grammar police.

"I did mention to you that I have issues with love, seeing as I had a really shitty childhood?" Ashley jokes. "You did know that, right?"

"How could I forget?" I joke right back. "You're so needy."

Ashley slaps me lightly on the arm. "Too soon, Spence, too soon."

She's not being serious.

I know this because the sparkle in her eyes is back.

Those wonderful eyes that I love getting lost in.

I place my lips against Ashley's a second time, but I let them linger there longer.

Yeah I do!

Because I think the moment I've been waiting for an eternity is around the corner.

You know what I'm talking about!

Right?

Her lips leave mine and I can't say I'm surprised.

Boo!

Hiss!

I'm devastated.

"Come inside with me?" Ash asks before she threads her finger's through mine.

Wait.

Is that innuendo?

I can't tell!

It's probably not because we're at my parents', but I'm still confused as to what she wants.

"I think it's time I was properly introduced to my sister," she explains when I don't move.

Oh my god!

Did I hear right?

She used the 'S' word!

Aw!

I think Ashley has finally had the breakthrough we've all been waiting for.

Yay!

I knew she would step up to the plate eventually.

My girl just hit a touchdown!

And I couldn't be prouder!


	22. Chapter 22

**A/N - My apologies for the huge delay and huge gap between updates. My New Years resolution is to finish this fic. Thanks to anyone who is left reading this, I hope you enjoy.**

Chapter 22

Zip-A-Dee Doo Da!

Zip-A-Dee Yah!

My oh my, what a wonderful day!

Ashley's family drama will soon be over!

And I am...so gay!

Holy cow!

I cannot even explain how relived and amazing I feel right now.

It might have taken Ashley longer than I hoped to reach this point, but the important thing is, she did!

That's my girl!

My girl!

Happy sigh.

That never gets old.

Moving on.

I know Ashley and Kyla's relationship will take time to form and that's ok. They can't just instantly form a bond because of shared DNA.

I get that.

But I strongly believe those two are on the road to something great.

Awesome!

I have such warm and fuzzies right now just thinking about it!

Ashley gives my hand a couple of squeezes and when I look over at her I can tell she's really nervous.

I flash her a reassuring smile and I hope it helps.

Honestly though, I've done all I can for her.

The rest is up to the hottest, sexiest, most divine, woman in the world.

Oh my god!

I just realized something!

Oh my god!

If Ashley resolves things with Kyla, does that mean we get to have sex?

Oh my god!

My long torturous nightmare might be coming - - pun intended - - to an end.

Oh my god!

I do believe in miracles!

Wait a second...

I can't go there.

No, really I can't.

If my sex famished mind goes to where it desperately wants to go, the very important sister reunion that's about to take place will get derailed.

I can't let that happen.

I won't let that happen.

No matter how much my libido is telling me otherwise.

Boo!

Hiss!

I'm way too responsible!

It's really hard being me sometimes!

Luckily, I'm a few hours away from having the mother of all dry spells end.

Hell yeah!

Ashley keeps looking at me and I really hope she can't tell what I'm thinking. I can't risk my woman getting distracted from her mission.

That would not be cool.

At all.

I expel as many sexual thoughts from my mind as humanly possible. It's not easy, but it had to be done.

Now my energy can be focused on where it's needed the most.

Being responsible is hard work!

I open the door to my parents' house and I can only imagine how nervous Ashley is. She's maintaining a cool exterior, but I can see through that.

She'll be fine though.

Of that I have no doubt.

I hope Kyla doesn't shoot Ashley down when she tries to make peace.

I'd understand if she did, but I'm going to cross my fingers that doesn't happen.

I'd cross my eyes too if I could.

I guess we will just have to wait and see what happens.

I'm so nervous!

This is such a huge step for my love.

I don't want her to get tripped up.

That's my thing!

"Hello?" My mom shouts from what I assume to be the kitchen.

I have no clue if she's expecting us.

Ashley might have warned her that we're coming over, but I wouldn't know if that's the case.

"Hey Mom," I shout back because my future wife has gone mute. "Ashley and I came over for a visit."

Speaking of Ashley, she has a death grip on my hand.

Ow!

But the pain is worth it because I know how significant what's about to take place is.

I expect to feel some sort of resistance from Ashley as I move us to the kitchen.

I get none though.

I love determined Ashley.

She's so sexy!

And hot!

Gah!

Must not have sexy thoughts!

Must not have sexy thoughts!

Must not have sexy thoughts!

I just have to hold on a bit longer and then I can unleash everything I've been holding back.

Oh!

Yeah!

My stomach does a little flip flop when I see Kyla in the kitchen with my mom.

I can only imagine how much anxiety Ashley must be feeling.

My mom smiles at both of us, "Hi, girls."

"Hey Mom," I reply. "Hey Kyla."

She has her back to us, but I hear Kyla quietly respond.

"Hi, Mrs C." Ashley finally speaks up and her voice is a tad shaky.

Aw!

I want to give her a big hug for encouragement but I don't.

After what seems like a really long pause, Ashley does what she should have done a long time ago. She acknowledges her sister, "Hi Kyla."

It's hard to know who she's surprised more.

My mom's mouth drops.

And Kyla's head whips around really fast.

An understandable reaction by both of them.

As for me, I can't stop myself from smiling.

This really is something that is long overdue.

"Uhm, uhm, hi," Kyla gets out eventually.

She seems unsure of what is up with Ashley.

I don't blame her.

Not one bit.

Ashley seems unsure of what to do next.

Kyla seems hesitant to push things.

And then the room gets quiet.

Like, awkward silence quiet.

It looks like I will have to speed this process up.

"Mom, do you think you can help me find something in the basement?" I ask, breaking the silence.

I'm fairly certain that I'm fooling no one with my request, but that doesn't matter.

It had to be done.

"Sure, absolutely, no problem," my mom says even though I can tell she's still surprised by the latest turn of events in the Davies sisters' family drama.

I make eye contact with Ashley to give her one final show of my support, and then I follow my mom out of the room.

I'm on such pins and needles!

Don't worry though, I won't be missing the show.

No way.

No how.

I'm way too invested to butt my nose out of things now.

My mom begins to ask me what is going on, but I don't answer her.

That explanation would take too much time.

Instead I put my finger to my lips to indicate that she should stop talking.

I pull her with me and we double back so both of us have a good view of the Davies girls.

My mom gives me a look, but I notice she makes no move not to eavesdrop on Ashley and Kyla.

Ha!

I knew she couldn't resist spying.

Like mother, like daughter!

Oh, this brings back such fond memories of another very important event that took place in this very kitchen. Except that event was between Ashley and my mom.

Aw!

Good times!

That's when my girl was welcomed officially into the family.

And now, I hope she's going to do the same thing for a certain girl who looks very on edge.

Ashley is fiddling with her fingers and staring at the floor like it's the most interesting thing since seeing me naked. "So, uhm, how are you?"

Really?

That's her opening?

Oh my god!

That sounds so dirty!

I'm not even trying and I can't help but make everything sound X rated.

Huh.

I'm way more talented than I thought!

Kyla is also avoiding making eye contact. "I'm ok thanks. How are..."

"I'm sorry!" Ashley blurts out and then she sighs.

Aw again!

I haven't seen unsure Ashley in such a long time.

I forgot how adorable she can be.

She mumbles something under her breath that I can't hear and then she finally looks directly at Kyla. "I owe you an apology."

Yay!

She's finally tackling the issue head on!

Go Ashley go!

I told you I'm her biggest cheerleader.

Kyla has been rendered speechless so Ashley continues. "I was so absolutely shocked when you showed up at my house, and the fact that you arrived with Christine didn't help matters."

No fucking kidding!

I'd still like five minutes alone with that woman to teach her a lesson she would never forget!

But that's really not anything I should be focusing on right now.

"I understand," Kyla says quietly.

Ashley shakes her head but she doesn't seem angry. "No, I really don't think you do." She sighs before continuing. "Growing up, I hardly ever saw my..." Ashley pauses and I'm not really sure why, "...our dad..."

Oh my god!

I can't believe what she just said!

What a huge step for Ashley!

I'm so proud!

I know how difficult that must have been for her!

She's a superstar in so many ways!

Kyla also seems taken aback but she lets Ashley keep going.

"He would appear and disappear all the time that eventually I got used to it." My heart aches for Ashley as she goes back in her past. "When he did show up though, it was like a whirlwind and we got to do a lot of cool things together. It didn't make things right but I know he tried the best he could."

Kyla nods along as her sister speaks. She's definitely giving Ashley her full attention.

"After he died, those memories were all I had left of a father I wish I'd known a lot better." Ashley's voice sounds emotional but she's showing so much strength. "Finding out I had a sister made me question everything I knew about him and our relationship."

I look back at my mom and she has tears in her eyes.

Aw!

What a softy!

Not like me though!

Nope.

I'm as hard as steel!

I'm only reaching for the Kleenex she's passing to me because it would be rude to turn it down.

Yup.

That's my story and I'm sticking with it.

"I thought having to share him with you would be like losing him all over again," Ashley explains. "I was so angry but it wasn't with you."

I can see relief written all over Kyla's face.

"I acted really badly towards you and you didn't deserve it," Ashley apologies sweetly. I love her so! "I'm really sorry, Kyla, and I hope you can forgive me."

Wow!

Ashley has exceeded all my expectations of what how I thought this would go.

And then some!

There's a reason why she's the most amazing person I know!

And soon I get to have hot, sweaty, sex with her!

Yeah I do!

"If you're willing to give me another chance, I'd really like the opportunity to get to know my baby sister," Ashley finishes adorably.

Kyla doesn't respond right away.

Uh oh.

What if she says no?

Oh my god!

That would be awful!

Ashley is looking expectantly at Kyla. I'm not breathing.

Just as I'm about to hit full panic mode, Kyla jumps up from her stool.

Oh my god!

What's going on?

She doesn't say anything though. Instead, Kyla rushes over to Ashley to give her a huge hug.

Aw!

I'm sorry I doubted you, future sister-in-law.

Ashley seems shocked by Kyla's reaction, but eventually she relaxes so she can return her embrace.

"You don't even have to ask about a second chance," Kyla gushes enthusiastically after she lets go of Ashley. "We're family!"

Oh god!

I need more Kleenex!

I can barely see I'm so teary eyed.

Ashley is beaming and it's the happiest I've seen her since this whole long lost sister episode started. "Yeah, I guess we are," she replies with a smile.

Kyla looks like a kid on Christmas morning.

Aw!

This is like something out of a made for TV movie.

And I'm hopeful that this is just one of many happy moments to come for Ashley and Kyla.

I think both of them need each other a lot.

"I wanted to give you something," Ashley declares and she's back to looking nervous.

Hmmmmm.

I'm intrigued.

I have no clue what my girl is up to.

She pulls an object out of her pocket and when I see what it is, I almost gasp.

I can't let Ashley know I'm spying though so I manage to keep quiet.

"This was our dad's favourite guitar pick," Ashley explains and I'm still flabbergasted. I can't believe she's going to give it away. "I really want you to have it."

I'm surprised as all hell!

That guitar pick means the world to Ashley.

It may not sound like much, but when she got it after he died, she said it made her feel connected to him.

And now she's giving it to Kyla!

Wow!

I'm in awe!

Ashley may take the long road at times, but when she realizes what she has to do, she does it completely.

"I can't take this," Kyla replies with a shake of her head. "It's yours."

Ashley places the guitar pick in her sister's hand. "It was mine and now it's yours. I'm sure he'd be happy that you get a chance to have it."

"Thanks," Kyla whispers as she closes her hand around the guitar pick. "I'll take really good care of it."

Is it possible to aw too much?

I hope not, because I can't stop myself.

Ashley and Kyla are adorable together!

Especially Ashley!

Not that I'm biased or anything.

Yeah right.

"There's one more thing," Ashley announces.

Another surprise?

Could she be any more amazing?

I really don't think she can.

"If you're ok with it, I was thinking maybe you could come and stay with me and Spencer for a while," Ashley suggests. "But don't feel any pressure to, I would understand if you're not comfortable."

"Are you sure?" Kyla asks. "I don't want to impose."

"You're family, right?" Ashley smiles at her sister. "Besides, I know Spencer is listening to this, and I know she wouldn't mind at all."

That's right!

I wouldn't!

I think it's a great idea and it will give...

Whoa.

Wait a second.

Did Ashley just say what I think she just said?

Oops!

I've so totally been busted!

I guess I'm not as sneaky as I thought.

I really need to be punished later.

I can't wait!

"I would love to," Kyla enthusiastically tells Ashley.

Awesome!

Everything has turned out so well!

I'm over the moon!

I'm thrilled!

I'm excited!

I'm...

Whoa again.

What was that?

Kyla is coming to stay with me and Ashley?

As in at our house?

The same house that I plan to ravish her in repeatedly tonight?

What in the world is Ashley thinking?

Maybe she can stay in the basement.

And then she can turn the music up really loud.

Oh my god!

Kyla really is evil!

I knew it!

Damn her!

Boo!

Hiss!

I'm so very, very, very, very, very sad!


	23. Chapter 23

**A/N** **Thanks a lot for your feedback, it was really nice hearing that there are still people who want to read this story. Here is another chapter, I hope you enjoy as well. Not sure when I will update again but I will try to make it so****on. And for the person who asked, yes that was definitely a Buffy reference last chapter. One of my favorite shows :)**_  
_

Chapter 23

My bad mood has lightened somewhat.

Don't get me wrong, I'm still trying to figure out a way to have loud, passionate amazing sex with Ashley even though her sister will be staying at our house.

I've actually thought of not much else over the last few minutes.

It's not my fault!

How can I be judged when it's been ages since I've been happy and naked with Ashley in many different positions?

If there's one thing I know about myself though, it's that I don't give up easily.

I think I proved that when I pursued my brunette hottie.

Sure, I wanted to give up, but I didn't.

And I will find a way for us to give each other lots and lots of orgasms tonight.

That I guarantee!

Yeah I do!

But in the short term, I'm basking in how Ashley really stepped up today.

She was awesome!

And sexy as fuck!

That's not unusual though.

It's not easy to set aside one's pride and do the right thing. She took a big step by inviting Kyla in her life and our home.

Our home!

Where we usually have lots and lots of amazing sex!

Sorry.

That was crude and selfish of me to mention.

Can I be blamed though for my reaction?

Yeah, that's what I thought.

Regardless, I didn't voice any of my concerns to Ashley when my mom and I finally came out of hiding. Instead I gave my woman a big hug and sweet kiss.

I would have stripped her of her clothes right then and there, but the last rational part I have left of my brain told me that would not be the right thing to do.

Stupid brain!

Ashley looks like this giant weight has been lifted off of her shoulders and Kyla looks like she's just won the lottery.

Well, I suppose, she does have twelve and a half million dollars at her disposal now.

Not too shabby.

But wait.

So do I!

I mean, we do!

Ashley and me, that is!

Oh my god!

Think of the wedding I can throw with that kind of money!

Oh my god!

I can start properly planning our wedding now!

Yay!

I don't have much time to waste!

I'm going to have to call Jessie so we can start on Operation Spashley Wedding!

She's going to be totally psyched!

At least I know I'll have sex on my wedding night.

Oh god!

I better not have to wait that long!

That would be a tragedy of epic proportions!

Plus I'd probably pass out from sexual frustration.

Ashley gives my forehead a kiss breaking me out of my thoughts.

Thankfully!

I can't be worrying about my lack of sexual fulfillment before my wedding or I'll get wrinkles.

"I love you," she says sweetly.

Aw!

She's the bestest!

"I love you too," I reply just as sweetly.

Kyla's gone to pack her stuff up and my mom is getting some food out of the refrigerator, giving us this brief moment to ourselves.

I love the feeling of being in Ashley's arms.

Even if it doesn't lead to naked time.

"Here you go," my mom says after she's gathered up a few items for us take back to our house. "Enjoy!"

Our house that will now have a teenage girl in it.

Oy vey!

I've heard they can be quite moody.

Or maybe, that was just me.

Ashley is smiling, "Thanks Mrs. C., you're the best."

"That's what they tell me," my mom teases but there's something in her eyes that worries me.

I can't quite read what is going on but I am concerned.

Ashley's family drama has taken up so much of my energy lately that I haven't had a lot of time left over for other things.

And I'm not just talking about sex.

Wow.

Even I'm amazed by my one track mind!

She doesn't really look all that sad, but there is definitely something up with her.

"You ok?" I ask as I move away from Ashley.

Not that I want to.

I just need this conversation to have my full attention.

"Of course I am," she insists but I don't really believe her. I give her a look to tell her exactly what I'm thinking. "Fine, ok, I guess I got used to have Kyla around. It was nice having someone at home to look after. I forgot what that was like."

Aw!

My mom is so cute!

Aw!

Hold up!

Maybe she can keep Kyla and I can have Ashley all to myself!

It's the perfect plan!

No!

No!

No!

Even I can recognize how self centered my line of thinking is.

But still, my mom looks like someone's taken away her puppy.

Oh my god!

That's it!

We can get her a cute puppy to take care of so she's not upset anymore about Kyla leaving.

Also, if she has a puppy to keep her occupied maybe she won't be so mad at my father.

What a great idea!

And I love dogs!

They are so fucking cute!

I'll make sure to come over tomorrow and share my plan with my mom.

I think it will really do her a lot of good.

Maybe she just has empty nest syndrome or something.

I hope that's it!

Looking for a puppy is going to be so much fun!

Just like planning my wedding is going to be!

I have so much stuff to look forward to now!

Not sex though.

Not the best sex of my life.

Where was I again?

Oh yeah, cheering my mom up.

I'll make lunch plans with her for tomorrow and then I'll spring my glorious idea on her.

Then I'll meet with Jessie to go over wedding plans.

Yay again!

These next few weeks and months are going to be so much fun!

Hey, planning the perfect wedding takes time!

It's going to be the perfect day!

And how could it not when I'm marrying the most amazing girl I know!

Aw!

I just made myself swoon!

Today has been a great today!

And tonight I'm going to make it even better!

Yeah I am!

I haven't given up on finding a way to do that!

Kyla comes bounding back into the kitchen and even though I'm a little ticked off with her for obvious reasons, I can't help but smile at her.

The excitement she's feeling is fairly obvious.

"I'm all packed!" She announces gleefully. She goes over to my mom to give her a big hug. "Thank you so much for letting me stay here. You have no idea how welcomed you made me feel."

Aw!

I thought I was done with those, but I'm not!

My mom smiles warmly at Kyla, "It was my pleasure, you can stay here any time."

Aw!

They're all turning me into such a mush ball!

What?

I'm not a softy!

Really, I'm not!

Whatever.

I feel a bit bad leaving my mom all alone, but soon enough she won't be. She'll be too busy training her new puppy to be upset.

And now that I have some free time on my hands, I can go kick my dad's ass for making my mom sad.

He's got some serious explaining to do!

You bet Ashley's sweet ass he does!

We say goodbye to my mom and after some awkwardness about who Kyla would ride home with, I ended up with that delightful task.

Stupid Kyla!

I'm still a little miffed at her!

I'm sorry, I can't help it.

Because of her, my sexless streak is going to continue with no end in sight.

Oh right.

I'm supposed to be Determined Spencer!

I forgot!

It wasn't my fault!

My brain isn't what it used to be because of all the time it's spent fantasizing about a certain brunette.

Maybe after Kyla's gone to sleep and if I promise to be super quiet, Ashley will sex me up.

And sex me down!

Down you know where!

Yeah baby, yeah!

If I don't get some soon my ability to have a thought that isn't related to sex will be a thing of the past.

What?

I don't think about sex that much!

No, really I don't.

In my defense, wouldn't you be obsessed with it as much as I am if you were the one that got to call Ashley yours?

That's what I thought.

Kyla doesn't say that much during the ride home and I'm thankful for that. If she knew what I was thinking about she'd run screaming from the car.

And as much as her presence is a bit of an annoyance, I really want her and Ashley to have the opportunity to get to know each other.

I swear, I'm like Mother Theresa!

Only younger.

And hotter!

And I would never, ever take a vow of celibacy.

Although it feels like I have.

Ashley arrived home before me which is surprising because I've been known to have a lead foot.

She smiles at the two of us when we get out of the Spencermobile, but I can tell she's still feeling anxious. That's understandable mind you because we're going to have a virtual stranger staying with us for god knows how long.

And a sex interfering stranger to boot!

Ok, ok, ok, I'll give the lack of sex talk a rest for a while.

We'll see how that lasts.

Being the good big sister that she soon will be, Ashley helps Kyla with her bag while the younger Davies carries her guitar.

Ashley is so gallant!

Things get a little weird when we enter our house but that's to be expected. I can tell Ashley is happy to have her sister here, and I can tell how over the moon Kyla is to finally have a chance to get to know her sister.

I tell Ashley to give Kyla a tour of our place. I think it's best for me to give them to time alone together, so I go upstairs to make sure the guest room is presentable.

Contrary to what I'd like to do, I can't shove Kyla in the basement.

Oh my god!

The guest bedroom that I wanted to set Kyla up in is full of my stuff that I was supposed to find a place for months ago.

Damn me and my procrastinating ways!

I should have known that would come back to bite me in the ass!

And not in the good Ashley biting kind of way!

Boo!

Hiss!

I suck!

Now I have to set Kyla up in the room that's right next to mine and Ashley's room.

It serves me right!

Now there's no way I can convince Ashley to get it on with me, when her sister is so close to us.

Hold up!

Wait a second!

Hold the presses!

What if Ashley and I go to the basement and turn the TV up really loud?

Oh my god!

Why didn't I think of that before?

We can have hot, steamy sex all the while Kyla is none the wiser because she'll be upstairs sleeping the night away.

I'm a genius!

An absolute genius!

Now I can finally be one hundred percent happy to have a new addition to the family!

Woo hoo!

Oh, right, and did I mention I'll get to have my itch scratched later?

No, not a real itch!

Ew!

That was just a metaphor.

Or was that an analogy?

Who cares!

I'll be having sex later!

That's all that matters.

I set up Kyla's room feeling much better about everything. When Ashley and Kyla come upstairs they both seem more at ease and that makes me super happy.

Kyla says she's tired and is going to turn in.

Yay!

I mean, I'll support her if that's what she wants.

She gives both of us a hug goodnight and I have to fight really hard to contain my excitement.

But I'm being well-behaved Spencer now and I do bang up job of not appearing too eager for Kyla to go night night.

Ashley heads into our room after we're done with Kyla.

I want to drag her downstairs immediately, but I don't.

I follow her instead and once our door is closed I give her well deserved kiss. "I'm so proud of you, Ash."

Ashley shakes her head, "I only did what was right." She smiles at me and then she places her arms around my neck. "And I have you to thank for giving me a well deserved kick in the ass."

I hope I didn't hurt her when I did that.

I better kiss it better!

Patience Spencer, patience.

"Just doing my job," I reply coolly. "Although I don't remember ordering a teenager when I told you to get to know your sister."

Ashley chuckles and she's so sexy I nearly forget my seduce her downstairs plan. "Yeah about that, I hope you don't mind but it just felt right."

"No need to apologize," I assure her, "But next time we bring home a kid I think we should discuss it first."

"Duly noted," Ashley says with a big smile on her face.

And then she does something awful.

Truly and utterly awful.

She yawns.

More than once!

No!

No!

No!

That can't be good.

At all.

"Sorry, I guess all this emotional stuff has taken a lot out of me," Ashley tells me before she yawns again.

Sigh.

Big sigh.

Giant sigh.

"No need to apologize," I assure my gorgeous fiancé. I deserve a medal for what I'm about to say. "How about we get into bed and I'll give you a big dose of Spencer cuddles to help you unwind."

Spencer cuddles!

Boo!

Hiss!

But it's the right thing to do.

Ashley has been through an emotional period and I'll give her a day to recover.

After that though, she's all mine.

"That sounds like an amazing plan," Ashley replies and then I get a soft kiss on my forehead. "You really are the best."

You know what, I really have to agree with that.

Especially because I'm voluntarily going another night without any.

Saint Spencer.

That's exactly what I am.

* * *

I was having the most amazing dream!

Any guesses what it was about?

If you guessed world peace you'd be one hundred percent wrong.

That's ok, today I'm going to make my wonderful dream a reality.

I'm going to send Kyla out to get some milk and once she's gone, Ashley will be all mine.

Did I mention that the milk store is located very far away?

Go me!

I'm basking in my brilliance when I hear Ashley's raised voice.

Oh no!

I'm still in bed by the way.

Ashley got up early to make Kyla breakfast but I was too tired to get up when she did.

But that might have been a big mistake.

Because now it seems like the two of them are fighting and I don't know what to do.

I really hoped they could go a little while before their first argument.

Boo!

Hiss!

I'm sad!

And still very sexually frustrated!

Instead of focusing on that though, I rush to put on something decent so I can go stop World War III.

Ashley's voice has gotten even louder over last few minutes and I hope I can stop her from ruining all the progress she made yesterday.

I have a feeling this isn't going to end well.

I fly down the stairs without falling.

Go me again!

I make it to the kitchen just in time to see Ashley and Kyla doubled over in laughter.

Huh?

That doesn't seem right.

I'm so perplexed.

"What's going on?" I ask when I catch my breath.

Ashley and Kyla immediately stop laughing, but I can tell they're struggling to keep their composure.

"Morning, Spence!" Ashley guiltily greets me. "I hope we didn't wake you." She walks over to give me a good morning kiss but I'm eying her suspiciously.

That girl has got an "oh shit' look all over her stunning face.

On the plus side, it looks like her and Kyla are getting along.

Yay!

I suppose.

I poke Ashley a couple of times because I know she's about to be in big trouble. "What have you done?" She tries to act all innocent, but I'm on to her. "It's better you tell me know before you're in really big trouble."

"I haven't done anything!" Ashley exclaims loudly.

I quirk my eye brow at her and that's her undoing.

"Ok, ok, I was sort of telling Kyla about the first day we met," she finally confesses.

Aw!

Why would I get mad at that?

How sweet that Ashley wants to tell her sister about that wonderful, life-changing day.

So very, very sw...

Whoa.

Wait a second.

"Exactly how much did you tell her?" I ask Ashley with a lot of trepidation.

Ashley shrugs and even though she looks so damn cute that isn't an answer.

That's when Kyla bursts out laughing.

And I hear the words _Hollaback Girl_ come out of her mouth.

Ashley Davies, you are in so much trouble!

"I love you!" Ashley says to get out of the dog house.

That isn't going to work!

Not one bit.

But then she gives me those puppy dog eyes of hers and I know I can't stay mad at her.

Because I know when she told Kyla that story she did it out of love and not to humiliate me.

Still, that doesn't mean I won't make her pay.

She will have to get on her knees to have me forgive her.

And not to beg!

Oh!

Yeah!


	24. Chapter 24

**A/N - Thanks as always to those who leave me feedback, it is appreciated.**

Chapter 24

Apparently Ashley's slip of the tongue doesn't allow me to punish her.

How unfair!

I protested that unfairness when Kyla left the kitchen to use the bathroom.

Well, truthfully, I wanted to do something else with our alone time, but, considering we didn't have hours to spare, I decided to go another route.

That route: a guilt trip.

I attempted to make Ashley feel bad for sharing with Kyla the embarrassing tale of our first night together.

It doesn't matter that I got the girl in the end. That night is still cringe worthy.

My attempt fell flat for two reasons.

Reason number one: Ashley pouted and told me that she was just sharing with Kyla what happened on what would turn out to be a night that changed her life.

For the better.

Aw!

What a sweetie!

I love Ashley so much!

Even if she's being a bit of a meanie head.

Reason number two: it would seem Ms. Davies hasn't forgotten about a certain slip of the tongue I had some weeks back.

And not the good kind!

I tried to protest that our collective slips of the tongue should put us on even ground, but my girl disagreed.

She stated that hers was with the intention of showing Kyla why she fell in love with me.

Aw!

She really does warm the cockles of my heart!

Ew!

That's just a figure of speech!

I love Ashley's lady parts!

Now, I'm not adverse to some added on parts from time to time, but that's not what I was referring to.

Anyway, getting back on topic...

Mine was a deeply guarded secret that was never supposed to see the light of day. Plus, she now has to endure emails and/or text messages from various members of my family on occasion that have a Mrs. Brady reference in it.

Stupid family!

They are digging an even deeper hole for me to get myself out of!

You know one hole that I would never want to get myself out of?

Any guesses?

God, I really need to get laid.

Seriously.

I'm even annoying myself with all this sex talk.

I never thought I'd see the day!

So, as I was saying, Ashley is not in the doghouse but apparently I still am.

I want a new judge!

I mean, it's not like she holds the Brady Bunch incident over my head every day but I really thought that she'd forgotten about it.

No such luck it would seem.

Boo!

Hiss!

I'm sad!

And incredibly frustrated!

What?

I can't help myself, ok!

Kyla strolls back into the kitchen humming "Hollaback" Girl like she's so damn funny.

Well, she's not!

"I always wondered why that song had such a special meaning to you guys," Kyla remarks before taking a bite out of an apple.

I see her and Ashley exchange a look. Both of them are struggling not to laugh.

You know, if I wasn't so horny and peeved I might be happy that Ashley and Kyla are sharing a sisterly moment.

I might even remark that it was rather cute.

I might.

But I won't.

I was wrong, by the way.

Ashley isn't a meanie head, they both are!

Those two are lucky I'm such a peaceful and loving person, or I'd consider opening up a can of whoop ass on them.

Why do I suddenly hear laughter in my head?

"Do you have any bananas?" Kyla asks innocently, but we all know that's not the case. "I suddenly have a craving for one."

Ew!

I never crave bananas!

I'm so not a fan!

"Hardy, har har," I deadpan. "As much as I'm enjoying this trip down memory lane, I have places to go and people to see."

That's actually not a lie.

I know I was supposed to drop by my mom's today, but seeing as I've had a trying time of late, I've decided to make plans with Jessie instead.

She's working, but I know she will be more than happy to take a little break and have lunch with me.

I'm psychic like that.

Besides, I'm guessing that Ashley and her annoying little sister probably have something planned already.

Not that I'm jealous.

Honest!

For reals, yo!

I want them to bond. Otherwise having "Kyla, the sex blocker" stay at our house will be for naught.

Even if Ashley wanted me by her side today to act as a buffer, I'd tell her no.

And not because she shared our first date story with Kyla.

Although, I still believe she deserves some form of punishment for that.

I'm going to appeal my case!

No, the reason why I'm leaving Ashley and Kyla alone, is really for their own benefit. The two of them need to spend time together. Without me, or anyone else around.

Even if that means a continued sexless life for me.

I'm such a martyr!

But for a good cause.

I text Jessie with my lunch idea and seconds later she responds saying she'd love to see me.

Aw!

Jessie, how I've missed thee!

Such a loyal friend is she!

I didn't even intend that to rhyme!

Go moi!

Maybe I'll write Ashley a poem for our wedding!

What a wonderful idea!

I wonder what I can get to rhyme with blonde bombshell?

I'm about to get into the shower when Ashley comes into our room looking worried.

Oh no!

I wonder what's wrong?

"What's wrong?" I ask before I turn hysterical.

Ashley steps right in front of me and that makes my feelings of anxiety turn into feelings of another kind.

Have I mentioned lately how much I love her abs?

Because I fucking do!

I love when she wears shirts that expose her midriff.

Mmmmmm.

"Did I upset you?" Ashley asks back.

Aw!

She looks so cute right now!

And mother-fucking hot as hell!

Just saying.

"No, should I be upset?" I continue the streak of answering every question with another question.

I'm so confused.

"I wasn't making fun of you when I was telling Kyla that story," Ashley says, looking incredibly earnest. "I really was just explaining about how adorable you were that night and how I felt myself already falling for you and how sexy you were. Although I was just thinking that part in my head because you know I was talking to my sister and that would be weird and..."

I cut Ashley's adorable rant off with a sweet, yet chaste, kiss.

Unfortunately, we cannot go further than a brief lip lock.

I reluctantly pull away and then I flash Ashley a smile. "I know you didn't set out to embarrass me. I'm not upset or mad at you."

Ok, that's not exactly the truth, but I was more being dramatic than anything else before.

Not to mention I could never stay mad at Ashley for long.

It's just not possible!

Ashley still doesn't seem convinced. "I was worried that you thought I was making fun of you behind your back and I would never, ever do that." She's got such an intense expression on her stunning face. "Ever."

Aw!

My poor girl!

She got all worked up over nothing!

Just like I normally do.

Twinsies!

"Ash," I start making sure my voice is soft so she realizes how I'm really feeling, "I know you well enough to know you'd never hurt me like that." I trust her completely! "So, please, don't worry that you did anything wrong."

"You sure?" Ashley asks. I nod my head in response. She breathes a deep sigh of relief. "I love you so much, Spence."

Aw!

My heart flutters every time she says that to me!

"I love you too," I reply before I give Ashley another kiss. "But just in case you still feel bad about telling Kyla that story, you can call it even and not hold a grudge over the whole Florence Henderson incident."

What?

I don't think that's an unreasonable request.

Ashley chuckles but I do get a kiss for my efforts. "Nice try, Spence. Nice try."

Oh well.

It was worth a shot.

I try to tilt my head to see if that will work but Ashley is having none of it.

How can she resist me?

Have I lost my appeal already?

No, that can't be it.

I sulk but, again, it has no affect on my love.

I let her know about my lunch plans with Jessie and she tells me about her plans to take Kyla around L.A. for some sightseeing.

I allow Ashley to go back downstairs but not before I get another kiss and a promise not to go to Disneyland without me.

That would be too much fun to miss!

* * *

I have to admit, I'm really excited.

No, not that kind of excited, but that's only because I took a really cold shower this morning.

I meant more for my wedding.

My wedding to Ashley!

My wedding to Ashley that I've been thinking about since forever!

Squeeeeeeeee!

I can't believe I can actually start planning it now!

Squeeeeeeeee!

It's going to be the most spectacular wedding ever!

Squeeeeeeeee!

I'm going to have to pace myself or I'll pass out before the wedding even gets here.

Squeeeeeeeee!

What?

I tried!

"What's cooking, good looking?"

I glance up to find Jessie smirking at me.

"If that's the best line you've got, then you better thank your lucky stars that you have Melissa or you'd be in big trouble," I tease.

And not the sexual kind of teasing!

That's reserved for only one woman.

Jessie rolls her eyes. "Whatever, Carlin. I was just trying to be nice."

Instead of bantering with my bestie, I get up from the table and give her a big hug.

It's been far too long since there's been any Jessie and Spencer time.

Far too long!

I'm about to ask my friend how her day is going when I notice she's looking incredibly guilty.

Oh no!

What did she do?

I can't handle any more drama right now!

I eye Jessie suspiciously. "What did you do?"

"Me?" She answers too loudly. "What makes you think I did anything?" I continue to stare at Jessie until she breaks. "Fine. Damn, you know me too well."

I win!

Yay!

But also, I don't have a good feeling about this.

"He showed up at my office looking so pathetic and sad that when I told him I had lunch plans with you I couldn't help myself and I invited him to come too," Jessie explains, but I still don't really understand what she's talking about. "You Carlins are impossible to say no to."

Huh?

I don't get it.

And that's when I finally look past Jessie and see who's standing behind her.

Glen.

Oh my!

If you were to look up the words remorseful, apologetic and ashamed in the dictionary, you'd probably see his face there.

Aw!

My poor brother!

I know he's a big jerk who did something completely unforgivable.

But he's still my brother.

And I will always love him.

"Hey," he says with a shrug of his shoulders. "If you don't want me here, I can go."

Aw!

He's really making my heart ache for him.

He seems so unkempt!

I don't think he's shaved in over a week. Glen is normally the epitome of well groomed.

"Come here, you moron," I say before I embrace my brother.

I've hated not talking with him.

Even though he can be a drama queen and I really hate how he's hurt Aiden, he's still a good person and someone I know has my back.

"As touching as this family reunion is, I'm starved," Jessie jokes in an attempt to lighten the mood.

"Yeah, you always were the pig of the group," I joke back. It earns me a light slap upside the head from my friend. 'What? It's true."

Glen lets out a laugh, but I can tell he's still a bit on the sad side. "Yeah, she's got you there Jessie. Remember that time Spencer and I fell asleep during that _Dawson's Creek_ marathon and when we woke up you had polished off like a whole chocolate cake?"

What?

Don't judge.

Katie Holmes was a hottie before she met Tom Cruise and turned into a Stepford Wife.

"First of all, you asshole, it was half a cake." Jessie then continues her reign of violence by swatting at Glen's arm. "And second of all, shut up!"

I roll my eyes at Glen and actually get a genuine smile from him in return.

Aw!

I've missed us!

The Three Musketeers!

All for one, and manis and pedis for all!

That was our motto.

The three of us sit down at our table and I can't wipe the grin off my face.

That is until Glen gets all solemn again.

Sigh.

My good mood and streak of luck might be running out.

"I saw Aiden last night," he tells us, and I don't think Jessie knew about that because she seems as shocked as I do. "He finally agreed to come over and talk."

Wow.

I didn't even know Glen was trying to communicate with Aiden.

What else have I missed over the last number of weeks?

"I'm guessing it didn't go well?" Jessie observes because Glen looks like crap.

He nods his head sadly.

The waiter decides to make an appearance but we ask him to come back later because this is much more important.

"I told him about..." Glen's voice trails off and he doesn't need to finish his sentence anyway. I think Jessie and I have a really good idea what he's referring to.

I wonder if Ashley knows about this yet?

I'm sure she would have mentioned something this morning to me.

I try not to talk about Glen and Aiden around Ashley anyways. I've learned my lesson.

Still, this is huge.

"You should have seen his face," Glen continues, his voice cracking. "He looked fucking devastated."

No shit, Sherlock.

You betrayed him in the worst way.

I won't say anything, though, to make Glen feel worse. He looks like he's doing a good enough job of that on his own.

"I'm such a fuck up," he declares before he starts to cry. "He's never going to forgive me. Not that I blame him, but..."

Once again, Glen's voice falters and that makes me feel really sorry for him.

Look, I'm not making any excuses for my brother.

I know what it's like to be cheated on and that's not anything I would wish on even my worst enemy.

But he's human and we all make mistakes.

He's messed things up so badly and I don't even know if there's a chance for him to get back what he lost.

He doesn't need to hear that.

Or any judgment from me.

He needs a friend, a sister and that's what I will be to him.

Plus, he has Jessie.

Glen is in a lot of pain and even if he brought it on himself, that doesn't mean he deserves to go through this alone.

"I'm sorry." I put my hand over Glen's and Jessie does the same thing with his other hand. "Maybe with time..."

"No!" Glen replies forcefully. He moves his hands from under ours and then he wipes any remaining tears from his face. "It's over, Spence. Aiden told me as much last night and the sooner I accept that, the better."

The three of us know that's bullshit.

Glen is nowhere close to accepting anything right now.

Sigh.

It looks like I will have to wait another day to start my wedding plans.

That's what sisters are for though.

"I have lots of ice cream at home, an empty house and the last season of _Top Model _cued up on Netflix. You interested?" I ask.

He nods his head and I don't have to check with Jessie to know she's on board.

I hope Ashley and I are stocked up on Kleenex.

Because something tells me that we're going to need a whole bunch this afternoon.

I would have loved to be talking about the wedding today, but that's doesn't appear to be on the agenda anymore.

Oh well.

There's always tomorrow.

Someone once told me it's only a day away.


	25. Chapter 25

Chapter 25

My lesbian goddess who art in heaven.

Ellen, be thy name.

I want to come.

And have lots of fun.

The number of orgasms I'm aiming to have...eleven.

Amen!

Can I also get a hallelujah!

That's right, my dry spell is still in tact.

Score!

Well, that's a bit of misnomer, isn't it.

Because I'm not scoring at all.

At all!

I had a great time with Jessie and Glen yesterday, even though my brother was a bit of a Debbie Downer.

Totally understandable though.

So, in order to cheer Glen up, we decided to turn our _Top Model _marathon into a margarita party.

Ole!

That was my idea!

I'm so brill!

Jessie and Glen returned to work first to get a few things tied up and then they came over for our fiesta.

I may have started the party a wee bit early, however.

In my defense, I had to ensure that the margaritas were perfection and that involved some taste-testing ahead of time.

That's my story and I'm sticking to it!

Needless to say, when my two partners in crime showed up, I was a tad buzzed.

And hour into our get together I was totally wasted.

But I had such a blast!

At one point, we decided to make Glen over and that resulted in Jessie and I dipping into my makeup so we could give my brother a new look.

And what a look it was!

Tee hee!

Glen was sort of pissed when he woke up but he really was a good sport about the whole thing.

Plus, he looked awesome!

Actually he didn't really. My brother is one ugly girl.

Then the three of us decided to have an impromptu dance competition.

I totally won, by the way!

I did!

Well, in my mind I did.

And that's of course when Ashley decided to come home.

She walked in with Kyla to find the three of us drunk out of our minds, dancing and Glen looking like such a diva.

We were quite a sight to behold.

Ashley and Kyla managed to get Jessie and Glen in cabs because obviously they couldn't drive themselves home.

Meanwhile, I formed the most amazing idea in my head.

I rushed upstairs, stripped and waited for Ashley spread eagle on our bed.

I knew there was no way she could resist me like that.

It was a perfect plan.

Except for one thing.

No, Kyla did not find me.

Thank God!

But I did happen to pass out waiting for my girl.

So, she walked in our bedroom to find me stark naked and completely out of it.

Stupid me!

I'm almost positive that if I had been awake we would have ended our sexless streak.

I'm never drinking again!

Never!

Ever!

Yeah, right.

Even I know that's a lie.

Thankfully I did not wake up with a hangover this morning but I did wake up just as sex deprived as I was yesterday.

And the day before.

And the day before that.

Sigh.

Ashley and her shadow have plans again today so that leaves me all by lonesome.

What else is new!

Sniff.

Actually, I was invited along with them but politely declined.

I so deserve some sort of medal when Ashley is done with her sister bonding time.

"Where you waiting long?" my mom asks as she sits down across from me.

I made lunch plans with her today.

I was going to go to her place but I figure she could use some pampering. So after lunch, we're heading to get massages and facials.

My treat.

I'm such a good daughter!

As as side note, I could get really used to this life of leisure.

It's awesome!

"Not at all," I lie. She seems kind of stressed out and I want this day for her to be about relaxation. "Everything ok?"

My mom nods but there's something about her smile that seems forced. "How are things with Ashley and Kyla?"

Awful!

Kyla's a pussy blocker!

A big one!

Of course, I'm not going to tell my mom that.

"Really well," I reply sincerely. Besides the obvious frustration I'm feeling, the two of them are getting on famously. "I hope you aren't missing her company too much."

Smooth segue, Carlin.

Real smooth.

Because I'm about to bring up the real reason for our day together.

"I know things with you and Dad have been kind of tense lately," I continue oh-so casually. "And I know that having Kyla there was nice for you."

In the brief moments when I'm not cursing Kyla for being born, I have had the chance to talk to her a little bit about what's happening with my parents.

I can tell she was trying to be diplomatic but there is definitely something awry with those two.

My mom attempts to put on a poker face, but I can see through it.

Poker!

I hardly even know her.

Sorry.

So not the time.

"I have no idea what you're talking about," my mom replies, even though she so does. "Your dad and I are fine."

Whatever.

She's not fooling me!

"Mom," I start in my serious voice, "You can talk to me about what's going on. Maybe I can help."

Oh my God!

What if there's a third party involved in this situation?

Oh my God!

That would be awful.

Especially considering my parents never have sex!

Ew!

I've gone to a very bad place.

I picture Ashley naked to make me go back to happier thoughts.

I'm lucky I still remember what she looks like sans clothes.

Back to the more important and pressing topic.

As I was thinking, there better not be a third party involved in all of this! I would like to give my parents the benefit of the doubt so that's what I'm going to do.

"There's nothing to talk about," my mom says while avoiding eye contact with me. "We're fine."

Yeah right, and I'm straight!

Oh my God!

I would never want to be straight.

That would deprive me of sex with Ashley!

That would be awful!

Although, I'm not really getting sex with Ashley now.

I'm a born-again virgin!

"I'm not a little kid anymore," I tell my mom. "You don't have to protect me."

I could really use a drink, my mom is stressing me out so much!

Not to worry!

I know that's the solution to this problem.

I'll let the subject drop for the time being because I want to my mom to enjoy her spa day, but that doesn't mean I'm letting this go.

One way or another I will get to the bottom of this mystery!

Ashley has a really nice bottom!

I'm so hopeless.

And I wouldn't have it any other way!

* * *

Wow.

I am so relaxed.

I haven't felt this stress-free in forever.

I had a great time with my mom today even if I'm no closer to helping her and my dad.

That's ok, I have tons of time on my hands right now to get those crazy kids on the same page again.

Super Spence to the rescue!

Did I mention how relaxed I am?

Mmmmmmmm.

Maybe I have time to squeeze in a nap before dinner.

I unlock the front door and I'm barely inside before an angry looking Ashley greets me.

"Where the fuck have you been?" she barks.

Uhm.

Ok.

I have no clue what's going on.

I'm so confused!

"Uhm, I was with..." I start but I don't get the chance to finish my sentence.

"No, seriously, where the fuck you have you been?" She's making her way over to me and I have to admit, I'm a tiny bit scared. "I've been trying to reach you for over an hour."

An hour?

What the fuck is going on?

I pull my Blackberry out of my purse before Ashley starts yelling again.

Oops!

I had my phone on vibrate!

Silly me!

I bet Ashley is going to have such a laugh when I tell her the truth.

Or, you know, tear my head off.

I'm not really worried that something is seriously wrong because I don't think Ashley would be so mad at me if that was the case.

Still, she is acting really out of character for her.

"I'm sorry," I say with a smile and head tilt, "I must have accidentally turned the ringer off and..."

Ashley is now right in front of me but she still looks super pissed. "Turned the fucking ringer off? And that's somehow going to make things better? What the fuck, Spence?"

Uhm.

Ok.

Did my woman have a personality transplant or something?

"I'm sorry," I squeak out because I have no clue what else to say.

"Sorry?" Ashley repeats a lot louder than I said it. "Sorry? Do you think that's going to make everything ok?"

What in the blue hell is going on?

I'd laugh if I wasn't so terrified that Ashley has gone off her rocker.

I didn't do anything wrong!

I'm an innocent!

All of sudden Ashley moves right in front of me and her hands go on either side of my head.

I'm sure my eyes are bugged out in fear.

Maybe I'm dreaming?

"I managed to get Aiden to take Kyla out for a few hours," Ashley begins with gritted teeth, "so you and I could have a few hours to ourselves and you pull a fucking disappearing act on me. Do you have any fucking idea how frustrated I am right now?"

Aw!

Ashley has missed me!

What a sweetie!

Still, I can't believe she's so angry at me for not answering my phone. Honestly, the temper on that girl is...

Whoa!

Whoa!

Whoa!

What did she say?

What the fucking hell did she just say?

Oh my god!

My stupid fucking phone!

It nearly ruined Ashley's amazing, stupendous, genius, wonderful plan!

Yes!

Yes!

Yes!

I knew today was going to be the best day ever when I woke up!

I had a such a good feeling!

"Was there anything specific you wanted to do with our alone time?" I ask coyly.

Oh!

Yeah!

I smirk at my brunette hottie because I'm that damn good.

Tee hee.

Ashley doesn't respond with words, instead she lets out the sexiest fucking growl in the history of the world.

And I nearly orgasm on the spot.

That's how ready I am.

So fucking ready.

Oh, I'm sorry, is my potty mouth offensive?

Well, too fucking bad!

Because in about two seconds it's about to be put to use in the best of ways.

Fuck yeah it is!

My lips barely touch Ashley's when our front door swings open and in walks Aiden and Kyla.

No!

No!

No!

What the fuckity fuck!

Why are they back already?

Who gave them a fucking key?

And what did I do to deserve the worst luck in the world?

Look at stupid Kyla smiling at me like she's not the most evil person ever!

Fuck!

I hate her!

Gah!

I'm really losing control!

But not in the right way!

I chance a glance at Ashley and she looks as ticked off as I feel.

"Did we come at a bad time?" Aiden asks with an incredibly amused look on his dumb face.

You think?

Asshole!

Oh Aiden, you are so lucky that I still feel bad about my brother breaking your heart or I'd inflict some serious bodily harm on you right now.

Ashley takes a few steps back from me and I nearly cry out in disappointment.

One minute I was flying so high.

And the next minute I was crashing into the ground.

Fuck!

"We could come back later," Kyla suggests.

What an amazing idea!

Such an amazing idea I could kiss her!

Not literally!

My kisses are saved for only one woman!

"No, that's ok," Ashley replies for some unknown reason.

What the fuck?

Now I'm the one who's angry!

I look over at Ashley and I can tell she wanted to say the opposite but feels it would be rude to basically kick Aiden and Kyla out for sex.

It so wouldn't!

Ok, ok, ok. I can maybe see her point if I wasn't so devastated to have something I've wanted for so long cruelly taken away from me.

"Did you guys have a good afternoon?" Ashley asks as all of us head to the kitchen.

By the way, I have no idea when Aiden and Kyla bonded enough for them to go out alone together.

I will have to ask Ashley about that later.

After we've fornicated for hours on end.

"Oh my God!" Aiden squeals with a clap of his hands. "You have to hear Kyla sing, she's amazing."

Really?

I had this feeling she'd be really awful or something.

Not sure why, just a feeling.

Ashley arches her eyebrow at Aiden in that sexy way she does that makes me want to rip all her clothes off. "You think Kyla sings better than me?"

I know she's only teasing.

For the most part.

Kyla seems to be embarrassed because they're talking about her like she's not in the room.

I might have sympathy for her if I didn't hate her so much.

What?

"No, you dumbass, I don't," Aiden assures his friend. "Don't be such an insecure idiot."

Normally I'd find their bantering kind of cute.

But my thoughts are way to dirty to really focus on anything else.

"How come you sang for Aiden when you still haven't sung for me?" Ashely asks her sister before she takes a bit of an apple.

Fuck!

That's so sexy!

I really need to crank the air conditioning because I'm so hot!

"It wasn't like that," Kyla assures Ashley. "I just started singing along to a song on the radio and for some reason Aiden started freaking out."

"I did not freak out!" Aiden protests. He's not very convincing though because he starts clapping his hands again in that oh-so-gay way that my brother loved.

Speaking of Glen, Aiden doesn't seem all that affected by their conversation from the other night.

Hmmmmmm.

I'll have to ask Ashley about that later as well.

Ashley gets up and I don't know where she's going.

I'd follow her but I'm almost positive I'd do naughty things to her that shouldn't be done when we have company over.

Stupid company!

Aiden tells me about his afternoon with Kyla without realizing I don't really care.

What?

Ok, ok, ok. I do sort of care but not today.

Not today!

Not when I missed out on sexy time with Ashley!

It's going to take me ages to get over my missed opportunity.

Ages!

Ashley returns with Kyla's guitar case.

She's not really giving her sister much choice in regards to putting on a concert for us, is she?

Kyla looks visibly nervous.

"I'm not really used to playing in front of people," she confesses.

Didn't she move out here to have a music career?

Not really the best idea if you have stage freight, Einstein!

Wow, I am such a bitch!

Lucky for me nobody knows what I'm thinking, or I'd be in big trouble.

"We're not people, we're family," Ashley says stubbornly.

Aw!

How cute is she!

And might I add, she's a very bossy older sister!

I do enjoy her bossy side.

Fuck yeah I do!

Kyla smiles and it's clear that she was touched by Ashley's words.

The three of us give Kyla our full attention as we wait for the show to begin.

I pull my chair up beside Ashley and then I put my hand in hers.

Even if I can't have what I really want right now, I can be close with my girl.

She gives a really warm smile and then she gives my hand a squeeze.

Aw!

I love how she doesn't show any visible signs of being jealous of Kyla.

That's an improvement!

I sort of forget what we're doing and begin to eye fuck Ashley.

I can't help myself!

I have no control when it comes to her.

Kyla, of course, chooses that moment to start playing her song.

Awesome timing as per usual, Ms Woods!

That girl is really starting to work my last nerve!

It takes a few seconds for her to actually start singing and when she does, I understand why Aiden freaked out when he her sing.

The girl has some serious talent.

Obviously not as much as Ashley, but there's no doubting that she takes after her father.

She has a completely different sound than Ashley and her style is a lot more mellow than Ashley's rock style.

But she's good.

Really good.

And it's clear that Ashley feels the same way.

That is until she gets up in the middle of Kyla's performance

Uhm.

Ok.

What's up with her now?

"I'll be right back," she announces rather cryptically. Luckily, Ashley decides to explain herself fully before she leaves so as not to induce panic in a certain blonde who shall remain nameless. "I have to call Stan right now."

Oh, I see.

Aw!

How amazing is she?

"Who's Stan?" Kyla asks in confusion.

"Ash's record producer," Aiden tells her before I get a chance to.

Kyla still seems lost.

"It's safe to say you'll be getting a shot at a record deal sooner than you thought," I explain as I give Kyla a sincere smile.

I really do like her on some level.

I just need to have sex first before I can fully appreciate Kyla.

Ok, that sounds a lot weirder than I meant it to.

Kyla doesn't appear to be at all happy at that news. "No, I don't want it like this."

Say what?

I'm really close to blurting out something I'll regret later.

"I don't want a shot because I'm Ashley's sister," Kyla clarifies, "I want to do this on my own."

Oh.

I guess that makes some sense.

Still, she shouldn't kick a gift horse in the mouth.

Wait.

I don't think that's right.

Oh well.

"Nobody is going to give you a recording contract because you're related to someone famous," I tell Kyla even though that's not a hundred percent true. "Let me offer you some free career advice, take any opportunity that comes your way because you never know when you'll get another one."

I can tell Kyla is skeptical.

"Stan isn't going to do anything unless he thinks you're marketable," I explain. Sounds cold, but it's true. He's doesn't run a charity. "Ashley wouldn't do this for you unless she thought you had talent."

I've still got skills!

Because I think I said exactly the right thing to Kyla.

Go me!

I haven't lost my touch when it comes to closing a deal.

Now if I can close a deal with Ashley later, I'll be even happier.

A few minutes later, Ashley returns to the kitchen looking like the conversation with Stan went the complete opposite of good.

Uh oh.

Poor Kyla!

Her expectations were lifted and now they'll be crushed.

That's got to suck!

"What happened?" I ask even though I already know the answer.

"He wants Kyla to sing for him right away," Ashley responds, albeit with some reluctance.

Why does she look like that's bad news?

"But he's on the way to New York tonight and he wants Kyla and me to go with him." She finishes without making eye contact.

That has to be the worst news ever!

Fuck my life!

Fuck it all to hell!


	26. Chapter 26

**A/N - Go me keeping my News Years resolution so far! Not sure when I will be able to update again but as of next week I will no longer be gainfully employed so I shouldn't keep you waiting too long. Thanks as always to anyone who leaves me feedback, I do appreciate it**

Chapter 26

Three days.

Three fucking days.

That's how long Ashley's been in New York.

Without me!

I can't even.

I'm at the end of my rope.

I don't know how much longer I can go on.

I really, really don't know.

And the worst part?

Ashley doesn't come back until tomorrow!

That's over 24 hours away!

Apparently things with Kyla went really well and Stan is very excited about the possibility of making music with her.

Ew!

That sounds dirty!

I meant that in a platonic way!

He had her meet with a whole bunch of people and then Ashley ended up doing a couple of impromptu shows as a favor to Stan. That's why I've been deprived of my girl for so long.

So fucking long!

And it's not like I even had a chance to do anything with Ashley before they left.

Stupid Stan, with his stupid private jet, ensured that Ashley and Kyla flew out of L.A. that night, thus, extending the longest dry spell in history.

Ashley's been pretty good though.

She texts me all the time and we talk every night before I go to sleep.

It's not the same though.

Not even close.

We couldn't even do sexy talk because it would be too much for me.

I've saved myself this long that the only way I'm going over the edge is with Ashley.

With her fingers.

And her tongue.

Mmmmmmmm.

And then I'm locking her in our room for days.

Weeks even!

It's going to be glorious!

An event like no other.

In my haze of obsession with Ashley sex, or lack thereof, I have managed to spend some time with my brother and do some preliminary wedding planning with Jessie.

I'm so productive!

I even managed to get in a ten-mile run this morning to help with all the tension I'm feeling.

Or, you know, I slept until noon and had sex dreams about Ashley.

It's almost the same thing!

When I did haul my ass out of bed, I decided to use my last Ashley free day to do something I've been putting off for a while.

I'm going to force my dad to talk to me about what going on with him and my mom.

He has a hard time saying no to me and I plan to use that to my advantage.

I'm a woman on a mission!

And I will solve the mystery of what is going on with Parthur once and for all.

The name is Carlin, Spencer Carlin.

Ok, Ashley and I totally have to role play a spy scenario.

That would be so hot!

Oh!

Yeah!

I show up to the office without telling my dad.

That way he has no time to mount a defense or avoid me.

Excellent plan!

Don't you think?

I think about barging into his office but, knowing my luck, I'd cause a humongous scene that would completely distract from what I am determined to do.

When I ask his secretary about my dad's whereabouts she tells me he's in a meeting in the boardroom but should be out soon.

I don't wait for him where he can see me, though.

That would be too obvious!

I choose instead to hide around the corner and so I can keep my eye on the boardroom to make sure he doesn't leave without me knowing.

It's kind of hard to be incognito in an office that I used to work in, but luck seems to be on my side as no one has really noticed my presence.

Huh.

I wonder if that's a bad thing.

Oh well, I can't think about that or I'll get distracted

The door to the boardroom opens and now all I have to do is wait for the perfect opportunity to make my presence known.

Whoever my dad was meeting with leaves but he has to make an appearance.

Come on, Arthur, I don't have all day!

Actually, I do, because my girlfriend is on the other side of the country.

Boo!

Hiss!

I'm sad!

Finally my dad emerges from the boardroom but he's not alone.

He's with Madison.

The two of them are laughing about something.

Huh.

They're standing kind of close together.

And they're still laughing.

Huh.

That's interesting.

Why are they standing so close together?

It makes no sense to me.

Wait.

Wait.

Wait.

I must be imagining things.

Right.

Right?

Right!

Oh God!

I'm have to be delirious because I cannot possibly be witnessing what I think I'm witnessing.

I've suddenly got a really bad feeling in my stomach.

Madison leans in and whispers something to my dad that I can't hear and then her hand brushes his arm.

Oh God!

I'm going to be sick!

I knew it!

I knew Madison was no good!

All this time.

All this fucking time she's been pretending to be reformed or whatever.

What a fucking cow!

I'm so stupid.

We're all so stupid.

She's the reason that my parents' marriage is in the shitter.

What a backstabbing manipulative bitch she is!

I'm angry beyond belief right now.

I just can't believe it.

I always knew Madison was no good, but now is not a time to be excited about being right.

My abject horror at catching my dad with Madison is physically preventing me from moving.

I'm frozen in disbelief and disgust.

This can't be happening.

Somebody please tell me this isn't happening.

My dad and Madison walk off in different directions but I'm still unable to move.

I have no idea who I should be confronting first.

The sick feeling in my stomach changes to a ball of absolute rage and that makes my decision an easy one.

I practically sprint towards Madison's office and I could give two flying fucks if I'm about to cause a huge gigantic scene.

That's kind of the point.

Madison, the home wrecking whore that she is, barely has time to sit down at her desk before I come barging through the door.

"Hey, Spencer, what are you..."

I don't let Madison finish her sentence because I'm that damn mad.

"How could you?" I shout. "How could you fucking do this to my family? To my mother?"

We deserve answers damn it!

Madison is staring at me like I've lost my mind.

"Are you going to talk any time this century?" I ask sarcastically. "Or just sit there with your mouthing hanging open like a fucking fish?"

I've never truly felt close to acting violently until this moment.

Whatever happens, I'm sure my actions would be considered justifiable.

Who's with me?

"For fuck's sake, Madison, now is not the time to play games!" I tell her.

It's really, really not!

"Ok, Carlin, you really need to take a few deep breaths and explain to me what is is exactly that's going on," Madison says in a really calm voice.

Motherfucker!

Well, not exactly, but you know what I mean!

That girl is asking for it!

I slam my hands on Madison's desk to show her how fucking serious I am. "How long, exactly, have you been screwing my father?"

I laid it all out there for her.

I'd like to see Madison explain her way out of this one!

Her face is frozen in shock.

I bet she didn't expect her secret to be discovered.

No one pulls a fast one on Spencer Carlin.

No one!

Before I can interrogate Madison further, she bursts out laughing. "Are you high or something?"

Oh my God!

I can't believe she's trying to make a joke right now!

I'm going to end her!

"I know!" Madison exclaims through her chuckling. "I'm being Punk'd. Right?"

"How is any of this funny?" I ask in seething anger. "My parents' marriage is falling apart and you're the cause of that."

"Are you being serious?" Madison inquires in disbelief.

"Of course I'm being serious!" I snap. "I saw you with my dad. I saw you!"

Madison slowly rises from her chair and that causes the tiniest bit of fear to rise up in my chest. I mean, this is Madison we're talking about. Girl can take care of herself.

Yikes!

"Ok, I'm not sure when you boarded the train to crazy town," Madison says slowly and deliberately. "But I'm gay in case you've forgotten and, even if I wasn't, I would never, ever do anything like that with your father."

Yeah.

Right.

Whatever Madison is selling, I'm not buying.

"I bet that was just a cover to get in good with my family," I reply hotly. "Pretending to be gay so you could make a move on my dad."

What?

It makes perfect sense!

Madison's eyes open even wider than they were a few seconds ago. "Did you forget that we had sex?"

I do.

Every day.

That was such a horrible moment for me.

Ick.

"And I slept with Jessie," Madison continues. "Did you forget about that as well?"

I did actually.

Double ick.

Oh my God!

How long has Madison been planning this evil plan of hers?

She's more dastardly than I thought!

I'm about to yell even more at Madison for how awful she is when I catch how truly flabbergasted she looks.

Uh oh.

I didn't overreact.

Right?

Uh oh.

A feeling of regret and embarrassment is beginning to wash over me.

"I saw the two of you coming out of your meeting and you were laughing together and whispering and you touched his arm," I tell Madison to explain why I'm so damn mad at her.

I've always been told to trust my instincts and they've never led me astray before.

Oh fuck.

Madison rolls her eyes at me like only she can. "You're fucking insane, Carlin. We were laughing because of a joke one our clients told us and we were whispering because it's not a joke that's exactly appropriate for work so we didn't want to be overheard."

And the arm touching!

What about that!

"Besides the fact that I am not into men, why would you think your dad would even sleep with me?" she asks with just the right amount of disgust.

Not disgust because she's Madison.

More disgust because it's my dad we're talking about.

Ew!

"I...uh...I...uh..." I can't even form a sentence of any kind.

I flop down in the chair opposite Madison in defeat.

I've gone off the deep end before, but not like this.

Damn.

You know on the _Flinstones_ when Fred would do something stupid and then he'd shrink down to a teeny Fred because he was felt so stupid?

That's me!

Right now!

In Madison's chair!

Madison lets out a tiny chuckle. "You know, if I didn't think something was seriously wrong with you, I'd be highly offended that you'd think so poorly of me."

Aw!

Madison!

I know she's joking but as my mother always used to say: many a true word is said in jest.

I think I might have upset her.

Actually, I know on some level I probably have.

Score another success for Spencer!

I should have stayed in bed today.

"I'm really sorry, Madison," I say with as much honestly as I can. "It's just there is definitely something bad going on with my parents' marriage and nobody wants to talk about it. And I came here to talk to him about it and saw the two of you together and obviously just jumped to a really bad conclusion because I can't figure out why two people who love each other so much are clearly worlds apart..."

I'm not even taking a breath as I speak.

"...Which of course brings me to my brother and Aiden who aren't together anymore. Not that I blame Adien because Glen is a cheating bastard, but I do love him. And then there was the whole drama with Ashely and her sister..."

It's like a damn broke in me and there's no stopping.

"...and that took ages to fix, but, thankfully, things seem to be going so well with them. I'm happy for Ashley that goes without question but, God, it's been ages since we've had sex. Me and Ashley, that is, not me and Kyla, because ew that would so gross..."

I don't see an end to my rant any time soon.

"...but I miss sex with Ashley so much! And I'm totally sexually frustrated and I think that's one of the reasons I freaked out on you for no good reason..."

Oh wow.

I'm entering into some scary territory that could lead to my vault of secret information being released.

Ashley would never forgive me if Madison found out about her Mrs. Brady fantasies.

Then I'd never have sex again.

"Have you ever heard of too much information, Carlin?" Madison asks when I finally go silent.

Then she goes and does something truly awful.

"But you've clearly had an interesting time of late, so, I will pretend that you didn't come in here and accuse me of being a hussy and you can go on your merry way," Madison offers without a hint of sarcasm.

Nice, Madison!

She's still not someone I'm used to, especially when she has every right to act bitchy towards me.

"I really am sorry about your parents," she continues making me feel even worse. "But I don't think another person is involved if they're having issues. Your dad really is working late hours so I doubt he'd have the time to carry on an affair of any kind."

Well that makes me feel better because infidelity doesn't seem to be the cause of their strife.

But it doesn't really give me comfort of any kind.

Because there is something wrong and I'm no closer to finding out what that is.

Sigh.

I apologize profusely to Madison again before making a hasty exit from her office.

I head to speak with my father with a renewed sense of purpose even though I'm still feeling humiliated beyond belief.

I owe Madison a card, or flowers or anything to make up for my performance.

I'll get right on that after I corner my dad and get him to spill the beans.

I can do this!

* * *

Epic fail.

That would be the perfect way to describe this whole fucking day.

My dad was already locked into another meeting by the time I went to confront him and his secretary said it would be hours before he was free again.

I thought about staying to confront him but decided instead to go back home.

With my luck today I didn't trust what would happen if I did actually get a chance to have a moment with my dad.

I'm not an epic spy after all!

I'm more like Inspector Gadget.

Heh.

That sounds pervy.

I don't know how I'll ever face Madison again after that whole humiliating experience.

It's not like we hang out, but still. I made a fool of myself.

I'm so down on myself that when I get back home I don't notice at first that the sound of voices coming from the kitchen.

That is until I hear the laughter of a certain brunette who can make my toes curl with one look from her.

Ashley!

Oh my God!

She's home early!

But she didn't tell me that she was coming home early.

Oh my god!

Please don't let me be hallucinating!

I run towards the kitchen so fast it's a miracle I didn't hurt myself.

I barely notice that Kyla is in the kitchen as well when my eyes fall on Ashley's sexy self.

Oh my God!

She is here!

And it's not a dream!

Yay!

This is the best day ever!

Ever!

"Ashley!" I squeal because I can't contain my excitement.

I have no idea what her and Kyla are doing.

I have no idea why she didn't inform me of her early arrival.

I have no idea why my kitchen looks like a tornado hit it.

Because all I care about is that Ashley's home and I've missed her so much.

She twirls around and even though my mind is racing beyond belief I don't miss that her nose is adorably covered with some flour.

Aw!

She looks adorable!

And so fucking hot!

"Spence!' she squeals right back. "I was trying to surprise you!"

I don't give her a chance to explain why she was trying to surprise me because I launch myself at her.

Not that Ashley complains.

In fact, when I attack her with a series of kisses, she attacks me right back.

Oh God!

Her lips are so glorious!

Oh God!

I'm so happy right now, I could cry.

The sound of Kyla coughing makes our kissing stop.

Uh oh.

I might be very close to going on a murderous rage any second now.

"Hi, Spencer," Kyla says and she looks a tad uncomfortable.

Like I give a fuck!

Luckily Ashley still has her amazing arms wrapped around me so it prevents me from having a full nuclear meltdown.

And aw!

She doesn't want to let go of me!

Not that I blame her!

"Happy to have us home?" she asks with a smile I can't quite figure out.

No, moron, I'm happy to have Ashley home!

I don't say that though.

I can't believe I have the capability to sensor myself right now.

"Of course I am," I reply while managing not to sound like a royal bitch.

Go me!

"Not as happy as I am," Ashley whispers to me and then she nuzzles her face into my neck.

Oh God!

She makes me feel so good!

"Thanks for being understanding about the whole New York trip," Kyla says but that doesn't dull my hatred for her at all. "As a thank you, Ashley and I have arranged for Jessie to pick me up after work and I'm going to spend the weekend with her and Melissa."

Jessie and Melissa?

Oh my God!

Is there no one in my life that's safe from Kyla and her...

Whoa.

Wait.

What was that?

Let's rewind that sentence for a second.

_As a thank you, Ashley and I have arranged for Jessie to pick me up after work and I'm going to spend the weekend with her and Melissa_

Oh my God!

Oh my God!

Oh my God!

The whole weekend.

As in the entire weekend?

As in Ashley and I will have the weekend to ourselves without anybody else around?

Oh my God!

I love Kyla Woods so fucking much!

She's the best future sister-in-law ever!

How sweet is she!

Aw!

Kyla rocks!

Not as much as Ashley though!

"Seriously?" I ask before my hopes get any higher.

Ashley nods her head and the look in her eyes makes my legs quiver.

This is it.

What I've been waiting for.

Woo hoo!

That still doesn't explain what they were doing in the kitchen before I arrived home.

As if sensing my confusion, Ashley speaks up. "We were baking Jessie and Melissa chocolate chip cookies as a thank you for taking Kyla for the weekend."

Aw!

So thoughtful!

"Too bad Ashley over here is making things more complicated than they need to be," Kyla teases and I'm so happy right now I don't even care that she's still here.

Soon.

Soon she'll be gone and I'll be getting what I've been deprived of for so long.

Yes!

Yes!

Yes!

"Shut up," Ashley replies with a roll of her eyes. "You're the one that got the flour everywhere."

Oh, you Davies girls.

How cute are you?

Kyla answers that questions by flinging some flour in Ashley's direction and my girl responds in kind.

Before I know it, my kitchen has turned into a war zone and I'm the innocent victim.

Flour is going everywhere and we're laughing so hard I barley hear the phone ring.

Good things I'm responsible so I leave Ashley and Kyla to duke it out so I can find out who's calling.

"Hello?" I answer, slightly out of breath.

I don't get an immediate response and that makes me angry.

Fucking telemarketers!

They always have such bad timing.

I normally would give them a piece of my mind but I don't really care right now about them.

Ashley and Kyla have dissolved into hysterics and I want to join them.

I'm about to hang up when I hear the person on the other line say my name.

I can barely hear them though because it's so noisy in here.

"Hello!" I repeat louder. "Hello!"

I'm greeted with silence and I'm very close to blowing up when I hear the sounds of crying.

And it turns my blood cold in a way I've never felt before.

"Who is this?" I ask frantically.

"Spence, it's me."

Oh my God!

That's my mother's voice.

Oh my God!

Why is she crying?

I turn towards Ashley and Kyla, "Would you two shut the fuck up?" They look started and I don't care because they're finally quiet. Then I focus my attention back on the phone. "Mom, what's wrong?"

"It's your dad," she replies but it's hard to understand her because she sounds so distraught. "You need to come to the hospital right away."

The hospital?

What?

I don't understand what's going on.

I just saw him and he looked fine.

"Is he ok?" I ask as my stomach and heart drop a thousand feet.

"Hurry," my mom pleads before she starts crying again.

And then she hangs up the phone without giving me any more information.

Oh God!


	27. Chapter 27

**A/N - Flashbacks are in _italics_. Thanks as always for your feedback, it's very much appreciated. **

Chapter 27

_It's another hot L.A. day, but I don't have the energy to take advantage of the beautiful weather._

_I'm in the backyard with my feet dangling in our pool to try and cool off._

_Today is no ordinary day though._

_Today was to be the first day of my great European adventure with the girl I love._

_But that's not going to happen._

_Not now._

_Not ever._

_I'll probably be alone the rest of my life._

_Never getting to experience the joy of being in love again._

_I know I'm wallowing in self pity but I think I've earned the right to do that. I think I've earned the right when I found out from a friend that the two people I dislike most in this world are now on the trip that was supposed to be mine._

_The trip that wasn't a family vacation in which I was the kid along for the ride._

_The trip that was supposed to kick off the next stage in my life._

_The trip that was going to be my first step into adulthood, which I was going to experience it with a girl that loves me just as much as I love her._

_Yeah._

_Right._

_What a fucking joke._

_In a couple of months I'm going to head off to college and into a whole new world._

_This should be an exciting time for me._

_A time where all I want is to experience new things and meet new people._

_But that's not how I'm feeling now._

_All I want to do is go back in the past to a few months ago when my world had not fallen apart._

_To a moment when I was happy._

_When I had a girlfriend._

_And when I didn't feel so absolutely gutted._

_I can't imagine ever getting over this or ever feeling ok again._

_They're both ludicrous thoughts, but they are ones I can't get rid of._

_Sigh._

_I'm in such a malaise._

_I'm so immersed in my self pity that I don't notice my dad coming to sit beside me. He's still wearing his work clothes but he's taken his jacket and tie off and rolled up his pants so he can also dangle his feet in our pool._

_"Rough day?" he asks before he gives me a kiss on the forehead._

_I shrug pathetically in response because I'm not really sure how to answer. It's not like anything particularly bad happened today. It's just been as dreary as all the others I've experienced lately._

_"This too shall pass," my dad says to make me feel better. "But I know it doesn't feel like that right now."_

_I give my dad a half hearted attempt at a smile. "No, it really doesn't."_

_"We've all had our hearts broken at some point in our lives, Spence." My dad puts his arm around my shoulder and that actually does make me feel a little bit less depressed. "I promise you that one day this will all be but a distant memory."_

_He, of course, doesn't know everything that happened that night. I honestly can't imagine not feeling as hurt and betrayed as I do now._

_But I love him so much for trying._

_"Shouldn't you be at a work?" I ask because I don't really want to deal with my feelings anymore. _

_I just want to forget._

_My dad chuckles. "I'm playing hooky. Don't tell the boss or I'll get in big trouble."_

_I roll my eyes because he can be such a goof._

_"I thought maybe I could treat my favorite girl to ice cream," he sweetly offers. "Interested?"_

_"You better not let mom here you say that; she'd get jealous," I tease. This time when I smile, I'm not putting it on for show. _

_My dad gives me a wink. "We'll just keep this a secret between us."_

_The thought of going out isn't that appealing but my dad left work early to come try and cheer me up so it would be pretty selfish of me to say no._

_Besides, I'm never really one to turn down ice cream._

_"Wait," my dad says when I go to get up. "There's actually something I wanted to discuss with you."_

_Uh oh._

_That sounds ominous._

_I hate when someone says "I have something to discuss with you." That's almost always a bad thing._

_"What's up?" I reply as I chew on my lip_

_"I know your plans for the summer didn't work out the way you wanted them to," my dad starts and it's odd that he looks a bit nervous. "And I also know that this isn't your first choice," he says as he reaches into his pocket to show me something, "but how would you feel about the Carlins taking over Europe?"_

_I stare at the four airline tickets my dad is holding and I don't quite understand what is going on._

_The Carlins taking over Europe._

_Whoa._

_Wait._

_What?_

_Is he joking?_

_Or messing around?_

_He must be joking._

_I wish I could respond but I'm confused._

_"Unfortunately, Clay can't make it because he's already taking summer classes," my dad continues as I stay silent, "but it would be me, you, mom and Glen going. I've already booked us on a great tour that's going to squeeze in as many sites as possible in two weeks."_

_Oh my God!_

_Oh my God!_

_Oh my God!_

_"I know things haven't been easy for you the last few weeks, Spence, but maybe this will help." I think my dad is waiting for me to give him some kind of answer, but I'm truly blown away. "Everyone else is on board, it's really up to you now."_

_Oh my God!_

_I have the best family ever!_

_"What about work?" I ask because that's the first thing that pops into my head for some reason. When the hell did I get so practical? "I thought you had a big event coming up that you couldn't miss."_

_My dad works a lot._

_But I never feel like he's not around, or not there for me. Plus, when there's something going on that he thinks I will like, he always takes me with._

_I'm still in complete shock by the way._

_I can't believe he did this for me._

_That my whole family is actually going to do this for me._

_How did I get so lucky?_

_"Nothing is as important as family," my dad replies with a smile. "Besides, I'm sure the office can get by without me for a couple of weeks. Not to mention, I've always wanted to go to Europe and now I'm going to get the chance. That's actually the reason we're going but you can't tell anyone that secret either."_

_He's such a liar._

_Such a glorious, amazing, generous, wonderful, liar._

_We're going because of me._

_And I don't even mean that in a conceited kind of way._

_Oh my God!_

_I have so much to do before we leave._

_What am I going to pack?_

_I need to get film for my camera!_

_Oh my God!_

_Will I be able to use my hair dryer in Europe?_

_So many things to figure out._

_I practically leap to my feet, that's how excited I am!_

_I can honestly say this is the first time in what feels like forever that I'm actually looking forward to something as opposed to looking back in sadness._

_"I'll take that as a yes," my dad chuckles when he stands up as well._

_"Of course that's a yes!" I exclaim before I wrap my dad up in the biggest hug ever. "You are the coolest!"_

_Seriously!_

_He really is!_

_"You say that now," my dad replies with a really warm smile on his face, "but wait until I dance with you at your wedding. You'll see why the term 'two left feet' was invented."_

_And to prove his point, my dad starts twirling me around the backyard._

_Wedding!_

_Ha!_

_Good one!_

_It's more likely I'm going to end up some old lady with like fifty cats or something._

_"Dad!" I shriek even though his antics make me want laugh along with him. "Let me go!"_

_"Aw, don't spoil my fun, Spence," my dad implores me and if he wasn't about to give me such an awesome present, I might be inclined to protest longer. "One dance. For me?"_

_I feel like a tool but I do indulge my dad._

_I don't even care if we look stupid because I'm too busy thinking about how my summer just got a lot better._

_Sure, I'm not taking my dream trip with the girl of my dreams, but I am going to spend two weeks with three people who care are a lot about me._

_Things could be worse._

_Right?_

_I think my dad is trying to waltz with me but I don't think we're doing it right._

_He seems happy though so I'll let him have his fun._

_Even if he's a bit of a dork._

_Or a big one._

_"Arthur! What are you doing?"_

_My dad and I stop dancing as my mom comes around the corner. She sounds exasperated but I can tell by her eyes that she's not really upset._

_"Dancing with my favorite daughter," my dad replies, giving me another wink._

_See!_

_He is a dork!_

_"I'm your only daughter," I deadpan but it's really hard for me not to smile._

_This is the happiest I've felt in so long._

_"Don't let Glen here you say that," my dad jokes and I'm sure that he doesn't mean anything bad by it._

_Glen and I have felt nothing but acceptance from both my parents and I know my dad is really proud of him._

_I"m not sure why though._

_He can be such an ass at times!_

_But he is coming on this trip so he can't be all that bad._

_Even if I suspect it's because he wants to drool all over the foreign men I'm sure we'll see._

_"I bet you want to start packing," my mom says to me with a knowing look. "Remember there's a limit on how many bags you can bring."_

_Aw!_

_She's so sweet!_

_And dang, I'll really have to be choosy on what I take with me._

_"Thanks, mom!" I squeal before I hug her tightly._

_She deserves it!_

_Not just for rescuing me from my dancing dad, but also for giving up two weeks to make me feel better._

_"Hey, where are you going?" my dad calls out but I'm already halfway into the house. "I thought we were going for ice cream?"_

_Sorry, pops, I've got way too much to do before we leave!_

_Ice cream will have to wait!_

_Wow, I can't believe I just thought that!_

_But in all seriousness, I really will have to find a way to say thank you to him for everything he's done._

_And I don't just mean this trip, even though that's so thoughtful of him._

_When I realize that I don't even know when we're leaving, I decide to head back to the backyard to find out._

_Oh my God!_

_What if it's tomorrow!_

_That's not enough time to be ready!_

_I don't have a chance to ask him though because when I am back outside I find my mother and father kissing._

_Ew!_

_I mean, they're not making out or anything but, still._

_Ew!_

_They pull apart and don't even notice me standing there._

_Despite the fact that they are my parents, I suppose on some level it's sweet that they can look at each other with such love after all these years._

_On the other hand...ew!_

_Before I can be scarred further, I take off once again for my room and the daunting task of packing for our trip._

_Our trip!_

_Woo!_

_Hoo!_

_I have a feeling these two weeks are going to be two weeks I..._

_

* * *

_"Spence?"

Oh god!

This can't be real.

This isn't real.

"Spence?"

Please don't let this be real!

I bet you I'm dreaming.

Having the worst nightmare possible.

There's no way this is real.

Right?

"Spence!"

Ashley says my name more forcefully and it causes my eyes to come into focus.

I"m still buckled into the passenger seat of her car.

At some point she must have gotten out because now my door is open and she's crouching down and looking at me with those concerned brown eyes of hers.

I have no idea how we got here.

Or really anything that's transpired since I got that awful phone call.

This isn't real.

It can't be real.

I feel disjointed from reality.

Like I'm watching everything unfold but I can't really tell you what is going on.

I'm numb.

And in shock.

But deep down the darkest of fears is threatening to take over.

This isn't real.

It can't be real.

I refuse to believe it is.

My dad is invincible.

And strong.

This isn't real.

It can't be real.

"Come on," Ashley says in such a soft voice. She unclips my seat belt and then guides me out of the car.

I don't know how she got me into the car in the first place.

I don't know what's happened to Kyla.

I don't even know how I told Ashley about my dad.

Oh God!

My dad!

This isn't it real.

It can't be real.

My body starts to tremble but I don't feel anything.

Ashley must have noticed because her arm goes firmly around me as she leads me inside

Oh God!

Inside!

Inside the hospital!

My dad is inside the hospital!

Oh God!

This isn't real.

It can't be real.

My mom was so distraught when she called.

I've never, ever heard her sound so undone.

I don't think I can do this.

Face what awaits for me on the other side of these doors.

What if...

Oh God!

I can't even finish that thought because it's too awful to consider.

I don't even understand how he ended up in the hospital.

I just saw him hours ago and he was laughing.

He looked fine.

Oh God!

This isn't real.

It can't be real.

There's no way I can handle things if...

Oh God!

Please let him be ok!

Please let him be ok!

Please let him be ok!

He has to be.

Ashley stops me right before we enter the emergency room.

She puts her hands on my shoulder and then looks me right in the eye.

Oh God!

I don't have any idea how I'm standing up right when the weight of what could be is threatening to crush me.

My eyes start to brim with tears.

My lip is quivering.

I'm nowhere near strong enough to handle this kind of thing.

"Whatever happens," Ashley begins with an intensity I've never really seen before. Her hands comes up to cup my cheek. "I'm here, ok? We'll get through whatever happens. Ok?"

I nod my head even though things are far from ok.

I'm so scared.

I don't think I've ever felt fear like this.

This isn't real.

It can't be real.

I'm trying so hard to wake up but it isn't working.

All around me people are talking.

But I feel so disconnected.

Like I'm in a bubble.

All I hear is muffled sounds.

This isn't real.

It can't be real.

My legs feel like I have concrete attached to them.

They are so heavy.

And unmoving.

Just like how the rest of my body feels.

"Spence..."

Ashley's voice finds its way through the white noise and my bubble.

I don't respond to her.

I can't.

It's taking all my energy not to have a complete breakdown.

Maybe I'll walk inside and find out all of this has been one giant miscommunication.

My dad is fine.

All of us are fine.

And nothing will have changed.

Maybe...

Oh God!

As Ashley takes my hand in hers and squeezes it, everything comes rushing at me at once.

This is real.

So fucking real.

And I can't pretend it isn't anymore.

I'm on the verge of having a panic attack.

I think.

I assume this is what one feels like.

My breathing is labored.

My nerves shot beyond belief.

And my chest is tightening.

We just need to find my mom.

She'll know what to do.

She always has the answer.

Always.

She'll figure out a way to make all of this better.

I'm sure of it.

I think I'm going to be sick.

My stomach has a pit in it the size of a boulder.

"Spencer!"

This time it isn't Ashley saying my name.

I look to the left of me and what I see causes my heart to sink.

I barely catch sight of Jessie and Glen.

My eyes are drawn only to my mother.

Her strangled sob after she called out my name is almost too much for me.

I need her so much now.

I need her to make it all better.

But when I see how wrecked she is, I know that isn't going to happen.

As much as I need my mom, its clear she needs more.

I reluctantly let go of Ashley's hand and the comfort it brings me, in order to get to my mom.

When I embrace her, she's in tears before my arms are fully around her.

I have no idea what's to come but I will find a way to be strong for my mom.

I don't know how, but I will do it.

Because it's exactly what my dad would expect of me.

And I won't let him down.

That I guarantee.


	28. Chapter 28

**A/N - I cannot believe I haven't updated this story in so long. My sincere appreciation to all of you have left me feedback on this story, both recently and when I first posted this. I can't tell you exactly when this story will be completed, but I will will do my absolute best to finish it. Thanks again to all of you have have read and reviewed, I hope there are still some of you left :)**

Chapter 28

As quickly as my mom latched on to me, she lets go and takes off mumbling something about checking for an update on my dad.

I have no time to react.

No time to ask her what is going on and if my dad's ok.

I suppose if it was really bad news she would have said something.

Right?

As real as things felt moments ago, I'm back to experiencing this all in the most surreal of ways. Everything is happening in slow motion and yet it feels like the world is rushing past me.

I know I'm not making sense but nothing makes sense.

How could a man as wonderful as my father be going through something so horrible?

Bad things happen to good people all the time, but right now I don't give a fuck about anything logical or how unfair life is. My dad is lying somewhere in this hospital and there's nothing I can do to make this better.

And I still don't have answers.

The tears that I've been fighting since I received that call from my mother are on the brink of emerging. The shock I've experienced is threatening to wear off and reality is about to rear its ugly head.

Ashley puts her arm around my shoulder and as much as I want to let go of everything I'm feeling, I don't.

I need to be strong.

I need to be the pillar of strength I know I can be.

Whatever it takes, I will be the person my dad expects me to be.

There are so many things going through my mind that I can only focus on keeping my shit together. Anything else will take too much effort and I can't breakdown.

I won't breakdown.

I've already been selfish enough these last few months. Now it's my turn to put aside my feelings and concentrate my efforts on everyone else.

I look around to find out where my mom went as Ashley continues to hold onto me.

I see her talking to a nurse or somebody who works at the hospital. She doesn't seem as frantic or hysterical as when I first arrived and that allows to keep calm.

For now.

Glen and Jessie get up to greet me.

I have no clue what they are saying to me.

I embrace them back when they hug me, but their words are hard to make out.

Glen sits back down before I have a chance to ask him how he's doing. But I don't really need to ask. The grief stricken look on his face says more than words ever could.

His eyes are moist.

I know he's barely hanging on, too.

I want to give him the comfort he deserves, but I'm still kind of lost in my head and my thoughts. I guess I'm not doing the best job at being the rock of support I want to be.

I wish there was a way to make my mind less cluttered.

That's not the easiest of tasks on a good day.

Actually, what I wish more is that my dad was not in the hospital and I wasn't waiting to find out if he's going to live or...

Oh god!

I can't finish that sentence.

Some of Jessie's words start to make their way through the haze that I'm experiencing.

She says something about my dad collapsing in a meeting.

Oh god!

I don't know how much of this I can stand.

There was chaos.

Nobody knew what was wrong.

My dad had stopped breathing.

Oh god!

I feel my chest start to tighten up as I squeeze my eyes shut.

Madison rushed over to my dad.

I think Jessie mentions the words 'CPR'.

I can't be sure though.

How can any of this be real?

My dad isn't weak.

He's the strongest person I know.

He's invincible.

He's my hero.

And heroes don't get sick.

They don't have heart attacks.

That is what they suspect happened to my dad.

Jessie gives me another hug and this time I hug her back even harder than she's holding on to me. I know this must be so tough for her as well.

Not only because she was there when my dad collapsed. She's been a part of this family for a long time and she must be just as scared as I am.

We can't lose him now.

Jessie only lets go of me when her name is called out from a voice behind me.

It's Melissa.

I had no doubt she'd show up and I can only imagine how much of a relief it must be for my friend to have her wife and partner arrive.

I know how much I need Ashley and how much comfort she brings me.

Words are exchanged, Melissa hugs me as well as everyone else, but my mind is not up to processing exactly what is going on.

So much has happened in such a short period of time that there's only so much information I can take in.

The longer we go without news on my dad's condition, the worse my imagination gets. It's horrifying what situations I've been thinking about.

Then again, this whole situation is horrifying.

Ashley guides me to a nearby seat and I don't protest.

I want to.

I want to be strong enough to take control of things.

I want to be the commanding presence that will ensure that everything is going to be ok.

I can't though.

I have no power to make things better.

I have no power to change what happened.

I have no power to make sure my dad is ok.

Helpless is a great way to describe what I'm feeling at this moment.

Helpless and scared beyond anything I've ever felt before.

It doesn't escape my attention, despite everything that is going on, that my brother has no one here to provide him the support and comfort that Jessie and I have.

Not to say that wasn't of his own doing but now is not the time to dwell on the giant mistakes that Glen has made. It must be hard for him to watch Ashley and Melissa be there for us in a way that Aiden used to be there for him.

I don't even have a chance to voice what I'm thinking before Ashley leans over and whispers in my ear, "I think I should call Aiden."

I nod my head as I look into her caring eyes. I can see how worried she is.

For my father.

For me.

For everyone.

And I can only imagine that this is stirring up some memories for her that must be beyond painful. Not to mention I know how much she loves my dad.

We all do.

I want to ask her how she's doing.

If this is too much.

But I can't.

I'm barely keeping it together.

Does that make me awful?

I don't have the capacity to deal with that kind of question at this moment.

I can tell that Ashley doesn't want to leave my side but I also can tell she doesn't want to make the call to Aiden with everyone around.

He's going to be devastated too.

Like we all are.

He was treated just like a member of the family and I know he's kept in touch with my dad even though he and Glen broke up.

When you become a Carlin, it's for life.

Not one of us has stopped caring about Aiden just because of what happened between him and my brother.

I was always taught how important family was by both my parents, but that lesson always seemed to come a bit more from my father. He always showed us how important we were to him and that's a lesson I want one day to teach my kids.

Oh god!

All of a sudden I'm hit with flashes of what my life would be like without my dad there.

My wedding.

When we tell the family that we're pregnant.

The birth of our first child.

And our second.

Hearing our kids call him Grandpa.

Countless celebrations that he won't be a part of.

Not just for Ashley and me, but for everyone.

I feel sick.

I want to throw up.

I won't though.

I can't.

This isn't the time.

I use every ounce of energy I have to suppress the pain that I'm feeling so I can deal with whatever is about to come.

Ashley is back before my mom is and I'm very close to going to find out if she has any news about how my dad is doing.

I keep seated though because I can only imagine what she is going through and I'm sure the last thing she needs is for me to pester her.

What she actually needs is deal with this whatever way she wants to and for all of us to just be there in any way we can.

It's not easy staying back.

It's not easy realizing that there's nothing you can do.

Talk about feeling useless.

"It's going to be ok," Ashley whispers in my ear even though she has no way of knowing that. "It's going to be ok."

Is it?

What if…

What if…

Oh god!

I can't even think it.

I'm not mad at her.

She's saying it to make me feel better. The only way I can feel better is to know my dad is fine.

"I know," I tell her because I think that's what I'm supposed to say.

She places a soft kiss on my forehead and I'm so grateful that she's here with me right now. I don't know what I would have done if I received that call from my mom with Ashley still being in New York.

I really don't know.

And I'm grateful beyond belief that I don't even have to worry about what that would have been like.

"No news yet," my mom announces as she takes a seat beside me.

All of sit up in our chairs and I leave the comfort of Ashley to take my mom's hand. I squeeze it tightly so I can convey what I'm feeling as words seem inadequate.

She looks like she's aged ten years and her eyes are red and watery.

I wish I could take her pain away.

So many times she's been there for me and helped me through whatever it was I was going through. She's always given me exactly what I've needed and I hope that I can do the same.

I can only imagine what is going on in her mind.

It must be hundred times worse than what is going on in mine. Not only is she worrying about her husband but she must also be thinking about her kids and making sure we're ok.

Oh god!

Her kids!

Not all her kids are here.

Clay.

Clay and Chelsea are god knows where and I can't believe I didn't think of them before.

Someone has to tell them what's happened, if that hasn't been done already.

My thoughts must be very transparent for some reason because my mom lets me know that she can't reach Clay even though she's been trying ever since she got to the hospital. Her voice cracks and her head finds its way to my shoulder.

I wrap my arm around my mother like Ashley did to me. I feel her start to cry again but she's not sobbing hysterically. Instead tears are just falling and for some reason that strikes me even sadder than when I first saw her.

It's almost like she's resigning herself to the worst.

"I'll take care of it," Ashley assures my mom. "Don't worry, he'll get the news."

"Thank you, Ashley," my mom replies, her gratefulness evident.

I don't have time to ask Ashley exactly how she's going to do that because she quickly steps away from where we are seated to make another phone call. I'm not sure who she's talking to but I have no doubt that she'll keep her promise.

Our little group is silent.

Our thoughts only focused on one thing.

On one person.

Ashley returns and sits on the other side of my mom.

Each of us is holding one of her hands.

Giving her whatever strength she needs.

It's the least we can do.

"Paula."

All of our heads shoot up in the direction of the voice that's broken our little bubble of silence and prayer.

I have no idea who this guy is.

And I also have no idea if the news he's about to give is good or bad.

His poker face is so hard to read and it's causing my throat to tighten up so much that I can barely breathe. I start to panic but I will myself to keep calm.

It's not easy.

"Let's go over there and talk," he suggests without any emotion in his voice.

My mom squeezes my hand so hard that it's difficult not to react.

I can see how frightened she looks, but I can also see how hard she's fighting not to cause a scene.

This can't be good.

Right?

I mean, why the need to take us somewhere else to say whatever it is he has to say.

I look over at Ashley and her eyes find mine.

I'm here.

Whatever happens we'll deal with it together.

I love you.

I hear her messages to me loud and clear and it does help ease my worries, just a little.

My mom nods her head before all of us get up to follow the stranger that could change all of our lives with just a few words.

Oh god!

We all huddle together as we wait for the news on my dad to be delivered.

Oh god!

The doctor starts to talk but I can barely make out what he's saying.

It's all too much.

Too much information.

His words are fleeting and it's like I'm only about to process half of what is coming out of his mouth.

Heart attack…

Massive blockage…

Lucky to be alive….

Oh god!

Thank you god!

He is alive!

There's more though.

Critical condition…

Next twenty four hours are imperative…

Surgery…

Bypass…

Immediately…

I see the relief on my mother's face but I also see that she knows this isn't over.

My mom nods her head furiously when the doctor asks her for permission to operate. He presents her with a form and she lets go of my hand to sign it.

He starts talking about what's going to happen during the surgery and once again it feels like I'm stuck in a bubble as the rest of the world rushes by me.

Oh god!

Please let the surgery go ok!

Please let him be ok!

Please!

She asks to see him before they get started but the doctor says there isn't enough time and they have to get started right away.

She begs him.

And it's so sad.

How can they say no?

This could be her last…

Oh god!

I can't let my mind go there.

Eventually he relents and the two of them rush off to wherever my dad is.

A nurse comes by to show us where we should go now that my dad isn't in the emergency room anymore.

My stomach lurches as I reach out for Ashley.

No one can tell us how long the surgery will take.

No one tells us anything really.

All we can do now is wait.

No matter how difficult that is going to be.

* * *

**I know! I don't update in over a year and I leave the chapter off that way - what a tease! My next update will be up in a week. I swear on my honour as lesbian :)**


	29. Chapter 29

**A/N - First of all thank you so much to all of you who let me know you're still interested in my story! Really, big hugs to you all! It was really nice to hear after so much time has passed. Not a hundred percent sure when I have the next chapter ready but I will be trying my hardest to maintain a schedule of updating at least once a week. Thanks again! **

Chapter 29

I hate waiting.

It sucks.

Everything about this whole situation sucks, actually.

If I thought I felt useless and helpless before, it is nothing compared to how I'm feeling now.

I know I couldn't even do anything to help my dad even if I wanted to, but that doesn't stop me for wishing that I could. It's beyond logic and reason and yet I can't stop myself from feeling that way. Instead, I'm stuck in this tiny, very impersonal room with nothing to do but wait.

Ugh.

I'm frustrated beyond belief.

And scared.

And freaked out.

And nervous.

And filled with a lot of anxiety.

I'm actually experiencing so many things at once that what I'm going through is nearly impossible to describe or articulate.

Of course, I'm not what I should be focused on.

This is about my dad.

And my mother.

And everyone else.

And making sure that we all get through this, whatever 'this' turns out to be.

Not an easy task, but one I hope I'm up for. Especially with the love and support of the most amazing woman that I'm lucky enough to be in love with and who loves me back. Ashley has been everything I've needed her to be and she's done it all without missing a beat.

Anything that could be handled by her, she's done an amazing job of. Clay has been found, Aiden has been called and she's made sure there's been an ample supply of coffee and food for all of us in the waiting room. Not that any of us are eating, mind you, but it is the thought that counts.

I never knew time could go so slowly and yet feel like it's moving at a lightning speed all at once. I don't know if I should be thinking that no news is good news. Or whether I should start to worry that the longer we go without an update on my dad's condition, the worse the outcome will be.

My dad wasn't conscious when my mom got those few moments to see him. She didn't say much when she joined us afterwards but I think a big part of her was relieved to get the chance to be with him before the surgery began.

Oh god!

My dad's in surgery!

He had a heart attack!

Oh god!

This is actually happening!

It's not a nightmare!

I won't be waking up anytime soon!

I don't know how it's possible to go from completely numb, to stark reality to avoiding thinking about what could happen to going numb again.

It feels like years ago that I was in my house laughing and making a mess with Ashley and Kyla.

Not hours.

How is that even possible?

We've all tried giving my mom as much support as we can. I know she appreciates it, but I think she's just trying to get through this waiting like we all are. The man she loves the most in the world is fighting for his life and there's nothing she can do about it.

If I feel helpless, I can't even imagine what she's going through.

She's trying to be strong for us.

It's not easy though.

And she doesn't need to be.

She left a few minutes ago to go for a bit of a walk. I didn't want her to go, but I'm not about to tell her how to handle the stress of this awful waiting game we're all playing.

None of us have really spoken since she left and the quiet is both welcoming and hard to handle.

I'm leaning into Ashley, with my eyes closed. She's running her fingers through my hair and then every once in a while she places a kiss on my head. Describing what she's doing as comforting doesn't even do justice to how much she's helping me.

I assume the same goes for Jessie with Melissa.

And then there's Glen.

Still alone.

Aiden hasn't shown up, but I'm almost certain he will.

I've tried a few times to engage Glen in a conversation or give him a hug, but I've been met with a lot of resistance and mostly silence from him. I can only guess how lonely he's feeling on top of everything else that he's going through. My brother is known for shutting down versus reaching out for help and I guess now is no different.

I wish I knew what I could do to help him.

I wish a lot of things.

"I can't sit here anymore," Glen announces without warning. My eyes open and I can see that he has the attention of all four of us. "I just can't!" He gets up to leave and he's gone before anyone can stop him.

I let out a loud sigh.

"I can go after him," Ashley offers sweetly.

I sigh again, "No, I'll go." I squeeze Ashley's hand to let her know how much I appreciate her thoughtfulness. "Let me know if you hear anything; I'll have my phone with me."

"Of course," Ashley assures me. She doesn't let me go before she gives me a warm embrace.

I look over at Jessie and Melissa and can tell how worried they both are. Not just for my dad, but for Glen, too. I try to show them how confident I am that I can solve this problem even though I have no idea how to reach my brother.

I'm a few steps out of the waiting room when I spot Glen down the all pacing back and forth. He appears to be coming undone and I'm not sure what to do. My dad might know, but he's not here. Neither is my mom, so that leaves me to figure things out on my own.

"Glen..." I start cautiously as I approach my brother.

I guess I'm going to have to improvise.

So far, I have nothing.

"Save it, Spencer," Glen cuts in and the expression of anger on his face stops me in my tracks.

I've never seen him like this.

I want more than anything to take away the hurt he's feeling.

I know he's not mad at me.

That's he's just reacting to this whole messed up situation.

But that doesn't stop me from being unsure of what to do next.

"I can't just sit around doing nothing," Glen continues, each word coming out of his mouth laced with more venom than the last. "I can't!"

He's face is starting to turn red and his movements a bit more manic.

I can understand why he's angry.

I'm angry too.

But now is not the time for that anger to come out.

How do I solve a problem like Glen?

I'm fresh out of ideas.

Glen's face suddenly changes from anger, to surprise, back to anger and then to goes to an emotion I cannot figure out.

He's not even looking at me anymore, but past me, so I turn around to find out what caught his attention.

Aiden.

He's finally arrived at the hospital.

No words are exchanged between the two exes.

They enter this kind of weird stand off and once again I'm left feeling like I should be doing something, but not knowing what that something is.

Glen's face starts to soften, his eyes start to tear up and my heart aches for him.

Aiden takes a few long strides towards my brother and gets there right as Glen breaks down in his arms. It's a wrenching scene that my presence is no longer needed in. I leave Glen knowing that Aiden will be there for him and now my thoughts can focus on my mother.

I have a pretty good idea of where she went. I think now would be a good time to go and check on her. I exchange a few messages with Ashley to let her know where I'm headed and then I'm off.

* * *

After I open the door to the hospital chapel it doesn't take me long to spot my mom sitting alone in the front by herself.

"Hey, Mom," I say as I take a seat beside her. My mom turns her head and gives me the saddest of looks. "I hope you're ok with me being here," I cover my mom's hand with my own, "I don't want to intrude..."

"You're not intruding," my mom assures me before I can finish what I was going to say. "How are you doing?"

That's not the question that needs to be asked.

What I'm going through isn't what the focus of this conversation needs to be.

Honestly, I want to answer her though. I want to unload every thought, every fear, every bit of anxiety I've experienced. I want so much to let go and let my mom be the one to keep me together.

Keep me from losing my shit.

Keep me sane.

I can't do that.

I won't do that.

No matter how much I want to.

"How are you doing?" I repeat back to her.

She shrugs her shoulders and tries to smile, "As good as can be expected." She puts her head on my shoulder like she did in the emergency room and it takes a lot on my part not to cry. I can't ever remember seeing my mom like this and it scares me.

"He'll be ok, you know," I say even though I have no clue what is about to happen. "He's too stubborn not to make it." I feel my mom nodding in agreement but she doesn't say anything. "You always said I get my stubbornness from him."

"That's true," my mom agrees. I'm almost certain I hear the faintest of chuckles coming from her.

The conversation stops as neither one of us seem all that keen to talk right now.

"We had a fight this morning," my mom announces out of the blue, causing my stomach to drop. I have a strong suspicion I'm not going to like where this is headed. "The biggest one we've ever had."

Her voice cracks as my chest tightens. I really don't want to be hearing this, but I keep quiet. The only thing I do is give her hand another squeeze as a sign of encouragement.

Her head moves from my shoulder and that's when I can see that she's started to cry. Tears are falling from her eyes and I'd give anything right about now to take the pain she's experiencing away. "It was awful. I told him..."

"You don't have to do this," I tell my mom despite me feeling the complete opposite. It just seems that's something I should say and I don't know why.

She starts to shake her head slowly as the tears continue to flow. "I tried so many times to talk to your father about how much he was working, but nothing ever changed. I didn't know what else to do."

"It's ok," I reply. "He'll be ok."

"What if he's not?" My mom asks her crying intensifying. "The last thing I said to him before he left for this office this morning was that I wanted a trial separation."

Oh god!

What?

Oh god!

How did I not know how bad things were between them?

Oh god!

I have to hold back a gasp because I don't want to upset my mom even more than she is already.

I can't process this.

I don't have a clue how to process this.

We're talking about my parents here.

I never saw this coming!

I should have seen this coming!

Oh god!

A separation!

My parents?

I feel physically sick but I make sure to hide my pain as best as I can.

I should have pushed more.

Both of them.

I think it's clear that I should have done a lot of things the last few months, but didn't.

"You should have seen his face when I said that," My mom continues, oblivious to the inner turmoil her news has set off inside my head.

I don't blame her for telling me.

I just wish I could have helped more.

"He looked devastated," she whispers. "I bet you that's the reason..."

"Don't!" I interject before my mom can finish. "This isn't your fault." Thankfully I'm not too far in my mind that I'm able to form words. "None of this is your fault."

I'm starting to feel a little bit like it's mine.

I could have stepped in.

Found out exactly how bad things were and knocked some sense into my dad.

"I love him so much," my mom cries, "I just want the chance to tell him that again."

There's a huge lump forming in my throat.

The raw emotion my mother feeling is too much.

All of this is heartbreaking.

And totally unnecessary.

No job, no amount of money, is worth his life.

Oh god!

How did everything get so fucked up?

"He knows that," I assure my mom. I'm not just trying to make her feel better. I've never doubted how my parents feel about each other. "And you'll get your chance to say those words to him the second he wakes up from his surgery."

"I don't know, Spence," my mom replies solemnly. "I just don't know."

It's a good thing I'm not looking to my mom to make me feel better because right now I think I'm at my lowest point since finding out about my dad. I realize this isn't about me, but that doesn't stop the weight I feel on my shoulders and chest from increasing.

This is the lowest I've probably ever been and I suddenly feel all alone.

I keep trying to comfort my mother and eventually her tears subside. I'm thankful even though I don't know how long she'll be able to stay calm.

Please god!

Please let him be ok!

Please help my mom!

I repeat those three things over and over again, hoping that they're making some sort of difference.

I'm so engrossed in my silent prayers that I don't notice Ashley joining my mom and me. She doesn't sit beside me. Instead she sits on the other side of my mom and takes her hand.

"I thought Mr. C. could use the extra prayers right now," she explains, making my heart ache and swell with love and pride simultaneously.

Ashley and God have a funny relationship.

And by that I mean she doesn't really have one with him.

But I know why she's here.

For me.

For my dad.

For my mom.

I'm simply in awe by how amazing she's been since I got that awful call. It's not that I doubted Ashley's ability to handle a crisis but she's surpassed every expectation on what kind of partner I wanted in my life.

"I hope you don't mind," Ashley finishes, her voice soft and full of compassion.

My mom gives Ashley a genuine smile because I think she realizes as well why Ashley is making the effort that she is. "Absolutely not."

After my mom closes her eyes, I look over at Ashley and mouth "I love you" to her because I really need her to know that.

"I love you too," Ashley mouths back making me feel the tiniest bit better.

Then the gravity of the situation creeps back in my head.

We're still possibly hours away from news on my dad.

And the waiting begins again.

* * *

I'm back in that awful room with everyone.

My head perks up when I notice the door opening.

Oh god!

This is it!

My dad's surgeon is about to give us news.

Oh god!

The tension in the room increases exponentially when the rest of our group realizes what is about to happen.

Oh god!

Is it a prerequisite that all doctors have unreadable faces?

Oh god!

I can't tell if we're about to get news that brings elation or shatters our world.

Oh god!

I'm holding onto Ashley so hard I'm probably hurting her but she doesn't protest or tell me to relax.

Oh god!

We stand up and I make sure that near my mom so I can be there no matter what the doctor says.

Every nerve of mine is frayed, but taking a page from the surgeon I mask that as best as possible.

He starts to talk, but my world remains silent.

Oh god!

I can't make out what he's saying!

Oh god!

And just like before only fragments of his sentences are filtering their way to my brain.

Complications…

Critical…

Longer than we thought…

Oh god!

I start to tremble.

Lucky…

Wait.

What?

All of a sudden my ears pop and sounds comes rushing back faster than I can process it.

But I do hear the words "expect him to make a full recovery."

Nothing else matters.

Oh god!

Full recovery.

The room explodes with relief and happiness.

And for the first time in hours I'm able to breathe.


	30. Chapter 30

**A/N Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! You guys are awesome, I really appreciate your feedback :) Will be back soon...promise! **

Chapter 30

He's alive!

He's alive!

He's alive!

You'll have to excuse me; my head is all over the place.

More than normal, that is.

I didn't mean to sound like I'm in some sort of cheesy horror movie from the '50s instead of reveling in the best news I could have possibly received.

The rush of emotions I've experienced since my dad's surgeon told us he's going to be ok has been overwhelming. Of course, we have to be a bit cautious because things can always go wrong and he's still in critical condition, but the overall message has been positive.

There's been a lot of hugging and tears - happy tears - since that amazing moment.

I feel like I've been awake for a week I'm that emotionally drained. At the same time I feel elation beyond description.

He's going to be ok.

My dad is going to be ok.

I need to repeat that over and over again so the news sinks in. Just like I had trouble processing the fact that he had a heart attack and could die, this fantastic turn of events is difficult for me to digest.

Ashley is off somewhere making sure that Clay knows what's happened and everyone else is still in the waiting room as we wait to find out what comes next. Waiting still sucks, but not nearly as bad as before. We made sure to send messages to the staff at my dad's company and to other important people in our lives that knew he was in the hospital.

Good news is much more fun to spread than the bad kind.

I don't think I've experienced such a drastic change in mood like what took place today.

I've been so very low and now I'm so very high.

It's amazing really.

How everything can go from near disaster to working out nicely.

Amazing.

Except...

No.

No exceptions.

I won't let there be any.

"How's Clay?" I ask Ashley when she returns to my side, a place she hasn't really moved from this whole time. "Is he still planning on coming home?"

"Relieved and happy," Ashley replies right after I get a little kiss from her. There's never not a good time for one of those. "He's trying to find a way for him and Chelsea to leave, but he's not sure if that's possible right now."

"Thankfully he can wait a bit if necessary." I reply.

"We have a lot to be thankful for," Ashley wisely says as her arms hold me tight.

It feels so good to have her for support.

To know that she's here for me when I've really needed her.

However, where I found relief and strength in Ashley's embrace earlier, I now find myself not wanting to be comforted by her at all.

It's the strangest sensation and I don't know that I can describe why I'm starting to feel this way. There's been this little ball of anxiety sitting in my stomach this whole time we've been at the hospital. I've forced it to remain small and not let it get out of control, but I'm finding that increasingly difficult.

I can't afford to show weakness now.

I need to be strong.

I have to be strong.

I made a promise to be strong.

I've spent a lot of the last number of months focusing on me and...

No.

No thoughts like that.

I can't.

I just can't.

I reluctantly move away from Ashley even though I really don't want to. The problem I've realized is that she has the ability to soften my attempts to be tough and strong. Ashley has always found her way past the defenses I sometimes put up and it seems that is still the case. "That we do."

"You ok, Spence?" Ashley asks the concern evident in her voice and the way touches the side of my face.

If I look in those brown eyes of hers, my resolve to be strong would be gone instantly. "Yeah, I'm good. I just wish the doctor would come back so we can see my dad." I look quickly at Ashley but avoid holding her gaze.

My anxiety level is starting to rise, that ball that was in the pit of my stomach is moving upwards, and it is also growing in size.

I don't understand what is going on with me.

I'm suddenly conscious of my breathing and how labored it feels.

This can't be good.

It's like I have this excess of energy that I have to burn off. I start tapping my foot because I cannot stay still.

I need to be moving.

In some way.

That some way isn't out the door though.

I would never do that.

"Spence?" Ashley's voice is so gentle and soft, but it's obvious that she's not buying what I'm trying to sell. "What's going on?" She gently takes my hand and I have to fight every instinct to pull away.

This is awful!

What am I doing?

Why is my gut telling me to avoid Ashley at a time when I need her so much?

I don't get it.

"Spence?" Ashley tries again, causing me to get more fidgety.

"Later, ok?" I offer in an effort to placate my wonderful girl for the time being. There are just too many things swirling around in my mind for me to deal with right now.

Later sounds so much better.

Ashley nods, but I can tell she's concerned.

I'm too focused on acting like everything's fine to worry about what I'm doing.

Tough Spencer will have to stick around for just a little longer.

When I'm just about ready to gnaw another fingernail off, one of my dad's doctors finally makes an appearance.

Unfortunately, the news is not what I wanted hear.

Oh no!

Don't get me wrong, he's still on a road to recovery, but it looks like no one can visit him for the time being.

Stupid hospital rules!

He's being transferred to the ICU and then they'll move him into his own room.

That doesn't sit well with my mother, understandably so. She pulls some strings so at the very least she can be with him all night until he wakes up.

If I am in an emotional tailspin, I can only imagine what she is feeling. To think that she was contemplating splitting up with my dad is still mind boggling to me. I know she didn't really want that and I'm sure she was trying to shock him into action, but that still can't take back what she said.

They were clearly in a much worse place than I ever thought.

How could I not know?

Maybe I didn't want to know.

That's a lot more likely.

I should have…

No!

I already said no!

There will be no thoughts in my head besides what I can do to help.

I can sense that Ashley is trying to get me to look at her.

Nothing's changed.

I can't.

She'll know if I look.

She'll see right through me.

Ashley squeezes my hand but it feels like it's squeezing my throat.

I swallow hard.

I try to take a few deep breaths.

And I keep my eyes trained on the wall ahead of me and not on swell of emotion that's threatening to emerge at the worst possible time.

I feel weak.

I want to feel strong.

It would be so much easier to be strong if I could go back to feeling numb and detached from everything.

"You guys should go home," my mom suggests to the six of us. "I'll let you know when your dad wakes up and when you can come by to see him."

None of us think that's a good idea.

She shouldn't be alone.

"I'll be fine," she insists when we start to murmur our disagreement. "All of you have been amazing, but you need to rest."

"What about you?" I ask out of genuine concern. My issues aside, it's not like she's had any sleep either and I can only imagine how wrecked my mother must be feeling.

Although my mother's eyes are red and her face shows the events of the past number of hours, there's something in the way that she's looking at me that makes me feel just a bit better. "Don't worry about me." There's a resolve in her voice that cannot be missed. "I promise to call you all the minute he's ready for visitors. Ok?"

I glance at everyone, and while I'm fairly certain none of them like the idea any better than I do, who are we to disagree with what my mom wants?

More hugging takes place before my mom follows a nurse out the door. That leaves the six of us to say our good-byes to each other, with promises of phone calls and meeting up later to come back to the hospital.

Jessie and Melissa leave first, followed closely by Glen, with Aiden in tow. I'm not sure if this means anything for their relationship and now wouldn't even be the time for that kind of decision. What I do know is that Glen needs someone right now and it would appear Aiden is willing to be that someone.

In the short term anyway.

That leaves me alone with Ashley and the giant elephant in the room that I refuse to acknowledge.

"Let's head home," Ashley says while ignoring the many questions I'm sure she must have. I can't tell you why she is playing along with my game of pretending everything is ok, but I can you that I'm grateful she is.

By the time we pull into our driveway it's close to four in the morning.

Everything is so dark.

Everything is so quiet.

It all seems so peaceful.

Except for the battle raging inside me.

The noise of that is drowning almost everything else out.

I step out of the car with a sense of dread that is increasing with every step I take towards our home. I don't know what I'm expecting when I open that door, I just know it's going to be something bad.

My heart starts pounding the closer I am to being inside the house.

I have a certain flair for the dramatic, there's no denying that, but I don't think my imagination is the cause of what I'm feeling.

I almost call out when Ashley goes to open the door to let us in to stop her. I don't though and that's a good thing because I don't want her to worry that I'm losing my mind.

I'm already doing that enough on my own.

I inhale sharply right before I follow her inside as I prepare for the worst.

This isn't going to be pretty.

When I open my eyes and take a look around, I can't figure out what I'm seeing.

Everything looks the same.

The exact same.

Nothing's changed.

I don't get it.

How is it all the same?

That's not possible.

I ignore the confusion I'm causing in Ashley and make my way to the kitchen.

I'm met with a similar scene.

Nothing looks out of place.

The kitchen has been cleaned and you couldn't even tell that it was left in a big mess.

How?

How can it all look normal?

If someone came into this house right now they would never be able to tell what happened earlier today.

They'd never know the chaos that I left in.

Everything is in its rightful place that they'd never know how close we came to having the world changed in a split second.

I could have returned from the hospital…

They'd never know how close…

Oh god!

I can't be here.

The walls feel like they're closing in on me and that suffocating feeling I got a taste of earlier is hitting me full force.

Oh god!

I rush up the stairs without acknowledging Ashley calling after me.

Oh god!

I can't.

That didn't happen!

That couldn't happen.

I couldn't have come so close to losing…

Oh god!

Make it stop!

Make all of it stop!

"Spencer?" Ashley says my name more forcibly than she's said it all day. "What is going on?"

I'm frantic as I move around our bedroom. "Nothing! Nothing is going on!" I should probably keep my voice down because Kyla must be here, somewhere, sleeping.

There's a lot of things I should have probably done, but that's neither here nor there.

She steps in front of me, but that only increases the anxiousness I'm experiencing. "Can you please stop for a minute and tell me what you're doing?"

"No, I can't," I reply tersely. I don't mean to! "Can you please get out of my way, I need to get a few things."

"Spencer, stop," Ashley puts her hands on my shoulders, but I flinch and she moves back. "Please tell me what's going on."

I almost relent because of how worried she sounds, but I know that I can't.

"It's not that big a deal," I am trying my best to remain calm, steady and strong. "I thought I'd blow of some steam and go for a run."

That's not a bad idea at all.

I need to run.

Need to move.

I can't stay here.

I can't stand still.

It's not forever.

I'm not leaving forever.

"What are you talking about?" Ashley asks, sounding exasperated. "It's the middle of the night and after everything…"

"It's almost the morning!" I cut in before Ashley can finish what she was going to say. "I'll be back in like an hour or so."

The longer Ashley keeps me here, the closer I get to the edge.

"I'm not worried about that," Ashley sighs. She doesn't yell or anything though, instead she goes the other way. "Please tell me what is going on. I can help, trust me."

Oh god!

This isn't going to end well.

Despite how wrong I know it is, I side step Ashley so I can get my workout clothes. Unfortunately, I can't find what I'm looking for and that causes me to panic even more.

Oh god!

Why can nothing go right?

Fuck!

I start opening drawer after drawer in the hopes that I will be able to locate what I'm looking for.

"Spencer!" Ashley exclaims, but it's no use. "Please, stop!"

I'm too far gone.

And not in the right frame of mind to listen to her.

Or anyone.

I'm too scared.

Too freaked out.

"Leave me alone," I order with my back still to Ashley. I continue flinging my clothes all over the place and I'll be honest, I can't even remember what I was looking for.

"I won't run," Ashley says, confusing me. "I promise."

"What are you talking about?" I can't figure out what she means. "You've never run with me once, why would you start now?"

"Look at me," Ashley requests and the way she says it makes me do just that. I turn around, seated in a sea of my clothes even though I really don't want to. "No matter what you tell me, I won't run."

I'm still lost.

Run where?

Now she's the one not making any sense.

But I can feel something starting to crumble.

Oh god!

I'm in trouble.

"I'm fine!" I shriek, clearly not fine in the least. "I just need to be alone for a bit."

Maybe that will work.

Get Ashley to back off a little.

Ashley kneels down on the floor and she gently takes the clothes out of my hands she can take hold of them with hers. "I'm here for you, Spence, I promise." Her eyes are getting a bit moist and that breaks me just a little more. "I know I've shut down and run when things have gotten hard, but I won't do that now."

Oh god!

Somebody please get her to stop!

I can't handle this.

"I'm here for you, always," Ashley pledges and I feel my bottom lip start to tremble.

Is it because of her sweet promise?

Is it because I feel guilty for making Ashley believe that I doubt her ability to be the rock of support that she's proven to be?

I'm fairly sure the answer is neither of those things.

"Please let me help," Ashley pleads, her voice no more than a whisper. "Let me be here for you."

"Stop," It's my turn to beg. "Please stop."

Oh god!

There's no point in trying to put up a fight anymore.

I'm not strong enough.

I am weak.

"Let me help you," Ashley repeats causing the last of my barriers to fall.

I almost lost my dad.

I came so close and what would I have done if he didn't make it?

I refused to deal with that at the hospital because I would have broken down in a big way. Then who would I have been able to help?

Nobody.

All these emotions are overwhelming me and there's nothing I can do to stop them.

I burst into tears; my sobbing is uncontrollable.

I fall into Ashley's arms because that _is_ actually where I want to be.

She holds me tightly even as my crying intensifies.

Just like I need her to.


	31. Chapter 31

**A/N Sorry this chapter is a few days late - work got crazy busy for me. I will be doing my best to keep updating once a week. Randomness that might interest only me: with this being chapter 31 and _Today I Met... _being 69 chapters - that makes this chapter 100 of Team Spashley (I'm not counting Jessie's little story because then my numbers wouldn't add up as nicely). In conclusion, thanks for letting me write for characters I love for this long - much appreciated! **

Chapter 31

I feel like I've been run over by a truck.

Multiple times.

And then a few more times after that.

And I think there might have been a second truck that ran over me just for the fun of it.

Ugh.

Seriously, just ugh.

Also, did I mention that my head is pounding like a mother fucker?

Oh, I'm sorry!

I tend to swear a little when I'm cranky. I don't know if you've ever noticed that before?

Fuck me.

I feel like absolute shit.

It doesn't help that I've been through the ringer and only had a few hours of sleep.

Ugh.

My head is pounding and I can't even open my eyes. I'm pretty sure I couldn't handle any kind of light whatsoever.

This sucks.

Ugh.

You know what else sucks?

Ashley isn't in bed to give me sweet cuddles and make the pain go away.

I know this because when I woke up, I blindly felt around for her, meekly called her name and then tried feeling around for her again. I had a minor panic attack when my poor mind came into focus about my dad but I know enough that if there was a call or some kind of update, I'd have woken up or Ashley would be here right now.

Ugh.

My brain can't handle all these thoughts.

Not only do I feel like I've been on the losing end of an encounter with two trucks, but I also feel like I've gone twelve rounds with a really big and mean boxer.

I guess this would be what you would call an emotional hangover.

The alcohol kind are so much easier to deal with.

Ugh.

I should make an attempt to get up.

To find Ashley.

To tell her that I love her.

That I love her so much.

That I don't want to imagine what my life would be like without her.

That her support means more than words can ever express.

That I love her.

I say that a lot to her, but after what happened yesterday I have this need to tell her over and over again. I just don't want her to ever doubt what I feel and how I can't wait to spend my life with her.

You never know what can happen.

Ugh.

I can't handle where those kind of thoughts might lead.

They're way too complex and heavy for me to handle at this moment.

Plus, I'm pretty sure they'd cause me to freak out and I already did that enough last night.

Or very early this morning as it was.

Luckily I have the world's most amazing fiancé – I'm never going to tire of calling Ashley that – who held me until the tears stopped and long afterwards.

She let me unload everything that I'd been holding in and then some. She took me to bed and then she continued holding me, whispering words of love, until I finally fell asleep.

God, she's amazing.

I'm getting a little choked up right now just thinking about it.

Oh boy, now would not be a good time for me to watch any kind of tear jerker movie. I'd probably have a nervous breakdown.

One nervous breakdown is enough, thank you very much!

After a few minutes of pep talking myself, I somehow find the strength to get up.

Ugh.

I think I got up too fast.

I look at my clock.

Ugh.

It's actually later than I thought and yet I still feel like crap.

I'm just about to make an attempt to actually get out from under the covers when I notice that someone has left a glass of water beside the bed.

Along with two pills.

Aw!

Ashley is just perfect!

Seriously!

I really do think I'm going to start crying. That's what her thoughtfulness and general abundance of sweetness is doing to me.

I down the pills and lie back down until they start to kick in.

When the overwhelming pounding has dulled somewhat, I do actually get up, feeling just a tad better.

It's not much, but it's a definite improvement.

Once I have had the chance to put on a robe, brush my hair and make myself presentable, I head downstairs. It didn't escape my notice that when I checked myself out in the mirror, there were huge dark circles under my eyes.

Oh well.

Nothing I can really do about that.

I make it downstairs in once piece and just when I'm about to enter the kitchen, I hear voices.

No, not the ones in my head…the real kind.

"I'm so glad he's going to be ok," Kyla says quietly. "I was really worried."

"Me too," Ashley replies. It's impossible to miss how tired she sounds. "Me too."

"I haven't known them for that long, but they opened their home to me and…"Kyla's voice trails off and I wonder whether I should even be eavesdropping. On the other hand, the room has just started to spin so I need a few seconds to compose myself. "The Carlins are just such nice people."

"You don't have to tell me that," Ashley agrees.

Kyla seems to be doing something in the kitchen because she's making a lot of noise,but I'm too worried that I'm very close to throwing up to try to figure out what's going on.

Hey, maybe I'm pregnant!

Hmmmmm…

Perhaps things have taken a turn for the better if I can make that kind of joke at a time like this.

"How's Spencer?" Kyla asks sweetly.

"Things were rough when we got home last night," Ashley explains without going into too much detail. "I hope she's doing better today."

"Well, she has you, so I'm sure you'll be there to help her," Kyla correctly observes.

Aw!

I'm getting all mushy inside!

Although that could be the nauseas sensation that I'm currently fighting.

"I hope I can help," Ashley sighs. "I wish I could take this all away and make it better for her. I hate seeing Spencer in pain."

Aw!

How is she so sweet?

I want to announce my presence, but I'm starting to tear up and I don't want Ashley to be even more worried about me than she is already. I just need to compose myself a little and then I'll let her know that I'm awake.

And crazy in love with her.

Can't forget that part.

The two of them continue doing whatever it is that they're doing as I work on bottling my emotions back up.

What?

It wasn't a disaster last time I tried to do that!

It wasn't!

Ok, it was, but that…

Boo!

Hiss!

Stop making me feel bad!

"I…uh…Kyla…uh…"Ashley sounds really weird all of a sudden and I have no clue why. Everything goes silent and my heart starts to race. "I know I don't say this enough, but, uh, I really just…" Ashley pauses a second time as everything seems to stop. "What I want to say is…I'm really glad you're here…and…uh…fuck…."

Kyla chuckles and it makes me want to hit her really hard. Ashley's trying to have a moment with her and she's laughing in her face?

That bitch!

Why I never…

"Aw, Ash, are you trying to say you care about me?" Kyla teases rudely.

How could she be acting this way at a time like this?

"Because I really care about you as well," Kyla continues much to my delight. I'd hate to have to get violent this morning. "And I'm really glad that you're my sister."

Aw!

She's so sweet too!

Not as sweet as Ashley though.

Sorry, Kyla, that's just the facts.

"And I'm really glad that I'm getting a chance to know you and have a relationship with you." Kyla finishes, turning me into a big puddle of feelings.

So many feelings!

Tears are welling up in my eyes and I don't think I can stop them.

I enter the kitchen just in time to see Ashley give her sister a really big smile and then the two of them embrace.

Aw!

Aw personified!

This is just amazing!

I know the two of them have been growing close but this moment is something special.

And I got to be a part of it.

"Oh you two!" I manage to get out before I charge the Davies sisters and wrap my arms around them.

I can only imagine the looks that are being exchanged as I latch on to Ashley and Kyla while sobbing somewhat hysterically.

It's not my fault!

They're just that gosh darn adorable!

Gosh darn?

Where the fuck did that come from?

I have no idea.

"You ok?" Ashley asks after Kyla has managed to disengage from our group hug so just me and Ashley are left.

I nod furiously into Ashley's shoulder because I'm still verklempt.

"They're happy tears, I swear," I assure my wonderful girl when I'm able to talk. I don't want to unnecessarily work her into a tizzy. "The two of you are so cute together."

My comment causes Kyla to give me a wide smile and it causes Ashley to mumble something under her breath.

"I made pancakes if you're interested," Kyla tells me once my tears have subsided to the occasional sniffle. "I've been told they're pretty good."

I walk over to our kitchen table and take a seat. "That's really sweet but I'm not that hungry."

Plus my legs are still a little wobbly.

And my mentality somewhat shaky.

"You need to eat," Ashley tells me while giving a look that says don't argue with me. "Please."

Well, I can't exactly refuse when she's giving me those puppy eyes of hers.

They're very dangerous.

"Pancakes it is," I reply, giving in. "Plus a really big cup of coffee."

That is essential.

Especially if I'm expected to function at a somewhat normal level today.

"Already on it," Ashley says before heading over to our world class coffee maker.

She's perfect.

I don't care if I'm biased, that doesn't make her perfection any less true.

And if you had any doubts, the kiss I get on top of my head, along with a giant mug of java, should be more than enough proof.

I rest my case.

Our breakfast is eaten mostly in silence and even though I kind have to force Kyla's wonderful pancakes down, I still appreciate the thoughtfulness of her gesture.

I'm almost done with my food when I notice something peculiar.

I eat my pancakes one at a time.

But Ashley and Kyla both stacked three on top of each other before dousing them in maple syrup.

Aw!

They eat their pancakes the same way!

Aw!

I think I'm going to cry again.

I can't help myself!

They need stop being utterly delightful.

Kyla finishes her last bit of food and then she turns to me. "I was thinking, and you can say no, but I figured it might be nice, if you know…."

Aw!

They even ramble the same!

Somebody hold me!

And by somebody I of course mean the gorgeous brunette to my left!

"Well, I figured you were going to be at the hospital most of the day," Kyla continues to talk without getting to the point. "Maybe if you and Ash took me to the grocery store, you could drop me off at your parent's and I could cook a few meals for them and maybe clean up a bit."

Oh my…

That's just…

"Not that I mean their house is dirty or anything, but I just want to help out anyway I can, you know," Kyla finishes, blushing slightly.

Poor Kyla.

She has no idea what she's just done.

Before I can be stopped, I launch myself out of my chair and at an unsuspecting Kyla. I fling my arms around her and then I begin hysterically crying.

"I think that's the best idea I've ever heard," I manage to get out in between choked sobbing. "Thank you so much."

"Uh, you're welcome," Kyla replies as she pats my back. "It's not that big a deal."

I shake my head furiously in disagreement. "Yes, it really is."

"I'll take it from here," Ashley tells Kyla before she manages to disengage me from her sister's arms. "Go get ready."

Kyla hightails it from the kitchen, probably scared out of her mind at my behavior, and leaves Ashley to be the one to hug me.

And believe me, that's not a complaint.

She doesn't make fun of me.

Or my outburst.

Instead I just get her love and soft kisses on the side of my head.

See…perfection.

God, I love her.

* * *

I'm nervous.

Really nervous.

On the bright side, my state of mind seems to be a lot calmer.

That's what a few Xanax will do for you.

Kidding!

I would never!

I don't feel close to tears, but I am uneasy.

I'm about to see my dad and while that makes me unbelievably happy, I'm still nervous.

We dropped Kyla at my parent's house on the way to the hospital and we'll pick her up on our way home. I feel kind of bad that her L.A. plans have been derailed by what happened, but I can tell that she doesn't see it that way.

At all.

She's a good one.

Just like her sister.

Like my Ashley.

My Ashley that hasn't left my side all day.

My Ashley that is holding my hand as we make our way inside.

My Ashley that seems to know my mood is more anxious than earlier and instead of questioning me on why, she just gives me her support.

My Ashley that I know is spending all her time trying to make sure that I'm ok.

I better stop gushing over her in mind before I get all weepy again.

That wasn't pretty.

We got the call a few hours ago from my mom that we could come by this afternoon to see my dad. It hasn't been easy just sitting around waiting for that kind of call. But when I heard my mom's voice and how light she sounded compared to yesterday, I knew the waiting was worth it.

The waiting is worth it if the end result is good news.

When we find my dad's room, I see that Melissa and Jessie are already here and so are Aiden and Glen.

None of us aren't looking our best, but given the circumstances that's not a surprise. As expected, we greet each other with lots of hugs and "good to see you" comments are common.

I think I've given and received more hugs over the last twenty four hours than the last few months combined.

I find out from Jessie that my mom wants to talk to us before we go in.

That leaves us to mill around while we wait.

More waiting.

I shouldn't be surprised.

This whole experience has been a massive amount of waiting mixed in with intense moments that have caused emotional havoc to a lot of people.

It's exhausting!

Finally my mom emerges from my dad's room.

She's dressed in scrubs and while she also looks tired, she also looks very happy.

That eases my anxiety somewhat.

But I still have no idea what to expect when I see my dad.

"Thank you all for coming," my mom says to us after she's given us even more hugs. "Arthur and I really appreciate all of your support so much."

I can't help but do a little of dance of joy in my head because my mom is talking about her and my dad as a "we".

That has to be a great sign.

"But there are some ground rules that I need you to follow." She's using her mom tone that I know very well. She definitely has my attention and everyone else's as well. "First of all, because it hasn't been that long since the surgery, the doctor has asked that you only visit Arthur one at a time."

My stomach clenches a little because I really wanted Ashley with me when I saw him.

I'm not going to protest though.

My mom has been through enough and this is probably one of those life lessons things that I'm supposed to do on my own.

Stupid maturity!

Where did you come from?

The six of us let her know we understand and then my mom continues.

"Secondly, there will be absolutely no talk of work in any way, shape or capacity," my mom says firmly. "Do I make myself clear?"

I know she's directing that rule more to Jessie and Glen, but that doesn't stop her from getting six enthusiastic nods of the head.

Now she's using her mom don't-mess-with-me tone.

I know that very well too!

"Finally, as hard as it may be, you won't have that much time with him," My mom tells us sympathetically. "I'm sorry, but he really does need his rest and you should have plenty of time to be with him once he's a bit stronger."

Thank god!

After much discussion, it's decided that Glen will go first and then it will be my turn.

Aiden squeezes his shoulder before he goes in.

I wonder if the two of them spent the night together.

Hey!

Not like that!

Because ew, and also, I'm pretty sure sex is the farthest thing from Glen's mind right now.

I know it's the farthest thing from mine.

Which, color me surprised!

I didn't even think that was possible.

My mom has gone to talk to my dad's nurses so the five of us find a seat and then we wait.

Shocker!

I know.

Glen comes finds us a few minutes later.

His eyes look like he's been crying.

Aw!

Yes, he can be a jerk, but he's also my brother and I love him dearly.

I will make sure I tell him that before I leave the hospital.

I feel this need to tell everyone in my life that know.

Funny how near tragedy can have that affect on you.

Ashley walks me to my dad's room and I'm pretty sure she can see how anxious I am. I take a few deep breaths before I open the door.

When I see my dad it takes all my willpower not to gasp.

He looks so…

So…

Weak.

Hooked up to all these machines.

Machines that frankly give me the willies.

Oh god!

How is this the same man that I always saw as invincible?

Most of us will have to deal with our parent's getting older at some point. It's the natural order of life, or so they say, but the reality of facing that situation is awful.

He's always taken care of me and been such a person of strength to me.

I refuse to let him see that his appearance is upsetting me because that would be selfish. Instead I put on my bravest smile and walk over to his bed.

"Hi, dad," I say softly, my voice wavering just a bit.

My dad gives me the warmest of smiles, "Hi, sweetheart, thanks for coming."

I take a seat beside him before taking his hand. "You're lucky I could fit you in my busy schedule; I did have lots of places to go and people to see."

My joking around is just the way I deal with things.

I can't help it.

My dad squeezes my hand and lets out a bit of chuckle. "I am lucky."

I don't know how he can say that when he almost died.

That still sounds awful.

Even in my head.

"Your mom told me how amazing you were last night," he says and I suddenly don't feel like joking around anymore. "I'm so proud of you, Spence."

I shake my head. "You shouldn't be."

I'm not looking to start a fight, especially now, it's just how I feel.

I don't deserve for him to be proud of me.

"Don't be silly," my dad replies seriously. "I've always been so proud that you're my daughter and I love you very much."

Oh god!

I just can't accept what he's saying.

"I'm so sorry," I tell him and even though I didn't want to, I start to cry. Again. "I could have stopped it. I'm so sorry."

"Spence, what are you talking about?" he asks, very concerned.

Oh great!

I'm upsetting a guy that just had a heart attack and major surgery.

Good on me!

Not!

"I was at your office yesterday, but I left before…before…" I can't say it and the words get stuck in my throat. "If I would have stayed maybe…maybe…I could have…"

I could have stopped it.

I could have stopped this whole nightmare from happening.

But I left.

Because I was embarrassed by my freaking out on Madison and because I knew didn't want to have that difficult conversation with my dad.

Oh god!

I'm so selfish.

So fucking selfish!

The guilt I'm feeling is overwhelming.

I let everybody down.

How can my dad shouldn't say he's proud of me when I'm such a disappointment?

"Sweetheart, stop," my dad gently orders.

I'm sure me blubbering my guilty confession to my dad is breaking one of my mom's rules, but I can't help myself.

I can't keep my feelings of regret in.

"Spence, look at me." He releases my hand and tilts my head upwards. "You're not to blame here."

That's not true!

If only…

"I didn't know you were at the office today, but I'm glad you were gone before I collapsed." My dad's voice is now starting to shake. "I wouldn't have wanted you to see me like that. Besides you couldn't have stopped my heart attack, unfortunately that was a long time coming on my part and I'm the one who should be apologizing to you."

I guess that kind of makes sense.

I still feel guilty though.

"Promise me you'll stop beating yourself up over this," he requests and I don't think I can really say no to him.

Not under these circumstances anyway.

"I promise," I reply and I really will try.

It's not going to be easy.

And they won't be erased just because I want them to.

But I don't think blame is going to be useful right now.

"I love you so much, Spence," he says and now he's tearing up too.

Not in a bad way.

"I love you too, dad," I tell him because I really, really do.

He's the best.

The absolute best.

And as I lay my head on his chest, hearing his steady heartbeat, I get a sense for the first time, that really and truly, everything is going to be ok.


	32. Chapter 32

**A/N I know I haven't been the best at keeping up with my once a week update goal. In my defense this time I was delayed because I was looking after two little ones last week and they wore me out! Thanks as always for reading/reviewing. **

Chapter 32

Perhaps I jumped the gun on the whole "everything is going to be ok" statement I made.

I say this because two days have passed since I first visited my dad in the hospital and things are actually not ok.

He hasn't had a relapse or another heart attack.

Thank god!

But something still doesn't feel quite right.

And I don't know what to do about that.

Ashley and I have spent quite a bit of time at the hospital as expected. We've hung out a lot with my dad as well as the whole family.

Minus Clay, unfortunately.

He hasn't been able to arrange a trip home yet, but hopefully that changes soon

My dad's stable enough that he's been moved into a private room. It's much nicer when we can all gather together instead of individually, but we've also made sure to take turns one-on-one with him because that's important as well.

Maybe I'm still dealing with the guilt I'm carrying around for leaving that awful day before my dad collapsed. Even though he says I shouldn't, I can't help but wonder "what if". It doesn't make a lot of logical sense and I really don't think I could have changed anything that happened, but I do feel bad.

I'm not sure that's where my sense of uneasiness is coming from however.

On the positive side, Ashley has been amazing.

Like I had any doubt!

I really didn't.

I know she thought that's why I didn't want to open up to her before.

Ashley might have a tendency to flee when she's dealing with something about her, but when it comes to my issues, she's always been there for me.

Always.

Even though I always knew she'd be there for me no matter what, I guess having her prove it in a time of crisis can't be a bad thing. I wish she didn't have her moments of self doubt, but, hey, who the hell am I to judge that!

Talk about the pot calling the kettle black!

Except our kettle is green so not really sure that expression applies to us.

Anyway...

I've spoken with Ashley about how I blame myself for my dad, as well as my emotions in general, without having another nervous breakdown.

Score!

And go me!

I've also been on the receiving end of a lot of Ashley cuddles.

She's made sure that I'm well taken care of.

Kyla has pitched in too.

Not with the cuddling part!

That's reserved for only one woman thank you very much!

But she has been another great source of support.

So, to sum up where we stand: my dad is expected to make a full recovery, we've been spending time with the whole family and Kyla, there's been lots of cuddling and I've opened up to Ashley about my feelings.

All good things.

Great things.

Positive things.

Yet this kernel of something still being askew persists.

And I haven't a clue why!

Ugh!

Frustration, thy name is Spencer Carlin!

Ashley's gone to pick up dinner for us while I veg on the couch watching a _Real Housewives of New York City_ marathon.

What?

Don't judge!

It's highly entertaining!

It is!

"Hey," Kyla says as she enters the den. She's been outside using the pool and taking advantage of the wonderful weather that living in California brings. She must have come in to the house earlier and I didn't hear her. She's changed out of her bikini and into a pair of sweats. "Ash, back?"

I shake my head as I stop my show.

Thank you DVR for allowing me to pause live TV!

What?

It was just an observation.

Kyla sits down but when she sees what I've watching she rolls her eyes very dramatically.

Aw!

Another thing where she's just like Ashley!

She can't stand this show either.

Snobs!

Whatever.

"Hopefully soon, I'm starved." I reply once I'm done defending my taste in TV shows to myself.

"Me too," Kyla concurs while rubbing her stomach. "How's your dad doing today? Still well I hope."

"He is!" I answer enthusiastically. "Both my parents want me both to thank you for all that you've done, they're really grateful."

As am I.

But I've told her that already.

Kyla brushes off the compliment like it's no big deal.

Isn't it, though?

She hardly knows us.

We're not related to her.

There's no reason that Kyla has to be so giving, except that she's a generous person who likes to help.

I wonder if she's bored.

The last few days can't have been that fun for her. She never really even got to enjoy the excitement of her trip with Ashley to New York before all hell broke loose. And she hasn't even shown the slightest hint that she's bothered by things being put on hold.

Of course there are bigger things that have been going on, but that doesn't mean I can't feel bad about it.

"I'm sorry about all this," I tell Kyla, causing her to look confused. I guess I had better explain myself better. "I know you had a great time in New York and now everything is in limbo."

Kyla furrows her brow even more as if what I just said didn't make any sense to her.

That's odd.

"Yeah, you should be sorry," Kyla says, but I think she's being a bit sarcastic. "You only opened your home to me just like your mom did, hung out with me when Ashley wouldn't acknowledge my existence, are one of the main reasons she's even made an effort in our relationship - at least in the beginning - and you let her take me across the country to help with my music career." She pauses to take a breath, "you really are a selfish bitch, Spencer."

I can't help but laugh because when she puts it like that my apology does sound unnecessary.

"Ok, ok, you made your point," It's now my turn to roll my eyes, "But..."

"No buts," Kyla cuts in forcefully. She hesitates before continuing, "When I was younger I would often wish that I wasn't an only child, it could get quite lonely." Ashley has said that exact same thing to me before. "Meeting and getting to know Ashley has given me the sibling I always wanted..."

She pauses again and while I would normally take that as a cue to talk, I get the feeling I shouldn't say anything quite yet.

All of a sudden Kyla looks bashful, "And I kind of feel that I can think of you the same way." The end of her sentence comes out almost as a squeak and now she is looking anywhere that isn't at me.

Aw!

That's so nice of her to say!

Aw!

What an amazing compliment!

Aw!

I'm so touched!

I've grown really fond of Kyla and it's nice she feels that way about me too.

Aw!

I'm about to tell her that when...

Uh oh!

This can't be good!

Tears spring to my eyes and I can't do anything to stop the rush of emotions that is about to come tumbling out of me.

Not again!

Kyla barely has time to react before I haul her out of her seat so I can give her a giant hug.

"That's the sweetest thing anybody has ever said to me," I cry out as I start sobbing hysterically.

I latch onto poor Kyla and I can only hope I'm not hurting her too much.

"What happened?" Ashley asks in panic when she arrives on this awkward scene. I guess she's back from getting dinner. "I wasn't gone that long!"

I want to tell her I'm ok but I'm not really able to form words right this second.

"I don't know!" Kyla replies, sounding flustered. "All I did was tell Spencer that I was starting to think of her as family!"

Poor girl.

She only had the best of intentions.

I hear Ashley doing something and then she once again takes over for Kyla because I've turned into a blubbering mess.

I hope I'm not like this for much longer.

And I'm pretty sure Ashley and Kyla feel the exact same way.

* * *

You know that things are not right with the world when Ashley is driving the Spencermobile.

No one has ever really touched her besides me because she's my special girl!

The car, I mean.

But Ashley's Porsche is getting serviced and she doesn't think I'm stable enough to drive right now.

Not that she said that in so many words, but I got the hint.

Hmph!

She's likely right, but still!

I have my dignity!

I had to bite my tongue very hard on the drive to the hospital with all her crazy driving. I love Ashley dearly but if she ever did anything to my car, it might mean the end of us.

Kidding!

Mostly!

I give her a toothy grin when we get out of the car to let her know that I'm fine with her awful driving skills, but I'm not convinced I was able to fake my way out of my true feelings. I know this because Ashley gives me a look that says "get over yourself and your weird car obsession."

Hmph!

Instead of fighting over something so silly though, I take Ashley's hand in my own. The feeling that gives me will never get old.

Never!

I'm about to apologize again for my meltdown yesterday when out of nowhere Ashley stops walking and her whole body tenses up. When I follow her line of sight I realize why.

Paparazzi.

Boo!

Hiss!

They suck!

Well, not all of them but I was relieved that since my dad's been in the hospital we haven't had to deal with the headache that they can cause.

Ugh!

It's not like I don't know how to handle them, I am a professional after all. It was just nice to have time these last few days without worrying about their presence.

Oh well.

It's not like we were going to avoid them forever.

And it's not like I don't enjoy the life that Ashley and I have together.

If dealing with the paparazzi is something that life together brings, then so be it.

I give Ashley a reassuring smile because even though we've been dealing with them the last 2 years or so, she still isn't quite the calm, collected, level headed person I am in situations like these.

What?

It's true!

All I need to do is turn on Professional Spencer and we're all good.

Ashley is the one that tends to lose her cool so thankfully I'm here to take care of her.

"Just ignore them," I whisper before I lead us towards the hospital.

She gives me a small nod of the head to let me know she's all good.

At least I hope that's what it means.

The closer we get to the entrance, the closer the group that's gathered to greet us gets.

It doesn't seem to be that big a group of photographers and that makes me feel slightly better. You should have seen how crazy things were after we just got engaged.

It was unbelievable!

And now that things have calmed down since Kyla's arrival it hasn't been too bad.

Besides, it's not like my dad is famous so I'm sure this is going to be no big deal.

Boo!

Hiss!

Did I just jinx us?

The cameras start going off but neither of us pay attention to them or the questions that are hurled in our direction. None of them seem out of the ordinary or anything I need to worry about and that makes me feel slightly more at ease.

Whew!

"Spencer, Spencer, any comment on the pictures from Ashley's trip to New York?"

Oh fuck!

Fuck me!

Did I say fuck already?

I know the voice that question belongs to.

Unfortunately too well.

He's one the of the worst!

Seriously?

I have to deal with this asshole now?

Argh!

Ashley and I have barely discussed her trip to New York, but I know I have nothing to be worried about when it comes to trusting her and I also know that whatever so called "exclusive" this guy has, he's only here to cause trouble.

"Ashley, do you have anything to say about what happened? Want to give your side of the story?"

"Stay calm," I urge my love. She's squeezing the shit out of my hand and I don't care.

As long as it's my hand and not that guy's throat.

We try to keep moving but the guy starts to cut in front of us, and the rest of the paparazzi, smelling blood I assume, makes that more difficult.

I can see Ashley clenching her jaw, but she keeps quiet.

So far, so good.

We put our heads down and keep moving even though that's proving increasingly difficult.

"Come on Spencer, just give me one comment," the jerkface pleads like a giant jerkface. "Did Ashley tell you about what happened or was she hoping she wouldn't get caught?"

Motherfucker!

This guy won't give up!

I don't even care about what he thinks Ashley did. All I want to do is get us out of here before a big commotion is caused.

Boo!

Hiss!

I'm sad!

But mostly mad!

"You can't avoid my questions forever," the douchebag says so fucking smugly. "Sooner or later one of you is going to have to make a comment about Ashley hooking up with her ex."

If I didn't know my soon-to-be-wife so well and didn't trust her completely perhaps this guy would get to me. Especially in my emotionally fragile state. For him to even bring this up at a time when our family has been through a giant scare is so classless.

I get that everyone has a job to do, but there should be lines that aren't crossed.

Whatever.

I'm not even going to start a philosophical discussion on celebrity culture.

I don't care about that right now.

I just want this guy to shut the fuck up, I want to tell Ashley that I love her and I want to see my dad.

That's it.

Besides, what this mofo doesn't get is that there are no secrets between Ashley and me. Both as her fiancé and her publicist.

No, she didn't cheat on me!

That's blasphemous!

But she was at an industry event with a former flame of hers from her New York days. He's not lying about that.

Just because Ashley was in the closet before we met, doesn't mean she didn't have a past. And sure there was some jealousy on my part when I first met Lindsay. I think that's only natural.

But I've actually gotten to know her really well since we first got introduced.

She's even stayed at our house.

No!

Not like that!

It's true, Ashley and her did spend a lot of time together at the party, including some drunk dancing. My girl sent me pictures to show me what a goof she was being.

But that's all that happened.

I know this!

So I can see why it might look bad to someone else, but Ashley is so loyal to me it's not even funny.

I really can't stand when people try to besmirch her good name!

Side note: I really like the word besmirch.

What?

It was just an observation.

Without warning, numbnuts shoves a photo of Ashley and Lindsay together in my face. "One comment, Spencer, that's all I'm looking for." He has such a big smirk on his stupid ugly face. "I mean, it's not like this should come as a surprise to you," he pauses dramatically because he's a giant fucktard, "you know what they say, like father, like daughter."

Oh.

Hell.

No.

Tell me that giant douche-nozzle did not just say that?

I just can't…

Rage isn't even a word I would use to describe what I'm feeling right now.

It goes beyond that.

Ashley doesn't deserve a comment like that and while maybe her dad did live a rockstar lifestyle, how dare he make that kind of remark at her expense!

I react instantly and without thought.

I look up and clock him right in the nose.

He goes stumbling backwards and then his stupid ass hits the concrete of the parking lot.

Ha ha!

And uh oh!

I shouldn't have done that!

It's not my fault!

In some ways I wish I was pregnant so at least my wacked out hormones could have been to blame for what I did.

I royally screwed up!

I know!

But they want after Ashley and her dad!

I saw red!

Oops!

Boo!

Hiss!

I'm going to be sued!

I think everyone is stunned into silence by what I did because nobody has reacted at all to my inappropriate but very satisfying punch.

I want to look at Ashley to see her reaction but I'm too scared. I'm the one that's supposed to navigate these situations carefully. I'm not the one that's supposed to make an already sticky situation worse.

Yikes!

"You crazy bitch!" The guy I just punched screams as blood comes out of his nose. "You're going to pay for this!" He starts laughing as he wipes the blood from his face. "You are _so_ going to pay for this."

Great!

I hope I can disconnect the TV in my dad's room before he has a chance to see this plastered all over the place.

He's going to freak out when he finds out what I did!

_Ay, Chihuahua! _

"I don't see how you falling is anyone's fault but your own," one of the other photographers remarks casually. "You're the one that wasn't watching where you were going."

My eyes go wide, but I smartly stay quiet.

At least I can do one thing right in this situation.

Feeling a little brave, I look over at Ashley and she appears to be just as surprised by the comment as I was.

"What the fuck are you talking about?" my victim asks in disbelief. "All of you saw her punch me! She fucking punched me and I'm going to sue the shit out of her and press charges."

Oh my god!

Charges!

I never even thought about that!

I can't go to prison!

Orange is a horrible color on me!

What the hell have I done?

I can't put my family through this when they've all been through enough already!

Ashley starts to say something, I'm sure in my defense, but the person who seems to be coming to my aide unexpectedly speaks up again. "I'm pretty sure if you ask anyone here, they're all going to say you tripped. Isn't that right?" He's addressing his fellow paparazzi and surprisingly, they all nod in agreement.

What the hell is going on?

I know the guy, Jim, that's standing up for me both from my relationship with Ashley and my former clients that I used to do publicity for. But we're certainly not friends and I can't figure out why he's doing this for me.

Jim then bends down and sticks his finger in that scum bucket's face. "And if you decide try to pursue anything against Spencer I'm pretty sure you're going to find it very difficult to continue working in this town."

He sounds like such a 40's gangster!

But also, yay!

I don't care if he sounds cheesy!

As long as Jim gets results!

The moron I slugged doesn't look pleased but he gets up and leaves without further incident. He is muttering something under his breath and I'm pretty sure he's still going to sell those pictures of Ashley and insinuate she was cheating on me.

Can't stop that story.

But at the very least, my momentary lapse in judgment won't be turned into an even bigger story that could cause a ton of problems.

The rest of the paparazzi disperse and I breathe a sigh of relief.

"Say hi to your dad for me," Jim says when it's just the three of us. "He's always been a great guy to work with and I was sorry to hear what happened to him."

"I will," I reply still in shock. I can't believe how lucky I just got. "And thank you so…"

"Don't mention it," Jim replies gruffly. "Just remember, you owe me."

He's clearly not one for sentimental moments and he is after all a businessman.

"I think that can be arranged," I assure him sincerely.

Not sure what kind of exclusive I'm going to give Jim, but it will be a good one.

Maybe a first picture of me and Ashley as a married couple.

That's got to be worth something.

Right?

* * *

Ow!

Ow!

Ow!

My hand fucking kills!

I now know why boxers where gloves.

Hitting someone is painful!

And not just for them.

My knuckles are all swollen and red.

My poor hand!

On the other hand – clever pun not intended - I am kind of impressed that I was able to knockdown a grown man with one punch. Even if that man is a sniveling weasel who deserved it.

On a retelling of the story I can say there were two hits that occurred.

Me hitting him.

And him hitting the floor.

Booyah!

Sorry, my adrenaline is making me a little giddy at the moment.

It also helps that Ashley isn't mad at me and thinks it's really sweet that I was defending her honor as well as her dad's.

She got ice for my hand and then kissed it all better.

That helped with the pain a little.

But it still hurts.

And also I have to figure out what to tell the family when they see my hand wrapped in the ice Ashley got for me. I better think of something good!

"How you doing, Slugger?" Ashley asks as she sits beside me. My dad is having a few tests done and my mom is with him so we're waiting until that's over before we see him. She's smirking at me but since she's Ashley, she's allowed.

I shoulder check her playfully, "How long are going to call me that?"

"Easy there tiger," Ashley replies while throwing her hands up like she's surrendering to me. "I don't want to get you all worked up again."

"Shut up!" I whine, but I'm not really upset. "You know, none of this would have happened if someone hadn't put themselves in compromising situation."

Ha!

Let's see her find fault with that logic.

Ashley has the good sense to look remorseful, but something tells me she isn't going to let this whole thing go that easily.

Boo!

Hiss!

I'm sad again!

"Excuse me, are you Ashley Davies?"

Shit!

My stomach tightens because I'm worried that someone has gotten wind of my super punching skills even though I thought that situation was all taken care of.

"Yes," Ashley answers the woman who is now in front of us with some trepidation. I think we're both thinking the same thing.

"I hate to bother you," the mystery woman says, looking apologetic. "And I would normally never approach you during what I'm sure is a difficult time for you…" she sits down and lowers her voice and it's then that I notice she's a nurse. "But I work in the children's ward here and I have this patient that I take care of that is just your biggest fan. I don't want to impose, but is there anyway when you have a moment or two, you could come by and say hi to her?"

"Absolutely," Ashley answers without hesitation. She visibly relaxes and so do I. Here I was all worried about myself when this woman's appearance had nothing to do with me. "Tell you what though, if you can wait a day, why don't I bring my guitar with me tomorrow and maybe I can play a few songs for her and anyone else who wants to listen."

Aw!

She's so amazing!

This is one of the many, many, many, many reasons that I can't wait to be Ashley's wife.

The nurse seems flabbergasted by Ashley's suggestion but recovers quickly enough to start discussing details about tomorrow and Ashley's impromptu concenrt.

As they talk I get a message from Glen and Jessie saying they won't be able to visit today because they're too tied up with things at the office.

Everyone there has been putting in a lot of hours to cover for my dad's absence.

And that's when it hits me.

What's been bothering me this whole time.

Everyone has been doing that except me.

As much as I talk about feeling guilty about my dad, there's something that I can be doing about it, but haven't been.

That all changes now though.

Spencer Carlin is once again going to be a working girl!

Whoa.

Wait.

That doesn't sound quite right.

Does it?


	33. Chapter 33

**A/N It's alive! It's alive! So here we are, back with this story again. I'm sorry it's been so long since I've updated but I'd rather my fic go on hiatus when I'm not feeling it, than post something I'm not happy with. My goal is to finish this (I know I've had the same goal before), and I have a really good idea of where I want to go. Hopefully you enjoy and thanks as always to those who read/leave feedback. You're awesome!**

* * *

Chapter 33

I'm nervous.

Really nervous.

I feel like it's my first day of school instead of my first day back at a company I worked at for many years. But this feels different. I really want to do a good job and contribute so I can help my family. I still feel guilty about my dad's heart attack, no matter what he says. I'm hoping that this will in some way make things up to everyone, even if he tells me that none of what happened is my fault.

I actually got up before my alarm clock went off this morning.

Go me!

I have no idea how long I will be working at my dad's company, but I know that I will stay for however long I'm needed. Ashley gave me her full support when I told her my idea – of course she did – and Jessie and Glen were beyond grateful when I offered my services.

I'm not sure if my dad knows about my return because we're still not allowed to discuss business with him.

Good!

He needs to disconnect and I am fairly certain that he's obeying all of my mother's orders, even if he doesn't necessarily agree with them.

"Wow."

I turn around to find my finance leaning against our doorframe, giving me the once over. "You like?"

"I very much like," she says as her eyes rake over my body. "I forgot how good you looked in a power suit."

"So did I," I reply half seriously and half joking. "It's good to know I've still got it."

"And how," Ashley remarks before coming towards me. She puts her arms around me and I let out a happy sigh. I love being in her arms. "How are you feeling?"

"Mostly OK with a side of anxiety," I tell her.

Ashley places the softest of kisses on my lips. "You're going to do great, Spence. I know it."

"Thanks for your vote of confidence." I reluctantly leave her embrace to gather up my belongings. I am determined not to be late today. Or any day for that matter. "Are you and Kyla going to stay out of trouble?"

"Yes, mom," Ashley replies with an exaggerated eye roll. "I think I'll take her down to the studio so she can see how things really work when an artist is recording an album."

"Sounds like a plan." Once I've packed up my briefcase, I walk with Ashley downstairs to our empty kitchen. I assume Kyla is still sleeping. Kids today! "I have no idea what time I'll be home tonight, but I'll make sure to message you when I know."

"Don't even worry about it, I'll be fine." Ashley assures me. I'm about to give her a kiss goodbye when she pulls out something from around the corner. "Here you go, for your first day."

I let out a laugh but I also get choked up when I see what she's gotten me.

A lunch box.

More specifically, a Barbie lunch box.

My emotions are still all over the place, but I thankfully manage to keep myself somewhat composed. I hope everyone can be with someone as wonderful and as thoughtful as my girl.

"You're the best," I say when I'm sure I'm not going to have a breakdown. I give her a kiss before I head out the door. "I love you."

"Don't you forget it!" Ashley calls out to me as I get into the Spencermobile. "And I love you too!"

I pull out of the driveway feeling a little better about my upcoming day and the change that is about to happen in my life.

I better not screw this up!

* * *

OK, so I've arrived a little early to the office.

And by a little, I mean almost an hour.

It's not my fault! The last thing I wanted was for traffic to foul up my goal of being the best little worker bee there is.

It feels weird to be back here in a publicist capacity. I've spent so much time in these offices, but that seems like a lifetime ago. There doesn't seem to be anyone else around and I'm not really sure what I'm supposed to be doing or where I'm supposed to be.

I think about all the hours my dad has put into this place and, as wonderful a business as he's managed to grow, I can't help but feel resentful towards it. I know my dad shoulders most of the blame for his heart attack. That doesn't stop me from wishing things could have been different.

I feel a little out of sorts just standing around, so I decide to head to my dad's office. Maybe being inside it will help me feel closer to him. When I do get inside, a rush of emotions hit me like a truck. I think he collapsed in here, this is where he made himself sick and this place almost cost him his marriage.

No!

I can't let my feelings overwhelm me now!

It's time for Business Spencer to be in charge and she lets her head guide her, not her heart.

I walk around his desk and see all the pictures he has of us around him. I really hope that if anything good can come out of his heart attack, he'll realize how blessed and lucky he is. And, most importantly, that money and success are no substitutes for having and appreciating a loving family.

I actually think that is a lesson most people need to learn. Ideally, before they get the most awful of wake up calls like my dad did.

"I thought I heard someone in here."

"Morning, Madison," I say after I look up from the pictures. "You're here early."

"I could say the same thing to you," she replies.

"First day back jitters," I explain. There's no use in trying to act cool and suave right now. I'm feeling the exact opposite of that. There's ball of nerves in my stomach as I try to figure out what I want to say. This is the first time I've seen Madison since she saved my dad's life. Nobody knows what would have happened if she hadn't intervene when he first collapsed.

How do I properly say thank you for what she did?

How can I ever express how unbelievably grateful I am that she was around when his heart attack happened?

I don't know if there are any words for what I want to tell her.

Instead of fumbling around or acting awkward, I walk over to my one time rival and give her a hug that hopefully conveys everything I want to. "Thank you so much."

Madison accepts my hug, but she moves back from me fairly quickly. "It was nothing, really."

"It was not nothing, what you did was amazing," I counter, but I can tell she doesn't want to dwell on it and I don't want to make her uncomfortable. "But not to worry, I'll still insult you when the situation arises."

"Back at you," she replies and she seems relieved that I'm not dwelling on her heroics. "I wasn't sure where you wanted to work, so we can either set you up here or in your old office."

"This is good." My old office is Madison's office now and I'm not going to kick her out even if it might feel a little odd sitting at my dad's desk.

This is all so surreal.

Madison hands me a stack of files. "Here are a couple of things you can go over to get back into the swing of things. If you don't mind, that is?"

I'm happy for the distraction – I don't even care what she's giving me. "I don't mind at all."

Madison leaves me to get started after giving me some brief directions on what needs to be done.

Here's hoping I'm not too rusty!

About forty-five minutes later, my head is still down, I haven't looked at my phone once and I feel like I'm making actual progress.

Who knew how therapeutic hard work could be!

"Well, well, well, do my eyes deceive me or is that Spencer Carlin already at work before nine o'clock? It must be a mirage of some sort."

I scoff at Jessie and then I stop what I'm doing. "Nobody asked you for your opinion."

"That's why it's so much fun to give," she playfully fires back. Jessie walks over to me and I get up to give her a giant hug. I've been giving and receiving a lot of hugs lately. "It's so good to have you here."

"You say that now, just give it a few days," I joke as we continue to embrace. "Soon enough you'll be kicking me out the door."

"That's probably true. I guess I will just use and abuse you until that happens."

I lean against my dad's desk once Jessie and I are done getting touchy feely with each other. "Oh, Ms. James, you're a married woman now, you really have to stop flirting with me."

She punches my arm. "Wow, Spence, your ego has only gotten bigger with age."

"Oh my god!" Glen squeals as he enters my dad's office. "I can't believe you guys didn't tell me that our reunion was taking place."

It's nice to see Glen back to his abnormal self.

He runs over to Jessie and me and then he sweeps us up into his arms.

More hugging time!

"I'm so happy!" he squeals even louder. "The Three Musketeers are back together again!"

Or Three Stooges, depending on how you look at it.

We're talking over each other and I have to say it really is great to be with the two of them again like this. Even if the circumstances that lead to us reuniting are less than ideal.

Unfortunately, our bonding time is cut short when Glen gets called out to a meeting. I want to find out how he's doing so he's promised we'll do lunch this week.

"I should probably be going too," Jessie says after my brother has left. "As much fun as this is, I am needed elsewhere."

"Excuse me, Ms. Carlin, I don't mean to interrupt." That voice belongs to one of the assistants, I presume.

"Please, it's Spencer and you're not interrupting at all."

"Oh good, I just wanted to let you know that these just arrived for you." She hands me a big bouquet of flowers that I hadn't notice before.

Aw!

I don't even need to read the card to know who they're from.

Aw!

How is it possible for Ashley to be so darn sweet?

It's a mystery that will never be solved I suppose.

"Thanks." I take the flowers and put them on the desk. I am going to have fun looking at these all day.

"Enjoy your flowers," Jessie says to me before she leaves for parts unknown.

You're damn right I will.

You'd think I'd be used to how wonderful Ashley is, but I'm not.

I am so in love with her.

So utterly in love.

Once I'm done gawking at my surprise, I take the card that came with the flowers so I can read the message my girl sent me.

_Even though I'm going to miss having you around as much,_

_I support your decision 100%. I'm proud of you and _

_I know that this is the right decision for our family._

_I love you._

_Ashley_

Aw!

Our family!

I am really gushing right now.

As much as I would love to call Ashley to say thank you for her thoughtfulness, I still need to finish what Madison gave me and we have a staff meeting in half an hour.

I message her instead.

Being responsible isn't always easy!

But I'm sure going to try my very best to be as focused as I can, for as long as necessary.

* * *

I am tired!

Worn out!

Drained!

Tired, even!

It's nine-thirty, at night, and I'm just getting home.

I can't believe it either!

But there is so much work to catch up on. Clearing this backlog is not going to be easy but it has to be done.

Is it me or are my thoughts not as much fun as they used to be?

I can't quite place my finger on why that is.

Weird.

I barely get the door open before I'm greeted by a certain brunette who has the sexiest of bodies.

"Welcome home," she says and then I get rewarded with a kiss. "You must be exhausted."

Ain't that the truth.

I nod my head and I'm about to go in for another kiss when Ashley takes my briefcase and lunch box from my hands. "Let me take care of this for you."

"Stop being so perfect!" I lie. I don't want that at all. "You're starting to make me look bad."

Ashley gives me the sweetest of smiles with a full on nose crinkle. "I can't help that I'm super amazing. It's a gift."

And people think I have a big ego!

"Did you have a good day?" I ask once Ashley returns from putting my things down.

"Well, it wasn't as much fun without you around," she starts and then she decides to start rubbing my shoulders.

It feels so fucking good.

So.

Fucking.

Good.

"Mmmmmmmm" is the only response that I can manage.

"But I had a lot of fun with Kyla." She continues to use her magic fingers to make me happy. "She's not that bad after all."

Aw!

Ashley is discovering the joy of having a sibling!

Wait until Kyla breaks something of hers, though. Then she'll discover the dark underbelly of what having a sibling means.

Yes, Glen Carlin, I'm talking about you!

He broke my Easy Bake Oven and I've never forgiven him.

Never!

I had my whole career as a gourmet chef planned out!

Bam!

And he ruined everything!

Everything!

"Mmmmmmmmmm."

Her fingers are incredible.

Ashley wraps her arms around me from behind. "How about you and me go take a bath so you can relax after your long day?"

That sounds like the best idea ever!

Ashley and I will be naked.

Naked!

In the same place.

And the same time.

Together.

Together!

That hasn't happened in...

Hold on...

My word, has it really been that long?

I'm like a born again virgin.

But here's the thing, sexy times with Ashley, me picturing naked Ashley, me thinking of what I will do with naked Ashley and me fantasizing about all the things I want naked Ashley to do to me have been known to take up a lot of my room in my brain.

Shocking, I know.

I can't really afford to go there at this point in time. There are too many people counting on me and too many commitments that I have for me to be distracted.

It sucks so bad!

Trust me!

If, for example, Ashley and I were to unleash all of our sexual frustrations tonight, I could be up with her until the crack of dawn.

Do you know how long we've gone without getting physical?

I wouldn't be able to stop.

And neither would she.

Which, under normal circumstances, is the absolute fucking best.

Literally.

But, my mind has to stay sharp and focused. I don't want to let anyone down and I don't want to let myself down either.

I have to be in the office early again tomorrow and I can't do that if all my energy – which is already at a low – is taken up by having sex with Ashley.

Plus, and it pains me to say this, but ever since that phone call from my mom that I got in the kitchen a couple of weeks back, my libido has gone bye-bye.

I'm sure it will be back.

It better come back.

Pun intended!

I hope Ashley understands what I'm about to do.

God, look away if you can, I never thought these words would ever come from my mouth.

I turn around, feeling awful and like a bad partner. "Ash, the thing is-"

My wonderful, amazing, unbelievable girlfriend kisses my forehead before I can finish the horrid sentence I was about to say. "Just a bath and then we'll get you to bed." Her warm eyes are so understanding. "To sleep."

"That sounds like the best offer I've had all day," I gratefully reply.

As I lie in said bath, naked, wrapped in the arms of the girl I love more than anything, I can honestly say that the intimacy and connectedness I feel towards Ashley is better than anything I've felt in a very long time.

And how!


	34. Chapter 34

**A/N Hey there to all of you left still reading :) I have no real excuse for why my updates have been so few and far between. This year has been the best of my life (I got engaged!) and the hardest of my life (dealing with a dad that is sick) so writing hasn't been the priority I've wanted it to be. I won't make a promise of when I will be able to update again, but I am going to do my absolute best to finish this story. I'm probably about 15-20 chapters from being done. Thanks again to all of you for reading, reviewing and sending me PMs, it is always something I appreciate**

Chapter 34

All work and no play makes Spencer a dull girl.

All work and no play makes Spencer a dull girl.

All work and no play makes Spencer a dull girl.

My life is so boring right now.

Productive.

But boring.

Busy.

But boring.

Useful.

But boring.

You get the idea.

I can't remember the last time I've had so little fun. Surprisingly, though, I'm OK with having no life besides my job.

I'm not going the way of my dad and making work my whole life.

Please.

I'm no dummy.

Contrary to what some people might believe.

But I am throwing myself into this (temporary) job as much as I can.

It's not easy, mind you.

This is what my day consists of: work, work, work, message Ashley. Work, work, read Ashley's message back to me. Work, work, work, arrive home, spend a bit of time with Ashley, work a bit more and then pass out in bed as I cuddle into my lady.

Whew.

I'm exhausted just thinking about it.

I have no idea what my dad was thinking when he didn't hire additional staff to take handle the amount of work we've been getting. Not very smart, Mr. Carlin.

Even my thoughts are boring.

Damn.

Remember when all I would think about was Ashley naked?

Or in a bikini.

And about having lots of sex with her.

Remember that?

Seems like a lifetime ago.

Ages really.

Sigh.

Boo!

Hiss!

I'm dull.

Oh well.

At least my poetry skills haven't gone to shit.

I'm going to try and make it home at a decent time tonight. I haven't been able to do that since I returned to the life of a high power executive.

That's weird.

Why do I hear laughing in my head?

"Hey, Spence."

I look up for my desk to find my brother standing at my office door. You'd think over the last couple of weeks we would have spent a lot of time together. But that's not the case at all.

As much as I've been spending time at the office, a lot of what I've been doing doesn't involve Glen. When it does, we're both really focused on getting things done. If that's not the sign of an impending apocalypse, I don't know what is. It's not to say that Glen and I can't work hard, it's just that we're easily distracted.

Yeah, that's it.

"You busy?" he asks me as I continue the inner dialogue in my head.

I bet if people really knew what went on in my mind they'd be truly horrified. Luckily that's just our little secret.

No one has to know.

Not a soul.

Wait.

What was I talking about?

"For you, I have no time to spare," I reply hilariously.

Good to know my amazing sense of humour has not been damaged by recent events.

Glen rolls his eyes at me. "I think you can spare a few minutes for lunch because I know you haven't eaten yet."

Speaking of not eating…

What?

Sex might not be my top priority at this moment, but it doesn't mean I can't have fleeting thoughts of fancy.

It's the only thing getting me by most days.

Boo!

Hiss!

I'm being overly dramatic again.

Oh well.

"Yo, Spence, stop spacing out on me," Glen says as he hands me the sandwich he so thoughtfully brought with him.

Aw!

He's a jerk, but he's still my brother from the same mother.

"Shut up, ass," I say even though he's right about me spacing out.

We make small talk for a little while, but I have a feeling Glen is holding something back.

I really do have a sick sense about these things.

What?

"Everything OK?" I ask once I'm done eating.

Glen sighs and then he gets up to close my office door before he sits back down. Maybe he's firing me!

But I'm a good worker!

I swear!

My imagination is so ridiculous at times.

Honestly.

"Aiden came by last night," Glen starts, sounding uneasy.

"You guys have been seeing a lot of each other lately," I reply. I think Aiden has been a good support system for my brother.

Lord knows Glen needs it.

"Yeah, he's been great," Glen sighs again and call me crazy, but I don't think he's about to announce a reconciliation between the two of them. "He's started dating someone-"

That asshole!

How dare he hurt my brother like that!

I mean…

Whoa.

Wait a second.

Why the hell am I getting mad at Aiden?

I guess some old habits are hard to break.

He's done nothing wrong here.

It's my brother who went and fucked everything up.

And even though he did, I can't help but feel incredibly sorry for him as he looks at me with the saddest eyes.

He is, at heart, a good person.

A good person who did a dumb, stupid, moronic, selfish, awful thing.

You get the picture.

"I'm really sorry." I wish there was something more I could do, but I know this hurts and nothing I say right now will change that.

Glen shrugs half heartedly. "It's my fault. You shouldn't feel sorry for me."

"Doesn't mean that you're not hurting."

"I don't know why the idea of marrying Aiden freaked me out." This is the first time Glen is opening up to me about what happened. "But it did and I know I should have talked to him or anyone about it."

I want to offer him some wise Spencer wisdom, but I stay silent.

"I messed up big time, Spence, and I'm lucky that Aiden's still willing to be my friend," Glen continues, as sad as ever. "I started going to therapy…"

His voice trails off and I can tell he's wanting me to say something. "About time, you've had a few screws loose for as long as I remember."

"And I'm the ass!" Glen fires back, but he's laughing.

Look, I'm not an unfeeling douche bag.

I know what Glen is telling me isn't easy.

And I also know that the best way to get him to relax is to joke around.

That's how both of us roll.

"I just call them how I see them," I reply. The mood in my office is surprisingly light. I'm beyond happy that Glen has opened up to me and I will support my brother no matter what. I put my hand over his clenched fist. "Whatever you need, I'm here for you."

"Thanks, Spence," Glen says sincerely. "And not to worry, my therapist offers a family discount, so whenever you decide to fix your many problems, I've got your back."

I love that I have this kind of relationship with my brother.

We don't always get a long.

We sometimes say really means things to one another in the heat of a moment.

But at the end of the day, we are there for each other.

Whether it's support that's needed, a kick in the butt or an inappropriate joke to make each other laugh.

I'm really lucky to have him in my life.

"You are in so much trouble!" I exclaim right before I get up to give my Glen the punch he so rightly deserves.

Glen shrieks in fear because he knows all about my mean right hook. He runs out of my office before I can catch him, and as much as I'll make him pay for it later, it's good to have talked with him about what's going on.

I return to my desk a little out of breath but feeling better than I've felt in a very long time. I send Ashley a message to tell her I love her and then I put my head down and get back to what I was doing.

Whoever this new Spencer is, I hope she's not here to stay for too long.

She really is no fun at all.

* * *

Many, many, many, many, many hours later I'm getting ready leave for the night.

I'm tired.

Like that needed to be said.

Anyway, I promised my parents that I'd stop by on the way home even with me feeling l like I could sleep for weeks.

My dad is recovering from a heart attack and major surgery, but he's looking the best I've seen him in a very long time. Not working really agrees with him.

Preach!

I remember the days when the only job I had was being Ashley's PR person.

Those were the days, my friend.

We thought they'd never end.

We'd sing and fuck forever in a day.

What?

I didn't even mean to do that lyric change!

My deprived brain is more powerful than I could have possibly imagined. If I just channeled all my energy into the right place, I could really start to think about world domination.

Who runs the world?

Spencer!

I'm even loopier than I realized.

As I walk out of the office, I notice the light in Madison's office still on. That girl seems to always be here. I'd lecture her on work/life balance but I'm too pooped to say anything right now.

That conversation will have to wait.

Man, I'm exhausted.

Thankfully I can drive to my parent's on auto pilot. I let out the hugest yawn before I get out the Spencermobile. Now is not the time to act worn out.

Now is the time to show my dad that I'm doing my part for my family.

Family comes first!

If I didn't know better, I'd say I sounded like some kind of movie mobster.

Who am I kidding; I wouldn't last three seconds in prison.

What if Ashley was a guard there?

Ashley and me in prison.

Gah!

I have to shut down that part of my brain this instant!

No matter how much I want to play out a prison fantasy in my head.

Or in person.

With handcuffs.

No!

No no no!

I shake my head a few times to get rid of my dirty thoughts.

Not something that is easy to do, let me tell you.

Once I have my loins in check, however fragile my hold over them is, I step inside the house.

I hear the sound of laughter coming from the den so I decide to head in that direction. It's so much better than the sound of fighting I'd come to expect when I was at my mom and dad's. That wasn't fun at all.

At all!

When I see what's going on in the den, my heart melts all over the floor.

Into a giant puddle!

It's so big I could drown in it!

My mom, my dad, Ashley and Kyla are playing what I think is Charades.

How cute!

Adorable!

Sweet!

And whatever other synonyms that I might know!

I'm so out of it I didn't even realize that Ashley's car was in the driveway. I probably shouldn't admit that to anyone because they'll start worrying about my driving.

And we all know that my driving is impeccable.

What?

It is!

My mom and Ashley are on one team and my dad and Kyla are the other team.

Aw!

I watch the four of them trash talk each other for a little bit, before I clear my throat to announce my presence.

Can I just say how my heart skips all sorts of beats with the way that Ashley's face lights up when she sees me. I mean sure, everyone else is happy to see me, but the expression on my fiancée's face is just the best.

The best!

I hope she looks at me like that for the rest of my life.

Our life.

Speaking of which, I really need to start planning our wedding. That's going on my to-do list right now!

If anything, my dad almost dying made me realize how precious life is.

My precious!

Wait!

I actually was trying to make a point.

Anyway, I think you get my drift.

My women runs up to give me a kiss. And as much as I would love to keep kissing her all night, I don't think my family wants to be a witness to that.

"You look absolutely beautiful," she whispers in my ear as she pulls away.

I shake my head and mouth "liar" to her because I know I look like I've been run over by a truck.

Figuratively speaking of course!

One stay in the hospital for my family right now is more than enough!

After I say hi to everyone my mom and Kyla disappear into the kitchen to get us snacks and Ashley has to leave to take a call from one of the musicians she's been mentoring.

It's a new thing that started when she introduced Kyla to Stan.

And she's really run with it.

Not that I should be surprised, Ashley is a really good teacher.

That reminds me of this one time…

"Late night at the office?" my dad asks before I can access the part of my brain that is off limits right now.

I flop down on the couch beside him, and give my father a gentle slap across his arm. "You know you're not supposed to be asking me about work. Don't make me tell me mom!"

I can be Tough Spencer when I need to be.

She's pretty bad ass.

"No, no, you misunderstand me," my dad holds his arms up in surrender. "I was just making small talk."

I purse my lips together and give him a look that says you better not be lying to me. "Ask me about the weather then. Or something political. Or about the whatever sports team you love. Or about something else that isn't forbidden."

Instead of asking me anything, my dad leans over kisses me on my forehead. "You really are one of a kind, Spence." Before I can ask if he's trying to insult me, he keeps going. "In all seriousness though, you do look tired and I want to make sure you're not working too hard."

Ha!

Ha ha!

That's rich coming from him.

It's almost enough to make me laugh.

That is until I realize that – and even though he was being polite – the artist formerly known as my dad just told me I look like crap.

How dare he!

I suppose his recent health crisis gives him a pass.

This time!

"I'm fine," I reassure my dad but he looks unconvinced. I draw an "X" over my heart. "Promise!"

My dad lets out a big sigh and that makes my stomach tense. I already had Glen sigh at me today and what he had to say wasn't all kittens and rainbows. "I know we both decided we shouldn't apologize anymore," he sighs again while I try not to freak the fuck out. Good to know some things never change. "But I really am sorry for what I put you through."

"I know you didn't do any of this on purpose."

He may be a huge workaholic, but my dad is the best man I know.

The best!

He shakes his head. "But I knew what I was doing, Spence and didn't stop myself. What I've put you through, your mom, everyone, I'm an ass."

I guess that's where Glen gets is from.

What?

Come on, that was a teensy bit funny.

"You're not an ass," I reassure the man that's been there for me my whole life. "You just forgot what was important for a little while."

"That's an understatement," my dad replies with a bit of chuckle. "I almost blew everything because I didn't realize I already had everything I needed in my life."

It's still kind of hard to be around my dad.

Not because I don't love him.

That goes without saying

I'm still feeling guilty about his heart attack and the role I think I played in it. Logically that's probably not true, but logic has never been my strong suit.

I know I won't always feel this way and I also know that I'm not about to let that issue get in the way of spending as much time with my dad and my whole family.

It seems both of us are still coming to terms with our guilt.

Like father, like daughter.

"But you didn't." I say to reassure him.

"Only because I was lucky," my dad replies. "I'm never going to repeat the mistakes I've made in the past. Your mom is giving me a second chance and I hope all of you will as well."

"Of course I won't be giving you a second chance." I only realize after it comes out of my mouth, how wrong that sounded. "You've been the best dad any girl could ask for, you've never needed a second chance with me."

My dad tears up and that makes me tear up as well.

We really are a lot alike.

Some would call us mush balls, but I prefer it be described as being in touch with our emotions.

"You better not be sitting around all day feeling sorry for yourself." I give my dad a stern look but I don't think he's intimidated by me. "You can't change the past, dad, you can only look forward to the future."

Whoa.

Where did that come from?

It was almost poetic.

"Pretty good advice there, Spence," my dad says before he tussles my hair. "I always said you're a chip off the old block."

There's a bubble of emotion sitting in my throat right now. I will not let it come out because I don't want to have an outburst like I've been prone to do lately. It's just that at moments like this – moments of bonding with my dad – do I realize how much I need him.

How much I want him around for many, many years to come.

And how much I really love him.

"I did learn from the best." My voice cracks a bit, but I manage to keep myself together.

I do go in for a hug, though. There's something very reassuring about my dad's hugs.

We exchange "I love yous" because how could we not and I'm pretty impressed that I didn't burst into tears.

Maybe there's hope for me after all.

"I'm thinking of surprising your mom with a trip around the world," my dad whispers to me after he's looked around to make sure she's still in the kitchen.

And that makes me cry.

Dammit!

So close!

"That's a great idea," I tell him as I wipe the tears from my eyes. "She's going to love it."

"I hope so," he replies before handing me a tissue. "Once the doctor gives me the OK, think you can help me plan it?"

"I would love to!" I exclaim with genuine enthusiasm.

I've missed Ashley so much as I've been working my tush off, but I've also missed just being with family.

Even Glen.

We've hardly had any time together that hasn't involved hospitals or the office lately.

That needs to change.

"If you're feeling up to it, how would you like it if we did a Carlin family barbeque this Saturday?" I ask my dad even though I know what he's going to say.

"That's a question that doesn't need asking," he replies just like I thought he would.

"But you won't be doing the cooking, OK? You have to take it easy!" I command.

That point is not negotiable.

And even though I'm sure he's going to fight me on that point, this time when I attempt a stern look I manage it with success.

My dad just nods instead of arguing that he can handle it.

I think a family get together is just what the doctor ordered.

Under normal circumstances that would trigger a thought about playing doctor with Ashley, but in case you haven't been able to tell, I'm too worn-out for that to happen.

Boo!

Hiss!

Oh well, this dry spell can't last forever.

Right?


End file.
